Love hurts and sometimes sex does too. Unfortunately, some of the most shocking injuries happen behind closed doors in the name of love (or at least in the name of passion). Often it’s caused by people getting a little too crazy and experimental with their partner, but sometimes it’s just pure bad luck.
According to a report in the New York Daily News, every week one hospital would see at least two “wild” sex injuries and many more minor injuries must go unreported. Just watch an episode of the Discovery health series, Sex Sent Me to the ER to see the kind of wacky, bizarre, sad and sometimes horrific injuries sustained in the bedroom. This program has featured everything from patients who have a stroke during or after the act, right through to a virgin whose head was smashed through a wall during her first time.
Read on to find out 10 of the most shocking sex injuries in recent times. If nothing else, these 10 shockers prove that love is a battlefield, just like Jordin Sparks told us in her 2009 single, Battlefield. It’s scary to think what else may have happened behind closed doors if these 10 were deemed worthy to share with the world.
10. Love Bite Gone Wrong – New Zealand
Hickeys are commonly a hit among curious teenagers, keen to leave a playful mark on their boyfriend or girlfriend. It’s safe to say that unless you’re some kind of vampire, you’re aiming to leave a little stamp of your affection and that’s that. Unfortunately, that wasn’t the case for a New Zealand couple in their 40s in January 2011. A New Zealander giving his wife a hickey ending up causing a massive blood clot, which traveled all the way to her heart, caused a stroke, and left her arm paralyzed. She was rushed to hospital and her doctor Teddy Wu confirmed that the clot was caused by the suction of the love bite.
9. A Memorable Kiss – China
Anyone who thinks that kissing is harmless – think again. A young Chinese couple in December 2008 locked lips and the pressure was reduced in the woman’s mouth to the point that her eardrum was ruptured. Perhaps the young gentleman was a little over excited. The local newspaper, China Daily, reported that doctors advised people to “proceed with caution” when it comes to kissing. They also reported that the young woman in question was expected to regain all her hearing capacity within a couple of months.
8. The Failed Extension – Russia
Russian man in his late forties, Grigory Toporov opted for a penis extension in the hope that he would save his marriage which was on its last legs. Apparently his wife wasn’t impressed by his rather small penis and so he took action, getting a prosthetic extension for his penis. He headed home to impress the wife in between the sheets but in the middle of act there was a carnal catastrophe of sorts – the extension broke off and completely ruined the couple’s hopes of pleasure. He was reported as saying his wife filed for divorce shortly afterwards because she was “fed up” with his poor performance in the bedroom.
7. The Bad Business Trip – Australia
An Australian woman had sex in a hotel room while she was away on business. Unfortunately, her wild love-making resulted in the glass light fitting on the ceiling above to break and fall on her during the act. It hit her right on the head, causing injuries to her face and her mouth. What happened next was perhaps the strangest bit. She opted to sue her employers rather than the hotel owners. She (unsuccessfully) took her employers to court, saying that because the injury took place on a work trip it was their responsibility.
6. The Workout Orgasm – United Kingdom
In the United Kingdom, a 24-year-old reportedly suffered from “persistent genital arousal disorder” and she got there all on her own. According to the Daily Star (a UK tabloid paper), Amanda Knowles was playing with a Nintendo Wii Fit board and fell off it. As she fell, she twisted a nerve in the wrong place and she started finding that any small vibration (such as a food processor in action, or a call on her mobile phone) would cause stimulation. She was reported as saying there was no cure, and that she has to control the problem by “breathing deeply”. She was also searching for a man that could make the most of her constant stimulation.
5. A Concrete Experiment – USA
In the USA, a 20-year-old male sought medical attention due to a foreign object which was lodged in his rectum. The case was reported in the American Journal of Forensic Medicine and Pathology by Dr. Peter J. Stephens and Dr. Mark L. Taff. According to the report, the patient and his partner had mixed up a batch of concrete and poured it inside with a funnel. The result: a concrete piece weighing 275g, lodged inside the patient (who was apparently sober and healthy). The piece was removed and he was discharged the next day.
4. A Kinky Shock – USA
Kirsten Taylor, a 29-year-old from Pennsylvania in the USA tragically died from electrocution after some bedroom experimentation with her hubby. The night of her death, the pair had been using electric clamps on her nipples, and administering shocks by switching the power on and off. A surge of power resulted in her death. Taylor’s husband said they had been doing such things for a couple of years with no problems until that night.
3. Failed Kama Sutra – Russia
After getting hold of a book of Kama Sutra positions, a Russian pair in their 50s headed for the bedroom to try something new. They went through the book and decided to try “indrani” which could be translated as the “deck chair” position. The woman pulls her knees up tight so her legs are under her man’s armpits. She got there, but then had a muscle spasm which resulted in her being stuck there with her partner, unable to move an inch. After unsuccessfully trying to free themselves for an hour or more, they called an ambulance who were able to do the job. The parademic on the scene reportedly said: “We couldn’t help laughing looking at them. The two lovers, who were not young at all, were in such a complicated position.”
2. The Ring That Got Stuck – USA
One American man got into a bit of strife after getting a penis ring stuck on himself. The eight-inch, steel ring was homemade and after getting stuck he had to head to the hospital and seek medical attention. Urologist Dr Jordan Moskoff, who’s based in Chicago and is the star of the Discovery series Sex Sent Me to the ER, was on the scene to help. He had to saw the ring off and before that he got the guy to sign a waiver that his penis made need to be cut off. In the end, it turned out okay and he said “the guy was fine” but it was a bit touch and go for a while. He said as he sawed it off, sparks were flying and they were concerns that perhaps the curtains would catch on fire.
1. Knife Play – Canada
A 25-year-old Winnipeg University student named Catherine McCoubrey was asked by her sexual partner to “carve a heart-shaped symbol” on his chest. As a polite Canadian would, McCoubrey agreed to give it a go. However, as she was carving the love heart she cut too deep with the knife by accident and the knife reportedly punctured his heart. The man made a full recovery and although a criminal case was launched against McCoubrey, he supported her. She was eventually given three years of probation after pleading guilty to the charge of assault.
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