Tinder is a great way to meet new people. Particularly if you only want to meet them for the night. Then again, lots of people use it as a way to potentially meet their future life partner, so whichever camp you fall into, you’ll want to make sure that you are doing all the right things to attract as many people as possible.
Unfortunately, the average guy seems to know as much about girls as a potato does. How else can you explain all the mistakes they make that are sure to turn a girl off instantly? If you are a Tinder user, there’s an extremely high chance that someone who was interested in you got turned off and swiped onto someone else because of something you did.
So, how do you avoid these mistakes and maximize your pulling power in the future? By reading our list, of course, and making sure that you never commit any of these faux-pas again. Be honest with yourself –if you’re guilty, you’re guilty. At least now you will know what you are doing wrong in order to correct it for the future.
These are the 15 things you are doing on Tinder that turn girls off the second that you do them. Read on, take in the information, and let it digest. Then go overhaul your Tinder profile, since you know by now that it needs it. The good news is that once you’re done, there are a whole lot of new girls out there waiting for you.
15. Putting Movie Quotes In ‘About Me’
So, yes, everyone has seen Anchorman and everyone loves it. Okay? Now let’s all just get over that fact and start using our brains to write our own about me sections rather than copying and pasting the same ‘hilarious’ quotes over and over again. It’s not funny, and actually, it’s a massive turn-off. You might as well not write anything in there. It’s the equivalent of just posting a picture of yourself with the Anchorman DVD in your hand. It’s not even an obscure reference. No one is going to know anything about you from that comment, except the fact that you are too lazy to even describe yourself. Keep your eye on the end-game here. Your About Me is supposed to be enticing, not off-putting. Sort it out.
14. Group Pictures Only
If your gallery shows you with a group of your best buds, then that’s kind of sweet. It’s clear that you are deeply rooted in your friends, that you are a popular guy, and that you have a lot of loyalty. Unfortunately, this is going to turn girls off in two ways. First of all, they can’t tell which one of the group is you, because there are too many people in the picture (hint: more than one). Secondly, once they do work out who you are, they’re going to wonder if you ever go anywhere without your friends. Are they involved in every part of your life? Do you ever go anywhere without them? Are they going to interfere with your potential budding relationship? If so then boy, bye. And there go your chances.
13. Talking Down To Her In Messages
There are some guys out there who think it’s really smart to send a girl messages about how she isn’t hot enough for them yet. About how if she cleaned herself up a little, or went to the gym, or put makeup on, you might be interested in her. This isn’t cool, and it’s actually really hurtful. You could end up doing severe psychological damage to someone who isn’t ready for that kind of criticism. A strong girl who believes in herself is just going to tell you to get lost, and rightly so. If you’re going to be like that, just don’t talk to anyone. You’ll get the same results on your end: staying in all night alone. At least this way you don’t negatively impact anyone else’s life. This is never going to work as a tactic.
12. Asking For Full-Body Photos
There’s a reason that guys ask for full-body photos, and it isn’t a kind one. It’s because you want to check that a girl isn’t fat. Look, we get it, you probably have standards that you want to uphold in an ideal world. But there’s trying to uphold standards, and then there’s just being rude. You can judge a girl’s size easily enough just by looking at her face and shoulders. You don’t need to make an obsessive point out of it. And guess what, if a girl does have a little bit more weight than you expected, it doesn’t automatically make her an ugly troll. Asking for photos for that reason does make you one, however. Most girls are going to be disgusted enough to stop talking to you, or they will fob you off with excuses as to why they can’t take the photo, in which case you don’t get what you want anyway.
11. Sending Unsolicited Pics
You know the kind of pictures that we mean. We’re not talking about fluffy bunnies or selfies of your face. We’re talking about when you take a photograph intended to show off how big you are in the trouser department, or how horny she makes you, and then send it off. This is not attractive in any way, shape or form. First off, your trouser snake probably doesn’t even look that nice. Second, a lot of them tend to look very similar when it comes down to it. Third, this should be a nice surprise that she encounters when you get into bed together. She doesn’t need a preview. It’s creepy, it’s gross, and it’s handing her some blackmail material that you can count on showing up on Google if you ever become even remotely famous.
10. Making Obvious Photoshop Mistakes
Imagine a girl looking through your photos. She thinks about how big your biceps are, and how great your six-pack is. Then she looks a little bit closer, and sees the distortion effect on the background of the image. Yep, you’ve just been caught making a Photoshop blunder. This category also includes the trick of using really old photos from when you were 21 if you’re now 43. Just be yourself. You can’t exactly bring Photoshop along with you or hold a photo in front of your face when you meet up in person. All you are doing is guaranteeing yourself some heartbreak, either when girls swipe left or when they meet you and then make an excuse to leave because you lied about who you are. You won’t get away with it.
9. Pictures With Celebrities
This is another absolute no-no. Why would we want to see an image of you with a celebrity? One of three things is going to happen when a girl looks at that photo. One, she has no idea who the person is and thinks you’re just posing weirdly with a mate. Two, she looks at the famous man and decides that he is richer, better-looking, and more appealing than you, so she swipes away and goes back to daydreaming. Three, she worries about matching up to that famous girl (you’re obviously into Rita Ora but this girl is a redhead with pale skin and so clearly she isn’t even your type so there’s no point in trying anyway, and anyway Rita is gorgeous, etc.). Just keep it to pictures of yourself.
