When historians look back on this time in history, there is a lot of stuff that they’re going to be confused by. How did Trump get elected? Why did Britain vote for Brexit? Whatever happened to that Keaton kid? However, one of the biggest problems they’re going to have to contend with is understanding how any of us were able to let something like Tinder become the major cultural phenomenon it has become. Crazy to think there was a time when people didn’t use any technology when they began courting someone!
One of the major things up for debate when it comes to Tinder culture is how people are supposed to start up a conversation with somebody who decided you were good looking enough to swipe right. If you’re high-level hot then you don’t really have to worry about it much, but if you’re like the rest of us, that first sentence can make a real difference on how the other person will see you. Whether you’re looking for love or just someone to hold you in bed that night, what you choose to say at the beginning of the conversation will play a big part in whether you get what you want.
So, are you ready to find out some of the best openers and some of the worst pick-up lines out there? If you’re looking for love, use the first 8 and avoid the last 7!
BEST PICK-UP LINES
15. “So How Does This Work, Are We Dating Now?”
Not only does this make you look confident, it shows that you’re into something a little more serious than just meeting up once and then never calling them again. Plus, it’s easy to see this as either a serious comment or a joke. If they think it’s a little bit too much, you can just pretend that you were being silly. According to the people of Reddit, this one is guaranteed to get you in there straight away, with none of that messing around you often have when you go into your Tinder messages. We’re not saying this will work for everyone, though. There are some people out there who will be turned off by the mere mention of a date, so maybe take a look at their bio and see if they’re looking for something a little less serious. Doing a little background research is important!
14. “Hey, Unoriginal Cheesy Pick-Up Line Or Boring Conversation Starter. What Do You Prefer?”
Once again, with this sort of opener, you get a chance to see what the other person is looking for so you’ve got more of a chance of success. Plus, it shows that you’re aware how ridiculous this situation is, as well as highlighting how insecure men can be on Tinder. By referencing the fact that openers can be excruciatingly bad, you end up throwing out a pretty good opener by putting the onus on the other person to decide what they want from you. As a warning, though, we would make sure that you’ve got something pretty good waiting in your back pocket as a follow up just in case they decide to test you and ask for a cheesy pick-up line. We reckon this is more likely than them asking you for something boring because who would willingly ask for something like that?
13. “So When Are We Getting Married? That’s How This Thing Works, Right?”
So, we’re not saying that this isn’t a great opener because we still think it is, we just wanted to give you a look at how it can go wrong just in case you come up against someone who sees through your game. This is pretty unlikely to happen, but that doesn’t mean it can’t, and you have to have a better response than the one that this guy had. We reckon he thought it was best to just cut his losses and get out there, but we don’t think that was necessary. If he’d been a true master of the conversation, we think he could’ve saved this opener if he really wanted to, but maybe he thought that it just wasn’t worth the energy at that point. We probably would’ve made a cheesy comment about a three-way wedding and see where it took us.
12. “From 1 To America, How Free Are You Tonight?”
If you ask us, this is actually a bit of a risky one, although people seem to believe that it’s regularly sorting them out with some good Tinder responses. We know that this is meant as a joke and we think most people will take it that way, but we live in a pretty fractured society at the moment, one where people feel as if the government aren’t looking out for everyone equally. If you get somebody with radical views or someone who feels they’ve been persecuted by this country in the past, there’s a chance this one could really backfire on you. That being said, even then, it would spark off a pretty interesting conversation, so it’s probably a win no matter what happens.
11. “Is Your Real Name Katniss? Because You’re Causing An Uprising In My District.”
Not only is this silly, meaning it will make the woman on the other end laugh, it also refers to pop culture. If you get a particularly nerdy woman, then we think this would be the perfect one to pick. However, you need to be careful using a line like this if you know nothing about The Hunger Games. If you find a woman who likes the series, then you’re going to have to come up with some extra trivia and knowledge. If you can’t be bothered to put in the work, you should stay away from this one. If you happen to like the books or the films, or even better, both, then we reckon this could be a fantastic opener for anyone who is looking to nerd out with a likeminded female.
10. “If You Were A Triangle, You’d Be Acute One.”
Okay, this one definitely wouldn’t work on us, be we know there are a lot of women out there who are looking for a cute line that also hints at some sort of knowledge. The great thing is, you don’t really need a high level of intelligence to use this one. Anybody with a high-school education would get this opener, so it’s not as if you’re throwing yourself at some difficult math conversation here. That being said, we reckon that this could get you in a sticky situation if you happen to be talking to a particularly intelligent woman, especially one that specializes in math. If you don’t have that sort of knowledge and want to avoid an awkward conversation in which you have to backtrack, then we suggest not using this one. For everyone else, go for it!
9. “Busy Friday?”
Believe it or not, but the direct approach has been known to work in the past, so it’s no surprise that a lot of men out there are deciding not to go for a cheesy pick-up line and going straight for what they actually want. A lot of women will respect this since it’ll show them they won’t be having to play any games with you. If you’re the kind of guy who doesn’t respect open honesty, then we’re not sure how well this one will work for you as it’s likely to only go down well with women who like their men and their relationships as blunt as physically possible. You don’t want to end up with a woman who thinks you’re always like this, but then having to explain you’re just not that much of a straight talker when it comes to love.
