Do you ever wonder what your girlfriend is hiding from you? Do you believe that she keeps secrets only because she is too embarrassed to admit that she needs that particular item or she is interested in something that, for lack of a better word, is considered taboo? Guys you are not alone here; there are many men out there who are enduring the same hardships that you are, the hardship of dealing with a girlfriend who is embarrassed by some of her habits. Girls have a tendency of wanting to seem perfect to their significant other and if this includes hiding their flaws or their natural born traits, they will do it. Some people can’t take embarrassment and maintain the fact that they will die right there and then if they are openly embarrassed about something that was supposed to remain private and confidential.
Your girlfriend probably has more interesting things than you can collect in your lifetime. You may never know that she owned several sex toys during your whole relationship or that she is not a natural blond. You probably won’t know that she was previously engaged or already has her future wedding venue picked out and paid for. Women will do whatever is necessary to hide what they feel, and hide what will make them look unsavory in any way. Hell, she probably owns more Maxim magazines than you do. One word of advice, don’t lead on that you have found any of her little secrets, because chances are you may not have a girlfriend at the end of the night. Here is a list of items that your girlfriend is too embarrassed to admit she owns.
13. A Cookbook
Every girl wants to appear as though she is the perfect specimen and unless she is in the culinary field, you will not find a cookbook lying around her house. Why not? Because she wants to appear to be naturally capable in as many things as possible. She may be embarrassed that she needs the assistance of books, TV shows and the internet to cook a simple meal for her man, but at the end of the day, it’s all about impressing her guy and setting herself up for wifey status. What is more impressive than cooking a delicious meal without the help of a book?
12. At Home Hair Dye Kits
Surprise boo, she is not a natural blond, red head, brunette or whatever she is claiming to be. Didn’t you ever wonder why the carpet didn’t match the drapes? If she is lying about her silky tresses, chances are she doesn’t even throw away the box in her own home. To give her hair that natural look she washes it a bunch of times after she dyes it so it looks a bit washed out. Or, she straight up lies to your face. Have you ever said something along the lines of; “your hair looks shinier today”? She does that cute little giggle and says, “really”? But doesn’t actually answer our question.
11. Racy Novels
The only erotic fiction she wants you know that she reads is 50 Shades of Grey, and that is only because the media has made that novel socially acceptable, not to mention cool and exciting to read. However, anything else besides that puts you in an awkward situation so you hide it in the same drawers that you keep your vibrators and anything else that may seem improper to be caught with. Her love for racy novels has doubled since the vulnerable Anastasia and Mr. Grey jumped off the pages and into her life. It may not be as taboo as it used to be, but it still puts her in an awkward position when she’s caught.
10. A Collection Of Past Boyfriend’s Clothing
Have you ever caught yourself wondering if an article of clothing you found in your girlfriend’s house is yours? Maybe you left them there one night and it’s been so long you can’t remember, or maybe you found them in her drawers and assumed she washed them and put them away. Or maybe you knew right away that they did not belong to you and you are now wondering who the hell these clothes belong to. When you confront her she is now embarrassed and may never admit that those clothes belong to an ex or she will make sure you never find them in the first place.
9. A Wedding Gown (Before Getting Engaged)
In the back of her closet is a wedding dress that she hopes to wear one day; it was there when you met her and it will be there when you leave her (because obviously she is some kind of control freak). You were never meant to find the dress but you did somehow and now she has no real explanation for you besides; “it was so cute, and a great price I couldn’t leave it”. She will try to look cute by saying something like, “at least I already have my gown”. Or maybe she will burst into tears and talk about a failed engagement; either way, it is not a good look.
8. Old Love Letters
Old love letters are sentimental and sweet. They remind you of the good ol’ days and how much fun you had when you were first starting out. Besides that, they are few and far between and receiving one in this day and age is like the ultimate surprise. Unfortunately, the only reason why someone would not want you to know that they are keeping old love letters is because they are not from you. It is obviously suspicious that your girlfriend would secretly keep love letters from an ex-boyfriend and yes, it could have been that she forgot she even had them, but if they are kept safe in a beautiful box decorated with materials from Michael’s, you might have a problem.
7. All Her Old Dolls
If she is like most girls, she has all of her old toys packed away in her parent’s basement and refuses to allow her parents to throw them away. They could be worth money some day, they were an important factor to her childhood, and she is contemplating giving them to her own daughter later in life (or maybe she just can’t give them up). Let’s face it, the idea of your girlfriend keeping her old toy dolls because she doesn’t have the heart to throw them away is borderline obsessive. Just wait until she feels comfortable enough to put them on display.
6. The First Thing You Ever Gave Her
Awww, so she is getting sentimental on you; she keeps everything you give her anyway because who in their right mind throws away a gift. However, it gets dicey when the first thing you gave her was maybe the paper you wrote your phone number on (this is a pre-technology obsession of course), or maybe it is the receipt from the first dinner you had together. This is personal and over-romantic and exciting for her. But that’s just it; it is for her eyes only; she does not want you to know that she kept the small things, as she doesn’t want to come off all crazy or anything.
5. Like Twenty Different Face Moisturizers
Guys know nothing about combination skin, so you having a number of different facial and body moisturizers in your cabinets can throw them off a bit. They are even more confused when they see you do your night time routine for the first time and they realize that you use every single one of those moisturizers in one way, shape or form. Girls usually hide these things because they are scared to seem like a high maintenance chick or because they know how structurally insane it is to own a number of face productions just for your nightly routine. Whatever, at least we are trying to look good for you.
4. Pregnancy Tests
Some women like to hoard the essentials– tampons/pads, paper towels, toilet paper etc, so what’s a few pregnancy tests then? It is always handy to keep a couple of things that you may need in the future, but some things are for your girl eyes only. That being said, you have to wonder why your chick needs that many pregnancy tests on hand; is she that fertile? Or maybe that scared that she is going to slip up and get pregnant. Either way she obviously does not want you to find them and would rather save herself the embarrassment.
She keeps Playgirl’s under her bed just like how you keep Playboy’s under your pillow. Her now erased internet browser history is full of kinky p**n that she either likes or was interested in seeing how it plays out. If you asked her what kind of p**n she likes she won’t even admit that she knows what p**n is and if you challenge her on it she may look at you like you’re an idiot. No one wants to admit that they enjoy looking at something that most people see as perverted, and your girl is no different. The only upside is she my learn some new tricks for you.
It’s the guy’s job to buy the condoms right? Okay, so that sounds ignorant but one must admit a girl with her own stash of condoms is both genius and embarrassing. However, when you have a girlfriend who has her own stash of condoms and none of them are your size it can mean only a few things; they are really really old and expired or she had a side dude who is slightly bigger than you (yikes). If she does have her own stash of condoms you can guarantee that they are hidden very well in places she knows you won’t go (like the tampon box).
You may hear the buzzing one night when she thinks you’re sleeping, but you will never find it as long as she is diligent about hiding it. It is no secret that girls use toys and as taboo as they seem, you can almost guarantee that she has more than one. This is not an invitation for you to look for her buzzing friend that would just embarrass the crap out of her. However, it is an opportunity to maybe suggest she shake it up in the bedroom; of course after you do that she will look you in your face and be very coy about whether she owns one or not.
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