There’s hardly a guy in the world who would be willing to give up doing the deed, but if offered a worthwhile alternative, they may forgo the dirty deed… at least for a while. If there were an offer on the table that seemed too good to pass up, a sex-crazed guy may just take a cold shower and accept the deal. Sure, they may get frustrated, but those are the stakes.
Of course, there are some men who would never give up the chance for some horizontal action, no matter what they could possibly gain if they were to abstain. Think of the 22-year-old horn dog who has sex on the brain 24/7. Or there’s the older gent with a wife of 25 years who may only get lucky twice a year. Offer him some sexual healing, and he’ll give you something in return!
But most guys are willing and able to give up sex if the option in its place is valuable enough. Listen: we’re not asking dudes to go sexless forever; we’re just asking them to give it up in a particular instance where they would get something else of their choice in its place — kinda like choosing between the pepperoni pizza or a cheeseburger. You’re not getting both, so which is more appealing to you? Not to say that sex with a woman is the same as chowing down on greasy food, but you get the idea — both are tempting and satisfying.
Here are 15 things guys might choose over sex. Which would you pick in place of getting frisky with a female? Or is nothing better than a good old “bump and grind”?
15. Watch Two Chicks Make Out
While this situation may turn a guy on to the point that he’s going to want to have sex in a major way, he may opt to watch two women get it on instead of having the opportunity to do it himself. One of the top male fantasies is to be able to watch two chicks get fun and frisky, so this swap may be the most popular one yet. While he’ll surely want to hop in and join the party, the guy’s choice to go sex-free will only allow him to remain on the sidelines. That said, a front-row view of the hot and heavy action won’t be a bad place to be for this dude. He may not be able to partake in the scenario, but he’ll have a lot of great memories!
14. A Weekend at the Playboy Mansion
OK, so this one is sort of a win-win, but a ton of sex-crazed gents would definitely opt for a sexy and sinful weekend at the renowned Playboy mansion in lieu of the chance to have actual sex. But after seeing all those breathtakingly hot half-naked women prancing around and sitting poolside, the frustration level would be off the charts. But to say they’ve been at the famous mansion is a prize in itself. The bragging rights would be unmatched, and the eye candy would be unforgettable. It would be a weekend that would go down in history as one of the best ever. Of course, these guys would want to bang everyone in sight, but they won’t be able to since they chose the weekend in paradise over the chance to get it on.
13. A Girlfriend or Wife Who Never Nags
Some guys are living with a woman who really bugs them with all their non-stop nagging. A man would gladly give up some sex if it meant that his woman would finally give him a well-deserved break and stop picking at him for every little thing. His life would be so much more relaxing, and he wouldn’t be constantly pissed off at his girlfriend or his wife. While he’s still fine with having sex with a nagging lady, he’d much rather take some time off away from the bedroom if, in return, she’d be nag-free. The constant criticism and put-downs are a real drag. No sex sucks, too, but a while without any action is worth it in the end when the nagging is finally nixed.
12. Season Tickets to Their Fave Team’s Game… Box Seats
For the sports-crazed guy, tickets, especially great seats to a ball game of any kind, are like nuggets of gold. And if he gets them free of charge, the thrill is even greater. What a score! If the home team is in the playoffs and a sports fanatic kind of guy can be right there amidst the non-stop action, he’d no doubt pick the great tix over getting it on with a woman, even if she’s a total babe willing to go all the way. He can get his taste of the fine female form by ogling the hot cheerleaders while he takes in the game of the year. As he enjoys his peanuts and Crackerjack, his sexless afternoon will go just fine, especially if his team wins the game. There’s always time for sex off-season.
11. All-You-Can-Eat Wings After a Late Night Out
After a late night out with the guys, some men don’t really feel like going home and getting it on with their lady, believe it or not. Too much alcohol can cause an otherwise OK-in-the-sack dude to have trouble “performing” anyhow. But what does a fella crave the most in the wee hours of the night? Food! All-you-can-eat hot and spicy wings with some bleu cheese dressing on the side would surely hit the spot after a long night chilling with the guys. A hungry guy would surely give up a night of nookie when delicious and juicy chicken wings are fresh out of the kitchen. They may not be all that good for ya, but they sure taste great, especially while drunk. Who’s getting hungry just thinking about a plate?
10. No Hangover After a Bachelor Party
There’s nothing more fun than a wild and crazy night with the guys at one of the boys’ bachelor parties. You’ve got sexy strippers, tasty food, great music, and of course, lots and lots of heavy drinking. The party will be a blast, but the aftermath, not so much. After all those shots and mixed drinks, a hangover is definitely going to be part of the picture the following morning. The headache, the nausea, and the all-over body pain are enough for a guy to swear off drinking in the future for good. But what if there would be no hangover to speak of if a guy gave up sex for the night? Those strippers were certainly hot, but don’t even try to get their phone numbers if you want that hangover-free day tomorrow. A fair swap? Sure, as long as the drinks keep flowing!
