So what’s the big deal? What is it about this list that you need to read it right now? Well, we’re not going to tell you in this introduction because then you probably wouldn’t read the list. Most of the lists you read around here are very straight forward: Top 10 Coolest Cars or Top 10 Wrestlers with Big Heads or whatever it happens to be at the moment, but this list is different - this list is special.
There was some debate on what to call this list, but instead of getting into the details, we knew that we needed you to read it and we should just cut to the chase. We weren’t going to sell it with sex or popularity or whatever may get you to click on other lists. This list is important, so we’ll just come out and tell you we need you to read this list now.
We limited it to 10 reasons, but by the time it’s done, you’re going to realize that we could have done a much longer list. However, with the kind of information we’re going to provide, it just seems to make more sense not to overload you. Maybe, just maybe, we’ll do a second list, but for now, focus on the 10 things you’re about to read.
Please, read to the end. As the title says, there are 10 reasons, not 4, not 8, not 5. There are 10. We’re holding you up. We’re sorry. It’s time to take a look at 10 reasons you NEED to read this list NOW. Thank you.
10 You wonder what could possibly happen if you don’t have the information
We’re not going to give away why you need to read the rest of this list right here. We’ll just encourage you to keep reading, but first, it’s interesting how when we’re told that we must do something immediately, we feel compelled to find out what’s going on and surveying the situation. TV news has been going down this route for some time, trying to scare viewers into staying tuned until the next set of commercials is over. They’ll say things like, “This hidden danger in the trunk of your car could lead to your death. We’ll tell you about it after the break.” You don’t want to die because of something in the trunk of your car. It turns out, it’s the tire iron. More people are beaten to death in carjackings with the tire iron than any other blunt object, so don’t leave your tire iron in plain sight. Yes, that’s what you waited through the commercial to hear.
9 It sounds urgent
What happens if you wait to find out what is on this list? What happens if you get to No. 2 and it’s directions to claiming free movie tickets, but they are only available if you act in the next 10 minutes? What if it’s a phone number to call for your chance at a cash prize. Well, it’s not. It’s just another list. All it’s ever going to be is another one of these lists you read. It has nothing attached and despite the list’s title, there actually was nothing time-sensitive about it. Still, it’s important to move forward.
8 Despite your better intuition, you will anyway
We all have the little voice inside of us. Some call it God, some call it a conscience, some call it common sense. However you label it, inside each of us exists the ability to size up a situation and see it for what’s it’s probably really worth. Sometimes we get surprised, but most of the time that little voice is right. The question is, how often do you follow that little voice? Do you figure out the risk vs. reward and ignore the voice? Reading this list isn’t hurting anyone, so who cares if that little voice says reading it is a waste of time.
7 You can’t believe there would be a list like this
Really? Really? Somebody would actually write a list like this and then the website would actual publish it? There’s no way that would happen. At some point, this list gets very important, and these first few entries are just to weed out the people who are too lazy to keep going. Surely at some point the purpose of this list will be revealed? Whoever made a list like this had some kind of plan and you’re the kind of person who’s going to figure it out, even if it means reading every last entry.
6 You’re starting to suspect it’s a hoax, but need to be sure
The guy who took that famous picture of the Loch Ness Monster, on his deathbed, admitted the entire thing was a hoax. In fact, his last words were actually “I had you all going, didn’t I?” Go look it up. It’s true. Despite that, there are still “scientists” who spend years of their life that they could be researching the cure for cancer or better ways to feed the hungry who continue to look for the Loch Ness Monster. There is no Loch Ness Monster just like there is no Bigfoot. These are hoaxes. Why would you waste time on a hoax? That is... unless it isn’t a hoax.
5 You’re halfway there
You know a lot of people have quit at this point, frustrated that there hasn’t been a point to this list yet. They feel duped, they feel like fools, but not you. You’ve kept calm and kept your cool and patiently clicked through the entries, waiting to find out why you had to read this list right now. You may not have discovered it yet, but you’re not a quitter. You’re not one of those people who start a project, especially one as easy as reading a list on a website, and quits halfway through. You’re halfway through and you’re going to see this to the end.
4 You take direction well
There’s nothing even remotely wrong with doing as you’re told. Our society puts a premium on being an individual, being unique and being a rebel, but this world would descend into chaos if that actually happened. When you look at those people who don’t follow directions, they don’t actually seem very happy. Why stick out? Why rock the boat? It said that you needed to read this list now, so you did. There’s no shame in seeing a directive and choosing to follow it. More people should. Now click through and find out what Number 3 is.
3 You’ve gone this far, might as well finish
What’s a few more clicks? You know this is all building to something. You’re the kind of person who has faith that things will work out and you have a good work ethic. You’re going to see this thing through to the end. It doesn’t matter what doubts you have, it doesn’t matter what your intuition has told you. You started this project and while you’re pretty sure the payoff is going to be minimal, you still nonetheless want to see what Number 1 says. For you, it’s just as much about the journey as it is the final destination.
2 You just have to find out what Number One is
There’s nothing we could tell you right now that would stop you from clicking one more time and finding out what Number One is going to be. It’s nothing. We promise. There is no payoff, there is no wise knowledge. You won’t get a prize, nor will you feel better about yourself when you’ve finished this list. In fact, you’ll probably be upset with yourself that we’ve told you this wasn’t going to have any real meaning throughout. Nonetheless, there’s nothing we can do to stop you, so you might as well go ahead and find out what it is.
1 Congratulations! You reached Number One
The question really is what does it say that you went all the way. It’s impressive because you knew that the only prize was reaching Number One in and of itself and nothing written here would be worthy of a prize. You can say you did it. You got through the entire list that you were told to read immediately and despite inane entry after inane entry, you stuck to it. You can either feel good about yourself that you made it or you could feel like the world’s biggest sucker. It’s up to you. What is this list about? It’s about free will. How do you feel about yours?