15 Jokes In Shrek That Weren't For Kids

Computer-animated films are a thing now and Pixar has provided us with some of the best films in recent history. Most of the films from Pixar is intended for younger audiences though and adults looking for computer-animated fun might have to look elsewhere for a few laughs. Lucky for them, DreamWorks Animations’ Shrek is quite the funny series.

First starting out in 2001, Shrek tells the story of a heroic, disgusting and short-fused chamber named Shrek. He’s just a huge green ogre who loves to be in his swamp. In his journey that spans across 4-films; with another film planned for 2019 or 2020, Shrek is joined by a likeable cast of characters including Donkey, Puss and his love interest, Princess Fiona.

The series is made to cater to a more mature audience as compared to films from Pixar. But let’s face it, we were still keen on watching the films when we were kids. Since we were young and innocent, a few jokes might’ve passed us by. Here are 15 dirty jokes from Shrek you might’ve missed.

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15 The Gingerbread Man Torture

One of the most prominent supporting characters in the Shrek films is the Gingerbread Man. This is a big deal because there are a ton of other characters to compete with and what makes the Gingerbread Man so memorable is just that he’s a really fun character to look at.

This literal piece of bread brought to life gets into all sorts of trouble. Back in the first film, Lord Farquaad caught Gingerbread Man and he began torturing him by dunking him in a glass of milk. This is a rather funny scene but the truth behind it is rather grim.

In 2000, one of the controversies that plagued the US government is that it was allegedly using waterboarding as a form of torture during interrogation. In Lord Farquaad’s method, he uses milk. So shall we call it milk boarding then?

14 Donkey’s Special Tail

The best love team in all the Shrek movies isn’t Shrek and Fiona’s relationship. Ask any fan and they’ll likely pick Dragon and Donkey’s team up as the best love team in the series. As early as the first film, the budding romance of the pair took a weird turn and in recent films, they even have children.

When the pair first met, it was obvious that Donkey wasn’t too keen on having a literal dragon as his partner in life. Dragon had other intentions though as for her, Donkey was the one she wanted for the rest of her life.

While checking out Donkey, Dragon, of course, had to see “the goods” first. During the check up, Dragon might’ve gone a bit too far as Donkey says, “that’s my personal tail, you’re going to tear it off!”

13 Lord Farquaad’s Name

The somewhat leader and big baddie in all of Duloc is Lord Farquaad. It’s easy to hate this very annoying character and we wouldn’t blame viewers for wanting to see him fail miserably. What kind of monster tortures Gingerbread Man and exiles all other fairy tale creatures?

Lord Farquaad’s main quality is that he is a total pr*ck. He is the bad guy after all. His name already reveals a lot about his personality though and the joke may have gone over our heads when we first heard it. Say Farquaad several times. After that, remove the R and say it several times again. Sounds familiar?

Without the R, his name sounds very close to F***wad. A fitting name for such an evil person. We were young and less witty back then so taking out the R from the name could’ve been a not-so-obvious thing to do.

12 The Bachelorettes Of Duloc

Since Shrek does include a ton of fairy tale characters in its story, you can bet that it includes some of the most prominent fairy tale princesses in history. In the story, most of the princesses are bachelorettes and you can bet that Lord Farquaad is looking to get his small hands on them.

Back in the first film, Lord Farquaad is seen talking to the Magic Mirror about who the fairest princess is in all of Duloc. The candidates include Cinderella, Sleeping Beauty, Princess Fiona, and Snow White.

For Snow White, the Magic Mirror quips that Snow White is “a cape-wearing girl from the Land of Fantasy, although she lives with seven other men, she’s not easy.” This should’ve been an easy joke to spot but alas, the innocence of youth kept us from noticing.

11 Lord Farquaad’s Castle Is Compensating For Something

In the first Shrek film, our favorite ogre and Donkey budding friendship takes them to the home of the many fairy-tale characters, Duloc. After being exiled from Duloc, the characters began swarming towards Shrek’s swamp. At the root of the issue is the small but terrible Lord Farquaad.

Lord Farquaad is a rich man and he’s, of course, the richest in all of Duloc. As seen from his humongous castle, the lord isn’t too shy about spending his money. When Shrek and Donkey first saw the castle, the pair initially thought that the castle was big. Shrek then says “do you think maybe he’s compensating for something?”

This, of course, was a joke that’s based towards jokes guys and gals make when they see another person who has a huge car in real life. A bigger car means smaller privates is the logic. What makes the joke funnier is that Lord Farquaad turned out to be literally small.

10 Welcoming Act In Duloc

One of the best scenes in the first Shrek film is when Donkey and Shrek first set foot in Duloc. The area was huge and there were quite a few fairy-tale characters in the background. It was basically what we imagine when thinking about the towns and villages from storybooks. The only difference is the welcoming act visitors of Duloc first see.

Upon getting inside the town, Shrek and Donkey are welcomed by a few performing puppets that began singing and dancing. Their lyrics were: “please keep off the grass, shine your shoes, wipe your…face”. Before saying face, the puppets were bending and showing their behinds.

What rhymes with grass and is another word for buttocks? We didn’t know then but we do now. It would’ve been funny hearing this line for the first time but alas, it was a good joke we passed by.

9 Robin Hood Wants To Get What?

Princess Fiona is a magnet for trouble and she needs rescuing every once in awhile. With the series’ filled to the brim with heroes from fairy tales and folk tales of yore. One of the popular characters making an appearance in the first film is Robin Hood and his band of Merry Men.

After helping out Princess Fiona, Robin Hood and his friends began breaking into a song and dance number. It started out as an innocent wooing of Princess Fiona but it ended on a rather dirty note. The song starts with Robin Hood singing, “I like an honest fight and a saucy little maid.” It was followed by his Merry Men singing, “what he’s basically saying is he likes to get...” but before finishing, Robin Hood buts in and shouts “paid!” It doesn’t take a genius to know that the Merry Men were about to say laid.

