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15 Confessions From Gamer Girls That Are Making Us Sweat

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15 Confessions From Gamer Girls That Are Making Us Sweat

I don’t know how many of you still use the Whisper app. I’ll be totally honest, I didn’t know that it existed before I started doing this article. That being said, I realized that I had seen and read plenty of pics from Whisper without knowing that that’s where they all came from. So…yay I learned something new.

Anyway, Whisper has a pretty wide variety of users. But there is an exciting group that definitely gets some pretty big hits there. That group is the “gamer girl” group. Of course, they’re not actually formed into a group and a lot of them hate being called gamer girls, but there are many of them and they have some pretty interesting things to say.

Some of those things can really get a guy sweating. For a few reasons though. Not just for fun and naughty reasons. No, there are some whispers that genuinely would make you sweat in terror. Do you like Pokemon GO? What if you lost all of those little critters you spent so long hunting? Are you working through a few games on your PlayStation right now? What if all of that memory was deleted? Be careful with these gamer girls. Their whispers will make you sweat!

16. She Owns You. Just Accept It.

Now, this is some turning of the tables here. It’s been so typically, since the dawn of video games, that guys had the privilege of playing and girls had the privilege of watching and prepping lunch and so on. I actually know someone who had a boyfriend who was that asshole. So it’s nice to see things go the other way on this one. I know someone who had a girlfriend who would play video games all day and he would go about his work around the house, cuddle with her occasionally, and make sure she stayed fed. That’s a pretty damn decent relationship going on there. I think the point is here, don’t assume that your gamer girl is going to do everything for you. You better be ready to do a few things for her. And don’t keep her waiting…seems like she could get cranky without her sandwich.

15. Of Course His Face Lit Up! It’s Cosplay!

Alright, so here’s the thing…of course, this guy’s face lit up when his girlfriend mentioned she wants to start doing cosplay. He doesn’t need to be a huge anime dork or gamer to enjoy that! The boyfriend never said anything about dressing up himself. He’s just happy to have a girlfriend who is willing to get dolled up into any number of over-sexualized characters from the video game/anime world. There aren’t many ways to go wrong there. And he’s probably thinking that cosplay will turn into roleplay which will make his animes and video games come to life in a way that he never imagined they could. If there’s any reason to sweat here it’s likely because of your own wish to have a girlfriend like that who would bring all of your nerdy fantasies to life.

14. Don’t Piss This Gamer Girl Off

All I can say is that it’s a really good thing that The Sims isn’t like any sort of voodoo game. Otherwise, it looks like there would be a lot of people in for some real trouble. That being said, there is an awful lot of divorce and depression in the United States…maybe this gamer girl has got some hidden powers we didn’t know about. All the more reason to start sweating about it, and hope you don’t piss her off. Because if you do, you’re going to end up with a loving family, having a great time before everything comes crumbling down in front of your eyes, while she sits laughing at your misfortune from her computer screen. Now, be honest, how many of you are actually paranoid about this being a real thing now? Be honest!

13. Is This Hot…Or Really Not?

I don’t know how many of you really know much about the relationship between Harley Quinn and the Joker, but it’s kind of messed up. And when I say “kind of”, I mean it’s well and truly twisted. Remember that the Joker managed to score Harley only because he managed to turn his psychiatrist into a completely psychotic slave. Now, maybe some of you guys out there are really into that idea. And if that’s the case, well hey Mr. Weinstein, I hope you’re doing well. I know this whisper is just about roleplaying, but I still can’t imagine that either one of the players would be able to walk away without some pretty significant wounds. It doesn’t seem like there’s such a thing as a safe roleplay of Harley Quinn and the Joker…

12. Pimpin’ Is Easy Apparently

Alright…this is pathetic, surprising, and sort of illegal…Any man who is willing to use his girlfriend to seduce both men AND boys in order to get achievements on his Xbox is just a very pathetic nerd who needs to understand that he should want his girlfriend to seduce him…not other people. That same person should also realize that seducing boys is probably pretty illegal even if it is over Xbox Live. I’m sorry, but that’s just the way it is. Something about underage boys being lured in by an adult woman (while that may sound appealing to some of you sickos) is just very illegal. What seems even stranger though is that this girl seems not to mind it. That emoji at the end seems to suggest that she has fun with it…which probably makes things even more illegal. The NSA might be listening…start sweating.

