Game of Thrones’ eighth and final season is set to premiere in 2047. I’m kidding, of course, but it is likely to not premiere until 2019. So, get ready for the LONGEST 2018 ever. However, that hasn’t stopped fans of the show from speculating exactly what will go down during the final season.
The final season of Game of Thrones is the end of a long, long journey. If you think back to the first episode, things were a lot different. There were many, many more Starks, namely the glorious Ned Stark. In that episode, Jaime had proven to be the world’s worst person, as he was having sexual relations with his twin sister and had pushed a 10-year-old out a window to cover it up, and Daenerys seemed like a ineffectual character, as she was being traded like livestock. Who would have thought Jaime would evolve into a fan-favorite and Daenerys into the bad-ass woman who flies into battle on dragons? Also, who would have thought we’d all be rooting for an aunt and nephew to get it on? Like I said, it’s been a journey, y’all.
Because how of things have developed and the show’s nature of constantly surprising the entire audience, we really have no idea how it will end. Sure, there are some things we can assume will happen. It’s likely the Army of the Dead will be defeated and Cersei Lannister will be booted from the Iron Throne. But we don’t know.
So, what are the things that can, like, 100% not happen? Below are 16 things that absolutely no one wants to see in the eighth and final season of Game of Thrones. These things better NOT happen, HBO.
16. First Of All, Tormund’s Death
Game of Thrones season seven ended with the cruelest of all cliffhangers. And no, I don’t mean the complete and utter destruction of the Wall, which had supposedly stood for thousands of years. I’m talking about the fate of everyone’s favorite wildling, Tormund. In fact, this giant ginger warrior is pretty much the only wildling the audience knows at this point. Seriously, name another wildling on the show right now. I dare you.
When the Wall fell, Tormund was right there. RIGHT THERE! It will be ridiculously sad if we return to season eight only to find Tormund died in the fall of the Wall. Luckily for fans of Tormund, though, it’s likely Game of Thrones would have shown us Tormund dying. Like I said, he’s the only wildling we really know and producers are aware of this. They’re not simply going to show everyone’s favorite ginger wildling dying and be like, “Oh, by the way, he died when the Wall fell. No biggie.”
If Tormund is alive and well, which he better be, maybe his near death experience will push him towards telling Brienne of Tarth he’s been feeling some feelings. I mean, if Brienne and Tormund don’t get together and make the largest ginger children the world’s ever seen, I just don’t know why we’ve been watching this show.
15. One Dragon Death Was Enough, Thanks
Hard pass on another dragon dying, thank you.
Truth be told, Viserion’s death at the hands of the Night King was sad, but certainly not as sad as, say, Drogon’s death would have been. And that’s not just because Drogon is clearly Daenerys’ favorite dragon. Like, very clearly. I’m actually surprised there’s no weird sibling rivalry between them, considering the obvious favoritism.
Drogon dying would be disastrous due to the fact that he’s the largest dragon and causes the most destruction. With an ice dragon in the mix, Daenerys needs all the firepower she can muster, so she needs Drogon. Losing Drogon may prove to be fatal for all humanity, as he may be the only thing capable of taking down Icy Viserion.
Long story short, another dragon dying would likely mean the Army of the Dead will win. If the Army of the Dead gets TWO ice dragons at their disposable, all humanity is screwed. Daenerys needs to have those dragons wearing armor or something. Damn it, Daenerys! Protect your children!
14. Jon Snow vs Daenerys Targaryen
Ah, the very complicated relationship between Jon Snow and Daenerys Targaryen. Though, he’s not really Jon Snow. Jon Snow’s real name is Aegon Targaryen, as he’s the legitimate son of Rhaegar Targaryen and Lyanna Stark. This, of course, means Jon Snow is the rightful heir to the Iron Throne, which is funny since Daenerys has been talking a big game in the rightful heir department.
How will this sticky situation shake out? Um, I don’t know! Jon Snow (sorry, not calling him Aegon until he calls himself that) has never showed any real interest in taking the Iron Throne, while it’s the only thing Daenerys has ever wanted. It doesn’t seem like Jon Snow would go head-to-head with Daenerys just because he has the right. Though, entitlement to power can change a person. Both Robb Stark and Renly Baratheon didn’t seem to want the Iron Throne until it was dangled before them. There’s also the fact that Jon Snow, who has the support of the North, may have an easier time keeping peace.
