Life hacks. They’re designed to make life easier, a fancy term to better disseminate knowledge that might otherwise remain unknown throughout large swaths of society. For example, you could pinch the opposite end of a banana to make it peel easier, or use hand sanitizer to remove ink from your t-shirt.
Most life hacks are small, simple things that can help with everyday tasks. But some life hacks are, shall we say, a little Machiavellian in nature.
While most life hacks will just help you do something like unclogging a drain, these life hacks will help you maneuver around the many pitfalls of living in the developed world. Some of these life hacks could be considered unethical, while others might consider them to be flat out genius.
Those that consider the latter are probably psychopaths, but we won’t hold it against them since anyone can set aside their conscience for a moment to take advantage of these ingenious solutions to some of life’s more difficult to solve problems.
Let’s take a look at some of the more devious life hacks out there.
10. Baby On Board
We start off with a hefty dose of dark reality. Rescue responders may not officially have a rule where the car with the children on board have to be looked after before all else, but the reality is most people place a higher premium on babies and children than fully grown adults. We can’t imagine why, after all, a life is a life, but with this life hack you can take advantage of that fact to hopefully save your own.
9. Save A Flat Tire, Bail On A Family Event
This one truly is incredibly clever. Never have to attend a boring family event or wedding again with this handy life hack. However, be careful: if you take your flat-tire photo on a sunny day and try to use it when it’s raining, things might go sideways for you.
8. Craigslist Hacking For Fun And Profit
This has actually happened to us more than once. We always thought those first few ridiculously low offers were from some guys just looking for free stuff, but turns out we were being swindled. Who knew?
7. Profiteering From Death
This actually works for more than just cars. Want to get a house on the cheap? Maybe some cheap furniture? The possibilities are endless.
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6. Hack Electronics, But In A Fun Way
5. Taking Advantage Of The Misplaced Values In Work Culture
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3. Liar, Liar
This one is so hard to remember, but absolutely crucial when it comes time to get away with murder. Or, uh, something less felonious.
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2. How To Get Performance In Bed
You could also take a Cialis beforehand to make this life hack last for hours. Just make sure your partner doesn’t pass out halfway through.
1. How To Hang Up On Your Friends
Yeah, I’d love to chat, but my phone is about to dy-
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