Having relationship issues is a problem with almost everyone. Even the happiest of relationships have issues from time to time. Now, we can say that the blame should be evenly spread around, but this article isn't about how relationships are 50-50 propositions. No. This is going to be a one-sided assault. Think about it this way: if you're in a difficult relationship with a woman and believe it's more like 60-40 or 70-30 her fault, then this article is just for you. We're not hiding bias here, just like Cosmo can pound away on men. Nope, we're going to delve a little deeper into some women's misguided psyches and how they adversely affect men and submarine otherwise great relationships.
Now, put the sexist police away. We certainly know there are times when men may certainly cause the issues, but suppress your outrage on this one. Think of this as informational, ladies. This can be a small look into what the average man thinks. And for the men out there, looking at some of the greatest issues men must overcome with their female counterparts will be one of those lightbulb moments in which you'll nod in agreement. Some problems are common while others may not have yet occurred in your relationship. Either way, we know that guys across the globe have dealt with a lot of these issues. It's batter-up for the married guys out there! These are 15 Wife Problems Every Guy Has.
15 My Way or Your Way?
Let's talk about parenting styles. Men and women often have different parenting styles when it comes to children. The variety in styles normally has to do with their upbringing. Men and women tend to parent in very different ways. Let's take the "you're trying to be their friend and not their father" approach because the two most common issues for men in parenting are being too mean or being too friendly. Let's go after the friendly one. A lot of times, a housewife turns into the drill sergeant in the house because she is there more often. She complains that her husband, who works a ton of hours, doesn't come down hard enough on the children when he's around. Again, there's a lot of gray here, but seeing things from the male vantage point in this situation, we have a father who isn't home too much and wants positive contact with his children. Holding your children accountable is important. But having positive interactions is equally important.
14 The In-Laws
Okay. Here we go. Ever see the movie Meet the Fockers? If you have, then you know what we're getting at here. In-laws are a byproduct of marriage. When you marry someone else, you're going to have to deal with your spouse's family. This can be dicey at times. For men and women, dealing with the in-laws can be difficult. Most men don't like to communicate with their own family, let alone their wife's family. This can be a MAJOR issue in a relationship. Nobody gets away clean on this one. Everyone has family members they wish they could hide in a closet or camouflage until after the wedding vows are exchanged. It's just a difficult part of the journey of being in a relationship. A wife's close relationship with her parents can sometimes be difficult to navigate as a man. Equally difficult can be a man's closeness with his mother and his wife's reactions to tense situations. We've all seen the father who doesn't think his son-in-law is good enough for his daughter and the mother-in-law who comes down hard on the wife for not being good enough for her son. Make no mistake about it: in-laws can be a treacherous hurdle with a ton of landmines in an evolving relationship and marriage.
13 To Have or Not To Have (The Kids Question)
Sometimes, this is the biggest deal-breaker of all time. Do you want kids? Do you not want to have any kids? Making this decision can be the most important life decision a couple makes, and additionally, one that creates by far the most resentment in a relationship. First, the have-nots. If a man wants a baby but the wife doesn't, it can be a tough slog. One, she has to carry the baby, and her emotional state and weight will greatly fluctuate for all time. Certainly, having a baby doesn't mean she's destined to be fat. What it means is that her body could change somewhat and there are also emotional and chemical changes that occur as well. For the parents, it tests their will, stress levels, and ability to work as a team. It's hard enough for two people to get along together without kids. Add the kid bomb to the mix, and things can get quite challenging. The baby question is often a deal-breaker in a lot of relationships with people disagreeing on the number of kids to have -- or if they'll have any at all.
12 Sexy Time
Sexual relations are oftentimes a core issue in relationships. Sometimes he wants it more than she wants it. Sometimes she wants it when he's tired after a long day of work. There are a variety of reasons why people have problems or "issues" having opportunities to get down with one another. Sexy time can be difficult, and it's the most personal of all activities shared by two individuals in a relationship. When you've been hammered at work and lack sleep, you're physically beat down. A woman being demanding sexually can be tough when you're falling asleep before you get home. A woman getting upset at you for not "initiating" contact can be a head-scratcher. You want her to be the aggressor, especially when you're exhausted. Men are not mind-readers. And certainly, a tired man would prefer to just chill out and watch television after being beaten down by life. This is where a woman breaking out her sexuality and being a little aggressive can be a nice turn on and a welcome change of pace.
11 Bathroom Time
If you're a man, then you know one of the few, and we mean VERY few, moments you have is when you close that door to the bathroom and have a moment of peace. There aren't many moments during the hectic days in which a man has quiet time alone. When you're married and have a family, it's certainly difficult to have time to disappear from the world, so your bathroom becomes the prime time to have quality moments to think and fall into world events, phone applications and even reply to an email or two. However, within a few moments of being in the bathroom, the knocking begins. Also, you'll hear your wife complain again and again about you taking more than a minute or two in there. If you've ever seen the movie, This is 40, this is a reoccurring thing in the movie, and it actually happens in real life. Men like their bathroom time, and women want them out.
