So you’re dating someone new, and things have been going great. Or maybe it is even someone you have been going out with a long time, but either way, lately something has been off and there is only one thing that makes sense. She is stealing from you. You keep missing money, whether it is some of the quarters missing from your change jar, or when you wake up in the morning there is 20 bucks less in your wallet than their should be. Maybe there are even a few ATM transactions that you don’t remember on your latest bank statement.
I know that it seems totally crazy to even suspect it. Hey you are really into this woman, or at the least she is someone that you think of as a really close friend, how could she possibly be stealing from you? It isn’t like you are stupid, right? I mean you have great taste in women. Well, okay all of your relationships have been train wrecks, but you get the point.
Well here is a pro tip my man. Check out the list below. If the chick you are hanging out with has a couple on this list, then whatever, she is human, who cares. If she has 5 or 6 then she is almost certainly stealing from you or she will in the future. Any more than 5 or 6? Well congrats you are living with a sociopath. Forget about stealing, run as fast as you can before she kills you.
Here are 15 signs she is stealing money from you.
15. She Tells You She has Stolen Before
I know that love is blind and when we are all wrapped up in it we tend to overlook some things. Don’t overlook this one. If she tells you that she has stolen in the past, and tells the story in a funny way, it is a huge red flag. It also is a red flag if she does things like shoplift. I had a girlfriend once who always would walk out with her coffee without paying for it at a local cafe we went to. She always acted like the whole thing was so funny, and not a big deal. Here is the thing though, if she has no morals about stealing from other people, why do you think she won’t steal from you? Everyone always thinks they are special when they are hanging out with someone that lies, cheats and steals. Guess what? You aren’t.
14. She Lies About Little Things
You know how some people are liars and some are not? It really is pretty much that simple, some people lie and some don’t. But then there is another category too, the people that lie about little things that really don’t mean anything. So most people get someone that lies when being accused of a crime, accused of cheating on someone, or accused of something that could get them fired from their job. Is it a cool thing to do? No, but we get it. But then there is a different kind of liar, the kind that just lies about what kind of sandwich they had for lunch. You might ask them “Hey, do you like Breaking Bad?” and they might say they did, when in reality they hate it. This type of person is way more likely to be stealing from you then most.
13. Her Past Does Not Add Up
This is a big sign of someone who is untrustworthy, and could very well be a thief. People that steal always want to throw you off so you don’t suspect them when things go down later on. So how do they do that? Well they do it in a lot of ways. They might tell you that they went to college when they were a high school drop out, they might say they write poetry when they can barely string two words together, they might tell you that they broke up with their ex because he was psycho, when in reality he broke up with her because she was stealing from him. You get the point, they try and paint a picture of themselves that makes them look different than they really are, so you don’t suspect them of anything.
12. Small Amounts of Money are Missing
Usually situations like this start small, although not always. It often starts when you notice that your change jar seems to have far less money in it then it did before, or maybe you might notice a couple of bucks are missing from your wallet. Then maybe every once in a while you can’t remember what you did with that $20 bill that you thought you left on the counter. Some of this might seem minor, but your girlfriend the thief is really just seeing how clueless you are, and how much she can get away with. If you don’t say anything about the change jar, then sooner or later it is going to be the $20 bill, and if you don’t say anything about the $20 bill then…well, I guess you are going to have to read on to find out.
11. Large Amounts of Money Are Missing
This is when things start to get really hairy. One night you two go out to a club and have a good time. The next morning your wallet is gone, although you are totally positive that you had it with you when you got home. Or maybe you recently checked your bank statement and there were a couple of ATM charges on there that you don’t remember making. This is a really bad spot to be in with your girlfriend. At this point you know that something is wrong without a shadow of a doubt. You don’t want to believe it is her, but nothing else adds up. If this kind of thing is happening, don’t delay what you need to do. No matter what she says, you are not crazy, she is. Call the cops if you want, but at the least kick her out and change the locks.
10. She Has a Problem with Alcohol or Drugs
A lot of the time this type of behavior does not come out of nowhere. Sure it is always possible that she is just a total bad seed and a sociopath, but it is often the case that someone that steals has an addiction problem that they can’t shake, and are stealing to feed their habit. They might even be ripping you off as some sort of cry for help. Not that this should make you feel bad obviously, I mean come on, the chick is stealing from you. But it is a sign you need to watch out. If you are hanging with someone who is totally out of control and a complete mess in the rest of their life, you should not be surprised if they are out of control and a complete mess when it comes to their life with you either.
9. She Cheats on You
Now I am not saying that if your girlfriend cheats on you she is also stealing from you. The two things are obviously different. One is about taking your cash, and the other is about well, sleeping with someone else. The two things obviously have totally different motives behind them. But one thing is for sure, if she is cheating on you then she does not have a lot of respect for you, and she thinks that you are a total chump. And if she does not have a lot of respect for you and she thinks that you are a total chump, she very well might be stealing from you as well. It is kind of a moot point though in reality, because if she is cheating on you she should be out the door anyway, before she gets a chance to steal from you. Come on dude, man up. Don’t be that guy.