13. Um, Jon Snow And Daenerys Targaryen Getting Together
Here’s a real question: Do fans actually want to see Daenerys Targaryen and Jon Snow continue to get it on once they know they’re related?
Sure, fans of the show were very, very into their first steamy hookup. In fact, fans rooted HARD for this aunt/nephew to hook up. But the same fans who were rooting for this inc*st also had to reason it away. Most people claimed that the inc*st wasn’t that bad since Jon and Daenerys didn’t know it was inc*st, never mind that the whole audience knew.
So, when Jon and Daenerys do know it’s inc*st, will fans still root for this very attractive couple to get it on? Some fans might, but many of us may also want our two heroes to stop banging after they find out they’re aunt and nephew. I mean, won’t it kind of weird us all out if they just shrug their shoulders and keep banging it out? Plus, at least we got that one sexy scene.
12. Tyrion Lannister Being Lovesick Over Daenerys
What is even up with Tyrion Lannister? First of all, there was simply not enough Tyrion in season seven. In the first episode, he literally didn’t say any word. Tyrion– the most linguistically gifted person on Game of Thrones– didn’t even have a line in season seven’s first episode. Besides that, Tyrion was on a losing streak in season seven. When Daenerys actually listened to his advice, his advice failed her. Eventually, Daenerys stopped listening to his advice altogether, which made his role as Hand to the Queen pretty ineffectual.
The season ended with Tyrion awkwardly watching as Jon entered Daenerys’ cabin. Tyrion looked… well, he was feeling some feelings. Though, there are many theories on what was going on with Tyrion here. Some think Tyrion knows Cersei is lying about sending her troops to the North, and Tyrion’s guilt is eating at him. Others theorize that Tyrion worries about this new relationship affecting Daenerys’ judgment. The theory that probably shouldn’t come true is that Tyrion has been in love with Daenerys this whole time and he’s been playing a long game with her. I mean, not only did Tyrion advise Daenerys to banish Jorah Mormont, who was in love with her, but he also advised Daenerys to leave Daario Naharis, who was also in love with her, behind in Meereen. Tyrion has been successful in separating Daenerys from her lovers, but now Jon Snow is in the picture.
11. An Unhappy Ending For Tyrion Lannister
Since we’re talking about Tyrion Lannister, let’s just keep talking about ol’ Tyrion Lannister. While we can all brace ourselves for a final season full of carnage, there’s very few fans who would deal with Tyrion Lannister dying. I mean. he’s TYRION LANNISTER, a character to whom fans have bonded with very strongly.
There’s also the fact that Tyrion has lived a pretty terrible life for the most part. I mean, his own father hated him, until Tyrion finally murdered him. His sister, who also hated him since birth, and his brother have had their own private s*x parties for years. Oh, there was also that one time Tyrion got married, only to find out that his wife was a pr*stitute and it was all an elaborate joke. Tyrion then fell for Shay, only to have her betray him and bang his dad.
Basically, Tyrion’s life has been a dumpster fire and, yet, he’s still optimistic about the future. If anyone deserves a happy end, it’s Tyrion Lannister. In fact, I think most fans would even be okay with Tyrion Lannister somehow ending up on the Iron Throne himself, though it seems like the unlikeliest of things to happen.
10. A Complete White Walker Victory (Bye, Humans!)
This should go without saying, but I’m going to say it. I don’t think anyone wants to tune into season eight only to watch all their favorite characters be slaughtered by the Army of the Dead. Sure, we all want to see hardcore battle sequences against the White Walkers. That will be awesomely entertaining. What wouldn’t be awesomely entertaining is to watch the Army of the Dead kill literally everyone. What will have been the point of this whole show, then?
Of course, the Army of the Dead have a solid chance of winning. They have an ice dragon and thousands of soldiers. Plus, their army grows every single time they kill someone. Unfortunately though, all your favorites– Daenerys, Jon, Tyrion, Jorah, the Hound, Jaime– are heading to Winterfell and have no idea about the ice dragon or the fall of the Wall, which are two game-changing pieces of information.
And let us not forget the very first scene of the series, in which we see White Walkers mercilessly kill humans. If that opening scene foreshadows the path of the series, the White Walkers may seriously come out on top. However, let’s hope that doesn’t happen.
9. Any Of Our Favorite Warriors Dying
Ugh, we know this is going to happen, but that doesn’t mean we have to like it.
