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15 Things Holly Madison Doesn’t Want You To Know

Entertainment

Some say when Holly Madison was a “girlfriend” at Hugh Hefner’s Mansion, she was the “clean up” girl. It’s not nice, but we’ll get to it later. And after leaving Hefner, she played Bo Peep and bared her silicone enhanced boobs in Las Vegas. And she wrote a tell-all book. In one corner, we have the Holly Madison who is a do-anything-for-fame X-Rated opportunist. In the other? Holly’s version of Holly. Holly the nice girl, victimized and preyed upon by a dirty old man. Some say she might even believe that stuff. But sometimes in Holly’s World it’s hard to know where the lies end and the delusions begin. So let’s take a look into that bizarre world, past, present and future. Let’s look at her early days at Hooters, her time at “that” Mansion, and her tell-all books that other Bunnies trash. And after Hef? Get ready for bared boobs, “noisy” night time pursuits and opportunistic publicity dating. Welcome to Holly’s World. Fasten your seat belts, it’s going to be a bumpy ride.

15. In The Beginning: Maxed Out Credit Cards, Bad Boob Jobs And A Self-Obsessed Rocker

Holly was a drifting sort of babe. A bit of college. A bit of waitressing in the Northwest. Then, she decides to move to Los Angeles. Having been turned down by Playboy when she was in high school, she has an aha! moment and maxes out her credit cards. For what? A boob job, that transformed those “A” twins into “D” twins. But, according to her fellow Mansion buddies, it was a bad boob job. So, anyway, her and her bad boob job move to Los Angeles where her career of choice is bending over working at Hooters when, reportedly, a blonde boy band star-of-the-moment takes a look at those assets and asks her out. No way, says Holly. He was totally self-absorbed. Oh, by the way, Hefner paid to turn the bad boob job into a good one. And a star is born.

14. Cue The Bunny Makeover

OK, it’s 2001 and 21-year-old Holly (then) Cullen is in Los Angeles scraping by and pulling shifts at Hooters. She’s behind on the rent and pretty desperate. What she wants is fame and fortune. But the problem is how to achieve it? Her assets? Fake boobs, blonde hair and a good bod. That’s about it. Plus, she’s desperate for a nose job. And then the eureka moment. Some say a friend of Hugh Hefner invited her to the Playboy Mansion. Some say she crashed a party or two. But whatever happened, pretty early on Hef is offering her Quaalude, his “thigh opening” drug of choice. So the choice is homelessness or the deed with a man old enough to be her grandfather. We all know the answer to that one, don’t we? Oh, by the way, she got the nose job. The plastic surgery courtesy of Hef is one of the perks of the job.

13. Hooters Heifer

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So, the world is divided into Holly supporters on one side  and Holly bashers on the other side. And one of the best of the bashers is the New York Daily News. After her book Down the Rabbit Hole came out in 2015, the rage was outraged and said: “What did this former Hooters heifer turned hooker-for-Hefner think when she begged her way into his decaying mansion in order to sexually service Drac in exchange for money, fame and bling? Did she think she was signing on to earn a degree in women’s studies?” Ouch. We think the degree in women’s studies quip is a nice stab in the back. We all know the price of fame and fortune in Hef-land. Yep, those cozy moments with the man himself.

12. Chez Hefner: The Clean Up Girl Who Would Do Anything

So, Holly makes it to the Mansion where she “swears like a stevedore” and agrees to do the deed with a grandfather substitute in exchange for that glamorous lifestyle she felt she totally deserved. Was there a price to pay? Oh yes, there was. Over to another Girl Next Door and world-class Holly-basher, Kendra Wilkinson who says Holly would do kinky stuff the other girls wouldn’t touch. OK. And? Sweet little Holly, according to Kendra, was the “clean up” girl. Clean up? Think tongue and bits of Hef and you’ll probably get there. Another Mansion inmate, Izabella St. James, sold her exclusive to the Daily Mail with talk of Holly “happily” doing “sexually depraved acts that none of Hefner’s other girlfriends would perform”. The mind boggles. Since then, Holly has tried to sell the world the idea that she was the victim. Nice try, but no cigar, babe.

