The Real Housewives is one of the most popular reality-show franchise of all time. It started in Orange County, and since then, it has expanded to Atlanta, New Jersey, New York City, and Beverly Hills, among many others. The point of the show is for us regular folks to see how the 1 per cent really live, and the expectation, of course, is that when people have a lot more money than we do, that they are going to have much better lives, too. At least that’s what one might think, but the reality is quite different.
Probably the only people around these real housewives that do better than them is their lawyers because they’re always getting into trouble. Whether it be criminal cases, fraud, not paying their rent, driving while they are drunk, or having a boyfriend that pretends to have cancer, or don’t pay their child support, or even kids that have been charged with attempted murder, there is no doubt that these women keep their lawyers busy. A lot of these lawyers must keep these women on speed dial.
Here are 20 Truths The Real Housewives Lawyers Don’t Want us to Know.
20. Danielle Staub — Accused Of Kidnapping Among Other Things
Danielle was on The Real Housewives of New Jersey, and it was pretty obvious that she really was quite nuts. Talk about keeping her lawyer busy, she has been accused of transporting substances and it is also common knowledge that she was an escort at some point. She’s also been accused of kidnapping, she received probation for that, though. If that wasn’t enough to keep her lawyer busy, she once wrote a book and her ex-husband threatened to sue her over it, then she signed a three-year deal with Scores Gentleman’s Club to appear as a fully nude stripper, but then went to counselling and never fulfilled the deal. Talk about a lawyer’s dream come true.
19. Brandi Glanville — DUI
Former model Brandi Glanville was a cast member on The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. She’s also been on Celebrity Apprentice. She was known for liking her wine a bit, which is probably why she got busted for a DUI. She took a plea deal to avoid jail time, she was sentenced to 36 months probation, a 3-month alcohol-free program, and a $390 fine. She also married actor Eddie Cibrian and had two kids with him, but ended up getting divorced. I’m not sure who her lawyer is, but between her DUI and an expensive divorce, her lawyer must have made out okay working for Brandi.
18. Marlo Hampton — Knife Fight
Marlo Hampton from The Real Housewives of Atlanta is truly a lawyer’s dream come true. She was prosecuted for aggravated battery because she slashed a friend’s face with a knife and then was arrested a whole bunch of more times for parole and probation violations. It seems like she was arrested 7 times in all, which is obviously a little on the extreme side. I am sure that she had more than one lawyer over all this time, as it would seem impossible that one lawyer would have the patience or the resilience to deal with this kind of thing. Either way, it is pretty apparent that her lawyers stay pretty busy.
17. Kelly Killoren Bensimon — Assault
Kelly is a model and a socialite who was on The Real Housewives of New York City. In 2009, she was arrested for a misdemeanor assault after her boyfriend said she punched him. She later accepted a plea deal where the charges would be dropped if she completed two days of community service. She’s also been through a divorce, which leads to a little more cash for the lawyer representing her. Kelly is drop-dead gorgeous and has the vibe of a really classy woman, but she was always fighting on the show and apparently punching her boyfriends. Hope she has a lawyer on retainer.
16. Joe Giudice — Fraud
Joe was on The Real Housewives of New Jersey and is married to Teresa. He was sentenced to 41 months in prison for bankruptcy fraud. His wife visited him and said, “Joe is doing great. I mean, he’s lost like maybe 30, 40 pounds. I mean, he’s thinned out and he’s really muscular and really toned and really fit. Like I saw him, not last week, the week before, and I loved the way his hair was styled. When I go see them, they’re all clean-cut, they look really good. You know, everybody looks good when all their families come to see them, so he looked really good that day.” Umm, yeah Teresa, tell it to your lawyer.
15. Teresa Giudice — Fraud
Teresa was also the star of The Real Housewives of New Jersey, man that show had a lot of winners on it. She was also sentenced to prison for fraud for 11 months. One thing her lawyer probably doesn’t want you to know is that she is suing him. She filed a $5 million lawsuit against her bankruptcy lawyer for failing to meet with her before filing for bankruptcy. Sure, Teresa, that all makes sense — both you and your husband went to prison and it’s all your lawyer’s fault. I don’t know about you, but I’m not buying it. I wonder what lawyer she hired to sue her other lawyer — not a good look.
