You know how when you’re stopped in traffic and you come upon the scene of an accident, you don’t want to look at it, but you just do? Sometimes, you’ll see blood on the road or a person on a stretcher, and you think to yourself, “I knew I shouldn’t have looked at that.” Well, that’s kind of the way we feel about the Kylie and Kendall Jenner.
If you need to find two people who hit the DNA jackpot, these are the ladies. Yeah, their lives are hectic, and they’re constantly under the microscope, but it’s all by design… except when it’s not.
It’s one thing to be famous, make mistakes, and be able to hide them or simply admit you were wrong and move on. With the Jenner girls, they court attention like a fly to one of those bug lights. Of course, when they make a misstep, they don’t want us to know about it, but you can’t have 14 shows on the E! Network and post 200 times a day on Instagram and hope we’ll look away when it’s convenient for you.
There are plenty of secrets, scandals, skeletons in the closet, and truths they’ve only half-admitted that they’re hoping the rest of us either don’t know about or will forget soon. But like all of those selfies that will be stuck on the Internet forever for our great-grandchildren to wonder what the heck we were thinking with our idol worship of this duo, the negative stuff is there, too. Consider us historians, creating a record for future generations to study and enjoy. Here are 16 Things Kylie and Kendall hope you never find out.
16. Did Kylie really pull a knife on Kendall?
These girls need to be careful of what they say in public even when they’re just joking because people like us will read into things. When people make a joke, there’s usually a grain of truth behind it, and when they act out a joke, you’ve got to wonder if they secretly wish it were true. On an episode of MTV’s Ridiculousness, Kylie said that after a fight between her and Kendall, she pulled a knife on her supermodel sister. We wonder if this comes at all from a place of jealousy. Yeah, she got the headlines with the rapper boyfriend and probably has more business sense than her sister, but let’s be honest: Kendall does much better in the looks department, and when your image is based 90% on your looks and comparison with sisters who are all beautiful, there’s bound to be a little jealousy on Kylie’s part.
15. Kylie needs a designated driver
We couldn’t find many reports about what Kendall is like behind the wheel of a car, but her sister is a moving violation waiting to happen. Less than three weeks after getting her license, Kylie caused a three-car accident. In 2014, she was cited for four driving violations including tickets for illegal U-turns and speeding. We could just say she’s a bad driver, but she’s a dangerous driver because we’ve seen more than one Instagram and Snapchat coming from her from behind the wheel of a car. We could say she’s a bad driver and a dangerous driver, but she’s also no fan of the environment, driving a giant SUV that looks more like it belongs alongside Bigfoot and Grave Digger on the monster-truck circuit.
14. Kendall’s cryptic tattoo and what does it mean?
In 2016, Kendall Jenner got a tattoo when nobody was looking. Despite the fact she appears nearly naked in Instagram, in the pages of fashion magazines and on the runway, she was able to hide her tattoo from the public for months. That’s because she got it inside her mouth, on her inner lip. And what is it? The word “Meow.” Yeah, the thing the cat says. She told those close to her that she decided she wanted to get a tattoo on her face, and that was the only place she could think where it wouldn’t have an effect on her career. As to the meaning of the word “Meow”? There is none. She admits that she simply wanted the face tattoo and that when she got it in New York City, that was what sprung to mind. Well, nobody ever accused her of being the smart sister. Of course, we have no idea who actually does fill that role.
13. So, about Kylie’s bigger chest
Yeah, she finally fessed up to the lip injections, and she really doesn’t talk much about the allegations she’s had butt implants, but when it comes to her breasts, Kylie is all about telling people she did nothing to get the rack she’s currently sporting. Looking at a couple of her sisters, we’d tend to believe her, but there are quite a few photos out there of Kylie showing a bunch of side-boob on different red carpets, and you can see she’s got surgical tape covering her nipples, not the traditional tape used to keep outfits from moving around. Her two responses are usually to give credit to her favorite Victoria’s Secret bra and to get confrontational and saying something to the effect of, “Do you want to feel them to prove their real?” We never thought you’d ask.