At this point in time, there are several fearless warriors in the world of Game of Thrones: Grey Worm, Brienne of Tarth, Jaime Lannister, Tormund, the Hound, Jorah Mormont, Bronn, Gendry, Arya Stark, and, of course, Jon Snow. Just to name a few. These are all brave, badass characters who aren’t going to sit back and clip their toenails while the Army of the Death destroys their world. They are going to fight and it will be epic. However, it will also result in quite a few fatalities.
If you have common sense, you can’t really think all of the great warriors will make it out of season eight alive. Between the threat of the Army of the Dead and the impending showdown for the Iron Throne, things aren’t looking good. Quite frankly, you can pretty much be guaranteed that nearly all of the great warriors will die. But hey, just be glad season seven was pretty gentle to us. The only huge deaths were Viserion, the Sand Snakes, and Olenna Tyrell, who lived longer than anyone ever on Game of Thrones. Even Grey Worm made it out of season seven alive, despite hooking up with Missandei, which seemed like a “Grey Worm’s going to die” red flag.
8. Purely Good vs Purely Evil Showdown
We know there will be two necessary showdowns in season eight: one against the White Walkers and one for the Iron Throne. It’s easy to distill these battles down to an issue of good vs. evil, but that’s really never been Game of Thrones’ thing. Instead, Game of Thrones likes to make us all question what is good and evil. Take Jaime Lannister. This was a dude who threw a 10-year-old boy out of a window in the pilot episode, and now Jaime is a character people root for. I mean, Jaime r*ped Cersei, and, somehow, fans were rooting for him to walk away from her.
Likewise, many of our favorite characters are not wholly good or evil, like Daenerys, Arya, the Hound, or Jorah. All of these characters have done some morally questionable things. On Game of Thrones, morality is a complicated thing. That said, seeing straight-up good vs. evil battles would betray the tone of Game of Thrones. It would be much more interesting and much more Game of Thrones-y if it turned out that the White Walkers are really good guys. Or, the the very least, that the White Walkers think they’re the good guys.
7. Cersei Lannister Birthing Another Joffrey
Nope, no one wants to see Cersei Lannister give birth to another evil spawn.
Tommen and Myrcella were actually sweet, gentle creatures, so I wouldn’t call them “spawn.” Joffrey, on the other hand, was one of Game of Thrones’ most vile villains and he was only a teenager. Cersei either births delicate angels or horrible demons. Clearly, when it comes to Cersei’s offspring, it’s a dice roll, and most fans don’t want to roll that dice.
Luckily, fans will probably be spared a possible Joffrey 2.0, as it seems very unlikely Cersei will live through the series or birth this child. That said, there are theories that this pregnancy may end in a fatal miscarriage, which would finally be the thing that kills Cersei Lannister. In a way, that would be extremely poetic. Cersei has always hated Tyrion because their mother died giving birth to him. It would be interesting, then, if Cersei died in the same manner.
6. A Lot Of Theon Greyjoy
Um, why is Theon Greyjoy still on this goddamn show? I’m sorry, but no. No one wants to see Theon Greyjoy for one more minute, especially with season eight only being six episodes long.
Though, you can rest assured that Theon Greyjoy will be in season eight. I mean, the writers can just drop the whole Greyjoy plot. It’s likely Theon will get his mojo back and sacrifice himself while saving Yara. That’s cool, but it’s been a while since anyone gave a sh*t about Theon.
When introduced, Theon was one of the least likeable characters. Theon then went on to be tortured by Ramsay Bolton. This won Theon some sympathy points, but it also didn’t make anyone excited to see Theon scenes. Those torture scenes were disgusting. Since then, Theon went on to save Sansa and support his sister’s claim to the throne. This would have made the audience warm back up to Theon, but no. Theon’s plots are boring and his character is still unlikeable.
5. Another Season Full Of Plot Holes (Ugh, The Ravens!)
The plot hole issue is something that divided fans during season seven. Some fans thought the plot holes were a non-issue, as watching a show about dragons and ice zombies is already unbelievable in and of itself. Their reasoning was that if you’re going to get down with the fantasy elements of the show, you should be willing to overlook the plot holes. On the other hand, some fans felt that the plot holes chipped away at the believability of this fantasy world. This reasoning was that you can only buy into the fantasy elements if everything else is completely realistic. Whatever the case, season eight would certainly benefit from not falling victim to plot holes.