8. She Has No Close Friends
This is a big one. Of course if she has no close friends it does not mean that she is stealing, but it almost certainly means something has to be wrong. There is a slight possibility that she is really shy, or that she is some sort of lone wolf that just likes her own company of course, anything is possible. But it is far more likely that she has had friends over her life, and all of those friendships have ended up falling apart. Why did this happen? Well it could be all sorts of things, but if you are missing money, then maybe, just possibly, she does not have any close friends because she has sticky fingers. It also could be a whole bunch of other reasons too, but all of them point towards some sort of character defect.
7. She Starts Acting Different
We all have been here at one point or another in our lives, and if you have not been here then you probably will some point soon. Things in your relationship are changing, your girlfriend is acting all odd, and you have no idea why. Well it could be a lot of reasons, but none of them are good. She could just be tired of you sitting around watching football and drinking beer all day, and she wants to break up. She could be cheating on you and is constantly thinking about the other person and worried that you are going to find out. Or she could be totally ripping you off and is worried that you are going to catch on and confront her about it. It could be all sorts of reasons she is acting different, but if you are missing money, odds are that is the reason.
6. She Has Had Lots of Breakups in the Past
Once again if the woman in your life has had a lot of breakups in the past, it does not mean that she is stealing from you. But if you think someone is stealing from you and your girlfriend has had a lot of breakups in the past it is probably her. You don’t have to be Columbo to figure something like this out. Obviously there has got to be some sort of reason why your lady has 20 ex boyfriends. While it is probable that her being crazy has something to do with it, her being a thief can not be taken off the table either. A lot of guys always think they are different, that sure this chick was totally nuts before she met you, but now that she has been with you for a while, she has totally changed. Yeah, I don’t think so.
5. You Almost Caught Her Once
There were a few times, or maybe just once that you actually almost caught her stealing from you. Like maybe there was that one time where you woke up and came out into the living room and saw her out there going through your wallet. Of course she was like “Oh hey baby, I was just going to go out and get milk for the coffee and was out of money, so I thought I would take a couple bucks and pay you back.” And it kind of made sense, so you just let it go. You even let it go when you realized that there was still plenty of milk in the fridge. But now that it is a few months later, and you keep noticing money is missing from your wallet, don’t let it go anymore. Come on, how stupid are you anyway? Don’t answer that.
4. She Always Has Money Problems
Alright, so once again I need to put in a little disclaimer here. People with money problems almost always are totally honest. I am not saying that people that don’t have money tend to be thieves. What I am saying is that if your girlfriend is totally broke, is not working, her credit cards are totally maxed out, and she is late on bills and all of a sudden you notice that your money keeps turning up missing then maybe these two issues connect. You have to be careful with this one though. Someone who is down and out and is bummed out about money totally doesn’t need to have insult added to injury and be accused of stealing. So get some proof before you bring it up, or you could wind up single fast. But at least maybe your next girlfriend won’t be poor.
3. Where She Goes, Things Come up Missing
Yeah so this is a huge red flag. You and your girl go over to a friend’s house for dinner, and then the next day your friend texts you and says she can’t find her phone; have you seen it? One weekend a while back you guys visit an old friend of yours for a couple days, and a month later your friend’s wife notices that she can’t find her grandmother’s ring. It is not like anyone is actually accusing you or your girlfriend of doing anything wrong, it is more like everywhere the two of you go, something turns up missing. Since you know you have not been stealing anything, who knows, maybe she is? Probably not, but if you are missing things from your own life, then sadly your girlfriend is probably the culprit.
2. She Hangs Out With Losers
This is a good one. Your girlfriend is hot, is smart, and is totally funny, but everyone she hangs out with is total trash. You and your friends like to have a good time, but keeps things under control, while all of her friends listen to Insane Clown Posse and you can find their photos really easily on mugshots.com. You know what I am getting at here. People do what they do and are into what they are into. But if it seems like your girl is leading some sort of double life, then she probably is. And maybe, just possibly that double life includes her going through your closets and selling your old Game Boy down at the pawnshop for 20 bucks. Hey, this might sound bad, but don’t say I didn’t warn you.
1. She Gaslights You
When you gaslight someone it basically means that you question their sanity, when in reality you know you are the one that did something wrong. A typical scenario would be something like this. You say “Hey baby, I keep noticing money is missing from my wallet, do you know anything about this?” And she replies “Oh so now I am stealing from you? I am so sick of you being so psycho and accusing me of things like this. You really need help!” See what she did there? All of a sudden you are the one that did something wrong and are crazy, just because you happened to mention the truth. This type can be particularly scary to deal with, because if she does this, you might not just be dealing with a thief, you might be dealing with a sociopath.
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