You don’t need to be told that the Kardashians and Jenners are some of the most controversial people in fame. They have as many rabid fans as they do extreme haters, and this has translated to a big money-maker for the whole clan. You can barely turn around without seeing a news story, an app, a product endorsement, or even one of their own product lines.
Given that they live just about their whole lives on television, it’s no surprise that every part of their lives is documented. You can find out anything you want to about them, as well as some things that you almost certainly don’t want to know. And, naturally, you can find out a lot of things that they have said in the past. It’s all out there, whether recorded in print or on television coverage, whether they should have said it or not.
Over the years, every single member of the family has said something that they doubtless regret. Sometimes they have been cruel, even to one another. Sometimes they have made predictions that turned out wrong, or professed undying love to a significant other who later escaped their orbit. And sometimes they say something so stupid you can barely believe it left their mouths.
We’ve put together a collection of the 15 dumbest things ever said by a Kardashian or a Jenner. Hold onto your hats: we’re about to make Jessica Simpson look like a Pulitzer prize winner, and that’s not easy to do.
15 “I Could Maybe Hit It Better If They Were Black Balls”
Khloe Kardashian came out with this little gem when she was talking about how to play golf better. Needless to say, she absolutely knew what she was saying when these words left her mouth. In fact, Khloe has chosen to base a large part of her public persona around her love for black men (as have a few of her sisters). Coming from a group of people who see no problems with objectifying their own bodies, perhaps it’s no surprise that Khloe loves to objectify an entire skin colour. She manages to make herself sound pretty dumb while doing it, too. That’s not how golf works, Khloe. You obviously want neon coloured balls, because they stand out better when you manage to hit them so far in the wrong direction that they land in a pond or the undergrowth. Turning it into a tacky pun doesn’t make you look smarter or better at golf.
14 “I Honestly Hate Wearing Makeup”
While it is by no means stupid in itself to dislike wearing make-up, there are certain people who really shouldn’t be expressing that opinion. Someone who has their own make-up line would be number one in that category. Why would Kylie turn around and say she doesn’t like make-up when she’s trying to sell it? It wasn’t just the one time, either – she has expressed this thought a number of times and in different ways. Considering that Kris Jenner usually keeps a tight rein on the family brand, it’s surprising that she let one of her younger daughter speak like this. But then again, this is the same girl who claimed not to have lip fillers, then admitted she had lip fillers, and finally sold lipstick on the basis of girls being able to get lips like hers (even though she achieved that with lip fillers instead of make-up). So, it seems like you can get away with saying just about anything when you’re a celebrity with your own product line.
13 “I Think South Is So Stupid. It's The Stupidest Thing Ever”
Oh, Kim. To be fair, she does do the most talking in public, so it’s probably not a surprise that we have the most quotes from her too. But what was she thinking? The full quote reads, "North has a better direction. I don't think we'll go with another direction. I think South is so stupid. It's the stupidest thing ever." It was a reaction to being asked if she was going to call her new baby South West, as an accompaniment to first child North West. Apparently, it makes total sense in Kim’s world that naming a child after one compass direction is normal and acceptable, while naming them after another, similar direction would just be totally stupid. We obviously stand corrected, because it kind of seems like each of them is equally as stupid as the other. The good news is that at least they didn’t actually go with South.
12 “I Rented My Mom A Monkey For The Week…”
Another titbit from Kim, the full quote reads: "I rented my mom a monkey for the week because she had a syndrome where she missed children in the house." Not only is this another of the boundless examples of the Kardashians having more money than sense, it’s also a pretty dumb thing to say. Why would getting a monkey be a good replacement for her children, many of whom are already adults? Surely Kris isn’t shallow enough to be satisfied with just having anything in the house? Is Kim aware that she seems to have invented a new syndrome, as well as a cure for it? How would a monkey help if it was only around for a week and then was taken away again? Did she really do this? Did she really think it would work? There are so many questions about this that the mind just boggles.