14. Melissa Gorga — Shoplifting
Once again, we have another one from The Real Housewives of New Jersey. Melissa used to be a stripper, but that isn’t what this is about. She was arrested for shoplifting and when she didn’t appear in court, a warrant was put out for her arrest. She is married to Teresa Giudice’s brother who also appears on the show. Are you kidding me? I can’t even imagine the drama that goes around the dinner table during family time — it must be around 15 family members and about 8 lawyers. No matter how you slice it, this is one family who has done their best to keep her lawyers living in mansion in New Jersey.
13. Marysol Patton — DUI
In an extremely odd case, both Marysol Patton from The Real Housewives of Miami and her mother were arrested for driving under the influence in the year 2010. Like mother like daughter I suppose. Marsol pled guilty to a lesser charge of reckless driving and got a $1000 fine, plus $581 in court costs. Marysol is also divorced, so all in all, this really is a pretty sweet scene when it comes to whoever is representing her as a lawyer, who knows, maybe the same person that represents her is also the one that is her mother’s lawyer. Either way, 201o was quite a year for these two. Patton runs a public relations group, so at least she knows how to handle bad press.
12. Mama Elsa — DUI
Mama Elsa from The Real Housewives of Miami is one of the wildest characters we have ever seen on any of the shows, in part because of her personality and also because of the tragic plastic surgery she ended up getting, which is too bad because she was gorgeous when she was young. She, like her daughter, also was arrested for DUI, as well as driving without a valid license. Her case was dropped when the arresting officer failed to show up in court, but I am sure that she still had to pay her lawyer to be there, am I right? Sadly, Mama Elsa suffered a stroke a few years ago, so she hasn’t been seen a whole lot since.
11. Michaele Salahi — Attended A White House Dinner Without Being Invited
Michaele is without a doubt someone that is paying her lawyer to keep some secrets. She and her husband Tareq Salahi crashed the White House during the state dinner to try to be impressive for the cameras, but they weren’t invited. Because of security issues, she had to have a hearing with the U.S. House of Representatives Homeland Security Committee. Talk about someone that needs a good lawyer. Can you imagine attending a dinner at the White House that you weren’t even invited to and bringing a camera crew along? She also claimed to be a former Miss U.S.A and a Washington Redskins cheerleader, neither which were true.
10. Slade Smiley — Didn’t Pay Child Support
There is no doubt that Slade Smiley is kind of charming, in fact, he is so charming that he has actually hung out with three different women on The Real Housewives of Orange County. First, he was with Jo De La Rosa, where in theory, Slade was the rich one of the two. Then he dated Lauri Peterson before finally winding up with Gretchen Rossi only after it became clear that she was the rich one and he was broke as a joke. He was so broke, he wasn’t paying child support. There’s even a collector tracking him down after he and Gretchen were out partying on the town. Hopefully Gretchen got him a good lawyer.
9. Sonja Morgan — DWI
Sonya Morgan of The Real Housewives of New York City was in need of a good lawyer a few years back after getting popped and charged for driving while intoxicated. “Sources said she had been partying on the East End over the course of the Memorial Day weekend. After failing a series of field sobriety tests, the ex-wife of J.P. Morgan’s great-grandson John Adams Morgan refused to take a Breathalyzer test and was taken to local police headquarters and slapped with a DWI rap, according to cops.” This seems like an isolated incident for her, and she has stayed out of trouble since.
8. Lynne Curtin — Served Eviction Notice
Talk about needing a lawyer, when Lynne Curtin, her husband, and their two children joined The Real Housewives of Orange County, apparently her husband felt they needed a nice house to keep up appearances. The thing is, though, he never paid the rent. According to sources close to the situation, Curtin and her husband never forked over more than $12,000 their landlord claimed they owed in rent and other expenses for the home they rented. The wildest part is, the dauhters were served an eviction notice on the show, and apparently, Lynne didn’t know anything about it either. What a nice guy her husband was.
