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15 Tattoos That Will Make It Sure You Don’t Get A Date

High Life
15 Tattoos That Will Make It Sure You Don’t Get A Date

The decision to get a tattoo is one of the most important decisions you can make in your life. While you can get it removed or covered up, it’s often an incredibly painful and expensive process. And as you’ll see from some of our entries, like the man who has a giant spider tattooed on his face, there’s just no way to get that altered enough to look good.

There should be no question in your mind if getting a tattoo is something worth saving up for. It’s probably a bad idea to get Katy Perry‘s album cover placed all over your back, but things get a lot worse when you learn that aspiring fans spent less on that tattoo than you probably earned this week at work.

Speaking of work, we hope many of these people have thought about potential career ramifications. But don’t worry, one man who tattooed an image of his infant son’s face literally on the side of his own face, said he has it all figured out – Welfare!

Katy Perry’s album cover isn’t the only tribute to the stars. We have one fan who wanted to immortalize Justin Bieber‘s infamous mug shot, someone who is far too into Michelle Keegan and another who makes it very clear which ‘team’ from Twilight she backs.

And while celebrities and their own awful ink mostly escape our list, you’ll definitely understand why Lady Gaga‘s latest lover’s ink of her face deserved to take up a spot, especially if he ever finds himself single again.

15. Sorry Buddy, We Can Still Tell You’re Balding

One of the biggest things that men can be insecure about is their hair. Look no further than characters like George Costanza from Seinfeld who was always good for at least one or two great bald jokes an episode. And when you look at the above photo, it’s hard not to get the impression that this man also might have some insecurities about what is on the top of his head.

Though the fact that he has thick dreadlocks makes the photo perhaps all the more confusing to try and decipher. At the very least he looks incredibly pleased with himself for this decision. Why? We haven’t quite figured that out. But you do you, buddy!

14. The Louis Vuitton Logo All Over Your Arm Is Classy, Right?

Regardless of your opinion on the company, it’s evident that Louis Vuitton is one of the most luxurious brands in society. With over $10 billion in revenue in 2016, that’s something that is also probably not going to change anytime soon.

But despite the success of the brand, do you think it was a good decision for this gentleman to get his entire arm tattooed up in their logo? Probably not!

Maybe this guy thought that it would give his body an extra classy and elegant look. The reality, however, may be that all the Louis Vuitton clothing and accessories in the world will be unable to help him land a lady.

13. Taking His Love For His Child Too Far

If you have a child, it definitely wouldn’t be considered too unusual to have a tattoo that represents them somewhere on your body. But that place on your body should not be on your face. Especially when it literally takes up half of it. Adding to the tattoo’s history is the wearer’s fool-proof plan of getting through life by receiving welfare.

There’s a chance the mother of the child loved the idea and they’re still together, but if not, that may be a tough tattoo for any future partner to overlook. Especially because there is also a very real chance that together or not, that the mother was less than pleased with his decision.

12. “Your Beautiful” Tattoo Makes People Think You’re Stupid

There are many different words that you can use to describe how a woman looks. Perhaps you like calling a woman gorgeous, sexy, or beautiful. With this next woman though, it seems like you better make sure you stick to just saying that she is beautiful.

You’d hate to go against a tattoo that is that emphatic on the phrase! But if you’re going to get a tattoo that takes up the size of your arm, you might want to make sure it is grammatically correct. Making matters worse is the fact that there really doesn’t seem like enough space to fix the usage of “your”!

11. Why Not Get Katy Perry’s Album On Your Back?

Who doesn’t love getting down with some of Katy Perry’s music? Well, lots of people, actually. But one person who must do it on a regular basis is this fan who elected to get Katy Perry’s album cover from One of the Boys tattooed on her back.

It’s really hard to understand the mindset of getting tattoos of celebrities. You can imagine it must be incredibly weird for the celebrity to see, especially in this instance where the fan has allegedly met Perry on multiple occasions.

Perry is pretty outspoken however about her love of her fanbase, so perhaps she was all for the idea!

10. There’s Something On Your Face

The sad look on this man’s face should say it all. It’s completely acceptable to get a tattoo of an animal on you. But even if your favorite animal was something more pleasant to look at, like a puppy, getting the decision to have it tattooed all over your face is not going to be one that people typically recommend.

You can imagine this tattoo would look even more unusual if the gentleman decided that he wanted to try and grow a beard. Let’s hope that prior to getting the tattoo that he had the love and support of a caring partner because if not, we cannot imagine too many people seeing that image on Tinder and giving him a swipe in the positive direction!

9. Justin Bieber’s Mugshot

Justin Bieber has done many stupid things in his life. But the dumbest may have been back in 2014 when he was arrested for several violations including driving without a license, driving while under the influence and resisting arrest. Bieber apparently thought the whole thing was hilarious though, or at least that was the impression given by his smiling mugshot.