11 “Don't Go Into The Ocean While On Your Period Because A Shark Is Going To Attack You”
Oh no, Khloe, not again… yep, she made a bit of a blunder of herself when she came out with this statement. She sounds as though she is channelling Anchorman’s Brick Tamland with this one. She is being pretty melodramatic with this statement, which has been pretty thoroughly debunked by science. Women who get attacked by sharks don’t tend to be proportionately more on their periods, and sharks can’t really smell blood a mile away anyway. And on top of all that, a period isn’t really composed of blood, at least not in the same sense as the blood that would come out if you cut your arm or leg. It’s composed of a lot of different elements, just one of which is blood – and all the others could mask the smell for the shark. So, for those of you who are male and could be excused for not realizing, that’s why this is a dumb thing to say.
10 “I Just Want To Inspire My Fans To Be Whoever They Want To Be...That's What I've Always Done”
Kylie is really the queen of saying things that she should not have said. Just take this example. She was quoted as saying, “I just want to inspire my fans to be whoever they want to be, because that’s what I’ve always done.” That’s kind of sweet, right? It’s nice that she would want her fans to be themselves. But then on the other hand, it turns out she’s not exactly leading by example. She also said, “I’m not myself on Snapchat or Instagram. That’s totally not me.” So, just to be clear, Kylie wants to make everyone follow their example of being themselves, but the self that she shows everyone is not her actual self, so we’re supposed to follow the example of the self that we don’t see because it only exists off-camera. Okay, then. Whatever you want to say, Kylie, you just go ahead and make yourself look dumber.
9 “I Am Armenian, So Of Course I Am Obsessed With Laser Hair Removal”
This quote comes from Kim Kardashian, the social media leader of the family and the one person we have undoubtedly seen the most of. We mean that both in terms of quantity and nakedness. One look at any of Kim’s famous nude snaps will tell you that yes, she really is a fan of laser hair removal, and doesn’t appear to have it anywhere other than her head. But that’s not where the stupidity comes from in this quote. We’re pretty sure that you don’t have to be Armenian to become obsessed with laser hair removal; nor are Armenians particularly known for their patronage of the laser hair removal industry. In fact, it’s fair to say that it’s probably really just Kim and her sisters who are making this trend well-known for those of their heritage. Who knows where she gets these kinds of comments from, especially since she’s grown up in the USA for her whole life.
8 “He Just Seemed Very Firm About The Change, And That's, Like, His Motto”
Surely anyone can guess who Kim Kardashian was talking about here, and under what circumstances… isn’t it obvious that this is her version of a ringing political endorsement? Yes, this is Kim’s reaction to having had a dinner with Obama while he was running for election the second time around. It’s the reason she gave for voting for him. The facepalms just come hard and fast with this one. It’s nice to think that the younger generations can get political news from their idols, without having to have it dumbed down. If you can’t sense the sarcasm dripping from that statement, you might want to start paying a bit more attention – something that we would also advise for Kim. Given her and Kanye West's conflicting statements concerning the recent election of President Trump, she apparently hasn’t learned anything over the course of Obama’s presidency. Role models like these need to work harder at their approach.
7 “A Lot Of Adults Don’t Think It's Their Place To Interfere With Kids. I Interfere All The Time”
Khloe Kardashian obviously really didn’t know what she was saying when she opened her mouth to utter this one. That’s what we are hoping and praying, anyway. We have our fingers crossed that she meant to say she was fine with stepping in to tell off an unruly child, or to take a hand in the raising of her nieces and nephews. That would be a whole lot better than what it sounds like she meant. Given that she is prone to making innuendos all the time, we can’t believe she didn’t spot this one before it was too late. Maybe she should stop playing parent to other peoples’ kids until she can have the presence of mind to have a filter on what she is saying. Meanwhile, we’re just going to go cringe in a corner and fail to be able to even look at a photograph of Khloe until we forget about her saying that.
6 "What Is Corned Beef?"
This special little quote comes from a conversation between Khloe and Kourtney Kardashian. They brought everything down to a whole new level when they were caught talking on camera. Let’s just say that it wasn’t the best display of intelligence that the world has ever seen. Khloe started it off by asking, "What is corned beef?" Kourtney chipped in to say, "It's raised next to corn." As if this wasn’t bad enough, Khloe had to bite back with an opinion of her own. She replied, "No it's not. It's an animal that's only allowed to eat corn." It’s probably a good job that they’re rich enough to hire their own cooks, because there’s no way you would trust anything that they put down in front of you to eat if that’s what they thought. This really does have to go down in history as amongst the stupidest things ever said on reality TV – and as you can see from this selection alone, there’s a lot of rivalry for the title.