12. Kendall is not cool with Bruce becoming Caitlyn
While most of the Kardashian clan to whom he’s a stepfather and Kylie seem to all be fine with and supportive of Bruce Jenner making the transition to Caitlyn, it’s something that Kendall has clearly been struggling with. She’s complained that he doesn’t do the kind of masculine things that she liked as a tomboy growing up, including dirt-biking. Kendall also took umbrage with her father’s memoir, calling the book insane to those closest to her and saying that it’s full of lies. Despite there being many untruths in her eyes, Kendall does defend her father, saying that the stuff he is incorrect about probably wasn’t malicious and just the way that he remembered things.
11. Your very own business at what cost to humanity?
The one thing that these Jenner sisters are not exactly great at is figuring out exactly how their business actions will be perceived by the public. We’ll talk about Kendall’s ridiculous Pepsi commercial elsewhere in this list, but for now, we want to focus on Kylie’s “Kylie Hair Kouture by Bellami.” Now, we’re not going to question just how much involvement she had in developing the product, but she probably approved it, and she probably knows the production process, which involved workers in Chinese sweatshops making hair extensions. The conditions these people work in are deplorable, and they’re exploited because they’ll work for next to nothing and have nobody fighting for them. Oh well, as long as all of Kylie’s fans can look wonderful, we doubt she’s losing sleep over the issue.
10. We’re sure she earned it
We’ve probably all looked back at our years in high school (or if you’re still there, at your current years) and realized just how much was completely unnecessary. If you were taught only the things you’d need to have in life and not to be a Jeopardy contestant, school would only take a couple of weeks. Well, when you’re home-schooled, you can do that kind of schedule, provided you prove to the state you can pass some basic proficiency tests. Kylie earned her high school diploma from Laurel Springs High School, but don’t go looking for their football team’s record… it’s an online school. We have a hard time believing Kris Jenner had the time to be a real teacher, and reports surfaced that Kylie spent far more time laying around the house than hitting the books. Oh well, it’s not like we’re worried she’s going to end up on the street unable to support herself. A diploma is just a piece of paper, and she has one that says “diploma,” and that’s all that counts, right?
9. They forced Kylie to tell the truth
You’d think for a couple of girls who take more selfies than almost anybody on social media that the Jenner sisters would understand just how easy it is to do a side-by-side comparison of one photo to another. Yet when Kylie went ahead and got lip injections to giver her plumper, fuller lips, she decided to lie about it as long as she possibly could. Or at least as long as it took to start filming another season of Keeping Up With the Kardashians. She even got her personal makeup artist, Rob Scheppy, to go along with her lies. When people would question him about Kylie’s suddenly thicker lips, he just said that it was achieved through lip liner and lip balm. While she has fessed up to the lips, she has never confirmed if a scar on her bottom that suddenly popped up in photos was the result of cosmetically enhancing the part that made her sister Kim so famous.
8. The most scandalous secret… if it’s true
Yeah, Kylie may be hiding information from us about just how many trips she’s made to the plastic surgeon, but when you have a sister that looks like Kendall, we can understand feeling the need to change a few things. Those rumors, however, can’t hold a candle to the one floating around for awhile now that there’s a sex tape in existence featuring Kylie and her rapper boyfriend Tyga. There were reports that he posted something of a sexual nature on his website during one of their many breakups as a warning to her, but that’s never been confirmed. Vivid Entertainment, the company known for bringing the world most celebrity sex tapes, offered the duo $10 million to do it on camera, pointing out it was what launched Kim’s career into the stratosphere, but the couple never took them up on it. If there really is a tape out there, it’s probably going to be worth far more than $10 million.
7. Keeping up the same color with the Kardashians
As most people know, Kylie and Kendall Jenner are half-sisters to Kim, Khloe, and Kourtney Kardashian. Kris Jenner is mother to all, but the youngest claim Bruce Jenner as a father while the older girls’ dad was famous OJ Simpson trial lawyer Robert Kardashian. Robert was of Armenian descent, which gave his skin a darker, more olive tone than Jenner’s English and Scottish roots. This explains why the older sisters all have a similar, darker tone than do Kylie and Kendall, naturally. However, when you’ve got to keep pace with your famous sisters, you need to look as much like them as possible, so Kendall is a regular when it comes to faking it. She doesn’t have time for tanning beds, though. She gets her bronzed look using spray tan, believing it makes her look healthier. We think she looks just fine pale, but hey, if that’s what she needs to keep up with the Kardashians.
