One second you’re having fun and the two of you can’t keep your hands off of each other and the next: something has changed. You can’t quite put your finger on it, but your relationship doesn’t feel the same anymore. You begin to get that nagging feeling that something terrible is about to happen in your relationship. You feel like you’re doing something wrong all the time. She appears distant and arguments begin popping up all over the place. Those fuzzy feelings that you once had at the beginning of your relationship have been replaced with a dark cloud. You know what’s coming, but you’re still not quite sure. Is she going to break up with you?
Well, the good news is that there are plenty of signs that the relationship is over in her eyes. If she feels that you two are headed for an end, there will be little subliminal messages that she’ll send you. Some will be more noticeable than others and some you might even send yourself. Consider that it’s human nature. We express how we feel with more than just words. It can be with our body language, where our attention goes, and how we treat a person. When it comes to whether or not someone is about to dump you, the rules are still the same. We’ll still send signs.
We’ve rounded are the top 15 signs that you’re about to be dumped. Read them. Keep them. And, see how your relationship stands up to these signs. If you’re noticing that you’re ticking off more on this list, then you might want to make the move and have the dreaded chat with your significant other.
15. She Cancels Plans At The Last Minute
It never fails, whether you make plans three weeks in advance or the day before, she always has an excuse for why the two of you can’t meet. And, guess what? This cold or paper she has to finish for school always seems to pop up at the last minute. Sure, one time could mean that it’s legitimate. But, if she’s cancelled on you a few times, she’s struggling with her feelings that are telling her you’re not the one. When we’re interested in someone, we’ll make time just to be with him or her. And, we won’t cancel last minute, but will be courteous to let you know beforehand and will have a plan in place how to make it up to you. If your girl is avoiding you by changing her mind last minute, take it is a clear sign that a break-up is in your future.
14. That ‘I Need Space, But We’re Not Breaking Up’ Speech
This is probably one of the most hated speeches of all-time because it is utter bull. It’s a carefully orchestrated lie for people too afraid to make a decision and deal with it. Being in a relationship is about growing and living life together. It’s not hiding in a cave waiting for the perfect moment when you two can perfectly be together. Life isn’t perfect. People aren’t perfect. And, if you two need space instead of working through a tough time together your relationship isn’t going to last anyway. It’s better just to have a clear break instead of pretending and staying in some state of flux where neither of you know what’s going on. You’ll thank yourself later for not wasting time on something that was bound not to work out.
13. She Picks Petty Fights
You didn’t text her in the morning. You didn’t let her choose the movie. You let her choose the movie. And, then there was that time that she somehow managed to start an argument about your socks. Your relationship is beginning to feel like you can’t do anything right. And, guess what? You are right. She’s frustrated and these tiny arguments she’s sparking are her way of getting it all out. Unfortunately, she’s probably hoping that one of them will light a fire to the words, ‘we’re breaking up’. When people are happy in relationships they’ll ‘pick n’ choose’ their fights to ensure that everyone stays happy. If she’s feeling like it’s over, then all that anger will flare up every time you breathe too loudly until she finally explodes that it’s over. You’re better off sitting down where you two can calmly end it without yelling.
12. Your Gut Feeling
Call it a sixth sense, because sometimes that’s just what that feeling in your gut is. If you have a feeling that your relationship is over, even if you can’t quite put your finger on what’s wrong, then chances are that it’s likely to be over. She hasn’t said anything and you two still hang out, but you feel like something is off. You may have even tried to fix a few things in your relationship. It doesn’t seem to work and you don’t feel the same way that you did when you two first started dating. The sparks and butterflies are gone and now every time you two meet for coffee, you have a gnawing feeling that the ‘break-up’ speech is coming. Our advice to you is to trust your gut and have a sit down yourself, or if you don’t suffer from anxiety, patiently wait for that break-up coffee.
11. She Calls Less Often
In the beginning of your relationship, it feels as if you two can’t step away from your phones for a minute. You find yourself getting sappy with cute ‘good morning’ messages and she calls you almost every day. All of a sudden you two go days without speaking to each other. You’re confused because you used to be the person that she wanted to talk to more than anyone else. She told you everything about her life. Now, she barely has anything to say to you. Take it as a clear sign that the connection you once had is lost and that her feelings might be elsewhere. You no longer deserve her full attention or to know about the funny thing that happened in the morning or a call just so she can hear your voice. Basically, she’s just not that into you anymore.
10. She Forgets Your Anniversary
It’s not a good sign when your significant other doesn’t care enough to remember your anniversary. In fact, your birthday, your anniversary, and even Valentine’s Day mean nothing to her. She’s not into your relationship and you might even wonder why she’s with you in the first place. Sure, there are those girls out there who just aren’t that romantic. But, when it comes to being courteous and caring about someone in your life, most decent people can remember a one-year anniversary. You’re not going to freak out if she forgets that you two have been dating for a one-month, but once you pass that one-year mark, she should remember. If you need another sign that she’s just not that into you, then take a hint that your girlfriend forgets that the two of you are dating.
