For over a decade, WWE has placed a lot of trust on the broad shoulders of John Cena. During that time, he has become the most dominant, widely-known wrestler on the roster. Initially, he started his career with Ultimate Pro Wrestling back in 1999; Cena was quickly picked up by the WWE in 2001, where he began in their developmental promotion, Ohio Valley Wrestling (OVW). Again, Cena rapidly rose up through the ranks, and found himself on WWE TV, after just a year in OVW.
In total, Cena has won 24 titles (including 15 World Championships), he is a two-time Royal Rumble winner, a Money in the Bank winner, and has been in the main event of WrestleMania five times. Outside of the WWE, he’s been in multiple movies, does a ridiculous amount of media appearances, and has granted the most “wishes” in the history of the Make-A-Wish Foundation.
In 2015, Cena is having one of the best performances of any wrestler in the world, thanks to his U.S. Title reign, which included the extremely popular “U.S. Open Challenge”. Needless to say, when it’s all said and done, he’s guaranteed to be inducted in the WWE Hall of Fame.
Did you also know he put out a terrible rap album, drooled on a mic, and once had a terrible accident during one of his matches? No, this article isn’t to celebrate his achievements; it’s to celebrate some of the rare moments gone wrong for WWE’s “Golden Boy”.
11. “You Can’t See Me” Rap Album
Back in 2005, Cena actually released a full rap album, which, well, was absolutely terrible. “Achievement unlocked”, if you can actually sit through that entire album, which he recorded with his cousin “Tha Trademarc” and fellow rapper, “Bumpy Knuckles”.
Check out these abysmal lyrics on the song, “Right Now”:
“Excuse me for a minute while I lighten the mood
Just clap with me like the lightning do, yeah
A bit of soul food that you be bitin’ into
And if you feel me then I’m writin’ for you, uh-huh
Right now put another coat of wax on the ride
For a minute put the beef and the gats to the side”
10. I’m Gone… Just Kidding!
In 2012, Brock Lesnar returned to the WWE and instantly set his sights on the WWE’s brightest star, John Cena. The two met in an “Extreme Rules” match and after a hellish 17 minutes, Cena was able to defeat “The Beast” in front of a rowdy Chicago crowd.
Immediately after, Cena cut a promo that made it seem like he was going to be leaving for awhile. “If I gotta take a vacation so be it, if I’m going away for awhile, I just want to say thanks, for one hell of a last ride.”
Cena didn’t miss any time.
Evidently, this promo also enraged Lesnar, as he agreed to lose the match, but he thought Cena would be stretchered out of the ring afterwards, mostly to keep Lesnar from looking weak.
9. Bloody Judgment Day
In 2005, John Cena’s rise to the main event was helped in a big way by his feud against JBL, who was also the WWE Champion at that time. The two met up at WrestleMania 21 for the title, which Cena eventually won, afterwards he debuted a brand new “Spinner” belt, which became the bane of most wrestling fan’s existence for many years.
JBL held on to the original WWE title, and the two met at Judgment Day in an “I Quit” match to unify the titles. During the match, JBL landed a chair shot to the head, which led to Cena “blading” his forehead, maybe a bit too deep, as blood poured from his forehead. For the rest of the match, he wore a crimson mask, which in today’s WWE environment would not fly, at all. This was easily one of – if not the – bloodiest match of Cena’s career.
8. Box Office Bomb
Overall, Cena’s movie career has not been a success, but one movie in particular did quite poorly at the box office; it was known simply as Legendary. The gist of the movie was basically Cena was a troubled brother who helps out his younger sibling by teaching him how to amateur wrestle, and since he was bullied, to just stand up for himself.
The movie also starred Patricia Clarkson and Danny Glover, and only had a 5 million dollar budget, so it should do okay, right? Nope, the movie only brought in just over $200,000 and received a 17% on Rotten Tomatoes. After watching the trailer, you’ll see how corny the movie looked; probably best he sticks to pro wrestling.
7. Does My Nose Look Okay?
During an episode of Raw, Seth Rollins took on Cena for his U.S. title, overall the match was going just fine, until Rollins decided to absolutely flatten Cena’s nose. In a seemingly simple move, Rollins went for a jumping knee lift to Cena’s face and unfortunately, he was a bit too close bringing his knee directly into Cena’s nose, instantly breaking it.