What exactly were the plot holes in season seven people took issue with? There was the fact Bronn, survived Drogon’s fire blast despite being only inches away. In the same episode, Bronn and Jaime also avoided death by jumping into nearby water. Both of them somehow didn’t drown, even though they were wearing armor and Jaime has a golden hand. A GOLDEN HAND.
In “Beyond the Wall,” nearly the whole episode was plot hole after plot hole. The most obvious issue was with a raven somehow getting to Dragonstone and Daenerys somehow getting beyond the Wall in, like, an hour. Remember when ravens used to take days to travel? There was also the fact that the Night King killed a flying Viserion, while Drogon– the largest dragon– was literally sitting on the ground. Also, Jon Snow surviving this episode at all seems completely impossible. Most of this episode didn’t make much sense, even though it was entertaining as hell.
4. A Painful Stark Death, Unless It’s Bran
Can we please, please be spared from another Stark death? PLEASE?
Admittedly, it’s been a while since we lost a Stark. There was the first, and arguably most painful, Stark death back in season one, when Ned Stark was beheaded. After that, the Starks fared well for a bit– that is, until the Red Wedding in season three. The Red Wedding depicted the end of Catelyn, Robb, Talisa, and Robb’s unborn child, who would have been the heir to Winterfell.
From there, the next major Stark to “die” was Jon Snow, but that was just silly. No one thought Jon Snow was dead for realsies, no matter how much HBO tried to fool us. In season six, Rickon Stark died, but that hardly counts as a Stark death. No one really got to know Rickon Stark, so his death was “meh.”
There are four standing Stark-blooded characters: Jon, Sansa, Arya, and Bran. The likelihood of all four of these characters making it out of season eight is slim, but one can hope. If we lose a Stark, the one that wouldn’t emotionally destroy the audience would be Bran, as he’s not really human anymore anyway. Plus, maybe death will fulfill his destiny and he’ll fully become the Three-Eyed Raven… or whatever it is he keeps talking about.
3. Everyone Living Happily Ever After
Game of Thrones fans have been put through the ringer. We have laughed, cried, screamed, and cried some more. Mostly, it’s just been the screaming and crying. That said, an easy ending would just feel false. I mean, Ned Stark didn’t lose his precious head just so everything could be tied up in an obvious way. No, thank you.
Sure, watching Jon Snow and Daenerys Targaryen slay the Army of the Dead and then co-rule would be pleasant for everyone, but it’s just not realistic. Also, it’s so obvious. Some of the Game of Thrones moments have been so utterly shocking. I mean, that “How do you answer these charges… Petyr Baelish,” moment was JAW-DROPPING. We need an ending like that scene. It needs to be something out of left field, but that also makes the most sense ever.
2. Cersei Lannister Winning The Game Of Thrones
What if the biggest twist of all was that Cersei Lannister just, like, keeps the Iron Throne? Guys, what if Cersei Lannister WINS?
Don’t worry, guys. There’s literally no way in hell Cersei Lannister is going to come out on top. In fact, Cersei’s already dug her grave and she’s just buying time before someone finally puts her in it. And the thing is, Cersei Lannister already knows this. In season one, Cersei Lannister told Ned Stark, “When you play the game of thrones, you win or you die.” Cersei is very well aware of the stakes. Cersei knew that sitting down on that Iron Throne made her the most powerful and most vulnerable person in Westeros. Cersei also knows that you don’t just win the Iron Throne once. You have to win the Iron Throne every single day until you die, naturally or by someone’s hand.
1. Two Words: Ed Sheeran
Pretty much all fans can agree that Ed Sheeran did not belong on any episode of Game of Thrones ever.
The real issue with Ed Sheeran appearance is that it felt obvious and forced. Ed Sheeran could have maybe appeared in the background of one of those Winterfell scenes, in which there are a zillion dudes who look like him. He would have blended right in. Instead, they wrote a useless scene just so Ed Sheeran could sing. Honestly, what were the writers thinking?
Of course, the reason for Sheeran being on the show is sweet. Apparently, Maisie Williams is a huge fan, so they brought Ed Sheeran on the show as a surprise to her. That said, it still could have been done in a much less obvious way. In fact, fans hated Ed Sheeran’s appearance so much that he ended up deleting his Twitter due to harassment.
If season eight could please not feature a weird, obvious celebrity cameo, that would be great.
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