Candy….the magic word that turns otherwise angelic children into hyper maniacs, the thing that adults use to bribe their misbehaving children that are knocking over jars in the grocery store and the taste of sweet sour goodness in your mouth. Sadly not all candy is delicious and over time there has been some very horrible candies made. These disgusting revolting candies below fall into the really horrible idea category and frankly we aren’t quite sure why anyone would go to any trouble to invent them. Most of these candies are still available to purchase, somewhere in the world for those brave or weird enough to actually want to try them. The candy below fits into one of two categories of disgusting; the actual taste of the candy or the concept of the candy. Fancy scooping some ear wax out of a realistic looking ear into your mouth? How about sucking away on a lollipop that actually tastes like a chili pepper? Or why not throw back a cup of sour candy that is designed to look like a urine sample jar? Read on to discover some of the most disgusting candy ever made.
10. Ear Wax Candy
Unfortunately this candy is exactly what it sounds like; a realistic looking plastic pink ear that has been filled with sticky orange jelly like candy. The sticky orange jelly represents the ear wax and complete with this candy comes a plastic swab that you use to dig it out of the ear. There is a cover that pops open to give users access to the ear wax and to close to keep it fresh; although we aren’t sure fresh is the right word we should be using. The taste is fruity but somehow we just can’t get over the fact that it resembles ear wax and we are digging it out of a very real looking ear. We’re just thankful they didn’t go one step further and make the ear in a colour that made it even more real; now that would have crossed the line.
9. Lick Your Wounds Candy Scab
You know the time when you were a kid and you skinned your knee, your mom put a Band-Aid on it and two days later when you changed the Band-Aid there was this oozing red scab that was crusty and otherwise fascinating or disgusting to look at? If it was fascinating to you this candy might be right up your alley. These candy scabs are two parts; first there is the adhesive plastic bandage that sticks to your skin. Secondly the bandage opens up with a flip compartment to reveal a realistic looking scab. The scab is the candy, perfect for licking and saving for later when you close back up the compartment. Refills of the scabs are included in the box. To sum it up; eating this candy is like licking your own scab. The taste isn’t horrible but the thought; well it’s too much for us to even talk about more.
8. Chocka Ca-Ca
The name certainly doesn’t give away what these disgusting treats are but let us educate you on the Chocka Ca-Ca; a popular gag gift for baby showers. This “loaded” candy is not so much a candy but a chocolate surprise but is so gross we couldn’t help but include it. So what is it? Chocka Ca-Ca is real diapers that hold a brown chocolate turd inside; shaped like a turtle. First off, how about we not go around giving people real diapers with realistic poop inside? Secondly the instructions on the box state to microwave the diaper (chocolate included) for a few seconds and then enjoy eating the “gooey chocolate mess made inside”. How is that for literally eating “crap”?
7. Hotlix Insect Candy
The original edible insect candy creator could simply not be left off this list. From chocolate dipped scorpions to insect brittle to suckers that feature ants, crickets, worms and more; this company was one of the first to take gross to a new level. The inspiration behind the company comes from the owner who took inspiration from tequila that was served with a worm; he also happens to eat insects on a regular basis. These candies won’t harm you and if you can get over the fact you’re crunching on a worm; they aren’t in fact as gross tasting as you might think. But it’s up to you whether a scorpion sliding down your throat grosses you out or not.
6. Jane-Jane Tasty Tuna Tidbits
Fish flavored candy. Do we need to explain why this is such a terrible idea? These brightly colored foiled candies are quite deceptive and they look like something you might see in your grandma’s candy bowl. But don’t them fool you; these candies are made from tuna as the main ingredient, followed by a whack of chemicals and sugar. The taste, we imagine is like sucking on a dried tuna fish that has been processed and packaged and sat on the store shelves for an undetermined amount of time. One Asian food market describes the taste as natural, healthy and fresh; after boasting a shelf life of 12 months. Unfortunately we are going to pass on trying these and trust that these are incredibly disgusting; not only in concept but in taste too.
5. Bean Boozled Jelly Beans
From a very reputable and otherwise delicious company; Jelly Belly has produced a package of jelly beans so gross and horrid that we actually almost threw up reading about them. The worst part; these mixed packs of jellybeans look so similar in appearance you have no idea if you are biting into a barf flavoured bean or a peach flavoured bean. Jelly Belly calls the flavors “weird and wild”, we prefer disgusting. Flavors include canned dog food, rotten eggs, stinky socks, booger, moldy cheese, barf, baby wipes, skunk spray, lawn clippings and toothpaste. Millions of Yucks and Counting is the motto of this brand and we have to add one more YUCK from us; you can’t pay us enough to eat these on a regular basis.
4. Sour Candy Liquid Urine Samples
What we think is the absolute grossest candy on our list in terms of concept is the sour candy liquid urine samples. The concept may ring funny for lots of people; pee is one of the human bodily functions that people love to joke about. Common jokes include guys relieving themselves in a pop container and leaving it so the next guy comes and take a swig out of it, men spelling their names in the snow and everything else funny about pee. But is this over the top? Caps complete with screw on lids and sterile stickers, full with bright yellow sour liquid. The bright yellow liquid is perhaps the only unrealistic thing about this candy; as it looks like the patient is severely dehydrated. Shooting back a cup of pretend liquid urine is something we never want to do. Period.
3. Chili Lix Pepper Shaped Lollipops
This is just one of those candy creations we truly don’t understand. Lollipops that are shaped like jalapeños and chili peppers and actually taste like them. Not for the faint of heart these suckers are burning hot with a taste that rings true to its name. Why anyone would want to suck on a jalapeño pepper sucker for any amount of time is beyond us. Available in habanera, jalapeño and sugar free chili (for the healthy eaters we assume?) flavor we can only assume people purchase these as a sick Halloween joke.
2. Mini Blood Bags
They may taste like cherry or strawberry but that is the only thing this candy has going for it. The mini blood bags are exactly as they sound, realistic looking blood bags that are normally reserved for giving people blood. Instead this candy encourages people to suck the blood right out of these bags. Complete with a label that includes blood type, donor name and date of expiry; this is perhaps too real. Fortunately these blood bags are mainly marketed for the Halloween season but available to purchase year round. We don’t know about you but we would be pretty grossed out to see a kid walking down the street drinking out of a blood bag in the middle of the summer. The disgusting concept outweighs how good these actually might taste.
1. Hose Nose Candy
This candy is “snot” your regular mask; or goes the saying that tends to follow this candy everywhere. Hose Nose Candy is two parts; the first is an awfully ugly nose mask that fits over your own nose. The second is the slimy candy that runs out of the mask and you catch with your tongue. Yes this is a replica of a snotty nose and it encourages you to eat the snot. We aren’t sure which is grosser; the fact that you have to wear the mask or that you actually catch the slimy snot with your tongue. The slime is green in colour with an apple taste while the nose mask looks like it is either covered in warts or pimples. If you don’t feel like eating your snot but just wearing the mask, don’t fear there is a bright red cap that traps your snot inside. There are so many things gross and disgusting about this candy we can’t bear to talk anymore about it without risk of causing you to vomit.
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