John fell back to the corner, obviously stunned, but was able to finish out – and win – the match. The ringside Doctor immediately jumped in the ring to check on him, and as you’ll see, it was an ugly looking injury.
6. Promos With Women
You could look at these segments two ways: Cena is the face, and each time, the women are heels, so they should be ripped on by the “Hero”. The other way is that Cena comes off pretty misogynistic by calling women a “B****” or “H*”, when it’s supposed to be a PG show, and he’s one of the most PG characters on said show.
Sure, one time might just be a mistake, like when he went in on Eva Torres for jumping from guy to guy. Although, going back a few years it was Melina, then it was Vickie Guerrero, and finally, Lana. It’s a weird trend that, somehow, he’s gotten away with over the years.
5. Bathroom Troubles
Thanks to Total Divas and some radio interviews, Cena let it be known that he once defecated his pants during a wrestling match. Rather than describe it, here’s the story right from Cena:
“I was wrestling Scott Steiner, with Bull Buchanan as my lackey. I got food poisoning, and thought I wouldn’t be able to wrestle, but went out there anyway. I took a DDT, rolled out, and the time-keeper was there. I looked him in the eye and said, ‘Where do I puke?’ And he said, ‘Under the ring.’ So I went under the ring, and puked, and everyone knew it. But as I was puking, I crapped my pants. Luckily, it was at the end of the match, but nothing has ever topped that since.”
On Total Divas he said it was in Saskatoon, Saskatchewan, on the radio interview it was in Winnipeg, but the history books show Cena wrestling Steiner only once, in Florida. No matter the location, the incident was bad enough where he had to just simply throw his wrestling tights in the garbage… ew.
4. The Prototype
This is at the very beginning of Cena’s career, so a pass is probably in order, since he was still learning the business. As “half-man, half-machine”, Cena would cut his promos in a similar way to The Terminator.
The gimmick was used during his time in UPW and eventually in OVW, while training with the WWE. Once he debuted on SmackDown, the entire gimmick was scrapped, and he just became generic-looking wrestler, John Cena, which honestly, wasn’t much better. It wasn’t until he dressed up like Vanilla Ice and rapped on a SmackDown segment, that WWE decided to tweak his gimmick, yet again.
3. Unfriendly Crowd
As one of WWE’s top faces, Cena typically is cheered more than booed, but this was not the case at the 2006 One Night Stand PPV. On this night, he went up against Rob Van Dam in front of an overly aggressive Philly crowd, who were 100% behind RVD.
When Cena got to the ring, the crowd welcomed him with rolls of toilet paper, when he tried to throw his hat and shirt to the crowd, they continued to throw the items back in the ring. Eventually, Cena got the hint and stopped throwing his merchandise to the crowd. The match and environment was awesome to watch, but it was a borderline dangerous place for Cena to wrestle in – good thing RVD won the match!
2. Spittin’ Hot Fire
Cena is an aggressive guy, and for the most part, his promos tend to be incredibly intense, which is great. What is not great is when the camera zooms in on his face, and catches him drool all over the microphone.
While feuding with The Miz and R-Truth, Cena decided to announce who would be his tag team partner, and it was none other than The Rock! Well, when he said “The Rock”, Cena’s drool landed perfectly on the mic, which looked incredibly stupid. Wrestling fans instantly made gifs of the moment, and it’s still seen on wrestling sites today.
1. How About My Elbow, Does That Look Okay?
As you can see from the video, Cena’s elbow blew up to the size of a baseball, which was due to fluid build-up from a partially torn triceps injury. He was told by doctors to skip SummerSlam and get surgery instead; of course, Cena refused, and went on to have a fantastic match against Daniel Bryan.
On Raw, Cena showed off the bulging elbow, and let everyone know he would have to get surgery that would put him on the shelf for four to six months. Although, thanks to Cena’s super-human healing powers, he was back in the ring at the end of October, winning the World Heavyweight Championship in a match against Alberto Del Rio.
Even in his down moments, eventually he comes out on top; there’s just no other way to say it, but “LOLCENAWINS!”
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