It’s a challenge for me to think of any movie that doesn’t have at least one kiss between two characters. Even Lady and the Tramp, a children’s movie, has that iconic moment when the two dogs lock lips after sharing a plate of spaghetti. Sure, it wasn’t full-on making out – and it may border on bestiality – but it was a kiss nonetheless. At this point, a good kissing scene is a Hollywood institution; we see one (or an attempt at one) in practically every movie ever made, just as we do an exploding building or Nicolas Cage.
If film making is an art, a movie kiss is the art within the art. In fact, kissing, in general, should be looked upon as an art form in itself. For many of us, it takes years to master, and even after we have shared hundreds of kisses with dozens of people, we remain insecure about our ability to make out. Given that movie stars tend to exude the kind of confidence you’d expect from a particularly arrogant Arabian prince, it’s generally assumed that each one of them is as gifted in the art of kissing as they are in the art of acting (some of them even exhibit a great deal more skill in the latter than they do in the former). However, not all of Hollywood’s sons and daughters are the great kissers their studios would have you believe.
Here, to make you feel better about your own kissing technique, are Hollywood’s 15 worst kissers, as revealed by their co-stars.
15. Bradley Cooper According To Jennifer Lawrence
Bradley Cooper is one of those guys who seems to be annoyingly good at everything. No matter what role he takes, he manages to turn it into gold, even something as admittedly poorly written as any of the three installments of The Hangover. To make it all the more frustrating, Cooper is among the most handsome men in Hollywood and could conceivably steal the girlfriend of any average joe.
However, all of us regular schmucks can rejoice in the fact that Cooper, according to his former co-star Jennifer Lawrence, is not a particularly skilled kisser. According to Lawrence, who shared a kiss with Cooper in the 2012 drama Silver Linings Playbook, the four-time Academy Award nominee is a sloppy kisser and was unable to complete their scene without leaving saliva around the edges of her mouth.
14. Angelina Jolie According To James McAvoy
I don’t think there is any actress alive today more dripping with sexual energy than Angelina Jolie. Jolie has appeared in numerous vivid sex scenes throughout her career and her real-life fascination with BDSM and same-sex flings is well-documented, serving only to further cement her status as Hollywood’s single greatest sex symbol.
Despite all the hype, however, it seems that Jolie Is a relatively unimpressive kisser. James McAvoy was granted the opportunity to lock lips with Jolie when he starred alongside her in the 2008 film Wanted and was not particularly thrilled with his experience. Speaking after the fact, McAvoy told the media that his kiss with Angelina Jolie was “awkward, sweaty, and not very nice”. There’s still a large part of me that would love to spend a couple of minutes making out with Angelina Jolie, just not in front of a film crew.
13. Shailene Woodley According To Miles Teller
Shailene Woodley has appeared in some of the most memorable movies of the past decade. Moviegoers may recognize her from her roles in Divergent, Snowden, and even The Fault in Our Stars. Woodley’s acting talents have earned her a variety of awards and nominations, including one for the Golden Globe for Best Supporting Actress. But despite her success, Woodley continues to be a horrible on-screen kisser.
Speaking about his kissing scene with Woodley on The Spectacular Now, a slightly traumatized Miles Teller said: ”Before our first kissing scene, Shailene took these Chinese diet supplements and shoved them in her mouth.” According to Teller, these supplements made Woodley’s breath “smell like crap”, so we can only imagine how her mouth must have tasted during their kiss.
12. Emma Watson According To Daniel Radcliffe
Emma Watson is a unique case. The Harry Potter actress has risen through the ranks to become something of a sex symbol, yet she has managed to do so without ever having embarked on a particularly raunchy scene. It is rare for an actress as beautiful as Watson to not be objectified by at least a portion of the moviegoing public, but her impeccable acting talents are practically impossible to overlook. Her kissing talents, however, seem to be somewhat lacking.
When speaking about the kiss he shared with Watson in Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, franchise star Daniel Radcliffe likened the experience to making out with an animal, due to Watson’s aggressiveness and ferocity. Rupert Grint, who also shared an on-screen kiss with Watson, later described the experience as being only “okay”.
