Don't go in the basement! Scream it all you want, but these tantalizing women make the wrong choice every time. Of course, that's part of their charm. Who can stomach some of the bland, seen-it-before horror movies being made today without a bombshell annoying all the guys who will soon be so much gore on the walls? We need a damsel in distress in order to suspend our disbelief concerning the conveniently mutated mush-monster, which has been stalking our local high school since that bomb went off on the football field. (And she better be delicious.) We prefer the girl-next-door type who looks so good in jeans and a t-shirt that we can't wait to Google her the moment the flick ends.
Many young actresses who later became box-office draws started in horror flicks. We're not too concerned with them, though. We're going for young ladies in recent movies whose acting is about as skillful as Steve Harvey is accurate. If they're the main character, so be it. We're just as impressed, though, with that eye candy standing in the corner with the confused look on her face and the tattered tank top on her back. So, here's to 15 of the most moisture-making mavens in modern horror movies:
15 Ashley Hinshaw - The Pyramid, 2014
14 Natalie Dormer - The Forest, 2016
13 Cassidy Gifford - The Gallows, 2015
12 Nina Dobrev - The Final Girls, 2015
11 Missy Peregrym - Backcountry, 2014
10 Jaclyn Swedberg - Muck, 2015
9 Lil Baross - Hansel v. Gretel, 2015
8 Gage Golightly - Cabin Fever, 2016
7 Ali Cobrin - Girl House, 2015
6 Chloe Bridges - Nightlight, 2015
5 Lydia Hearst - Condemned, 2015
4 Ali Costello - Private Number, 2014
3 Sarah Dumont - Scouts Guide to the Zombie Apocalypse, 2015
2 Kacey Barnfield - World War Dead: Rise of the Fallen, 2015
1 Brooke Butler - The Sand, 2015
Here we have it. The perfect combination of silly story, laughable special effects, a large man stuck in a trash can, and gorgeous women clad in bikinis the entire time. And leading the pack is a lovely lady named Brooke Butler who likely auditioned for this role after reading about it in a bathroom stall. She's an incredible example of American good looks. Thin but not skinny, no tats or obnoxious piercings. Just all blonde. We would go into some detail about the plot but you really have to see it to believe it. The budget for this thing must have been whatever the director had in his wallet at the moment he pitched it. Thankfully, the vixens save the day, making The Sand an acceptable substitute for a truly scary movie. Enjoy.
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