If you think that all your friends and colleagues are happily married and that none of them would ever stray from their current partner, then think again. According to researchers, infidelity is one of America’s most popular pastimes, with between 30% and 60% of people cheating on their spouse or long-term partner during their relationship—and these figures are probably on the conservative side!
The reasons why people cheat vary widely, while men and women often have very different reasons for straying from the marital bed. Men are pretty shallow in their reasons, though. They cheat because the person they are cheating with is very attractive. Women, on the other hand, only have affairs when they feel that their current partner has stopped giving them the attention and support they need.
And then, of course, there is the other woman (or other man). What makes them get involved with someone who is married, knowing that their life is going to be full of drama, lies, and sneaking around? Luckily, many of those “homewreckers” have told us what life is like from the other side, via the popular app Whisper, where you can leave anonymous confessions about your crazy life.
15. She Realized He Was Married, Then Contacted The Wife
Sometimes, the so-called homewreckers are actually just as innocent as the man or woman who is being cheated on, as cheaters often don’t bother to mention the fact that they are married, until the relationship has been going on for weeks or even months. One woman who found out that she had actually been dating a married man decided that the only thing she felt was right to do was to come clean to the man’s wife. And years later, the two women still get coffee together from time to time. Needless to say, they both left his cheating a*s! Too bad…
14. He Stole His Wife’s Wedding Ring, Gifting His Girlfriend
This next Whisper user found herself a real charmer to have an affair with, didn’t she? His loyal wife, who was completely unaware that her husband had himself a bit on the side, thought that she had lost her treasured wedding ring. The truth is that he actually stole it and gave it to his girlfriend as a gift! I mean, this is so bad on so many levels. Never mind the ethics of re-gifting. Imagine what his poor wife went through thinking that she had lost the symbol of their loving relationship, unaware of what was really going on behind the scenes. We wonder if she left him once she found out what he’d done.
13. She Poked Holes To Get Pregnant And Trap The Guy
Some other women are happy to be just that—the girl on the side. Others can never quite get used to the fact that the man they love is going home to another woman night after night, even if that other woman is his wife! One slightly unhinged Whisperer decided to take matters into her own hands, by poking holes in the c*ndoms he used when they were together, with the inevitable conclusion that she fell pregnant. She believed that this would force her married man to leave his wife, but there are plenty of occasions when that plan has fallen flat on its face.
12. She Only Dated A Married Man Because She Thought All Men Cheat
This next Whisper user had a pretty bleak view of men and relationships. Believing that all men cheat eventually, she instead chose to date a married man even though she fell in love with him and wanted him to be her real boyfriend. Her choice to be the mistress seemed to be directly related to her low opinion of men. I can only guess that someone hurt her very badly at one time in the past. Perhaps she ought to give real love a chance though, as she’s certainly not going to find happiness as the other woman.
11. There Are Lots Of Secrets And Lies
Cheaters will say all kinds of stuff to justify their affairs, and that includes lying to their girlfriends as well as their wives. Be warned, though. If someone can lie so well they can get away with having an affair, then what makes you think you can spot when they’re telling a fib? One Whisperer found this out the hard way. Her married boyfriend had told her that he and his wife were in the middle of going through a divorce, which she later found out was completely untrue. Now, she was stuck in a bad relationship, wondering whether or not to tell his wife what had been going on.
10. The Side Chick Told The Wife She Was Ready For…
Perhaps our next confessor found the solution to ending homewrecking affairs for good. Her confession certainly suggested that she was either already sleeping with a married man or was at least thinking about getting involved with him, but that she avoided being a homewrecker by approaching his wife directly, to tell her that she was “down for a threesome.” Sadly, the confession doesn’t report the wife’s response to this generous invitation or whether she had any follow-up questions about how this forward young lady knew her husband. Perhaps not the solution we were all looking for after all.
9. She Thought Her Affair Wasn’t Cheating Because It Was Emotional
When is an affair not an affair? Our next confessor seems to think that it’s not really cheating if you don’t sleep together, describing her affair as an “emotional” one rather than a physical one. It would be interesting to see if the other man’s wife or her own husband saw things the same way, although at least this story had a happy ending for all concerned. The two provided “emotional” support for each other during difficult times in their respective marriages, but it seemed to do the trick. Both returned to their respective spouses and had themselves remain as friends.
