Batman. The Dark Knight. The Caped Crusader. Whatever you want to call him, Batman is arguably the most famous and popular superhero there has ever been. First appearing on the pages of comic books way back in 1939, Batman has been cleaning up the streets of Gotham, as well as saving the planet, for generations now. Over the years Batman has seen a few changes, revamps, and reboots, in the comic world as well as on the big and small screens, but the core of the character has always been the same. He is Batman and he serves justice, no matter what the cost.
Because of his attitude and willingness to put himself through hell in order to stop the bad guys, it’s often easy to forget that Batman is just a man. He may be at the peak of physical and mental human condition, but Batman has no superpowers or gifts, he is just a regular man, like you and I. In a universe that is inhabited by superpowered beings, magic, and aliens, it’s hard sometimes to truly picture Batman in the middle of that. Given the fact that Batman is often seen as the most realistic superhero, here are 15 times that the Dark Knight has defied reality for no apparent reason other than ‘He’s Batman!’
15. He Beat Two Wolves With His Bare Hands…
We start our list with the age old saying of Man vs Beast. Given that Batman has fought superpowered beings, alien overlords, and other such creatures, coming face to face against a simple animal may not seem that big of a deal. But when we are talking about what is physically possible in reality, then it becomes a different matter.
While Batman is still learning the ropes to being a superhero in the comic book Batman and the Mad Monk, The Caped Crusader comes face to face with two deadly, angry, and hungry wolves. Obviously Batman engages in a fist fight with the wolves which results in Batman picking the wolves up and smashing them against a wall, not once but twice. Although this isn’t Batman’s biggest physical challenge, the fact that a man, just a normal man, can not only fend off two angry wolves but can actually lift them and throw them around is a bit beyond belief.
14. … And Then Fought A Bear As A Child
Continuing on with our Man vs Beast theme, the next entry on our list is The Bat vs a bear. If you thought that two angry wolves were bad enough, then how about a bear? Not just a bear but Batboy vs a bear.
During the 1970s, there were many strange and comical storylines involving our favorite heroes. On this occasion, master criminal Lex Luthor uses his scientific brain to turn The Dark Knight into a ten-year-old boy. Still wanting to be Batman, Batboy continues his crime fighting duties. That is until he bumps into Superman. The Man of Steel isn’t convinced that the small boy in front of him is Batman, so how does The Dark Knight prove himself? He picks a fight with a bear of course. It’s not just a ten year old boy fighting a bear that’s ridiculous, but Batboy really gives the bear a butt kicking. In reality the bear would have eaten Batboy, our at least ripped him to shreds.
13. …And Then A Shark
Just when you thought the animal kingdom was safe, Batman has a go at a shark. In the comic book The Joker’s Five Way Revenge, The Joker has escaped and is on a rampage once more. Locating one of the people that ratted him out, The Joker dangles the man over a shark tank and is ready to push him in. In comes Batman to save the day, only this time instead of stopping The Joker he bargains with him and offers to take the man’s place if The Joker lets him go. The Joker is obviously happy with this so he lets the man go… but not before handcuffing The Dark Knight and throwing him in with the deadly shark.
Batman is unprepared for the fight. Not only does he not have any weapons but he can’t even breath. Using the handcuffs, Batman manages to take care of the shark. Considering that this fight is in the water, in reality the shark would surely get the better of Batman, or at the very least cause Batman more harm than he did. We honestly think that if Batman had pulled out a can of anti-shark spray from his utility belt, that would have been more realistic!
12. Punches A God And Get’s Away With It
Batman is no stranger to fighting overpowered beings, alien overlords, and even gods. Especially within The Justice league, Batman has had to deal with some pretty powerful beings. However, on this occasion, giving the New God Orion a slap seems, to us, a step too far out of reality.
In the 1980s Cosmic Odyssey, many of Earth’s heroes, such as Superman, Green Lantern, and Batman team up with the New Gods and even Darkseid in order to stop Anti-Life, who wants to basically destroy everything. In the end, new god Forager sacrifices himself in order to save the universe. Once this is done, Orion takes it upon himself to rip into Forager and basically belittle the ultimate sacrifice he made to save everyone. All the heroes stand around and take Orion’s attitude, except one. Batman takes it upon himself to knock Orion down a peg or two and punches the New God. Although Orion was acting like a jerk and deserved to be taken care of, there is no way that an arrogant and overly powered god like Orion would let a mere mortal touch him and get away with it. In reality, Orion would have unleashed everything upon Batman until there was nothing left but his ripped cape!
