There are only a few of us that use Instagram because we enjoy it. Most of us use it to spy on people that we know and to make fun of how totally lame they are. If you are not one of those people that use Instagram for that reason, then you’re one of the people being made fun of. Sure my tribe and I put up our own stuff on Instagram but only to fool you into thinking that we’re one of you. Rest assured, we’re not.
While there are a whole lot of people who post on Instagram and deserve to be mocked, there are some groups of people that are just so awful, just so totally and completely ridiculous, that they need to be called out, even more so than just the average user. These people will see this list, and most of them will not even recognize themselves. They’ll think that I’m talking about someone else and continue posting the same old junk that everyone hates. Not only that, but they’re also the type that’s most likely to actually like their own post, which is pretty much proof positive you are dealing with a total Instagram loser.
So read on and see if you know anyone like this in your online life. If you do, it’s very likely that you can’t stand them and mock them daily. So why do you keep looking at their feed? It’s like a car crash. You can’t look away.
Here are the 15 most irritating types of people on Instagram.
15. The Hot Yoga Chick
While all of the different types of people on this list are totally irritating, the hot yoga chick has to be at or near the top of this or any other list of this type. The whole thing is so transparent really. It always is being sold as some chick getting in touch with her spiritual side, and how much yoga has really helped her emotionally and how it has helped her achieve her goals. But you and I know that, in reality, all she wants to do is have everyone look at her hot body and how flexible she is. I mean, come on… if she were really spiritually enlightened, would she be setting up a camera to take photos of her looking super hot while she did yoga? You and I both know the answer to that one, which is why the yoga chick makes this list.
14. The Partier
Next on the list of people that we hate the most on Instagram are the people that are totally desperate to show all of us just how much fun they’re having all of the time. Yeah, we get it: you’re at a party or a club, and you’re getting totally drunk. Yay! Back in my day, if I was at a party and someone tried to take a photo of me, it would be something to be angry about, not something to celebrate. Why would you want everyone in the world to see you getting all messed up at a party? I can tell you why: because you’re totally insecure, and you want everyone to think that you’re cool. The thing is, though, it didn’t work. Now, people just think you’re a drunk desperate for attention.
13. The Fitness Nut
Now here’s where it gets a little bit complicated. Do I like looking at hot chicks with really nice bodies and are hardly wearing any clothes? Of course, I do. There’s very little that’s more enjoyable than doing that. Even when I’m looking at these hot chicks, do they still seem like idiots? Of course, they do. That’s the common thread here with all of these different people that are irritating on Instagram. They’re all dying for you to check them out on Instagram, so that immediately makes them kind of irritating. The hot chick at the gym working out next to you that doesn’t want you to check her out? That’s hot. The hot chick posting pictures on Instagram begging for you to follow her? Not hot at all.
12. The Creeper
It wouldn’t be Instagram or any kind of social media, really, if it wasn’t for the creeper. The creeper is an interesting type in a way because there are all sorts of guys that can get away with flirting and acting funny to women on Instagram, but the Creeper just can’t. It isn’t even really because of his looks. It’s more because of his total lack of game. The guy just trolls around and tries to flirt with women all the time but instead just winds up creeping them out constantly. The creeper does have one somewhat redeeming feature, and that’s that he totally irritates just about all of the other people on this list who are irritating, so he has that going for him. Sadly, that’s the only thing that he has going for him, however.
11. The Celebrity
This one is more irritating than most, and that really is saying something. There are all sorts of women and men, but mostly women, who are celebrities on Instagram. But just on Instagram, of course. In the real world, no one cares at all. Some of them might have 10 or 20 thousand followers, which they remind you of on a daily basis, and a lot of them have actually started to think that they’re famous. Well, they are, in a way, but it isn’t like anyone cares about them. Quite the opposite, really. People usually like and follow these types just because they want to see in what way they debase themselves for a small bit of validation on the Internet. These women are pretty much like every contestant on The Bachelor ever. In other words, totally lame.
10. The Constant Selfie Chick
I understand that a certain type of person is going to take a certain amount of selfies and post them on Instagram. I mean, all of their friends are doing it, right? So why not? But there’s a certain line that people cross when their feed is just full of a bunch of selfies, and honestly, it’s not a good look. Here’s a pro tip: you look the same. It isn’t that you look totally different every time you put up a new selfie. You have the same face, and honestly, it just isn’t really that interesting. Maybe just put up a selfie every once in a great while like a normal person would instead of putting one up like every five minutes. No one cares about your selfies, and no, you don’t look cool. Not even a little bit. Truth hurts sometimes.
9. The Hashtag Guy
Like seriously, knock off all of the hashtags. It’s like one of those jokes that you tell in front of some dumb kid at a picnic, and the kid laughs at it and thinks it’s the funniest joke he’s ever heard. And then, the rest of the day, that kid comes back around to you while you’re just trying to chill out and eat your hot dog, and he keeps repeating the same joke back to you over and over, and each time, he laughs even harder at it. Sooner or later, you want to freak out and start yelling at the kid because it’s like, seriously? You still think that’s funny? And that’s what it’s like when you use too many hashtags. It’s like you’re a dumb kid at a picnic. Don’t be like that. Don’t use too many hashtags.