11. That’s One Way To Use That Function

Ok…so I’m very glad that my sister is a gamer who owns her own systems and controllers and lives in a different place than me. Otherwise, this whisper might worry me. And I bet it’s worrying a whole bunch of you now! I’m sure it’s exciting some of you for reasons that are kind of disturbing, but maybe you don’t have a sister and are excited by the idea that your friend’s sister is playing around with an Xbox controller in a way it wasn’t made to be. That could be fair enough. Either way, I’m sure many of you brothers out there will now be sterilizing your controllers before every use. And I wouldn’t blame you at all. On the other hand, though, I know you’re going to have some really weird friends who are really going to want to hold on to the controller your sister uses…

10. Don’t Cheat On A Gamer Girl And Leave Your Phone Out

I’ve never been able to get into the whole Pokemon thing. I think it’s pointless and makes no sense whatsoever, but there are a lot of people who seem to really get into it. Pokemon GO has been a huge hit with so many gamers around the world. And hey, at least it’s getting people outside for some exercise. Sometimes those idiots walk into traffic to catch a pokemon, but at least there’s some exercise. Anyway, there’s a gamer girl out there who really dug deep into her soon-to-be ex-boyfriend’s gaming hours and released all of the pokemon that he had gathered in GO. To be fair to her, the guy cheated on her. Pretty sure most people would that find that a completely fair way to get back at him. It probably gets her point across. Especially since it seems he only has time for other girls and Pokemon.

9. Some Gamer Girls Really Can Kick Butt

This is something that most gamer guys thought would probably never happen to them, but it almost always does when they come across a serious gamer girl. Guys seem to think that they are just naturally good at kicking ass in video games. Sure, video games have historically been marketed to men more than women, but it’s not like games were all colour-coded blue for boys and pink for girls. But that’s not the point here. The point is that guys typically treat girls like they can’t game at all…but there are gamer girls out there who can simply just destroy whole groups of guys in all sorts of games. The best is to watch a gamer girl waste a group of gamer guys in Call of Duty. Hilarious. Oh, and this Whisper is awesome because Megan Fox shows up too!

8. Fatality. Flawless Victory.

Ok…there are a bunch of things wrong with this. First off, when you defeat someone in Mortal Kombat their soul is sucked up by the main villain. So, this is already a very strange thing to be doing in the bedroom. Also, how old is this guy? Is he a man-child? He must be in a frat or something. There’s something just really weird about yelling out to your roommates while you’re railing your girlfriend so that they can tell you to “finish her”. It’s a good thing that this gamer girl thinks it’s cute because I can imagine yelling out “Mortal Kombat” in the middle of a romp being a huge turn off for a lot of ladies. This guy is lucky. A very strange and messed up guy. But lucky. And what does that say about his roommates? They must be some very repressed kinds of nerds…

7. Who Doesn’t Love A Good Dungeon Crawler?

If this whisper doesn’t immediately make you want to know who created the damn thing, then you might have some problems. Or you’re at least committed to a relationship you’re currently in and good for you. There are so many single gamer guys I know who would love to know a gamer girl who wants her dungeons explored while playing video games. College was great for that sort of thing. Playing GTA and swapping between who plays during day and night and exploring while the other person plays. Good times, I bet. Look, if you ever come across a gamer girl who just wants this kind of love…then take her up on it obviously! Everyone deserves a little bit of TLC. And hey, maybe you’ll manage to find some wonderful treasure while you explore.