8. Pictures With Babies Or Girls
If you have a picture of yourself holding a baby, you might think that the cuteness factor will overload the ovaries of any girl seeing it and make you a sure thing. Sadly, you’re wrong. What happens instead is that they wonder endlessly about whether it’s your child, what you’re doing with it if it isn’t, and whether you have a thing for children, which makes you a definite no-no.
It’s the same thing when you have photos with a lot of different girls in your gallery. Who wants to sign up to your merry-go-round of endless women? You might be a player, but you don’t have to advertise it. Pictures of yourself are the done thing, so if you can, you might even want to crop other people out and keep the focus on yourself.
7. Short And Pointless Messages
You send a message saying “hi”. She says “hi” back. Now what? You’ve got to keep your messages a bit longer and keep the conversation moving. Ask a question, or introduce yourself with a pertinent fact that she might enjoy. If it feels like the conversation is slowing down, don’t just answer her questions with one-word answers and leave it at that. At the very least, you can add “how about you?” at the end and find out the answer to the question from her side. Even if you don’t really care. It’s called making conversation, and if you don’t do it, then most of your chats are going to go nowhere. At the very least, if you’re going to be that kind of guy, just dive in with an invite for her to come over to yours – that way you’ll skip the awkward small talk and the ones who don’t like a direct approach will leave.
6. Being A Douchebag
For some reason, guys think that it’s okay to say douchey things on their profiles because it will somehow magically filter out all of the girls who aren’t their type. They’ll add things like, “if you don’t look like your profile, you’re buying the drinks until you do”. Or they’ll go a step further with comments like, “ugly girls not wanted”, etc. All you are doing is broadcasting how much of a douche you are. Any normal, intelligent girl with self-esteem will swipe left. If all you want are the crazy chicks and girls who are liable to cry in the bedroom, then go ahead and be a douchebag. If you want to actually meet nice girls, who might actually be someone you like for real, then just stop it. Be a normal human being. Don’t type anything that you wouldn’t say to someone’s face.
5. Too Many Action Shots
This is another photo complaint because, yes, they are hugely important. When a girl is deciding whether to swipe left or swipe right she just has a tiny bit of information to go on. She doesn’t talk to you first, she just swipes. So, this means that a lot of things are useless in your photos. Action shots of you taking part in your favorite hobbies might be interesting conversation starters, but if they don’t show your face, they tell her next to nothing. You can include one or two of these, but not every single photo. After all, she won’t be dating or hooking up with you while you are paragliding or boxing or fishing or whatever it is that you do. She wants to see your face because ultimately that’s what matters on a dating app.
4. Not Talking At All
You matched with a girl – great news! So, what now? Do you just sit back and wait for her to send a message? Sadly, this may rule you out of the race before you even enter it. You need to make an effort. While, yes, there are some girls that will message you first, others won’t. This comes down to a question of whether you really want to meet that girl or not. If you do, then you’d better pull your finger out and send her a message. If you don’t, then why did you swipe right in the first place? Sort your priorities out – and if you’re too scared to talk to her, just remember that you are already doing the worst possible thing by ignoring her. Talking has to be at least a little bit better, even if it all goes wrong.
3. Negging On Swipe Left-ers
Don’t include a comment about how everyone that swipes left on you is dumb, or ugly, or blind, and so on. Just, really, don’t do it. All you are doing is showing everyone that you’re an insecure jerk. When you already make negative comments about people right on your profile, a girl knows exactly what to expect on a date with you: lots of lovely criticism. Negging is not new, and everyone on the dating scene knows about it, so how you think it still works is beyond us. It’s a see-through tactic which turns girls off immediately. If you have a comment like this on your profile, just delete it. Focus on the girls who swipe right, rather than issuing vague threats and insults to people who aren’t interested in you anyway.
2. Being Too Coy And Cutesy
Sometimes you might want to be a bit coy and reply with a “maybe” instead of disclosing the full answer to a question. Sometimes you might want to be a bit cutesy and fill your messages with winking faces and emojis. Guess what? This gets really old after a while. It’s fine to flirt a little, but try to actually have a conversation. Try this trick: take off the emoji and see if your message has any valuable content by itself. If yes, you can add the emoji back on. If not, you need to work on your conversational abilities rather than picking out emojis. It makes you look like a teenage boy – and all those maybes make you sound like someone with something to hide, like maybe a wife.
1. Talking Forever With No Result
You might get to chat with a girl that you really like the look of. She chats back, and soon you find out that you have a lot in common. You get along like a house on fire, and you can talk for hours. Those hours turn into days, which turn into weeks, or even months – before suddenly she’s not so keen to talk anymore. It’s probably because of her new boyfriend. If you talk to a girl endlessly on Tinder without ever asking her out, she’s going to wonder why you aren’t interested in her like that and then move on. Tinder is for hook-ups – we all know that. They don’t have to be cheap and meaningless, but they are expected to happen. Take her chattiness for a sign and do something before she gets bored.
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