10 Bathroom Door Open
Women are far more carefree overall. They grow more and more comfortable in relationships. But if you're married or have ever seen a relationship movie, then you know how this goes. Men will always shut the bathroom door. There is no question that we value that alone time. However, women want to share everything with their significant other. In fact, they don't care if they're sitting in the toilet; if they're talking, they want you listening. And as men, ladies, there are certain boundaries we do not want to cross. That is a threshold we don't need to step over. The bathroom should ALWAYS remain a private place. Don't drop a deuce in front of me! Don't start peeing while I'm in the shower. Let's have some private moments. Now, to be honest, the peeing thing isn't as crazy as the pooping. But women always seem to be the first to just kick that door open and stop keeping private toilet acts private.
We spoke about allowances earlier. And it's definitely true. Money is a very touchy topic within relationships. Generally, (and we only mean "in a greater number" or "in the majority of relationships"), the man is the more frugal of the two. This happens due to the fact that the men in these scenarios are the bread winners and don't like seeing their hard-earned money chipped away. Meanwhile, the push and pull between men and women to pick up chores in the home becomes a hot point in large part because one person makes more money than the other. Money and the stress it causes is the number one problem in relationships. If you get behind on bills, money is what tears two people apart and challenges the sanity of a couple. Due in large part to financial stresses and burdens carried by men, studies have shown that this is a big reason why men tend to live shorter lives than women. The increased stress directly affects men's hearts, thus causing higher levels of heart disease. It all boils down to money. And that shouldn't surprise many because some women growing up are taught to look for a man with a good job and money. It's an old way of thinking, but a way that is still very much in play in today's world. Does the term "Sugar Daddy" mean anything to anyone? Yeah, it lives well in today's world just as it did years before.
8 Midnight Special
Ah, the joys of parenthood. Sure, having a cute little guy or girl can make for a lifetime of happiness. But initially, it's a couple of years of stress and sleeplessness. Now, if you have, and can afford a nanny, you aren't allowed to be part of this discussion. But for the rest of the world, let's speak to those who "huff it" on the daily grind. For many men, working a 50-hour job (give or take) can take a toll. And bosses are asking for more and more of you while giving you less. Let's give a scenario where your wife isn't working or is able to take an extended leave to be at home with your new bundle of joy. Let's start talking about attempting to juggle a full work schedule and your wife wanting you to wake up multiple times a night to "split" the feeding schedule. It can be a difficult negotiation. Your wife expecting you to wake up in the middle of the night multiple times while your boss expects you to wake up at 6 AM for a rough 10-hour work day can be enough to break any man. And then, when you have the weekend, she expects you to increase your nightly load. This is one of the most difficult negotiations in a relationship in which a baby is brought on board. We honestly think men should take a late night feeding, but whoever is working should sleep the lion's share of the middle of the night. Hey, ladies, if you are working the full-time gig and your man is not working, then he should do the waking up. See, fair is fair. But, of course, it's widely accepted that the woman gets to hang out at home while the man earns the bacon. The stereotype still exists to this very day.
7 Houston, We Have A Problem
Communication can always be an issue. As a man, you have to be careful because, at any moment, your woman will try to make conversation whether you're deep in thought, typing an email, or working from home. She'll roll off information as if you're constantly focusing on her 24/7. This is a difficult moment because as you're attempting to finish your thought or work, she jumps right into a topic on the tip of her tongue. If you fail to respond or listen fully, you "aren't listening." Then an argument spirals into your lack of focus on anything and everything that is important to her. You have to tread lightly when taking this into consideration. You head down this road, and it can be WWIII. The key is to make sure that you leap into listening mode the second her mouth opens up, or there could be hell to pay. Just make sure to not take her bait and jump into a bigger argument over something so small. The secondary issue with communication is when women don't say what they mean and you have to read between the lines. That, in itself, can merit its own article.
6 Mountain Out Of A Molehill
One of the most epic problems a man has with his mate happens to be this particular topic. Now, historically, men have had the opinion that women tend to make something big out of something very small. And, yes, this is VERY true. Of course, there are usually deeper issues at play. See, what men don't always realize is that women may tend to harbor some deeper issues or resentments that lead to this little explosion. So she may be hammering away at you because you weren't listening to the two sentences or the short story she just shared with you, but she is loaded up with a lot to say. Certainly, she's going way over the top, and that's what women do best. They do make mountains out of molehills. But on the male side of things, it may be worthwhile to think if she's going Code Red on you because she's been building up to this moment for some time.
