Girls can seem like a total mystery to a lot of guys out there. Why do they act the way they do? Why is it so hard to get them to like you? Why is it that something always seems to go wrong if you do end up being in a relationship? These are all important questions, but probably the most common one is "Why did she reject me?" Guys might think they are perfect for their crush, but end up being totally shot down as they approach the girl and try to start a relationship with them. Days later, they're still brooding in their room, losing sleep, and going insane trying to figure out why they were rejected so harshly.
In truth, guys might never totally understand what goes on inside women's minds. To many, they can seem like a totally different species– one that seems to operate as some sort of hive mind that will never allow you to become intimate with them. Although it can seem pretty tough for guys, especially those who are not outgoing or attractive, there is always a way into every woman's heart. It might not seem obvious at first, but work hard at it and you will probably be rewarded.
But sometimes there is absolutely no way in hell a woman will ever date you. That's just the honest truth. It's sad but true. There are some things about guys that are total turn-offs for certain girls, and many of these are things that guys can't even control. However, if you read these confessions of girls talking about why they rejected guys, you might get an idea of what you can change about yourself.
15 Being A Misogynist
In certain circles of guys, especially on the internet, there's this misconception going around that women are only interesting in so-called "alpha males." While it's true that most girls like masculinity, they can tell a "faker" a mile away. Don't try to be something you're not! If you're not that super masculine guy, don't bend over backwards trying to seem that way in front of the girl you like. They can see that you're just acting very easily. And in the end, most girls these days are very turned off by misogynists.
One girl confessed: "Thinking that acting rude, disrespectful, aggressive or arrogant is attractive. Nothing is more off-putting than a grown man desperately trying to pull off some hyper-masculine role clearly pretending to be something he is not, thinking that is a way to impress women. It doesn't make you irresistibly sexy, it makes you look like a ridiculous insecure misogynists."
14 Using Violence
On the same note, there is also a misconception that girls are turned on by primal displays of male dominance, such as violence towards other males. Wake up, guys. We aren't cavemen anymore. It takes a little more than punching another guy in the face to turn girls on these days. It also causes a lot of stress for girls and makes them feel unsafe around you. So don't feel like you have to be a knight in shining armor for girls. It's so outdated and it doesn't belong in 2017.
Don't believe me? Just listen to this girl: "Nothing makes me see red quicker than when a man thinks using (or just threatening) violence is somehow a turn-on to women. You don't need to defend my honor if another guy hits on me or even insults me, let me handle it or let's just walk away and that's it. Only if our lives or health are in danger and there is no way to escape, then it would be great if he can defend us but considering how common those kind of situations are it would be pretty safe to say nothing makes me run quicker than this."
13 When That “Nice Guy” Turns Bad…
A lot of girls are divided over whether they like the "nice guys." Some like the more sensitive, respectful types. Others are more turned on by guys with more bravado and those who grab life by the horns. Others still have learned the hard way that "nice guys" aren't always as "nice" as they seem. This girl posted an entire story about what happened to her when she rejected the nice guy. This whole story is basically a lesson in what not to do when you want to date a girl...
"He wouldn't just come out and say he liked me, even though we spent a lot of time together, had a lot in common and loved each other's company. Instead he just told our mutual friends that he liked me rather than telling me himself. Then I got a boyfriend, someone I knew from school, and 'nice guy' tried to kill himself, and that made me feel even more uncomfortable, which really sucked because we had been such good friends up until that point. He then became a drug dealer and turned into someone completely different, someone who randomly kicked a dog to death and threatened to break into my house if I didn't open my door to him at 2 am. He would leave me expensive gifts at my door despite me telling him I was no longer interested, then my fiancé (now husband) had to tell him to leave me alone and I haven't heard from him since."
12 Why She Doesn’t Date “Nice Guys”
When girls think about their ideal guy (or what they think their ideal guy is), they usually think of an actual nice guy. But some girls learn from experience that it's not always what they really want. Nice guys can turn out to be jerks too. And even if they're really nice guys, do girls really want that? Some girls confess that guys who are "too nice" are a turn off, because they seem like they would never stand up for themselves. They don't want someone who they can walk all over.
"I often went for the 'nice guy.' He usually turned out to be a complete jerk. I have recently began to refer to it as the facade. After those experiences I have become more reserved when it comes to who I let into my life. That aside, I may not date someone if they are too nice because they would be easily manipulated/swayed a.k.a. become a doormat. I cannot respect someone like that and therefore would not be able to have feelings strong enough to go forward with a relationship. It gets boring very quickly, not to mention suffocating. This is not to say I only go out with jerks... though my initial comment still stands."
11 Guys Who Need “Eye Candy”
This girl confessed why she rejects guys, and it's something all guys should hear. It's also pretty obvious, but hey, some guys just have no idea what they're doing. This girl confesses that the biggest turn off for her is when guys are constantly chasing girls. I guess she means those guys who think of themselves as "players." You know the type: the ones that are constantly trying to flirt with girls or check them out, or the type that follows hot girls on Instagram, and has his bedroom wall plastered with posters of half-naked chicks. Obviously this is a turn-off for a lot of girls...
