Assuming you have a girlfriend, would you ever consider leaving her for another girl? It’s human nature to desire what we consider better than what we have, and this also applies to the people in our lives. Romantic relationships are some of the most exciting human experiences, but the excitement hardly ever lasts as long as we expect it to, and the slightest boredom leads to people thinking they don’t love each other anymore.
Men who are mature enough to be in a relationship should be mature enough to understand how they work, and how feelings can be deceiving. Contrary to what most people believe, love is not a feeling, it’s far much more than that. The lovely feelings we associate with love are temporary, but a man who truly loves his girl is diligent enough to look for ways to keep these feelings alive for very long.
If you’re sure you’ve done everything you could to save your relationship but it’s still failing, you will need to end it in the most humane way possible. Do your best to let your girl understand where you’re at, and do everything you can to let her know how special she is and how she deserves a better man than you. Take the same advice and look for a girl who will complete you, one who meets every standard you have, and is super hot.
Although it’s possible to upgrade, it’s not easy. Here are 15 things you must do in order to upgrade to the girl of your dreams. Which of these do you disagree with?
15. First, Figure Out Whether You’re The Problem
Many men would love to trade in their current girlfriends with new ones who will have all the good qualities their current ones have and none of the bad ones. Since girlfriends are human beings, dreams of finding a girl with no flaws are just dreams, the kind that will probably never come true.
However, before sending your current girlfriend away, in the most humane way possible of course, you need to find out whether you are the problem. Your girl probably behaves the way she does because you are a terrible person, and you bring out the worst in her.
If indeed you are the problem and you insist on leaving her, don’t be surprised when she falls in love with a much better man than you and you end up regretting your decision. If you opt to stick with her and treat her like a queen, you might be surprised the lengths she will go to treat you like a king and transform into the girl of your dreams.
14. Consider Why You Need The Upgrade
If you have tried everything you could to make your relationship thrive but nothing seems to work, then you need to end it and upgrade. However, it’s important for you to define what an upgrade means to you, since you might get out of this relationship only to end up in a worse one.
A great place to start here would be to write a list of all the things you like about your girlfriend and all the things you don’t like. Yes, regardless of how fed up you are with her, she has some positive attributes, especially the ones which made you want to get into a relationship with her.
13. Search For Her Wherever She May Be Found
When Apple releases a new iPhone or computer, you find their most loyal customers camping outside their stores waiting for the release of the product. These customers know exactly what they want and where to find it, and they always get it, unless they get there late and find the product sold out.
If you are serious about upgrading from your current girlfriend, it’s important for you to determine the kind of girl you want and where to find her. It would be foolish to look for a girl in a bar if you don’t want a girl who drinks, or to look for one in a strip club if you want a chaste girl.
In addition, it’s not wise to look for the girl you consider an upgrade at the same place you found your current girl, since birds of a feather flock together, and you don’t want to go out with her friend.
12. Be Clear On Your Deal Breakers And Stick To Them
Unlike gadgets, which developers, designers, and manufacturers create with the current model in mind to make a better version, human beings are different, since each is unique in his or her own way. If you are serious about upgrading your current girlfriend, you are in for a difficult task, depending on the kind of girl you want.
Since it’s highly likely you want a girl who doesn’t have the flaws your current girl has (at least the ones you consider the worst), you need to be clear on your deal breakers. Having a clear mind as to what you don’t want will help you to get to your ideal girl faster and with less hassle.
The people whose relationships fail most of the time are those who get in blindly, disregarding what they can or can’t handle. Also, the men who get into relationships hoping their girlfriends will change with time learn how wrong they were when they are already deep in the relationship, and often have to break their hearts in search of better girls.
11. Find Out As Much As You Can About Her
Most girls complain how their men never listen to them, which is usually the case when she wants to talk and you seriously want to watch the game on TV. Therefore, most men end up nodding and pretending to listen, even when they’re doing things that could wait, often missing out on important information about their girlfriends.
This lack of attention is probably what landed you in the mess you are in right now, because when your girl was telling you some important stuff you weren’t listening. If you want to upgrade, you have no choice but to pay attention, especially to the details, since your next girl will reveal a lot of important information about herself early enough.
Therefore, make the effort to listen to the next girl you want to date and ask her as many questions about her as you can, especially concerning the issues you are facing in your relationship now. Your attention will truly impress your new girl and you will save yourself early enough if you aren’t ready to commit.
10. Work On Your Character
If you are sure you want a better girlfriend than the one you have now, you have no choice but to become a better man than you are now. Of course, numerous girls out there would probably meet the standards you require, but what makes you think you would meet theirs?
Your quest for the girl of your dreams has to begin with working on the “man in the mirror,” and bringing him up to the standard where such a girl would give him a few minutes to plead his case. If you have forgotten how to act like a gentleman, you need a refresher course urgently.
If you are up to the challenge, you had better continue to be the best version of yourself for life, because if you revert to your current self after a while, your new girl will leave you for a better man. This strategy is a win-win for you as well as for your future relationships.
9. Work On Your Overall Look
Most of the men suffering in relationships they would rather not be in not only give up on impressing their girlfriends in how they treat them, but they don’t bother with achieving or maintaining their physical appeal. If one of the things you don’t like in your current girlfriend is how she let herself go and you want a hottie with an angelic body, you have to put some effort on your end as well.
You don’t need to change your wardrobe if you can’t afford to, simply pay more attention to what you wear and the appropriate dress code for each event you attend together. Hygiene should be a priority for you since the average man is known to pay little attention to it, but you are stepping into a world where the average man doesn’t survive long.