11. Surviving Space
Fighting animals and New Gods may well be stretching reality a little bit, although many may argue that those feats could be pulled off by a mere mortal man. However, our next entry is something that can’t be done. Even within the realms of a comic book universe where everything and anything is seemingly possible, the fact that Batman can be in the vacuum of space without any kind of protection is just ridiculous!
In JLA: Welcome to the Working Week, Batman decides to up his training routine in order to better equip himself, which is a good thing as Batman needs to be at his peak in order to keep up with his fellow Justice League members. However, his special training programme involves a quick jump into space in order to test himself on holding his breath. Batman last 24 seconds, which may not sound like a lot, but in the vacuum of space, the lack of oxygen and pressure would have blown poor Bat’s brains out. If it wasn’t for The Martian Manhunter pulling Batman in, he would have stayed there for longer. That is Bat crazy!
10. Breaking Free From His Grave
In many movies, TV shows and comic books, it has become quite common to see people breaking out of their own graves, particularly in the zombie/vampire culture that we now find ourselves in. It may be argued that zombies and vampires have the strength to do this, but a man? We’re pretty confident in saying that freeing yourself from your own grave and going straight up through the coffin lid and then through the ground is borderline impossible. That’s for a normal grave.
For this entry, Batman has been subjected to The Joker’s new toxin, put in a straight jacket, and then buried alive with at least 600 pounds of dirt on top of him. So not only does Batman have to get out but he has to do it without all his mental faculties and physically not at his best. But of course, The Dark Knight frees himself from the straight jacket and then lifts the coffin lid and the dirt as if he was bench pressing a feather.
9. Surviving Multiple Life Threatening Injuries
Over the years Batman’s body has been subjected to some serious injuries. Not just that, but the constant battles and fights with criminals, superpowered beings, and aliens would have taken its toll by now.
Batman has been seen in need of recovery and even rehabilitation from some of his bigger battles. Wen Bane broke his back for example, Batman needed a lot of time to get over that! But even away from the crippling injuries that Batman has sustained over the years, the very nature of his job as a vigilante crime fighter would have gotten the better of him by now and he probably would have died 100 times over. That’s just on a day to day basis. Lets not forget that over the years, Batman has had his back broken more than once, he’s been shot, stabbed, drugged, beaten to a pulp and many, many more. How Batman can get out of bed in the mornings is probably the most astonishing thing about his character.
8. Saved The World With A Match
We’ve mentioned that Batman is no stranger to taking on the superpowered beings from time to time, but this entry has him take on an entire army of aliens. Not only that,but this army wiped out the whole Justice League without too much effort, which left only Batman to save the day.
In the New World Order storyline, a group of powerful beings called the Hyperclan come to Earth under the guise of superheroes. The public suddenly fall in love with the new heroes and prefer them to the Justice league. So out of curiosity, or jealousy, The Justice League go and investigate The Hyperclan and find out that they are in fact Martians using mind control over the public. A huge battle commences in which the Justice League lose and the Martians win. That is until they realize Batman is still alive. With some matches and gasoline, Batman sets a fire to end the Martian invasion. Although Batman would know The Martians weakness for fire, it’s still amazing that one man could take down this overpowered army when the likes of Superman, Wonder Woman, The Flash, and The Green Lantern all failed.
7. Survived Darkseid’s Omega Beams
Speaking of over powered aliens, none come more powerful and more dangerous than the alien overlord Darkseid. The Dark Knight has faced off against Darkseid on several occasions and more often than not, Batman comes out on top. On several occasions, Batman has managed to best Darkseid, and not only that, but he has also proved more agile than any of his fellow superheroes in dodging the deadly Omega Beams that Darkseid shoots from his eyes. Not even Superman and The Flash can out run those beams and yet, Batman can dodge them with ease with a swift backflip or two.
The most famous face off between these two is when Darkseid killed Batman. In the ultimate showdown, Batman breaks his one rule in order to stop the overlord. He takes a gun and fires it to kill Darkseid. Unfortunately for him it only wounds Darkseid so Batman gets the full force of his Omega Beams and is seemingly killed. But this is Batman so of course he doesn’t die. Instead, he is conveniently placed back in time and lives to fight another day. Only Batman could have done this and we’re still not sure how he does it.
6. Superhuman Strength
The number one thing that everyone knows about The Dark Knight is that he is just a man. He may well be at the peak of physical condition and trains himself to withstand so much, but he is still a man. Unlike the heroes like Captain America, who has enhanced human abilities thanks to a super serum, Batman doesn’t have enhanced anything. He can only do what is physically possible in human terms.
With that in mind, it has become more and more unrealistic at just how strong Batman is. Forgetting his gadgets and Batsuits, Batman has been known to throw men around as if they were confetti, take on superpowered beings in a hand-to-hand combat, and there have also been times when Batman has held up buildings before they come crashing down. The fact is that Batman’s persona has become so great that it seems like any feats of physical strength are possible by him and then they are just passed off as something Batman could have always done. This just won’t do!