When asked what her biggest turn-off was, she confessed: "Guys who constantly perv on other girls. Like, guys who flirt and check out other women all the time, follow hot-chick pages on social media, or have pictures of half naked women as wallpapers on their devices. Don't get me wrong– p*rn is one thing and I have no issue with guys having a spank bank, but I could never feel secure with a guy who needs to see 'eye candy' everywhere he looks. It's just off-putting, it's like hanging a Playboy calendar in your living room."
10 Bad Conversations
This is another big one that guys need to hear. That's right, if you can't carry a good conversation, then you're not going to have much luck with the ladies. Guys might get turned on primarily by what they see, but girls need a lot more than just visual stimulation to get interested. They want to feel a sense of mental connection, and the best way to do that is through conversation. This is where a lot of guys fail miserably. As this girl so hilariously points out, it's not like a video game where you can just keep repeating the same basic lines over and over until your score goes up. You actually have to think about it.
This girl confessed her biggest turn-off: "Terrible conversations. There are so many guys that try to talk to me where the conversations are them asking me questions like 'What's your favorite color?' or 'What's your favorite day?' Then, when they realize that those questions aren't working they'll just compliment my looks. Some of them just repeat this step like I'm some sort of Sim dating girl that will get more attraction points if you keep doing it. No. It doesn't work. If you want to have a conversation with me give me something more tangible like your own thoughts and opinions on current events or interests you might have."
9 They Smell Bad
This is another obvious reason girls have for rejecting guys, but amazingly, a lot of guys forget all about it. Smells are so important when it comes to dating. You may not be aware of it, but there are pheromones being exchanged when you are close to your crush, and many people believe these chemicals are the key to attraction and even love. These pheromones are inhaled through the nostrils, and it's all about the way people smell. Girls often have very sensitive noses. Even if you think you smell fine, the girl you're with might be able to pick up scents that you didn't even know you were giving off. So you better make sure you smell good if you're meeting up with your crush.
This girl admits that guys who smell bad have zero chance with her: "My ex smelled like broccoli. I knew the smell of him turned me off but it never clicked on what the smell was. Steamed broccoli. I have a really sensitive nose and some guys just have a very off-putting natural scent regardless of how frequently they shower. I feel terrible because it seems like such a little thing and it can't be helped, but it's just really something I can't handle."
8 Momma’s Boys
Most guys love their moms, and that's fine. But according to some girls, it can go a little too far. Guys who are so-called "momma's boys" are pretty big turn offs for a lot of girls out there, and the reasons are pretty obvious. It's obviously pretty sad when a grown man still depends on his mom to do everything for him. And at the end of the day, a relationship with this guy means that the girl is going to have to take up the mom's duties of taking care of him as if he's just a little boy. Girls don't want that! They value independence and want guys who can take care of themselves! And they sure as hell don't want to be the one who has to cook, clean, wash the clothes, etc. That's definitely not the dream life of any girl. This girl posted about guys she knew who depended on their mom to do things like clip their nails and cut their hair. It's safe to say she didn't want to date these guys in the slightest.
She admits: "If you're obviously a momma's boy, it's kind of a turn off. I mean, it's nice to care about your parents, but if you go to her for everything, then bye. I knew a guy with curly hair that only let his mom cut his hair. I knew another guy whose mom cuts his nails. Mind you, these were full grown men."
7 Ordering For Her
While some girls like it when a guy orders for them, the vast majority of girls see it as insulting. It's a really old cliche that a man ordering for his woman is somehow a turn on and a manly thing to do. And you definitely don't want to attempt this on the first date. Why? Because you don't know her yet, and you definitely don't know what kind of taste she has for food and drink. And even if you've known her for years, you probably still come off seeming like a jerk if you ordered her food for her. Because you never know, she might want to change things up and try something new.
One girl explains her biggest turn-off: "Someone who will try to order my food for me. Sorry but no. A lot of things that people refer to as 'chivalry' seem to just mean 'treating a woman like a small child.' I tend to discuss what I'm thinking about getting, or what I think sounds good, then when the waiter/waitress comes around he orders that for me. What if I was deciding between pasta and the chicken parmesan?! And he orders me the pasta but I wanted the chicken parmesan in the long run?"
6 They Don’t Drive
Although a lot of girls might not feel this way, I'm sure many would share the opinion that a guy who doesn't drive is a major turn off. This might not be the same in big cities, and it's probably not as big of a deal in Europe as it is in America, but it's still worth mentioning. And even if it seems kind of shallow to a lot of guys and girls out there, you can see why this would be a turn off. Having a car is a symbol of independence. It means you're a self-sufficient man who can deal with the expense of owning a car. It also makes going on dates easier and you don't have to rely on public transport to get places. Some might think this is kind of bratty thing to get turned off by, but a lot of girls agree.