9. To Have a Bigger “Package”
Any guy who isn’t too “well-endowed” would certainly give up sex (if he’s getting any) for a bigger “unit” in return. If there’s one thing many men are concerned with, it’s the size (or lack of) of their manhood. Locker rooms can be a scary place when you’ve got the smallest “member” in the room filled with a sea of guys. Some dudes may worry that the woman they’re with will think their “package” is too small or the smallest they’ve seen thus far. Sure, they say size doesn’t matter, but no man wants to be the one to prove the sentiment to be true. Some time away from sex in order to become bigger in the nether-regions would be a swap any guy with a small weenie would be willing to make. The bigger, the better!
8. Watching Their Boss Get the Axe
Not too many people are all-too-fond of their boss, so to see one’s boss suffer could be a major thrill in the eyes of a disgruntled employee. A guy may just even give up sex to be able to witness his a-hole of a boss get fired publically from his job. When a boss is a real jerk, it can make an employee’s life a living hell day in and day out, so to see the man in charge get the boot can be just as satisfying as scoring with a woman in bed. Now, if a guy actually likes his boss and chooses this option, that would be an odd thing to do, but for the man who can’t stand his boss, forgoing sex to see him gone would be a no-brainer.
7. Free Alcohol
Beer drinkers, winos, and hard-liquor aficionados are all about a cool, stiff drink after a long hard work day, so going without booze can be a real doozy. But alcohol costs money and free drinks sound pretty good right about now. So, would a man give up a night of hot sex for a night of drinking with the guys? Sure, especially if the drinks are on the house. A nice bottle of merlot, a six-pack of beer, or a couple of shots of vodka sound pretty tempting, so what’s a night off from sex when you can get piss drunk instead? Hey, you may not even remember that you never scored anyway if you drink enough. Cheers to a sexless yet buzzed night! This gives “bottoms up” a whole new meaning!
6. Perfect Abs for the Summer
For the superficial types, a great body is worth whatever it takes to have one, even if that means no sex. Some guys are all about how they look, and a six-pack is what they need in order to feel cool and confident. They want to impress the ladies with their muscular body, but little will these ladies know that he won’t be able to have sex with them since he chose a good body over a good roll in the hay. Sure, he won’t have to go nookie-free forever, just for a while until he’s got the abs that are to his liking. Nobody aims for a beer belly, so a tight torso is the perfect look for summer. He can have sex once again come winter, when his abs will get a tad doughy and can be covered up with an ugly holiday sweater.
5. To Be 3 Inches Taller
Those dudes with a complex about their short height would surely give up some sex if they could be a few inches taller overnight. They would become far more appealing to the ladies seeking more of the “tall” in tall, dark, and handsome, and in turn, the fellow will probably get more sex than before thanks to the time off from sex. With these few added inches to his frame, the guy would have a new sense of swagger and feel a good deal better about himself, leading to more opportunities to score with hot gals. While a guy may want to get it on with a woman when he gets the chance, if he thinks of the big picture and refrains, he could have a life with his head held high in the sky.
4. A Bonus at Work “Just Because”
No sex but some extra cash? Why the hell not? If someone is willing to give a man a bonus at work for no reason at all, he’s surely going to pocket it without hesitation. He’d even be OK with giving up some sex in exchange for the free dough. The cost of living isn’t cheap these days, so any man who has bills to pay would be happy to take the cash instead of having a shot at rolling in the hay with a hottie. Heck, he can even use the extra cash to take a woman out for a nice evening and be a gentleman for once. A good job is hard to find, and a high-paying one is even harder. Some bonus money in lieu of a night or two with a honey would be a fair price to pay.
3. An Awesome Sports Car
Easy. No sex but a sports car instead? Where are the keys? So many men fantasize about having a super-fast and super-expensive sports car. Speeding through the streets in a foreign-made piece of ultra-modern machinery is a boyhood dream. But such cars are expensive, and not too many guys will ever see this dream come to fruition. But if they gave up sex for a while and were able to score a hot car for their willpower, then they’d be hitting the gas vs. hitting the sheets. Plus, once they could have sex again, this car would give the fella some added confidence that he could impress a whole new caliber of woman. He’d play some cool music, shine up the rims, and try to pick up chicks. Seems like a swap any car-loving lad would make in a heartbeat. Rev that engine, and take this one for a spin.
2. The Best J
This one isn’t exactly a bummer no matter how you look at it, but a lot of men would give up conventional sex for a life filled with BJs instead. They don’t have to do any work in the sack, and they’d still get all the pleasure they desire. Of course, the variety in the bedroom may not be as exciting or plentiful, but if a man’s into this type of action, then no sex would be no big deal. And if the woman he’s with is good at the “job,” then he made the right decision to give up going “all the way” for a BJ. Let’s just hope for this guy’s sake that he winds up with a lady who’s willing to put in the work.
1. To Get to Meet Their Favorite Celeb or Athlete
If guys had the amazingly cool opportunity to finally meet their all-time favorite actor, musician, athlete, or hero, they would totally be more than willing to reach into the depths of their willpower and not have any sex for a while. This once-in-a-lifetime shot to meet their idol is definitely worth some lonely sex-free nights. Sure, when they meet their fave celeb or athlete, they may be a little sexually frustrated, but those unpleasant feelings will surely subside once they’re caught up in this whirlwind moment of pure joy and a dream come true. Let’s hope they don’t tell their idol that they only got to meet them because they gave up sex… that would be awkward and a little creepy, to say the least. And don’t forget to get an autograph!
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