Donald Trump has made a ton of headlines in his many years in the public eye. From going bankrupt to the heights of The Apprentice, from getting into a WWE ring to his recent run for President, The Donald has made many friends and even more enemies with his distinctive, bombastic style. His ability to call attention to himself has invited ridicule for many reasons, but one of the main reasons people love to laugh at the New York-based real-estate mogul is his hair. Speculation has long reigned over the provenance of Trump’s hair. Is it a wig? Is it a dead animal of some kind? Is it some incredibly long comb-over that happens to trail behind him when Trump ends up in a windy spot? It’s one of the great mysteries of the universe.
It’s no surprise, then, that one of the first questions Trump was asked when he first entered the presidential race in June was about his hair. The 69-year-old invited a woman on stage and asked her to touch his hair after she asked if it was real. Politico reports that Trump told supporters that his hair was 100% natural. “Maybe people don’t like my style. Maybe they don’t like my hair, which is real, by the way.”
No, Donald, people don’t really like your hair. But here are 10 other celebrity hairstyles that have managed to trump the Donald’s sandy-brown coif in terms of sheer awfulness.
10. Lil’ Kim
This female rapper garnered almost as much attention for her outrageous fashion sense as she has for her music or lyrics over the years. Her body-baring outfits were often the talk of the Grammy Awards, pushing actual award winners and major stars into obscurity by daring to show as much skin as humanly possible. Lil’ Kim, who is one of the top female rappers in the industry and can spit rhyme with the best of them, will sadly be remembered for her candy-coloured wigs and hair dye jobs. She has tightened things up in recent years, but Lil’ Kim’s hair was often quite ridiculous. And that is worth remembering.
9. Carrot Top
This famous prop comedian (are there any other famous prop comedians) was once the punch line in many of his own jokes. In fact, his scrawny body and his orange bouffant curls were the perfect offset to his manic silliness, which brought him attention all across North America. But by 2007, the skinny comedian went back to the weight room. It was when he stopped living life on the road and settled down in Las Vegas with his Carrot Top Live at the Luxor show, now in its eighth consecutive year. Steroid and plastic surgery rumors have dogged the comedian, but it’s not his body we’re here to talk about, it’s his hair. Carrot Top insists that his trademark ‘do is the product of daily blow-drying and a drawer full of hair products and that he is constantly looking after his trademark curls. Maybe he and Donald Trump need to compare notes when the Donald’s campaign brings him through Las Vegas.
8. Miley Cyrus
Miley Cyrus came onto the pop culture scene as the ‘Best of Both Worlds,’ as her Hannah Montana theme song boasted, but this teen princess decided to take things in another direction when she started her post-Disney music career. She came in like a wrecking ball in 2013 with a dramatic new look and outlook on life, embracing her sexuality and her new-found freedom. For a period of about six months in 2013, you couldn’t see a photo of Billy Ray Cyrus’ little girl without her sticking her tongue out of her mouth as far as humanly possible – and it was impressively far. It was when she cut off her sandy brown hair and dyed it blonde that she landed on our list. Since then, she has dialed back the controversy a little bit, but she will forever be remembered for her tongue-flashing days. Fondly, or not.
7. Jennifer Lopez
Granted, J-Lo has long been considered a fashion and style icon by the majority of the pop-culture consuming public, but Jenny from the Block has had some impressive style missteps over the years, chief among them her hideous bouffant hairstyle from the 2002 Academy Awards. Sporting a beautiful Versace gown, Lopez topped off her outfit with a bouffant about three seats wide, likely obscuring the view of anyone who happened to be sitting behind her that night. At other times, Lopez’s bold style choices have proven successful, but on this one night in 2002, J-Lo’s ‘do looked more like a don’t.
6. Nicki Minaj
What is it with female rappers and bizarre, candy-coloured hairdos? The Starships singer has sported her share of bizarre neon wigs and styles over the last few years, but this look took the awfulness cake, and then smashed the cake into a million pieces. The platinum blonde centre, complimented by hot-pink poodle poofs on either side when she arrived at the 2011 iHeartRadio Music Festival. Over the years, Minaj, who called out Iggy Azalea last year for not writing her own rhymes, has toned down her look, preferring to let her music speak for itself and allowing her natural hair colour to take centre stage on multiple occasions – to her benefit!
5. Jared Leto
Sure, his turn as the Joker in the recently-released Suicide Squad trailer set the Internet on fire, but the reality is that it has taken Jared Leto a long time to get past his emo-goth-eyeliner days in 2006 and 2007. The actor, who rocketed to stardom as the object of Claire Danes’ affections in the teen soap My So-Called Life, has experimented with many different haircuts over the years, but this one was the worst. Making fun of young people who grow up in the public eye for their experimental style choices over the years seems slightly cruel, but hey, that’s the Internet.
4. Kelly Osbourne
Kelly Osbourne first came into the public eye when cameras invaded her family’s home in the first wave of reality-TV programming back in 2002. Since then, Osbourne has battled drug and alcohol issues as well as dealing with serious illnesses in her family. What she shouldn’t be commended for is her choice of haircuts. Osbourne has experimented with different unnatural colours, bizarre two-tone dye jobs and some hacked-up disasters. Can you blame her? This young woman was brought up in a house with a dad who bit the heads off live bats in concert. She didn’t have a chance.
3. Hulk Hogan
If you grew up in the ‘80s, you remember the iconic wrestling superstar Hulk Hogan, whose long blonde locks belied the male-pattern baldness starting to form in the middle of his head. Hogan has no doubt noticed it as well, as he has taken to sporting a bandana covering the bald spot, with what’s left of his bleached-blonde locks hanging down from the side of his head. Hogan, whose romp between the sheets with a friend’s ex-wife was caught on videotape and released to the public in 2012, just won’t give in to the ravages of age and shave his head. In for a penny, in for a pound, we suppose. Hogan’s bizarre pride just won’t let him embrace his true age and despite being 62 years old, he still dresses like a 21-year-old snowboarder. Grow up, Hulk.
2. Helena Bonham Carter and Tim Burton
This long-term pair have long been known for their rat’s-nest hairdos, but the reality is that these two may not have ever seen a hairbrush in their entire lives. Case in point: the 2013 Academy Awards. The couple look like they rolled out of bed, threw on some formal wear, and went to the show. Burton, whose film oeuvre includes The Nightmare Before Christmas, Mars Attacks!, Edward Scissorhands and the 1989 Batman, has a rep for being an eccentric auteur, but really, it’s not like either he or Bonham Carter really appear to care all that much here, almost as though they got out of bed with just enough time to get dressed and nothing else.
1. Justin Timberlake
He has indeed brought sexy back, but Justin Timberlake’s path to style-icon status was a rocky one indeed. The Suit and Tie singer burst onto the scene as a member of the boy band ‘NSync in the late ‘90s and early 2000s, sporting a bizarre-looking crown of dyed-blond curls on top of his head like some sort of bizarre Alexander the Great. Not long after that, Timberlake opted for tight braids that made him a laughingstock. In fact, it’s a miracle he achieved sex-symbol status at all, given the bizarre hairstyles he sported in those first few years in the public eye, but yet, he has.
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