8 When Shrek Was A Man

For the most part of the series, Shrek moves around as the green ogre we know him to be. In Shrek 2, we get to see what Shrek would look like as a man and to be honest, he’d make a fine human. He was so fine, a few ladies who saw him were instantly smitten.

There were three ladies who saw Shrek the first day he was a human. Since he got smaller in size, his clothes were too big and his pants fell down. The three ladies swooned over the human Shrek when they saw him naked.

Shrek was in a state of shock at first so the maidens decided to calm him by rubbing his shoulders. The one remaining woman said she had "nothing left to rub" since the other two had Shrek’s shoulders occupied already. We all know what she wanted to rub.

7 Lord Farquaad's Alone Time

Lord Farquaad loves his princesses. Out of all the bachelorettes in Duloc, it’s Princess Fiona that’s his favorite. Back when Princess Fiona was still stuck in her castle; and when her ogre side was still unknown, Lord Farquaad had to use other means to satisfy his… longing for the ogre princess.

Whenever Lord Farquaad wanted to see one of his “brides-to-be” he simply asked his trusty Magic Mirror to give him a look. In one particular scene, the small ruler was all alone in his room, he asks his Magic Mirror to project a picture of Princess Fiona. From the look on the Magic Mirror’s face, it was obvious that Lord Farquaad is about to do something with Princess Fiona’s picture and his alone time. It’s one of the most obvious dirty jokes in the entire series and we weren’t sure how it got past us.

6 OJ Simpson And COPS Reference

Shrek 2 is one of the best entries in the series for a few reasons, one of it is the fact that we got to see Shrek in human form and Donkey as an amazing Stallion in said scene. In one particular part of the movie, Shrek, Donkey, and Puss were hunted down by knights. The sequence was an obvious call out to a few things.

For starters, we get to see Shrek being chased by knights. He was literally riding a white Bronco and this is a subtle reference to OJ Simpson’s car chase. The show itself was presented like COPS but in this case, it was titled as KNIGHTS. The show was complete with a shaky camera POV so there’s no doubting that the writers made a call out to the popular show.

5 High On Frankincense And Myrrh

Throughout the 4 films, DreamWorks Animations got a little too giddy with the subtle adult jokes they added to the films and the topics of these jokes range from sex to drugs. In Shrek The Third, one particular scene depicts how the people in Shrek’s world get high.

In one scene, Shrek and company come across a carriage that’s seemingly smoking from the inside. A few moments later, one of the passengers comes out looking way too happy and relaxed. He speaks with a very familiar accent complete with “bro” as he asks his friend not to burn all the frankincense and myrrh. And in the second film, Puss was caught carrying catnip during the KNIGHTS chase scene.

4 Pinocchio’s Unconventional Kink

Out of the many supporting characters; most of which are based on fairytales, one of the most popular is Pinocchio. We all know who Pinocchio is. A wooden doll brought to life by the wishes of an old man who wants to have a real son. The particular quirk of Pinocchio is that his nose grows whenever he lies.

In Shrek 2, Pinocchio gets the chance to be a hero. However, his nose has to grow first before everyone can escape and live. At first, Pinocchio says that he wears ladies’ underwear, his nose remains the same. This means that whatever he said was true. In a last ditch effort to get his nose to grow, Pinocchio says that he DOESN'T wear ladies’ underwear and only then does his nose grow by a few inches. We’d rather NOT know why Pinocchio’s nose grew when he said that.

3 Donkey And Puss’ Trippy Experience

Starting at the first film, we already got to see the budding bromance of Donkey and Shrek. When Shrek 2 was released, the pair was joined by yet another friend, Puss. The trio gets into all sorts of adventures with each other and they’ve revealed quite the bond throughout the years.

In Shrek The Third, Donkey and Puss get into a whole new kind of adventure. After a mishap, the two switched bodies with each other. This was, of course, a very weird experience for both parties but Donkey’s been through other trippy experiences before.

While in Puss’ body, Donkey comments that “I haven’t been on a trip like that since college.” This is a subtle joke referencing to the fun times the adult viewers had while in college. The kids were yet to know about this psychedelic fun times though so the joke went above their heads.

2 Down The Waffle Hole

Shrek Forever After had one of the most fun storylines in the series. In the fourth film, Shrek wished that he never existed. Once granted, no one in the world knew who he was. This includes his wife Fiona, his best friends Puss and Donkey and so much more.

In the alternate world where Shrek doesn’t exist, Fiona becomes the leader of an ogre resistance. Shrek and Fiona’s meet-up wasn’t all too good though. Donkey fell into a waffle trap set by the resistance and he was seemingly caught by the ogre resistance.

When Shrek was first trying to ask the resistance to free Donkey, he was met by the resistance leader, Fiona. In one of the many sexual innuendos in the film, Shrek says “my donkey fell in your waffle hole!” The look on Fiona’s face shows that even she found the term dirty.

1 Like An Ass

A fan favorite in the series is definitely Donkey. The character voiced by Eddie Murphy has been the source of fun and laughter during a ton of occasions and people just can’t get enough of this wacky four-legged creature. His species is more often than not the source of unintentional ridicule for himself.

In Shrek 2, Donkey begins drinking a potion. After which he asks Puss if he looks any different. Puss replied by saying that “you still look like an ass to me.” Technically, Donkey is an ass so he can’t complain when the others call him that and there are a few occasions when he was made fun of because of this. We might’ve not gotten the joke as kids but once we grew up, we knew why being called an ass isn’t exactly a good thing all the time.

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