It was one of the most “punchable” moments of Bieber’s face, and why someone would choose to get it immortalized on them is beyond us. Say goodbye to any future dates with Bieber fans at the very least, but even if you hate Bieber, you may still find yourself hating on this tattoo.

8. A Revealing Fan Tattoo Of Michelle Keegan Isn’t Getting You A Date

There were many people who were sad that Michelle Keegan’s character wasn’t sticking around for longer on the soap opera Coronation Street. But at least she didn’t fall down an elevator shaft like Dr. Drake Ramoray!

One fan who must have been particularly devastated is this fan who elected to get her tattooed on his arm. The fact that the tattoo also ramps up the cleavage element also makes the whole thing even more of a disaster. We do have to give some huge props to Keegan for smiling along for the photo when the fan tracked her down.

Outside of perhaps recognizing her from Coronation Street, Keegan also stars in Our Girl and in 2015 was named the sexiest girl in the world by FHM.

7. Would You Go Out With Mr. Cool Ice?

In the world of bad tattoos, one of the most infamous on the internet has to be the “Mr. Cool Ice” guy. Hailing from Germany, he has admitted in a past interview that the tattoos that cover his body ran him roughly $6,000.

We’re not too sure if he just started with one design and then was like “Heck yeah! I need this on even more of my body!” or knew going in that he was going to get it all done, but at the very least this had to be multiple sessions. Which means that we hope he thought about the idea long and hard before subjecting to what is apparently his nickname all over his body.

6. You Better Believe She Isn’t Eating Meat!

One of the biggest stereotypes about being a vegan is that you tend to be incredibly outspoken about it. And perhaps there is nothing wrong with that. It’s obviously something that is going to impact several different areas of your life. And if you’re dating someone, the fact that they’re a vegan is definitely something that you need to take into consideration.

But we don’t know if you’d be able to handle a conversation, much less a relationship, with someone who is as emphatic about veganism as the woman in the above photo. We don’t know if one vegan tattoo would be a good idea, it’s amazing that this person decided to go ahead with several.

5. This Rebel Is One Cool Dad

When it comes to this above gentleman, it definitely at least appears like all of his tattoos appear to be from the same artist. We don’t know if that necessarily makes them good though! Especially considering the only tattoo that he elected to get colored in is one of a Confederate flag.

Though to be fair, one of his tattoos does say “Dad”, so perhaps his fine man is actually off the market! Either way, let’s hope his child (or children) don’t look up to their dad as inspiration for what a tremendous tattoo looks like or they may find themselves sorely disappointed when they ask others for their opinion.

4. You Better Believe She Is Team Edward, Not Team Jacob

There are many actors out there who don’t happen to be fans of some of their biggest and most successful films. Such is the case with Robert Pattinson, who has been outspoken in the past about his distaste for the character of Edward from the Twilight series. But hey, if they’re willing to throw millions of dollars at you, who are you to say no?

But that means that if this super fan ever tracked down Pattinson to show off her tattoo, he might seriously find himself weirded out. But that may also be the feeling you get if you show up on a date with her and she busts this bad boy out.

God, imagine if you were Team Jacob?!

3. Taking His Love For Insane Clown Posse Too Far

When it comes to our next entry, it might be worth explaining the “look” that this man was trying to achieve. While many people cannot stand Insane Clown Posse, those who do, are clearly very passionate about it. There might not be any fan out there whoever who is more dedicated to the group than this fan; whose tattoo is reminiscent of the face-paint that you’ll often see on the band and fans at shows.

Perhaps he thought that level of commitment to the band would guarantee him some sweet action whenever he was able to attend one of their shows? God help him if he ever tried to get a date with someone who didn’t love the band though.

2. Energy Monster Drinks Aren’t As Extreme As This Guy

Nothing pumps up a late-night gaming session like making sure you have your fridge well-stocked with some Monster Energy Drinks. But sometimes you get so invested in the game, you forget that you have some. Have no fear though, that risk goes down dramatically if you have the Monster logo tattooed on you.

And maybe that’s just what this guy was trying to achieve? Or maybe he was just really passionate about the brand and thought getting it tattooed on him may earn him some free drinks from the company.

Better not piss him off though, I mean just check out that gun tattoo on his hip.

1. Christian Carino’s Tattoo Of Lady Gaga’s Face

We suppose with this entry, we suppose we have to preface. Christian Carino will have no problem getting dates the rest of his life alongside his fiancé Lady Gaga. But if they ever break up, he might be in for some really lonely nights. That is unless he gets his recent tattoo of her face covered up.

It’s always a bold move to tattoo your loved one on you (is bold the right move?), but given the up and down nature of Hollywood relationships, this may end up being one costly (and expensive) mistake. Especially given that at the moment, their relationship is still under one year old.

Gaga previously dated Taylor Kinney for over 5 years (they were engaged for a little over 1 year). We wonder if he was ever inspired to throw a tattoo of her on his body?

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