Most men throughout the course of their life have a moment that will forever be etched in their minds. Maybe a one-night stand comes back to haunt them, or a girlfriend comes home and says, “Baby, I’m pregnant!” For most couples (hopefully they’re married) this is a joyous time where they get to introduce a baby boy or girl into this world within the next nine months.
For other men, the news of a baby on the horizon isn’t so awesome. Unplanned pregnancies can take the steam right out of the sails of any unsuspecting person. Especially if he thinks that the woman he slept with was a mistake. Most of us boys have been there. Scary shit, huh? The fear is very real but so was lust that night you spent sleeping with you’re supposed baby momma, right?
For years now there’s been a television show named The Maury Show that can take the guess work out of parenting a child that isn’t yours. The famous talk show offers DNA testing for its guests that are in this situation. It will floor you how many people actually are if you haven’t seen the show! So we made a list of the ratchet girls who got owned — and shocked — on Maury when their man was revealed as not the father.
15. Oh Hell No!
The fact that this girl could even have a grin on her face while sitting in that chair is shocking isn’t it? Especially when she finds out that the results of her DNA test reveal that who she has been saying the father is, isn’t. Yup, that’s her mother beside her on stage as well. You can almost see the horror (not whore) written all over her face as Maury says to her daughter, “the DNA tests are in and sorry he is not the father.” You’d think the daughter would be mortified as well wouldn’t you? Don’t worry readers, as you work your way down the list today you’ll see plenty of faces that are.
14. Stunned And On The Run
For those of us who have gotten the chance to see the Maury Show and the DNA testing it offers to men and women, we know when “the results are in” everyone in the building goes absolutely ballistic. The crowd starts to scream; some man jumps up in the air as if he’s won the lottery, or falls to the floor grovelling. Take this funny photo for instance. This girl bolts off Maury’s stage faster than she ever ran in P.E. class that’s for sure. As you can see she’s hysterical, and she should be. The man next to her isn’t the father of her child, and he seems really happy about that. Can you blame him? Nope.
13. Priceless Reaction Isn’t It?
Classic reactions of potential dads who were told on Maury that they were “not the father” are plastered all over the web. This one though captures the very essence of this article, and that’s why it’s sitting here at the number 13 spot on our list today. This guy’s expression screams you are “not the father” in the most hilarious way possible, doesn’t it? Honestly, if I saw this guy’s face on a t-shirt at Spencer Gifts, I’d have a hell of a hard time not buying it. The reaction in this photo is epic don’t you think? I’d be willing to wager you’d be the life of the party with this guy’s face printed on your shirt wherever you went.
12. My Husband Isn’t The Father?
To say that I heart this video is such an understatement it’s not funny! I can’t stop laughing. I’ll just leave it at that. I do have to write this listicle after all, and I can’t sit here all day laughing my ass off (wish I could). I’ll leave the giggles up to you readers! When cruising the internet, I came across this video of Shekeita and her baby Brian’s attempt at finding out if Kieary is his father. Needless to say, the results don’t come in the way Shekeita planned. The excitement however from the potential baby’s daddy is beyond entertainment! See for yourself; you won’t be disappointed.
11. Put Your Hands In The Air
It would be pretty tough to find any man more excited that he’s “not the father” than Avery appears to be in this photo while on the Maury Show. After Maury announces the good news (for Avery) that he isn’t the father of Lashanda’s son he runs into the crowd to celebrate. As you can see on the faces of all the guests, they’re just as pumped up at the results as he happens to be. There is one person that isn’t smiling, though, and she happens to be sitting on stage. Naturally, this listicle is meant to be funny and humorous but when the DNA results come in, you know someone’s going to get their feelings hurt.
10. All In The Family
The YouTube videos on this list are amazingly funny. If you’re looking to read and watch pure comedy today well then you’ve come to the right place. In terms of videos showing the reactions of Maury’s guests when they’re told that the man they thought was the father of their child isn’t, this YouTube video rocks! It begins with a woman whose man left her when she was four months pregnant. Pretty horrible thing to do to a gal, huh? Well, that’s not all he did. This guy actually left his pregnant girlfriend for her cousin. In the end, his antics go unnoticed as I’m sure you can imagine. Flipping awesome and there’s even a cake!
9. In Your Face!
This photo is one of those photos that speaks a thousand words, wouldn’t you say? It isn’t very difficult to find out which one of these women is happy with the DNA results and which one knows she looks like a trifling hoe. If the finger pointing doesn’t clue you in well enough, then it might be time to get your eyes checked. You can almost read the disappointment all over the guest’s face that’s sitting in the chair. She’s apparently shocked at the DNA results telling her that the man she’s claimed all along to be the father of her child is most definitely not. On Maury, the DNA results don’t lie, so on to the next guy!