5 Your Needs
Think of this as Part 2 for the sexual dysfunctions that haunt men in their relationship with their women. A woman who prefers going to sleep at night rather than ever having relations with her husband can be a tough pill to swallow for a man who wants to be intimate with his wife. If it happens for a week, you can feel your personal contact with your significant other fading. If it happens for a month, you can taste the deterioration in the marriage. A woman who doesn't want to be intimate with her husband at all most certainly is either having an affair or isn't interested in sexual contact. Both instances are a major issue that needs to be explored further. You always want the best for you and your significant other. If needs of BOTH parties aren't met, you can bet the relationship could, and will, go sideways at some point. So, the gist is, understand each other and be sensitive to each other's wants and desires.
Okay, women get a tad bit annoyed when they're referred to as getting an "allowance" with regard to the spending money they can use. Some women make a joke of it because they have a sugar daddy. Meanwhile, other women do NOT enjoy being relegated to feeling small or demeaned just because they're full-time homemakers. These women feel as though they're entitled to spend the money the family brings in as a whole. Meanwhile, the breadwinners in this case, who are the men (and we know, not always, ladies...but in this scenario, they are), do not want their wives going around and spending all of their hard-earned money on whatever they want. Money and spending are always big problems between a husband and a wife. The stereotypes lend toward women spending money on fun small treats while the men are frustrated by the spending. But everything normally evens out. Men don't buy the small day-to-day stuff, but men certainly know how to drop coin on the big stuff. Men don't spend money as often (on average), but they do spend an equal amount overall. As with everything, keeping good communication and finding middle grounds are good habits to practice with your spouse.
3 House Duty
In every relationship, if two people are living together, this is bound to come up. It can be a speed bump on some days or a giant sinkhole on others. Dealing with house chores is never fun. Think of when you were a kid. Why did you do chores? A) Because you got paid, or B) Because your parents would beat your butt if you didn't. House chores can be challenging for both couples. First, if you're a guy and work 1-2 jobs, odds are you aren't home very much. And when you are home, you're exhausted from being the breadwinner. This is the scenario we will dive into because every situation is different. Your wife works maybe 15 hours a week or is a dedicated housewife. You do the solid 50-60 hours a week. You get home, and she wants you doing laundry or doing the dishes. She's taking care of the kids the majority of the time and doing 75% of the household chores. It's usually the last 25% that can get rough in this scenario. We all have to pitch in. So it's important to have balance at home as well. However, women often do not like to take into account that they're home far more in this scenario and tend to try and throw that back in their man's face. The guy works a lot more out of the house and makes more money, so he throws that back in her face. Everything is a compromise. You do your best. And if that doesn't work, hire a maid once a week and call it a day.
2 Thin or Fat
The untouchable of all topics has to be weight. With regard to men, we joke about it. Some guys like to flaunt that belly flab. They make jokes about having a "beer gut." Well, the joke may be on you, fat boy, because this street has two ways. Now, men, for the large part, are under the belief that all women need to stay in shape. If you think that way, then hold yourself accountable. I, for one, believe in health. Being 90 pounds is not healthy for any woman. Being 180 pounds is not healthy for ANY woman... unless she is 6' 10"; then we can talk. But staying close to your target weights for both men and women should be important. Men become highly critical of women and their weight. It's society, and its perception. And the truth is, perception for people IS reality. But men shouldn't get a free pass to be fat asses and throw stares and comments at their ladies. But ladies, stop being sensitive and start being real. If you're overweight, work out. Don't pretend it isn't happening. And definitely, don't get angry at your man for wanting you to be healthy. Now, if he starts demanding you sport a crazy thigh-gap and wear a size 1 or 2 dress, maybe kick his ass to the curb and see how his 40-inch gut does on the free market.
1 Boiling Rabbits
We always want to build a sense of trust. For relationships, trust is a big thing. If two people don't have the right amount of trust between them, it can be a difficult journey together. The trust issue generally pops up most because of terrible television shows in which everyone sleeps around. But to be fair, television is often a parity of reality, so we really can't say that bad things don't happen. In fact, if we stay in line with the scenarios above, a man working the majority of the time and a woman being at home most of the time, it's the man who is out and about, forming relationships and bonds with regularity. That, in itself, can drive a woman at home a bit nutty. Even a loyal, trustworthy man can be the focus of his wife's or girlfriend's jealous tone, and it seems to be amplified the more she sits at home. She will dive deep into that phone of yours and plow into your emails. So then you have men who get annoyed and start to password protect everything because that's "their" privacy. Look, in a relationship, two people must trust one another and have boundaries. Being an overly jealous person is never healthy, and women who live long hours at home while their man works generally fall victim to such behaviors. Certainly, each person can do quite a bit to quell jealous thoughts, but some jealousy is good in a relationship. It means that that person cares... but the "boiling bunnies" kind of jealous can be REAL bad.
Sources: webmd.com; askmen.com
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