11. The Real Girls Next Door: The Quickie With Hef

Well, The Girls Next Store reality show made it look like one long sorority sleepover. The reality? In Madison’s tell-all book Down the Rabbit Hole, we learn of nightly gatherings of Bunnies in Hef’s room. It’s all pink PJs, girls making out with one another while Hef services himself. Apparently, he always finished solo. Did we mention the adult films blaring or the quickies with granddad? Now, the thing is this, most Bunnies last a year or two or three in the Mansion. The whole thing is not conducive to high self worth, is it? Now, what kind of babe hangs around for this kind of crap for seven or eight years. In two words: Holly Madison. Why? Holly says she was trapped. Some say she wanted her “Mrs.” degree and a chunk of the empire.

10. Do Anything Holly On Top

Pre-nose-job Holly pretty in pink with her grandfather. No, Hugh Hefner. Reportedly, Hef had an obsession with Marilyn Monroe. So Holly goes off and gets her hair cut and slaps on red lipstick. Hef has a maroon jacket. So, Holly gets a maroon jacket. Hefner eats chicken soup out of a can. Holly eats chicken soup out of a can. And she is doing the stuff nobody else wants to do and is still “cleaning up”. Disgusting, isn’t it? And gradually it is “Holly On Top”. She becomes numero uno, number one, chief girlfriend. Is she popular with the other girls she reportedly shafted on her way to the “top”? Well, not quite. But then, reports are that she was whispering the “M” word in Hef’s ear and he was not listening. So, in 2009, it’s adios Mansion. Hello world.

9. After The Fall: Hot Guys And Missing Protection

Ex Bunny Holly Madison never had any trouble attracting guys. But keeping them? See, in Holly’s World it is just always their fault. Like the self-absorbed rocker she wouldn’t date or the insecure Vegas magician she moved in with after the Mansion era. A convenient port in the storm. Just like the Mansion. Then there was talk of wild s*x with a hot actor and a rubber being in the wrong place. Some say Holly is the Ariana Grande of Bunny Land. Nothing, but nothing, is ever her fault. What’s the psycho babble term? Sociopath or something. Whatever. And after leaving the Mansion she was one busy girl. But it never lasted. Why are we not surprised?

8. Noisy Nights In With Russell Brand?

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Hey, Russell Brand is the English actor/comedian who broke up with wife Katy Perry by text. No kidding. A real jerk. So who better for do anything Holly to date after she leaves the Playboy Mansion? Besides, it’s good press for a girl whose assets are what you see. While she’s figuring out what’s next, some say Holly and Russell hook up and there’s talk of loud, groaning and “having fun” noises in the night coming from her house. But, surprise, surprise, it just doesn’t last. If it happened at all. And months later Russell “the Jerk” Brand, is down on his knees proposing to Katy Perry.

7. Of Las Vegas, Peepshow and Cellulite

So, it is 2009 and Holly is an ex-Bunny living in Las Vegas amid talk of noisy nights and bikini filled days. And then comes Peepshow. What do you get when you mix the Bo Peep fairytale with burlesque? You know the kind of thing, little Bo Peep learning the facts of life and exposing her boobs. You get Las Vegas’ Peepshow. So, in 2009, Holly starts a stint as the Bo Peep headliner of the naughty-but-nice, some say barely “R-Rated”, revue. The best that can be said is that her boobs looked a treat when she did the big reveal. But otherwise? She was pretty bad and many say without the infamy of her Bunny days, she would have been just another silicone-enhanced blonde babe in search of a male meal ticket. Some say the show revealed something interesting about Holly: Her cellulite.

6. Lies And Delusions And A Very Bad Reality Show

We should point out two very good things about Holly. No, not the twin Ds. Apparently she has great publicity managers. And she talks to the press, a lot. So, the bashing by those New York papers and Kendra Wilkinson is kind of overwhelmed. So, it’s 2009 and you’re Vegas Holly doing Peepshow at Planet Hollywood. Ticketmaster is selling exorbitantly priced seats so far back that you need a telescope to see her “Ds” on display and someone comes to Holly and says let’s do a “reality show” called Holly’s World. We’ll set it around Peepshow and give the world the “real” Holly. The fun, hard working and oh-so-nice Holly. It was on for two years. And some say the show tries very hard to make a do-anything X-Rated opportunist look like a babe next door. You know, Daisy Dukes meets Bo Peep. See, in Holly’s World it’s sometimes hard to tell where the lies end and the delusions begin.