7. Gretchen Rossi — Inherited Millions
Gretchen Rossi obviously had a pretty darn good lawyer. She was originally on the show as the much younger love interest of Jeff Beitzel. When he passed, he left her millions of dollars and then she continued on the show and began to date Slade Smiley. She was also sued by her ex who said she was just using Beitzel and that he was actually her real boyfriend. All in all, it seems like Gretchen is a lawyer’s dream come true, although I will say one thing, even though she and Smiley are not on the show anymore, the two are still hanging out, so it seems like they might have a real love connection after all.
6. Kenya Moore — Refused To Pay Rent
When it comes to having a place to live, usually you have to actually own it or pay rent, but tell that to Kenya Moore of The Real Housewives of Atlanta. This whole scene actually happened on camera, where she was accused of not paying her rent. Her landlord tried to evict her and she ended up moving out in front of the cameras. This might be a little silly for me to say, but when it comes to being a “Real Housewife,” don’t you actually need a house to live in? “The Real Homeless Women of Atlanta” doesn’t have quite the same ring to it. Maybe Kenya never got the memo. Who knows?
5. Sheree Whitfield — Shoplifting
Sheree Whitfield, also from The Real Housewives of Atlanta is another woman that is no stranger to lawyers. She’s been arrested for driving under the influence, and twice for shoplifting after she stole twice from Saks Fifth Avenue. She’s since been banned from shopping there again. She also has a boyfriend in prison. “I feel like he gets me. We’ve been talking on the phone.” That sure is romantic. Actually, who am I kidding? That is kind of crazy. I hope she has a good lawyer to look out for her, but with her past, she probably does.
4. Adrienne Maloof — Lied To The Courts
Adrienne Maloof of The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills is totally loaded, but that doesn’t mean she doesn’t need a lawyer. She got caught lying to the court when she accused her ex-husband of child abuse. This is the thing I don’t get about some of these people, if they have so much money, why do they want to be on television? If I was rich like her, I would just want to be left alone. The thing is, though, part of the reason some of these people are rich is their thirst for fame, and some of the reasons that many of these lawyers are so rich is that they meet people like Adrienne Maloof.
3. Brooks Ayers — Faked Medical Document
Is there anyone creepier then Brook Ayers? When he became Vicki’s boyfriend on The Real Housewives of Orange County, it was pretty obvious he was a bit of a con, but she didn’t see it. Eventually, it came out that he had forged documents to make it appear he had been a patient at a cancer hospital. Seriously? Who does that? He later said, “Through the first five years of dating Vicki, I was coined as a con man, low life, gold digger, deadbeat, etc. Nothing could be further from the truth in reality, yet this alone makes for great TV and for controversy.” Yeah okay, Brooks, whatever you say.
2. Jason Hoppy — Stalking
Bethenny Frankel was such a big star on The Real Housewives of New York City, that Bravo gave her a show of her own Bethenny Ever After. She is also a very successful entrepreneur. Jason Hoppy is her ex-husband, who was recently arrested for harassment and stalking. The charges were dropped after he agreed to a protection from harassment order. The two are now having a bitter legal battle over custody of their daughter. This goes to show you that even in a situation where it seems like you have everything going for you, things can go bad quickly, which is why it pays to have a good lawyer around.
1. Joshua Waring — Serious Crime
Joshua Waring is the son of Lauri Peterson, who was on The Real Housewives of Orange County. He appeared quite often in the first season of the show. Even though he seemed troubled back then, we didn’t think he was this troubled. Waring has been in and out of trouble for years, mostly because of substance issues, and was recently charged with attempted murder last summer after allegedly shooting a man and then taking off in a stolen car. Addiction is a very scary thing for families and hopefully he gets his life together, and as far as the attempted murder charge goes, I hope his mom got him a good lawyer.
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