11. Harrison Ford According To Helen Mirren
Having starred in classic films such as Star Wars and Indiana Jones, Harrison Ford is Hollywood’s quintessential movie bad ass. In the real world, Ford has had affairs with supermodels, piloted aircraft, and had a species of spider named after him. Even today when pushing 80 years of age, it seems like there is nothing Harrison Ford can’t do. That is, of course, except for kissing.
According to Ford’s Mosquito Coast co-star Helen Mirren, the Hollywood legend isn’t the greatest when it comes to making out in front of the camera. In fact, Mirren has gone so far as to question Ford’s kissing ability in real life, saying “He’s probably not very good off-screen either.” The apparent Dame would go on to further humiliate Ford by saying “It’s not just me, other actresses agree.”
10. Kate Hudson According To Dane Cook
We generally don’t imagine celebrities having bad breath. Or, at least, we don’t imagine borderline legendary, incredibly beautiful actresses having bad breath. I suppose, deep down, we all know it must happen, but we choose not to think about it because we don’t want to ruin our fantasies about certain stars and their perceived utter perfection.
Comedian Dane Cook, however, has had no problem going on record and calling out Hollywood notables on their poor hygiene and bad breath. When speaking about a kiss he shared with Kate Hudson in the comedy My Best Friend’s Girl, Cook proclaimed that Hudson’s breath stank during filming, saying “I think she ate, like, a feast of onions before our scene.” To this day, Cook still lists Hudson as the worst on-screen kiss of his career.
9. Jason Segel According To Alyson Hannigan
I have trouble referring to Jason Segel by his real name. I watched so many episodes of How I Met Your Mother when I was in high school that I don’t think I’m ever going to be able to see him as anything other than Marshall Eriksen. For that reason, I’m sure you can imagine how difficult it was for me to hear that Alyson Hannigan, who played Lily Aldrin, the wife and one true love of Eriksen, did not enjoy any of the kissing scenes she shared with her former co-star.
According to Hannigan, Segel, while nothing less than a gentleman and a consummate professional, had a terrible smoking habit and would put away several packs in a day. This, of course, meant that he would have stunk of cigarette smoke every time Hannigan had to kiss him. Or at least he would have if he didn’t admit in an interview that he quit smoking the day they started filming.
8. Jennifer Lawrence According To Liam Hemsworth (And Josh Hutcherson)
There’s something about Jennifer Lawrence that is absolutely irresistible. I can’t say for certain what it is, but I suspect it has something to do with her combination of raw talent, jaw-dropping beauty, and ability to remain humble in the face of wild success. However, the public may find Lawrence very much resistible upon reading about her various Hunger Games kissing scenes.
According to both of her Hunger Games co-stars, making out with Lawrence was not a particularly pleasant experience. Liam Hemsworth has gone on record as saying Lawrence’s breath smelled of tuna during their kiss, while Josh Hutcherson has described his kiss with the Academy Award winning actress as being “very slobbery”. According to the unsatisfied Hutcherson, “There was fluid here, fluid here, and fluid here”, which doesn’t sound all that appealing.
7. Rupert Grint According To Emma Watson
You’ve got to feel bad for Rupert Grint. Over the years, his Harry Potter co-stars Daniel Radcliffe and Emma Watson transformed into certified screen legends with astounding good looks, while he remained little more than the chubby red-headed kid audiences had been introduced to back in 2001. To make matters worse for poor old Rupert, his kissing game is apparently somewhat lacking, at least if you believe what Emma Watson has to say.
According to Watson, who, of course, played Hermione Granger in the Harry Potter film series, Grint is simply too reserved and too awkward to be a quality kisser. Speaking about her various on-screen romances, Watson declared her kiss with Grint to be “the weirdest” before adding insult to injury by proclaiming “Dan wasn’t so bad”.
6. James Franco According To Vanessa Hudgens
Hollywood pretty boy James Franco has been the envy of men everywhere for years now. Not only does the guy have those traditional movie star good looks, he also boasts the acting talent to play virtually any role he wants to. Franco’s filmography consists of a steady stream of serious and light-hearted roles and includes the 2010 film 127 Hours, which earned him an Oscar nomination for Best Actor.