5. Age Doesn’t Slow Him Down
Old age catches up with the best of us. No matter who you are, there isn’t any escape from father time. Of course, in the world of comic books old age can be bypassed; especially with the many reboots and revamps of our favorite heroes, they can seemingly stay in their prime for as long as possible. However, sometimes the comic book writers want to inject some reality in the pages and write stories of the heroes as older people. Wolverine, Superman, and Batman are some of the few to get an older version of themselves. As far as Wolverine and Superman go, they still have their powers, so the old age thing isn’t such a big deal, but in the brilliantly critically acclaimed Dark Knight Returns, Bruce Wayne comes out of retirement to clean up the streets of Gotham once more.
Wayne, now in his 50s, doesn’t seem to take too much effort to become Batman once more. Even if we overlook the fact that after years of crime fighting, an elderly Bruce Wayne would probably be in a wheelchair or at least have some kind of disability from everything he has put his body through. Apart from that, the older Bruce Wayne still kicks some serious butt as well as going up against The Man of Steel once again. In reality, the old man would have just crumbled against his latest foes.
4. Psychological Breakdown
In real life, it doesn’t take too much to affect the mental health of many people. With personal issues, the world we live in, wars, and many other day to day problems, the mental health of people is a fragile thing. So when we look at the character of Batman, it’s hard to imagine that he hasn’t been driven completely insane by the things he’s been through, seen, and done.
Of course, Bruce Wayne first put on the Batsuit because he witnessed his parents’ murder right in front of him. Not the greatest start to a healthy grown up life. But when you consider the world in which Batman inhabits, many “crazy” and psychotic villains, alien invasions, and apocalyptic disasters on a weekly basis, all of this should have weighed far too heavy on Batman’s mind. If none of these did, then what happened to Jason Todd really should have broken The Dark Knight mentally and in reality, Batman would be enjoying a long stretch in Arkham Asylum!
3. Taking Down Any Justice League Members At Will
We are all well aware that Batman is a strategic genius and no matter what is going on in the universe, Batman will have a plan to stop it. Even if we take that as fact and buy into a reality in which one man has that much intelligence and foresight, it’s still very unrealistic the amount of times that Batman has taken out his fellow superheroes without too much effort.
On many occasions and in various story arcs, Batman has had to deal with his fellow Justice League members and stop them. There are many examples of this but in Batman: Confidential, Batman is forced into a face off with Aquaman, Green Lantern, and Martian Manhunter. Batman quickly defeats them all which just suspends whatever reality the writers are trying to create. Either Batman is so great that nothing and no one can ever stop him or the other Justice League members just aren’t strong enough to stop Batman, even though they all have superpowers. Whichever way you look at it, Batman always comes out on top against his fellow superheroes and this in itself is unrealistic.
2. Every Time Batman Has Fought Superman And Won
Now we come to our number 2 entry on the list of unrealistic things Batman has done. Before everyone starts shouting at the screen that Batman is a tactical genius and always uses his intellect to outsmart The Man of Steel, let’s just put all of this into reality for a moment.
Batman and Superman have faced off against each other many times over the years and in many different forms and mediums. However, most of the time the outcome seems to be the same. The Dark Knight triumphs! Yes, Batman usually has some Kryptonite in hand and it may be argued that Superman never really gives it his all in these battles as he doesn’t want to kill Batman, but even away from that, Superman would stop Batman a lot quicker and efficiently in real life. Even with his gadgets and highly powered Batsuits, Batman wouldn’t stand a chance against The Man of Steel. He may get lucky but eventually Superman would easily contain Batman and put an end to one of his tantrums. Out of the many things on this list, every time Batman beats Superman we feel this is always the most unrealistic thing about The Dark Knight.
1. Because I’m Batman!
Now we come to the number one thing that Batman always does, and no matter what happens and what he achieves, it never needs to be explained fully because after all, he’s Batman!
Over the years no other superhero or even character from fiction has grown to such iconic levels as Batman, that he can now seemingly do anything. The myth that surrounds The Dark Knight has become so great that he has almost risen to god-like status without having any powers at all. This is all well and good, and if we’re honest no other hero deserves this honor more than Batman, but this alone is what is destroying Batman. The whole appeal and reason that Batman has lasted for so many years is because he is just a man. He may get thrown into the superpowered world from time to time, but essentially, he is a man that wants to end crime in his city. Everything that happens around that is just making Batman more and more unrealistic as a character and his abilities become laughable. Batman is the hero for the people and he should stay that way.
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