8. “I Want To Paint You Green And Spank You Like A Bad Avocado.”
We’re not sure we even know where to start with this one if we’re being honest because there’s no logic to it whatsoever. If this one works for you, it’s only because the woman on the other end is probably fun, which is always a good thing. However, there’s no intelligence to this one or any defining characteristic that we can see, so we think that it’s probably best not to analyze this sort of thing. If you find love with this sort of opener, then you know that it was meant to be based on silliness, not based on any sort of deeper meaning. There’s nothing wrong with that. Sometimes, you need to just grab the things that you’re handed and not worry about it.
7. “Is Your Last Name Waldo, Because A Girl Like You Is Hard To Find.”
Just so you know, we’re now moving into the openers that we don’t think will work for anyone, no matter how suave they are or how much time they’ve spent on their Tinder bio. We’re just warning you now because some of these actually sound pretty similar to the ones that work, which just goes to show you that there’s a fine line between success and failure. This one is just far too cheesy for pretty much every girl on this planet. There’s no way that a woman with any self-respect is going to fall for a man who tries to open the conversation up with something that actually hurts to look at. There is so much cringe wrapped up in these words that we’re struggling to keep our eyes open while we’re writing this.
6. “I Want To Wrap You In My Arms And Make You My Burrito.”
Okay, while this may work with somebody that you’re already with, since it’s silly and cute at the same time, it’s certainly not something you want to be saying to someone before you properly know them. It’s just way too forward to work as an opener on something like Tinder, which means women are more likely to find it cringe-worthy than cute. It can be hard for people to know sometimes where the fine line is, but this is definitely just edging over into the cringe category. Maybe keep this in your back pocket if it starts going well with someone, but never use it too early. Bonus points if your new woman is a massive fan of burritos!
5. “I Have A Knife And A Fork. Now All I Need Is A Little Spoon.”
Is there really anybody out there that thinks this sort of thing is ever going to work? First off, never start a conversation with a girl with the word “knife.” There is something so unpleasant about this that we really can’t put our finger on it, but we think it’s because it tries to act all cute but really, it’s hiding a reference to get close with someone else. You should be upfront with this sort of stuff, otherwise it just comes across as awkward. Take it from us when we say that if you want to be spooning with someone soon, you better not be using openers like this anymore. Try one of the other ones above and see if you start getting a few more hits from interested women. We promise you your luck will change once you drop this sort of awkward opener.
4. “You Into Conspiracies, Because I Want To Get Illuminaughty With You.”
You know what, we think there’s a chance that 1 per cent of women out there would actually respond pretty positively to this, but we still had to put it in the bad side of the list because we know that most women wouldn’t enjoy this sort of opener. We do have to say, though, that if you happen to find a woman who is into her conspiracy theories, then we think this one could do a lot for you. That being said, we’re not sure we really want this to happen. If anything, we want to keep you guys apart, not make it so you’re finding it easier to move into groups and continue to spread this nonsense like wild fire. We’ve already got millions of people who believe the things Alex Jones says for money.
3. “I’m A Quarter-Aged Male In The Middle Of Man Heat.”
We don’t think there is a more disgusting thing on this list. It may not make us cringe as much as some of the others, but it does make us wonder why women would ever subject themselves to the likes of men. If you happen to be a straight woman and you have to go through this sort of stuff to actually find a man that is worth spending time on, we don’t think we could manage to wade through the wasters in an attempt to find someone we liked. Why can’t men see that sometimes, they’re just far too disgusting for anybody to bother with in this world. You need to keep things like this inside your own head, not go posting it on an online dating profile.
2. “Call Me ASAP!”
While it may work to be forward with some women as an opener on Tinder, it probably doesn’t endear them to you if you just straight up give them your number and demand that they call you. This shows that you have no intention of putting any major time or effort into building a relationship. Not only that, but there’s a reason that a lot of women don’t just give their number out to men at random in the first place. They don’t want you to have their number. They’re using an online dating profile to try and have some sort of distance from you until they figure out whether you’re worth spending some time on. Based on the sorts of openers we’ve seen on this list so far, we’re not really that surprised either.
1. “What If One Day You Woke Up And You Were A Chicken Nugget?”
Believe it or not, we know a lot of women we reckon this would work on. We’re not sure why, but chicken nuggets seem like one of those things people on the Internet go way too crazy for, sort of like cats or bacon. For this reason, if you get the right person, this one has a real chance of working. Sadly, a lot of women aren’t on Tinder to be reminded of their life so far. They want a chance to be whisked away from the world they know and into the arms of a perfect stranger, somebody who will show them things they’ve never seen. By asking her about chicken nuggets, you’re proving that you may be compatible in some ways, but that you won’t be bringing anything new to the table, or anything that deep either for that matter.
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