6. Wait, This Guy Still Plays PS3?

Alright, to be fair here…I still play PS3 as well. As in, I still have and use that console. Plenty of people still play those games, they just play them on the PS4 after they buy them online. Either way, this guy totally deserves to get all of his gaming memory erased. Especially since it will be much harder for that gamer girl to erase the memory of this asshole cheating on her. So, it seems pretty fair to me. I wonder which this guy spent more time on. Stacking up memory on his PS3 playing video games, or spending time with his girlfriend. I’m going to guess that it’s the first one since he seemed to prefer spending time with someone else anyway. I guess that’s what you get when you cross a girl who knows how to use her controller.

5. Now That’s A Gamer Girl

This is just hilarious. It’s like the real-life version of this gamer girl’s boyfriend doesn’t really matter to her. I mean, it does in the sense that she’s able to score with him, but screaming out his gamer tag…hilarious. Of course, this could also mean that she’s just forgotten his name and that could be a reason to start sweating a little. How many of you gamer guys out there have been in the sack and had your girlfriend call out your gamer tag? Do you find it hot, or does it make you wonder if she actually remembers what your real name is? Either way, I suppose it is better than having her suddenly scream out someone else’s gamer tag. That would be one hell of an awkward day. I hope this boyfriend’s gamer tag isn’t something like “ManBEarPiG1019” (that’s a real tag).

4. Gamer Girls Are Just Hot, Ok?

Surely there are plenty of guys out there who actually don’t care what a gamer girl looks like. They’re just happy that they play video games. And that’s the way it should be. It would be like when I first discovered a girl who could really skateboard in high school. I feel in love on the spot! It’s awesome when girls share the same interests as you, right guys? So, it makes absolutely no sense, so far as I can see, that guys would abuse and criticize girls for playing video games. Give them a break! Most guys who play video games who aren’t 14-year-old friendless boys or high-strung meat-heads who play Call of Duty are typically just regular guys or basement-dwelling trolls who never see the light of day. So how can you really judge a girl who likes gaming? Deal with it, she’s better than you.

3. Was He With You In Every Room?

Alright, first of all, the water gun fight around the house sounds like a fun time but they could have accidentally hit the Xbox and ruined the rest of the day. You have to be careful about that sort of thing. But it does sound fun. But there’s something strange about this whisper. If this gamer girl is “doing it in every room of the house while he plays Xbox”…is he with her while she’s doing this? I mean…wouldn’t they have to bring the Xbox and a screen with them to each and every room in order to do that? Or is this girl scoring achievements with someone else in every room of the house while her boyfriend spends the day playing Xbox? I mean…it seems pretty likely that it’s the second option here. Moving the Xbox and a screen into every room seems like a huge pain in the ass.

2. She’s A Super Thief!

This is just fantastic. Though it’s unclear which part is better here. The fact that she committed a break and enter in order to get her Xbox back…or the fact that she couched it in incredibly nerdy terms. Make no mistake, “sneaking” into an ex’s place is definitely breaking and entering. But sneaking in, grabbing something that belongs to you, and then bragging about your sneak level is pretty epic. I think most of you would agree. Unless you are currently holding on to your ex-girlfriend’s Xbox and are now worried that when you’re not home or when you’re sleeping that she will sneak into the house and you’ll wake up unable to play Halo in the morning. As much as that would suck…you sort of deserve to sweat about that one.

1. Pokemon GO Should Never Be This Responsible

Ok, this is just sad. Considering that Pokemon GO has led people to walk out into traffic or to be mugged by people literally luring in gamers…it’s just too sad to know that it’s saving someone’s marriage. And since this was a whisper, we have no idea who this woman is who is hanging on by hunting pokemon. But we do know one thing. Anyone reading this who is married and goes out with their wife to play Pokemon GO is now really concerned about their marriage. And they should be too! How the hell can you let things get so bad that your wife is able to say that Pokemon GO is saving the marriage? That’s a whole level of messed up that I just don’t understand. Now anyone reading this who falls into that category, you go and hold your wife for a while and make her feel loved…after you finish this article.

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