10 Totally Bizarre Animal Sex Practices

The sex lives of animals in the wild is often as bizarre as some of the craziest scenarios you can imagine. With barnacles playing the Jonah Falcon of underwater mating (their penises grow up to eight

The sex lives of animals in the wild is often as bizarre as some of the craziest scenarios you can imagine. With barnacles playing the Jonah Falcon of underwater mating (their penises grow up to eight times the length of their body) to lice that have sex for 40 – 70 hours, animal sex is freaky!

However, most of their 'weirdness' isn't just for fun; they're usually vital to the successful perpetuation of the species. Like the way barnacles spermcast; at the bottom of the ocean, glued to a rock, how can they mate? Turns out, in addition to the long penile appendage, the gooseneck barnacle can 'fling' their sperm to be caught by a potential mate, up to 8 inches away.

Animals are weird and wonderful in their own way. The following are some of their attributes that just may remind you of someone you know.

10 Garter Snakes And Group Sex

Garter snakes are pretty to look at, so pretty that tourists flock to Manitoba to see them every year. However, they're not there just for the pretty colors, but for snake mating balls.

9 Ducks And Birth Control

Yes, animals practice birth control and they can do it on their own. Among fowl, forced copulation is a thing; an extremely painful one as male ducks have backward pointing penile spines. Male ducks also have 20cm long, corkscrew-shaped penises.

Female ducks have evolved vaginas that are long and also corkscrew-shaped, but in the opposite direction. This ensures that any attempt at forced copulation proves too challenging for the male and he abandons the pursuit. However, if she is willing, she relaxes the muscles of her genital tract to allow the male to fully enter her.

8 Male Bowerbirds And Courtship

Unlike the Guinean bird-of-paradise who dances his way into a females heart, the male bower bird shows off his prowess as a master builder. He builds an elaborate nest to woo the female bird. Using twigs, stones, flowers, feathers; anything to make his bower more attractive to the female.

7 Bats And Oral Sex

The act of oral sex isn't monopolized by humans; bonobos, macaques, fruit bats, all engage in fellatio. During their upside down copulation, the female short-nosed fruit bat repeatedly bends to lick the male organ. Researchers found that this helped to prolong their copulation, often making it twice as long.

6 Porcupines And Golden Showers

The journey to making adorable little porcupettes isn't a smooth one for either the male or the female porcupine. For one, there are over 30,000 razor sharp quills to contend with. Plus the female porcupine only has an 8 to 12 hour fertility window. As porcupines are notably solitary creatures, it becomes a race for any males in the vicinity to reach the female and mate.

5 Bonobos, Sex, Sex And Sex

To a bonobo, sex is the answer to everything. Disagreement over food? Have sex. Someone encroaching on your space? Have sex. They even use sex as a form of greeting.

Bonobos are also well known for their display of human-like sexual 'expressions.' They kiss (with tongues), they mate facing each other, they engage in oral sex even giving out mutual hand stimulation. They have evolved to use sex as a way to diffuse aggression and not only a means of reproduction.

4 Fiesty Dolphins

Dolphins are supposed to be highly intelligent creatures. Male dolphins channel this intelligence into satisfying their carnal desires. How? Because they know females who have just given birth are not interested in mating, male dolphins kill baby dolphins just to get the mothers interested in mating again. Some males have been reported to separate the female from the herd, ensuring she can't feed until she allows him to mate.

3 Giraffes And Taste Tests

2 Pandas, Lack Of Interest

When in captivity, these exotic animals are notoriously bad at breeding. Even in supposedly ideal environments, sex just doesn't happen. One reason may be because female pandas only experience sexual excitement, once a year, within a narrow 24 - 72 hour window. Another aspect of this problem is that the window can occur anytime between February and May.

1 The Antechinus And Death By Sex

The Antechinus is a type of shrew indigenous to Australia. It is one of the few marsupials to exhibit semelparity i.e. they have sex only once in their lifetime.

With the clock ticking (males of this specie usually live for only one year), the shrew must find a way to procreate. As much as possible. To ensure breeding success, the male spends up to 14 hours mating, with as many females as possible. He is literally jumping from partner to partner to ensure that he has a chance at having offspring. He is so focused on this that he does little else. His body is stripped of vital proteins so fast that he bleeds internally, his fur falls off and even his immune system is shot to pieces.

Yet he's still after more sex. By the end of the mating season, a few weeks short of his first birthday, the average Antchenius male is dead from sheer exhaustion.


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10 Totally Bizarre Animal Sex Practices