8. The ‘Look What I Ate’ Guy
This is one of the absolute worst. Honestly, who would do this? Who would possibly care what you had to eat? I was sitting at a bar the other day, and this guy came in and ordered some food, alone at the bar. His food comes, and he took a picture of it. I’m telling you, out of all of the signs in the world that the end times are near, people taking photos of their food and putting in up on social media might be the biggest. I’d like all of my friends to pay attention to what I’m saying right now, and that’s if I ever, even once, do something like this, please feel free to punch me in the face as hard as you can. I don’t want to be that guy; I really don’t. These types are some of the worst on Instagram.
7. The Traveler
Yeah, we get it. You’re on vacation. You know how we know? Because you won’t stop posting all sorts of photos about it. This is one of the more confusing ones of the bunch because it’s quite possible that we do want to be where you are, it sure looks like fun, and we always wanted to go there. But what we don’t want is to look like you while we’re doing it. I mean, think about it: there you are someplace totally amazing that many of us have dreamed of going, but are you enjoying it? No, not even a little bit, actually. What you’re doing is taking photos of yourself or trying to get someone else to take a photo of you so you can show everyone what an amazing time you’re having and how special you are. My point is, you’re trying way too hard. And it shows.
6. The Cute Couple
Aww, you guys are totally in love. We all can tell. It’s so obvious to all of us. And do you know how we can tell? Well, it’s mostly because all you do is post photos of you and your boyfriend on Instagram. There are a couple of things that are wrong here. First of all, and I’ve touched on this before, but it’s obvious that you’re trying way too hard to show how happy you guys are if you keep putting up photos of yourselves. That’s one thing. The second thing is, what kind of guy would allow this? It’s cool to do the occasional couple shot on Instagram, but if you’re a guy, and there’s more than one photo like that up every couple of days, then you’re totally whipped — there are no two ways around it.
5. The Car Selfie Lover
We already touched on one aspect of the constant Instagram selfie person earlier on in this article, but the car selfie person is another type altogether. So basically, you’re sitting in a car, and you have some time to kill. Maybe it’s ten minutes, maybe it’s ten seconds. If at any point during this time you decide it might be a good idea to start taking photos of yourself and putting them up on Instagram for people to see, you’re lame. I’m honestly not joking here. You’re totally lame. This doesn’t mean you can’t stop being lame. All it would take would be to… well… stop taking selfies of yourself in cars. Seriously, we get that you’re shallow; we really do. But maybe, just don’t make it so obvious for once?
4. The Philosopher
People go to Instagram for many things. Some of those things may be good, and some of those things may be bad, but there’s one thing people don’t go to Instagram for, and that’s to listen to you spout off about how deep you are. We get it; all of us really do. You’re a very special person, and you have a lot of very interesting things to say. I mean, you must, right? Why else would you be spouting off constantly on Instagram and letting us all know about how you’ve been meditating all the time while you’re walking barefoot and how much doing so has given you a much better understanding of Earth and all its creatures? Honestly, I think I would rather see a car selfie than seeing something like what these types throw out there.
3. The Dieter
So, I’m sure you’ve figured out a common thread by now, and that’s pretty much every single person on this list is the type of Instagram poster that wants a whole lot of attention. That always stays the same; it’s just the reasons that vary. The Instagram dieter is no different. Say, she wants to do the Whole30, or say, she’s just cutting down on carbs, or maybe she’s going to go gluten free or stay off sugar. It doesn’t really matter, really. What matters the most is that she wants you to know about every little thing that she’s doing along the way, and she’s going to take like a thousand different photos of her body, what she’s wearing, and what she’s eating. No one cares, of course, but don’t tell her that. If you do, she’ll eat a large pizza and cry.
2. The Inspirational Quote Type
Yeah, so this pretty much goes without saying, but the thing is, I’m going to say it anyway. The people that hang out on Instagram posting inspirational quotes are just completely awful. The only thing that would be inspirational about the quotes that you people put up is if you totally stopped doing them. I mean, that would be inspirational if you just stopped putting up quotes entirely or, better yet, just stopped posting on Instagram altogether. That’s the thing about this type, in particular: at least the other types are people that we can all make fun of; this person doesn’t even really exist. It’s just some clown putting up some photo that’s supposed to make us think. And we do think something: we think the person that posted it is an idiot.
1. The Stage Mom
Honestly, if you’re a mom and you’re posting on Instagram, none of us care at all about you and your baby. Now, I’m not talking about those of you that are posting for family and friends. I’m talking about you moms out there who are posting to show everyone how cute your kid is and how totally hot you are even though you had a kid recently. And that’s the thing: we can tell the difference. All of us can tell when you’re posting just to show your family a cool photo of you and your baby and when you’re desperately trying to show everyone else in the world how happy you are as a mom. None of us are buying it, and that’s why these types are among the most irritating people on Instagram.