8. Make A Lot Of Money
If you want to upgrade from your current girlfriend, you need to make as much money as you can in order to afford a decent life for you and your new girl. Girls who are at the level you desire to get to won’t even think about dating you if they suspect you’re broke. In addition, you will have to work truly hard to win them over if you can only manage to make ends meet, let alone being broke; therefore, you have to be on a level where you are irresistible. Sadly, or fortunately to some, wealth is a shortcut to a girl’s heart, because wealth will enable you to do things for her no one in your current financial level would.
7. Learn Her Needs
A man’s primary needs in a relationship are s*x and respect, and everybody knows that, right? Well, what are a girl’s primary needs? Before you leave your current girlfriend and go out looking for a better girl, you will need to understand what a girl’s primary needs are for you to know whether you can meet them.
Since you are already in a relationship, you have an idea of what girls want, but you have to have more than an idea to be successful with the next girl. Find out the kind of gifts you need to buy her even before you start dating her, learn how to communicate with her like the perfect gentleman, and study how to sweep her off her feet using sweet words.
As soon as you introduce yourself to the girl you want to pursue, be very attentive to her specific needs and preferences, and work towards meeting them on time and in style. If you will do this well, you should have no problem upgrading.
6. Look Beyond Her Pretty Face
If you are thinking of upgrading from your current girlfriend to a better one, one of the qualities you are definitely looking for is beauty, right? Of course, men would absolutely kill for a beautiful face on a gorgeous body, but this shouldn’t be the only thing you should be looking for in a girl.
An all-around beauty has the power to win over any man, especially those who aren’t keen to discover the kind of person she is underneath her beautiful face. Many men have made the mistake of leaving decent-looking girls of outstanding character for hot women with no personalities, only to end up regretting when it’s too late.
Don’t forget, your objective is to upgrade, not to downgrade in the name of a pretty face, since outer beauty doesn’t last, but inner beauty does. You should seek to find a girl you would love to spend a lifetime with, so you have to spend time trying to know who she truly is.
5. Don’t Pretend To Be Someone You’re Not
Are pretenders worse than murderers? According to the law, pretenders wouldn’t attract a punishment as severe as murderers would, but this doesn’t mean pretenders are good people in any way. People hate pretenders and hypocrites because of the damage they cause in relationships, since they break so many hearts and cause so much hurt.
One of the worst things you could do to a girl, or even to yourself, is to pretend to be something or someone you’re not because when she finds out who you truly are, you’ll wish you hadn’t met her. It’s better to lose a girl who couldn’t stand to be with the real you, as opposed to pretending to be someone else to please her, since the truth will eventually come out. Women love men who aren’t afraid to open up and be vulnerable to them since such intimacy shows you truly care for her.
4. Be Confident
Would you describe yourself as a confident person? If you think you are, yet no one has ever described you as confident, then it’s likely you’re not. A confident man can get almost any girl he decides to pursue because one of the defining qualities of a great man is confidence.
If you are convinced the only way to have a happy relationship is to upgrade, you will have to work on your confidence. A girl of exceptional beauty, brains, and character will never think of dating you if you’re not confident enough to approach her. The girl you want to pursue probably has several other men after her, and she’ll not pick you if the other guys prove to be more confident than you are.
The girl you want to impress knows the value a confident man will add to her life, so you have your work cut out. The fastest way to become confident is to face your fears, and no one is as familiar with them as you are.
3. Ask Your Friends And Family What They Think
When you started dating your current girl, how did your best friends and closest family members react? If she wasn’t right for you, your inner circle of friends must have attempted to change your mind about her, but obviously, you didn’t listen. The good feeling of love has a way of blinding the couple involved, where the two people don’t see any weird flaws in each other until it’s too late.
If you truly want to upgrade, go to your closest friends and family members and ask them about the type of girl who would be right for you. Of course, you might disagree with some of the things they will say about you and the person you need, but it’s important to hear them out and respect their opinions.
The people who are genuinely out for your good will help you from falling into the same trap you fell the last time, or getting into an even bigger mess. Combine their views with what you really feel and let them meet the girls you are interested in first before you get serious.
2. Get Ready To Commit
Perhaps you are one of those men out there who has done most of the things on this list, but is still struggling to find a better girlfriend. If this is your feeling, don’t lose hope just yet. It’s possible the girls you have approached assume you’re not ready to commit, perhaps judging by the mixed signals you could be sending them or making them feel as if you are in a relationship.
It’s not a good idea to go out looking for an upgrade when you’re still together with your girlfriend; you have to end the relationship first before. Also, don’t be afraid to say you’re looking to get into a serious relationship, because if you’re not specific, you’ll repel the serious girls who don’t want to waste any more time alone. As soon as you are ready to commit, you can be sure the girl of your dreams will be quick to commit to you as well.
1. Don’t Be In A Hurry
When you go out on your first date, how far would you go if your date was up for anything? You would probably want to go all the way, which is a terrible idea if want to get a better girl. If you got into your current relationship after getting intimate on the first date, you know how bad it’s turning out now and you don’t want to make the same mistake again.
The biggest problem with getting intimate too soon is the bond you create too early in the relationship, yet there’s so much you need to know about her before you remove each other’s clothes.
As soon as you sleep with her, being the gentleman you are supposed to be, you just can’t leave her and continue with your search for a new upgrade; you have to work on what you’ve started. A wise person once said, “Patience pays,” and it surely does, especially in this context.
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