For all his success, however, Franco can’t change the fact that he is apparently pretty untalented when it comes to making out. When discussing her kissing scene with Franco in Spring Breakers, Vanessa Hudgens stated that getting through the kiss was a challenge as she had absolutely no desire to make out with him. Hudgens went so far as to say that she would rather have kissed a girl than to have shared that scene with James Franco.
5. Matt Lanter According To AnnaLynne McCord
Matt Lanter has appeared in such cinematic classics as Disaster Movie and Vampires Suck – I’m being sarcastic, of course – but achieved his greatest fame playing the role of Liam Court in the teen drama 90210. During his time on the show, Lanter became an obsession for teenage girls all around the world and soon found himself unable to walk down the street without being attacked by a mob of pubescent fans.
While I’m sure any regular 90210 viewer would have killed for a chance to lock lips with Matt Lanter, the actresses who did were not all that impressed by his technique. AnnaLynne McCord, who shared countless kisses with Lanter during the filming of 90210 has described her former co-star as “a really bad kisser”. Not one to pull punches, McCord went on to admit that making out with Lanter “kind of sucks”.
4. Steve Carell According To Dwayne Johnson
Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson is one of the highest paid actors in the world today and is among the most powerful men in Hollywood, so if you’re going to kiss him, you had better bring your A game. Steve Carell, it seems, did not.
Carell and Johnson embarked on a same-sex makeout session in their 2008 feature film Get Smart. Later on, when discussing their ever so romantic scene together, The Rock compared kissing Steve Carell to kissing a cat, which I don’t think was supposed to be a compliment. The multi-time WWE Champion would go on to announce that Carell’s tongue has the same texture as kitty litter, though he didn’t specify if the kitty litter in question had been soiled or not.
3. Leonardo DiCaprio According To Virginie Ledoyen
I don’t know why, but women the world over have an insatiable obsession with Leonardo DiCaprio. I suppose it must have something to do with his millions of dollars, countless awards, and heart-stopping good looks. Yes, it seems like every straight female on this planet would sacrifice all of their possessions just to spend a night with the actor. Every woman except for Virginie Ledoyen.
Virginie Ledoyen, for those of you who are unfamiliar with her name, is the actress who appeared alongside DiCaprio in the 2000 drama The Beach. Speaking of the on-screen kiss she shared with DiCaprio in the film, Ledoyen said that it lacked any honest passion or genuine sensitivity. Ledoyen was so unimpressed by Leonardo DiCaprio’s ability as a kisser that she claims to not have any clear memory of their scenes together.
2. Tom Cruise According To Thandie Newton
There was a time when women would have traveled from the four corners of the globe to share a kiss with Tom Cruise. In fact, I’m sure there are plenty of straight men who would have done the same simply to see what it was like to make out with Hollywood’s number one heartthrob. Over the past couple of years, however, this obsession with Cruise has faded and most women wouldn’t be so eager to lock lips with him. This is likely owing to Cruise’s fanatical devotion to Scientology and the fact that he is, you know, kinda absolutely out of his mind. That being said, I can’t help but wonder if his reputation as a kisser was damaged by Thandie Newton’s negative review of his making out abilities.
According to Newton, who starred alongside Cruise in 2000’s Mission: Impossible 2, making out with Tom Cruise is “slightly icky and sort of wet”. In fact, Newton hated kissing Cruise so much that she claims to have gone home every night of filming complaining about how many times she had to do it.
1. Woody Allen According To Helena Bonham Carter
Woody Allen has dated a collection of beautiful actresses throughout his career, each of them completely out of his league yet equally in love with the little neurotic writer and director. Many assume that in order to score such incredible women, the nebbish Allen must be absolutely incredible in bed. I, thankfully, cannot offer any evidence for or against this, but I can say that many of the actresses who have had on-screen kisses with Allen have not been impressed by his technique.
According to Helena Bonham Carter, who shared a kiss with Allen in the 1995 comedy Mighty Aphrodite, the comedian is very stern when it comes to kissing scenes and makes it very clear that no fluids should be exchanged during the process. Carter even likened Allen’s lack of passion during their make out sessions to kissing the Berlin Wall.
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