9. You’re Never Able To Reach Her
Sometimes you feel like the annoying co-worker she tries to avoid. Whether you text or call, you still get no answer. She doesn’t care to let you know what she’s doing Saturday night and when she’s late for your dates you get no text or warning about what’s she been up to. Don’t even think about asking her to go with you to take her dog to the vet. She’s MIA and you find it easier to get in touch with your friends from college (even though they live across the country) than your girlfriend. Now, we’re not saying that she has to check in with you like she’s on a leash, but when you’re in a functioning relationship you should be able to reach each other. At least she could give you a call back when she sees that she missed your call.
8. You’re Not Intimate As Much
Sure, you might still be doing it. Yet, it’s not nearly as often as it was in the beginning. For some couples, that’s okay, especially if you find that the quality has improved even if the quantity has decreased. Although, if your relationship fits into the other category where you’re not only less intimate but you also find that it’s a little lackluster, then that’s a sign that the sparks that were once there have faded. Try talking to your partner. See if there is a new move you two would be interested in trying out or maybe she just likes her neck being stroked a certain way. There could even be an unresolved argument that makes her feel insecure. Although, if there is nothing you can do to improve your romantic life, your relationship might be headed for the rocks.
7. Unresolved Fights
You two have problems and you don’t think you can solve them. Actually, you didn’t really try. Sorry to break it to you, but that’s a bad idea because it leaves nothing but bad blood. Problems need to be solved. You two have to talk it out, maybe even cry a little, and both people in the relationship have to feel confident that they’re moving forward. We know, it sounds like a lot, but if you don’t those wounds will fester until they’re brought up in an argument later down the road. And, that never feels good, especially if she’s had time to think about. Focusing on negative situations never leads to happy endings. Negativity leads to sour feelings and relationships that end in a split because someone didn’t say sorry.
6. She Looks Happier Without You
Have you seen Meghan Markle and Prince Harry together? She looks like the happiest girl in the world when her prince is around. And, your girlfriend should also light up when you (her prince) is around. If you notice that beaming smile only pops up when someone else is present or when you’re not around (as a mutual friend let you know), then you might have a break-up coming. If her smiles are directed towards someone else, then chances are she likes that person more than she likes you. You could also just make her miserable, especially if she’s not that into you. Either way, it’s not looking good for your relationship if she’s not beaming with happiness when you’re around. Take it as a sign that you’re headed for nights alone with Tinder. But, rest assured that at least she’s found something that makes her happy.
5. Everything Seems More Important Than You
She cancels plans. She doesn’t call. She even takes a long call in the middle of you telling a story about an important moment in your life. Honestly, it feels like anything that has to do with you is put on the back burner. You’re not important in her life, even if you once were. Even her one-year-old niece’s birthday party is more important than spending time with you. If you’re feeling like this is where you’re at, know that you deserve more. You need someone in your life that carves out time to be with you. You deserve someone who pays attention to you and your needs. That’s kind of why you’re in a relationship, to begin with. If she’s not showing that she cares about including you in her life, then you might be better off moving on.
4. You’re Getting Your Needs Fulfilled Elsewhere
When you’re not getting the attention and affection that you need, you’re bound to look for it elsewhere. If you find yourself spending more time on the phone with a different lady friend or turning to someone else first instead of your girlfriend, something is wrong in your relationship. Basically, it’s about to end. By not spending time together and being there for each other’s emotional needs, you’re setting each other up for falling into the open arms of someone else. And, if someone else is fulfilling you emotionally or physically, then chances are she might do the same. So, don’t be surprised if one day she comes to you with the revelation that she has fallen for someone else. You might have already fallen for someone else too.
3. You’re No Longer A Part Of Her Future
We hate to break it to you, but if her plans about the future have gone from making you a part of her life to moving cross-country alone, then chances are your relationship is headed for a screeching halt. Subconsciously, she has already cut you out of her life, even if she hasn’t admitted it to herself (or you) just yet. You should be especially wary if you two have been dating for a long period of time and none of her future plans includes you. She doesn’t’ necessarily have to talk about having kids with you. Although, when it comes to moving to a new city, taking a yearlong sabbatical, or buying a house, you should expect to be included in her life plans. After all, if the point of your relationship isn’t’ to live, grow, and be together then you’re basically moving towards a future alone.
2. You Can’t Agree On Major Life Decisions
She wants kids. You don’t. She wants to move back to Missouri and buy a house close to her parents. Los Angeles is more your style. Whenever it comes to making life’s big decisions, your plans never quite match up. Sure you two might agree on what you want for breakfast, but when it comes to how you’re going to live your lives, you’re as different as a duck and an elephant. So, what do you do when you find that the girl you’re with is incompatible? Well, you might want to make plans to move out if you haven’t’ done so already. If she doesn’t find that you’re headed down the same life path as her, she’s probably already thinking about putting your stuff in a box and finding someone else who shares the same life goals that she does.
1. Romance Has Come To A Halt
Forget candlelit dinners or dates out. You two have hit a slump of Netflix and take-out on the couch. Vacations together don’t exist and when you do actually do something fun or new it’s never with your girlfriend. In fact, you two don’t do or say anything romantic. Your relationship feels lifeless, dry, and neither of you cares too much to make an effort to bring some romance back into your lives. If she doesn’t seem to care too much about changing the situation, then she probably sees the relationship headed for the rocks as much as you and is preparing to dump you after yet another night watching a show on Netflix. It pays to mix it up a bit and relationships that constantly feel stagnant and boring will never satisfy a girl for long.
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