8. It Was Worth It After All, They Got Married
Once all the drama is over, sometimes affairs can actually result in everyone getting what they want. In her confession, one Whisperer revealed that she is now engaged to her college professor. But it turns out, when they started seeing each other, he was still married, leading to her having a reputation as a homewrecker across campus. On the flipside, his ex-wife is happier without him. Although, given that this information comes from an ex-mistress, perhaps it should be taken with a pinch of salt. If she’s telling the truth, however, it does demonstrate that sometimes people stray because their marriages are genuinely unhappy.
7. Homewreckers Pass The Blame To Spouses Of Straying Partners
Being the other woman isn’t always the easiest role to play, and sometimes it is much easier if you can parcel at least some of the blame onto someone else’s shoulders. One Whisper user who had an affair with a married man decided that their fling wasn’t down to anything she had done–or even what he had done–but was all because of the behavior of his wife. It honestly takes some balls to blame a completely blameless woman for an affair, but some women seem to try it this way.
6. Affairs Are Not All About Bedroom Matters
There is a common misconception that affairs are all about between-the-sheets action, and while that is the be all and end all for some people, for others, there is a real emotional connection between them and their bit on the side. One woman confessed on Whisper that her boyfriend had recently split up with his wife. Cause for celebration, right? Wrong. He obviously took the breakup very hard and was missing his wife a lot. His girlfriend, who obviously cared for him a great deal, could see that it was hitting him very hard, and she ended up feeling terrible to see him so upset.
5. A Homewrecker Doesn’t Care As Long As She’s Treated Better Than The Wife
Some Whisperers seem to feel that they have a much better time being the other woman than being their guy’s wife or girlfriend. There are plenty of Whisper confessions which suggest that being the girl on the side has a lot more advantages. Your guy pays you more attention both inside and outside of the bedroom, and he also loves the fact that you seem willing to give him 100% of your attention, unlike a bored wife who has long lost interest. One Whisper confessor described this as win/win. She got an attentive partner and he, in turn, had a s*xually experimental girl in the bedroom.
4. Being The Other Woman Is Not Worth The Stress And Complications
Perhaps the most important lesson to learn from being the other woman is that it is no way to live your life. One Whisper user admitted that being a mistress was the most stressful thing she ever did, but that it taught her to appreciate what she deserved from the guys in her life, while others confessed that they would no longer date a guy who was too frightened to introduce her to his friends. Either he would be his one and only woman or he could kick the curb. Being a side chick may not be great for anyone, but it sure seems to teach you lots about how to approach future relationships.
3. Pregnant Wife Found Out About The Affair…
Now, some women might not have much of a guilty conscience when it comes to sleeping with married men, but it seems that the situation changes dramatically when the married man’s wife is pregnant at the time. Why is it somehow worse that a guy has cheated on his pregnant wife? And things only got worse for our next Whisper user, when the pregnant wife was so distraught about the affair that she actually went and got an abortion. The other woman found it difficult to live with the guilt, but we think that maybe she should have thought about that before jumping into bed with a married man.
2. Once A Cheater, Always A Cheater
Sometimes, affairs do become full-blown relationships. The man or woman leaves their spouse and the bit on the side becomes their one and only partner. A dream come true, right? Well, not for the next Whisper user on this list. Her married beau was up for leaving his wife so that they could be together as real boyfriend and girlfriend. There’s just one problem—she didn’t feel she’d ever be able to trust him if they were to end up together. After all, once a cheater, always a cheater. This old adage has even been backed up by scientific fact!
1. Men Raise Children That Are Not Theirs After Wives’ Affairs Resulted In Pregnancy
One Whisper user summed up reality for a lot of side girls when she admitted that even though she knew her affair with a married man was wrong, she didn’t regret it for one moment because of the daughter they had together. Statistics suggest that 3% of children are born as a result of extramarital affairs. Some are born to the girlfriends and must be brought up in a confusing situation with an ever-resentful mom and a dad who only visits fleetingly, while others are born to wives who have had affairs and who are often raised unknowingly by their cuckolded husbands as their own child.
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