6. Kylie has the attention span of a monkey with ADD
She’s been on a bunch of different E! Network television shows since the family took over the channel and the world ground to a halt and started watching, but according to Kylie, she doesn’t really watch those shows, and she doesn’t watch others, at least all the way through. “I don’t think I’ve ever finished a series in my life,” she told the British version of Glamour Magazine in 2016. “The last series I was watching was The People vs. O.J. Simpson. I didn’t finish it; I don’t think I will. Not that it wasn’t good — it was great; I just can’t seem to finish the series.” Being functionally unable to binge watch and finish a series is a weird condition. How many times has E! devoted days at a time to Kardashian shows? Although, in her defense, when so much of your life is about making television, does it feel like you’re at work watching it?
5. There’s a secret to those selfies looking so good
We always like westerns or movies set in the late 19th or early 20th century when taking a photo was a big deal. The whole family would gather around, and you had one chance to get it right. It was a little better when people started owning film cameras and you could fool around with a few shots. Then came the digital camera and the phone camera and with almost unlimited storage, you can take as many pics as you want. Kylie was outed not too long ago by close friend Jordyn Woods, who said when the duo poses for selfies together, it can take a while because they’ll shoot 75 to 100 photos to find the perfect “candid” and “spontaneous” moment. We’re surprised that Woods shared their little secret since Kylie was very generous to her friend on her 18th birthday, gifting her BFF with a very expensive Mercedes. We’d lie and say it always took only one photo for a ride like that.
4. Making sure nobody messes with Kendall
As you’ll probably remember, Kylie and Kendall’s sister, Kim, was briefly held hostage and robbed of jewelry in early October 2016 when she was alone in her Paris hotel room. Well, only a few weeks later, supermodel Kendall was booked for a Paris fashion show for Victoria’s Secret. The idea of going to the city her sister had such a traumatic experience in freaked out Kylie. So, did she just keep a stiff upper lip and soldier forward? Of course not. She hired a security force usually reserved for only the top couple of world leaders. The streets around The Grand Palais, where the show was taking place, were barricaded off, and all of the others models had to be dropped off since nobody was allowed to park near the show. Bomb-sniffing dogs also were on hand for the event. How did Kendall thank all of the other models for the extra inconvenience? By ignoring them. Her friend, Gigi Hadid, told a fashion magazine Kendall “wanted nothing to do with anyone” at the show.
3. The sisters are idiots when it comes to marketing
We talked about Kylie’s non-issue with having sweatshop labor make her hair extensions. It’s insensitive, and not to be outdone, Kendall took insensitivity to a whole new level when she appeared in a Pepsi commercial that publicly aired on television a total of one time. It was lambasted for trivializing protests and social activism. It was also laughable when Kendall hands a cop a Pepsi and suddenly, everyone gets along. Several weeks later, they proved they can screw things up together when they released a line of shirts featuring famous musicians like Black Sabbath and Biggie Smalls. They took already iconic shirts and simply slapped their pictures over what was already there. The girls quickly said sorry and pulled the shirts, but they really don’t want you to know about or remember that any of these marketing mistakes ever happened.
2. There’s a better way to do business
Kylie Jenner has raised a lot of eyebrows with her her line of makeup, Kylie Cosmetics. It’s made a big splash following the introduction of the Kylie Jenner Lip Kit and is expected to be a billion-dollar company within five years, but she’s going to have to work on her customer service. She’s been accused of several different kinds of sketchy business practices, including stealing packaging ideas from other cosmetics lines and releasing the same product under different names once sales start to slow. If you need any proof the company has issues, take a look at its page on the Better Business Bureau website. Of 320 reviews of the company, 176 are negative and 14 are neutral. That’s 59% non-positive. You can’t stay in business when 6 out of 10 people don’t like your company or your products.
1. Kylie is jealous she hasn’t been on Vogue’s cover
If you need any proof that sister magazines Teen Vogue and Vogue aren’t taken equally seriously in the Kardashian/Jenner household, one only needs to look at how badly Kylie wants to be on the cover of Vogue, despite the fact she’s been on the cover of Teen Vogue. Kim and Kendall have both been on the cover of Vogue, and rumor has it that Kylie has had her mother lobby for her, but there are some things even the powerful Kris Jenner can’t pull off. She was turned down when the family approached the magazine, but they offered Teen Vogue instead, which apparently left Kylie, behind closed doors, jealous and fuming with her prettier sister. At least she can say she wasn’t in the most ridiculous commercial of the year like Kendall was with that Pepsi debacle.
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