5 “The Hardest Part About Being A Woman Is Finding The Right Clothes To Wear”
This would be something that you could just brush off as silly if one of the Kardashian girls who said it. But it wasn’t Kim, or Khloe, or even Kourtney. No, this quote came from the mouth of Caitlyn Jenner. That’s right, Caitlyn has managed to insult both all of the biological women in the world and all of the transgender women in the world. Picking out clothes is a very long way from being the hardest part of womanhood, and it’s only due to Caitlyn’s privileged position that she would even think about saying this. Discrimination, male violence, inequality in the workplace, social pressures, hormonal changes, lack of representation – all of these are problems facing women around the world which are a hell of a lot more troubling than finding the right outfit. Get a grip, Caitlyn, before you manage to lose all of the goodwill gained from the courage to be yourself.
4 “I’m Going To Teach You A New Spanish Word Every Day, From My Mexican Heritage”
Get ready to feel your head hit the desk as you read the next part of this quote from Kris Jenner. What she said, in full, was: “I’m going to teach you a new Spanish word every day, from my Mexican heritage. I’m not Mexican, but I’ve been there.” Alright, Kris. So, visiting somewhere gives you heritage from there, huh? Well, that explains why her kids have been accused of cultural appropriation on multiple occasions, then – such as Kylie’s cornrows and Khloe’s choice to wear Native American headgear. The worst part of all this is that the quote is taken from a conversation with Scott Disick. Apparently, she forgot who she was talking to, because he was quick to remind her that he had also been to Mexico… at the same time as she was, because they went together. It takes a special kind of stupid to come out with a statement like that.
3 “This Year Is About Realizing Stuff”
When Kylie put out a special video to open 2016, she made an interesting statement. She said, confusingly, “I feel like every year has a new energy, and I feel like this year is about, like, the year of just realizing stuff, and everyone around me, we’re all just like realizing things. 2016. Looking good.” Um, what? Did you want to repeat that again? Here’s where it gets even more confusing – the video was posted under the heading ‘My 2016 Resolutions’. All we can gather from this is that Kylie’s new year resolution was to realize stuff. As far as 2016 actually turned out, this may well have been the evil omen that kicked it all off. We certainly did realize a few home truths, mostly about how much the year sucked overall. Thanks for the great insight, Kylie, you really hit it out of the park with this one.
2 “It’s Crazy To Think North West Can Already Read Better Than Kendall Jenner”
If you read this statement from one of the sisters, you would probably think that they were just playfully throwing shade instead of being serious about Kendall’s IQ. But the fact of the matter is, it was actually Kendall Jenner who said this, and that’s just sad. It appears that she thinks that being stupid is cool, which is incredibly stupid in itself. Here’s hoping that that message isn’t getting passed down to the younger members of the family with statements like this. And what exactly was she trying to achieve with a statement like this? Does she want everyone to think that she can’t read? Why would that be something to brag about? One thing’s for sure, Kendall didn’t think this through before she opened her mouth, which is a real shame. It’s never good when someone who serves as a role model to younger people makes out like not studying or being smart is being cool, especially when impressionable minds are paying attention.
1 “I Gave Birth. I Know Who The Dad Was"
Kris Jenner wanted to set the record straight about Khloe Kardashian, and the rumours that she does not share the same father with the other Kardashian siblings. There has long been conjecture about the fact that Khloe looks slightly different to the others, and that she has gone on record as saying that she didn’t feel as though she fit in as a child. So, Kris went on Good Morning America in 2012 and gave the above statement. Which… yeah. Being the person who gave birth to your child only proves that you are the mother. It proves nothing at all about the father. In fact, there was another act that Kris actually was present for which would have proven more conclusively who the father was, but she chose to mention this one instead. It’s another case of a Jenner speaking without thinking about what they are going to say first.