8. He Knew It All Along
Now let’s not get into how many sexual partners is too many to have. If you’re even counting in the back of your head then, by all means, that’s a good sign. For the rest of us, let’s just keep reading this fantastically entertaining listicle, and I’ll keep writing it. With that being said if any woman has slept with 34 dudes and isn’t quite sure who the father of her child is that’s a really, really big problem. Why? Because all 34 men that this girl screwed were around the same time that’s why! That’s putting in some work don’t you think guys? Damn, girl, you should at least be getting paid, not giving it away!
7. Back Flips And Everything
This dude is so sure he’s not the father of this girl’s child that he’s promised to run through the crowd celebrating if he’s correct. As you readers soon will see this is one guy that is hoping with his whole heart that he’s “not the father” and rightfully so. He’s even promised the viewers a back flip or two if he’s right. You readers out there are just going to have to see for yourselves if he’s telling the truth. By the very nature of this list you’re here reading today, I’m going to bet you can make an educated guess? Either way, his reaction is one for the ages and undoubtedly belongs on our list.
6. You’ve Got To Be Kidding Me
Moyisha, Moyisha, Moyisha… How many times are you going to go on Maury before you find out who your baby’s daddy is? Apparently not 1, not 2, not even 6 times of publicly humiliating yourself was enough for this guest. As you can see this time around wasn’t any easier for Moyisha once she found out that Tommy wasn’t the father of her child. Maury, as he always does, tries to comfort the poor girl but she’s beyond help this time. Moyisha’s face falls into her hands in utter astonishment that her 6th DNA test on Maury revealed that yet another man was “not that father.” Tommy was lucky, though, and got to add his name to the list of men who don’t have to pay child support.
5. Uh Oh!
When looking for the perfect photo of guests who were told that the man they believed was the father of their child wasn’t, this one stuck out. Most of the photos you have seen on this listicle today show an embarrassed, shocked, even terrified woman, don’t they? You’d be terrified too if you were foolish enough to visit this show trying to find out who your baby’s daddy is. It boggles the mind that any person would want to subject themselves to this kind of scrutiny, right? Nonetheless there are females out there who are certain of who the father of their child is no matter how many men they’ve slept with. So was this girl until she got the results.
4. This Girl Goes 0-2
I love this clip of Maury’s “you are not the father” DNA results and you will too. You will never see a man so happy and then almost simultaneously so distraught at the outcome of a DNA test. Yes, this is a short video, but don’t let that fool you because it’s one of the best “you are not the father” moments on the list here today. The guest featured here has not 1 but 2 men on the Maury Show to prove that one of them is the father. But what happens when neither turn out to be the baby’s daddy? Well, you’ll just have to give up 20 seconds of your life and find out! It’s worth it, trust me!
3. She’s 100% Sure
Crystal is 100% sure that Micheal is the father of her child. So obviously when you’re sure you know who your baby’s daddy is you go on Maury and prove it, right? Shockingly enough Micheal has doubts as to whether he is the father of Crystal’s baby (Austin) because at the time she got pregnant they were just casually screwing each other. Weird, huh? Crystal in an ill-fated attempt to prove to Micheal that her baby is indeed his puts herself out there to be proven otherwise through DNA testing. After all, she wants to marry Micheal even though he was sleeping with her sister first. Oh my goodness is Crystal ever proven wrong on her 100% theory. In epic fashion as a matter of fact.
This is too much comedy in one place. I can barely contain myself. If the look on this girl’s face doesn’t show you she just received some unsettling news then look closer my friend! This photo comes courtesy of one of Maury’s episodes “I was a wild teen,” and judging by her reaction, she may have been just a bit too wild. In my opinion this is what a person might look like if they found out a serial killer was in their bedroom. Not this guest though, she was just told that the man she thought was her baby’s dad was “not the father.” I pray to whatever god is out there my face doesn’t ever look like hers does when she hears the horrible news.
1. She’s 5000% Sure
At number 1 on our list of Maury’s “you are not the father” is a girl that isn’t just 100%, not 200%, she’s 5000% sure that Andrew is the father of her kid. By the sound of her squeaky ass voice, I have a feeling that Andrew had heard that very same line via text message, phone calls, and late-night hate (voice) mails. I bet next time around she’ll be 6000% sure. This short YouTube video belongs here at number 1 based on Andrew’s reaction alone. Naturally, he finds out he’s “not the father” of this trifling girl’s child. Got lucky that time Andrew and please use a raincoat next time will ya kid!