5. Do Anything Holly And Publicity Dating

So, clean up Bunny Holly is baring her boobs and pretending to channel a Bo Peep vibe with her very own reality show. She’s even listed as a co-producer. Give us a break, many say. This, at the same time remember as those missing condoms and noisy nights. Cue bad boy rocker, now-married-to-Camron-Diaz Benji Madden. It’s lust at first sight and Madden and Bo Peep become an item. There’s lots of speculation in the press. Lots of publicity. Now, we have a question? If you are D-List Holly dating B-List Madden, wouldn’t it be a “good thing” to get him on your reality show? In a word: Yes. So, Madden is approached. He smells a publicity-seeking rat and runs a mile. Bye bye, Bo Peep. And in Holly’s World? Nothing to do with her. It was those nasty production people. Sure, we believe you. Not.

4. That Book

So, fast forward to 2015. Holly’s retired from the Peepshow and is married to Las Vegas show promoter Pasquale Rotella. They have a daughter they named Rainbow. Sounds like a great name for a stripper some said. Rainbow Rotella has a nice stripper vibe and all. And presto, Holly of clean up Bunny and Bo Peep fame has moved into her mommy, girl-next-door phase. She’s wearing clothes now when she gets her picture taken. Well, she is on the down hill slide to 40 after all. So, how do you make a lot of money and pretend that you were an innocent victim at Hefner’s hands? You write 2015’s Down the Rabbit Hole, in which you talk of your despair and fear in the Mansion that made you a household name. Hef’s son’s verdict? She’s just a sh*tty person.

3. Only No Publicity Is Bad Publicity: Will The Real Holly Stand Up?

Many say Down the Rabbit Hole was written for two reasons: First, because Holly wanted to white wash her past sins. And second? Because she was totally p*ssed off that Hefner wouldn’t consider marriage to her. He may have been half-dead, but stupid he wasn’t. Kendra Wilkinson, for one, is convinced that Holly bore a grudge against the old man who got away from her planned trip down the altar. So, even now, Holly never misses an opportunity to diss the guy who put her on the map. Back in 2016 when Game of Thrones character Littlefinger is depicted as a man who uses others for his own “selfish gains”, our Holly can’t resist Tweeting: “Everyone has a #Littlefinger pass through their lives at some point”. Not so subtle some say. Not nice many say. But oh, so typical of Holly.

2. The Dream Man And The Felony Charge

Back to mommy and girl next door Holly and hubby (multi-millionaire, by the way) Pasquale Rotella. They married in 2013. Pasquale’s thing is promoting electronic music events and the like. But a year or so ago, there was a spot of trouble in Holly’s World when hubby was charged with bribery, embezzlement and conspiracy. Some kind of plea bargain deal was struck and he was off the hook. But he’s clearly mastered the Holly approach to truth, saying that the charges were politically motivated and no more than a distraction. But still, he had to cough up $150,000 by way of a fine. Some distraction.

1. Holly’s Biggest Problems: Advancing Age And Lack Of Talent

So A-Cup Holly goes to D-Cup Holly, moves to Los Angeles and progresses from Hooters to the Playboy Mansion. Without that and Hefner, where would she be? Nowhere, some say. Then, she leaves the Mansion (some say in a huff), bares her boobs in Las Vegas and does a La-La Land reality show. Would that have happened without Hefner? Nope. So, having dissed just about everybody she’s every come into contact with, Holly then writes a tell-all book or two in which she trashes and makes fun of the man who is responsible for her fame and fortune. Hugh Hefner. Approaching the “Big 40”,  now married with two kids (Rainbow and Forest) and doing her mommy, girl next door impersonation, Holly has yet again reinvented herself. But, the only thing is, the joyride she has had at Hefner’s expense is over. So, what next? Who knows. Or cares.

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