When asked about her most shallow turn-off, a girl admitted: "I don't date girls/guys who don't drive. It creates such a pressure on the one who is mobile, and really creates a lopsided relationship. I can understand the "Hey my car is in the shop, or I'm saving a bit to get mine fixed/replaced" but the ones who have no interest in driving are an immediate write off for me. It's shallow because I don't drive."
5 His Lisp
Here's another hilarious story from a girl who got totally turned off by a guy on a first date. Why was she not attracted to him? His lisp. But that wasn't all; apparently he was very effeminate and flamboyant in his body language. The combination of this and his lisp meant that she was not going to give this guy a second date. This is another turn off that seems kind of shallow, but hey, it's better to get the brutal honest truth. It's also something this guy can't even control (at least without a speech coach), so it hurts even more.
The girl talked about her disastrous first date: "We went to mini golf and he had a mild freak out because he spotted a (single, sedentary) bee and told me he was allergic. Not only was he allergic he was desperately, horribly, deathly allergic. The combo of 'I can't get thtung or I'll thwell up and need to go to the hothpital' with his spread out effeminate fingers in an 'I can't even' kind of pose... I just couldn't envision myself being s*xually attracted to him. He had disclosed that many people thought he was gay because of the lisp. I don't think he got that it was his flamboyant body language that have a much stronger hint of gay. I like soft men. That, my friend, was too damn soft."
4 Pressuring Girls
Take note, because this is another very important reason why girl reject guys. In this situation, the girl isn't talking about saying yes to a date, she's talking about saying yes to hooking up. She hates it when guys are too pushy. If she says no once, then you need to stop. No matter how much you keep nagging and pestering her, she's not going to change her mind. This girl puts it all into perspective when she compares it to high school days when kids used to try and peer pressure each other into doing things. It just doesn't work. Not only that, but being too pushy will likely mean she'll dump you for a man who will respect her more and know when the time is right.
This girl revealed her biggest reason for rejecting guys, saying: "Being too pushy. If I say no, that means no. That doesn't mean you should be like, 'aww come on!' and give me a hard time about it. I've had guys do this with anything from casual dates to s*x acts. This isn't high school... I'm not going to give into peer pressure. If you want a girl to jump your bones try making her feel comfortable and respected instead."
3 Guys Who Brag About Their Size
Guys have some pretty strange ideas when it comes to what they think women want to hear. Life isn't a p*rno, guys! Talking about how big you are down there isn't going to get women swooning and desperate to hop into bed with you. It's just not how it works. This type of behavior is juvenile and it will probably end with the girl laughing right in your face. Or, if you're unlucky, you could get a slap in the face. We'll let you decide which one hurts more. At the end of the day, girls want to hear about something a little more meaningful than the size of your s*x organ. Just a tip.
A girl confessed the reason she had to brutally reject a guy: "Once had a guy not drop, but outright show me his single condom from the bottom of his bag. I laughed and made a couple jokes, (LOL! For your Massive DongTM) me being me, and because I honestly didn't think he was being serious. Okay, then he kept talking about it and showed every girl passing by, I tried to focus on the work I was doing, but he wouldn't stop. Then he asked me invasive questions about whether or not I was a virgin. I just laughed and kept working, and outright ignored him. He didn't stop. Took my silence as a yes. Then acted shocked."
2 Being Bad Between The Sheets
This might not be something that a guy wants to hear, but it's true. A lot of girls reject and dump guys simply because they're not cutting it in the sack. Guys have a lot of trouble accepting it, because this is pretty much the ultimate blow to their ego. For a lot of guys, it's something that they can't really control, either. But before you accuse women of being shallow monsters, think about it for a second. S*x is a huge part of any functioning relationship, and without it, it kind of loses its meaning. S*x isn't everything, but it is important, and you can't fault women for trying to find someone who can actually satisfy them in bed.
What makes this woman reject a guy? Simple: "When guys are bad at s*x. I've had guys who don't use their hips for thrusting, but rather their whole bodies. One guy had a small member, which would not have been a problem if he was able to make up for it in other ways, s*xually. One guy sweated so much during s*x that it dripped into my eye and my mouth [...] I was not a fan of having to wash my sheets after EVERY time."
1 He Showed Her Messages From Other Girls
This girl talks about one time she rejected a guy, and the reason will blow your mind. Is this even true? If so, this guy had to be trolling. There's just no way he seriously thought it was a good idea to show a girl pictures of other girls half-naked. And this is a girl he supposedly had a crush on? What was going through his mind? I guess he might've thought that by showing her those naughty pictures, he made her think that there were tons of girls who wanted him? Maybe in his warped mind, he thought this would make her jealous or something? I can't even find words to describe how stupid of a decision this was...
This girl talks about why she decided to reject a guy: "I was recently hanging out with a guy (literally just hanging out, no making out or flirting) so I could get a sense of him. He seemed lovely and fun and cool. Next minute, he is showing me sexy pics that other girls had sent him. Pretty sure these girls would have been mortified if they knew that he was flashing their semi nudes to me!"