There’s something about certain moms in certain movies that drive us guys kind of crazy. Well, when they’re ridiculously hot anyway. Who could possibly forget Stifler’s mom in American Pie? She just oozed sex appeal and did so in a way that would make every teenage boy in America totally excited and feel awful about themselves all at the same time. When most people think about moms in movies, she’s the one that they think of not because she was so hot — although she was — but more so because she totally just put it all out there on the table. There was no subtlety there at all, not even a little bit.
There are other movie moms out there, though, who, while they weren’t quite as over the top as Stifler’s mom, were actually even hotter. This, of course, is up for debate. Everyone has a different thing they’re looking for when it comes to hot moms; it’s a confusing subject after all. All I know is when I’m looking at hot moms, I know it when I see it. I imagine that the same thing applies to you. Take a look at the following list and see if you agree with me; I’m sure you will on at least some of them.
Here are 15 Movie Moms That are Hotter Than Stifler’s.
15. Vivica Fox – Independence Day
Okay, so this is an honest question: are there actually moms out there that are as hot as Vivica Fox is in Independence Day? It seems like that would be impossible. Seeing a mom as hot as she is in real life is sort of akin to coming across Bigfoot or the Abominable Snowman. I’m just not buying it. Of course, this is Hollywood after all, and Vivica Fox is actually a real person, at least as far as I know. Who knows, though, really? No matter how you slice it, Vivica is one hot mother. And I mean that in the nicest way possible. Like a lot of the other moms on this list, she’s getting up there in age a bit when it comes to real life, but she still looks amazing, which I’m sure comes as no surprise to most of you.
14. Diane Lane – Unfaithful
Now, I could’ve picked Diane Lane for her role as Superman’s adopted mother, but instead, I picked her for her role in Unfaithful, where she plays a mom who cheats on her husband. Either way, she’s played two super hot moms no matter how you slice it, but I still had to lean toward the role where she was a little bit sexier — okay, let me take that back — a lot sexier. Not only that, but who would screw around with Superman’s mom? Whether she was his adopted mom or not, it honestly does not seem like a good idea, not even a little bit, actually, although if I were to risk such a thing, I suppose I would give it a shot for Diane Lane. She’s been truly gorgeous for a while now and doesn’t show any signs of changing anytime soon.
13. Heather Graham – The Hangover
Okay, so sure, she left her baby in a closet with a tiger — but who cares right? Heather Graham is one of the hottest ladies ever, and when it comes to her role in The Hangover, she totally struts her stuff. Some of these moms are even kind of unbelievable. I mean, sure, there possibly could be a mother that looks kind of like Heather Graham, but there likely isn’t. For one thing, Heather Graham doesn’t have any kids. I’m not saying she would be less hot if she had kids; I’m just saying she would look more like a mom if she did have kids. Are you following me? I’m not sure if I’m even following myself at this point. All I’m saying is, is Heather Graham hot? Totally. Does she look like a mom? Not even a little bit.
12. Jennifer Lopez – The Boy Next Door
So it probably comes as no surprise to you that we find Jennifer Lopez hot. You don’t have to be Bill Nye, the science guy, to figure out that sort of thing, obviously. The Boy Next Door is a cautionary tale about what happens when a mom starts doing it with a younger guy that turns out to be a total psycho, but let’s be honest here: that whole message kind of gets lost in the thought of what it would be like to be a young guy that was having an affair with Jennifer Lopez. The rest of the plot honestly doesn’t even matter. It’s just like “Hey, that young dude is having an affair with Jennifer Lopez!” That honestly could’ve been the entire movie, but if that were the case, it probably would’ve been a different kind of film.
11. Jane Seymour – Wedding Crashers
Jane Seymour is hot in a different way than a lot of these women are. In fact, she’s hotter in a different way than almost any of these women are. She’s pretty much the exact opposite of Stifler’s mom, now that I think of it. While Stifler’s mom is all curves and bawdy sexuality, Seymour in Wedding Crashers, and in pretty much any other movie she’s even been in actually just exudes class — not to say that she doesn’t give off her own brand of sexuality, too, because she does, without a doubt. She’s just a totally gorgeous woman, and she continues to be so. Even though she’s getting up there a bit in years, she’ll always be a lock for lists such as these. She’s just too gorgeous to ignore.
10. Linda Hamilton – Terminator
While some of you that may be a bit on the younger side of things may not get this one, those of us that were born at a certain time, certainly do. Linda Hamilton had been around for a little while before the first of the Terminator films, and although she was hot enough, she wasn’t anything to get all that excited about. That all changed when she started to act in the Terminator franchise. She’s pretty much the exact opposite of Stifler’s mom. While she’s totally ripped and would do anything to protect her son, Stifler’s mom is totally curvy and would do anything for a martini and some Xanax. Hey, I’m not trying to judge, mind you. One of them just fits my lifestyle just a little bit better than the other; I’ll keep you guessing which one that might be.
9. Christina Applegate – Vacation
A lot of people don’t even know that Christina Applegate played a mom in the newest version of Vacation. After all, why should they? The only actor that really matters in a Vacation movie is Chevy Chase, but let’s face it: he looks ways to odd now and is way too old to pull off a starring role like that. It’s long past time to put this movie franchise to bed. But speaking of bed, Christina Applegate always, and I do mean always, looks totally amazing. She was hot when she played a daughter on Married With Children and is just as hot, or maybe even more so playing a mom. In fact, I wouldn’t bet against Christina continuing to look hot forever. While it’s not likely that she’s immortal, I certainly wouldn’t bet against her continuing to look hot while she’s still around.
8. Linda Cardellini – Avengers 2
Linda is totally hot and played the wife of Hawkeye and the mother of his two children in Avengers 2. Wives of superheroes are always a little problematic in movies. On the one hand, it sort of humanizes the superheroes and makes them easier to relate to, but on the other hand, as soon as they appear on screen, you just wait for them to be kidnapped and to be put in some sort of peril. It really is kind of a huge weakness if you’re a superhero and have a wife and kids to take care of as well. But hey, we get it. Linda is so good-looking that one can see why Hawkeye would choose to tie the knot. After all, what fun is kicking all sorts of villains’ butts all day if you don’t have something hot to come home to?
7. Beverly D’Angelo – National Lampoon’s Vacation
Of all of the hot moms in movies that ever were, Beverly D’Angelo simply does not get enough credit. She starred in all of the Vacation movies with Chevy Chase, and she was totally hot in all of them. I’m not sure why she’s not often talked about as a good example of a smoking hot mom in cinema, but maybe that will change now. All of those movies were super funny, and D’Angelo herself is an amazing comic actress, but when it all comes down to it, she was pretty amazing eye candy as well. Clark Griswold was a total ‘dumbstick;’ there’s no doubt about that whatsoever, but he was a total ‘dumbstick’ that had a super hot wife, who also happened to be a mother as well.
6. Jobeth Williams – Poltergeist
When one is talking about hot moms in movies, one simply cannot possibly forget about JoBeth Williams in Poltergeist. This was a truly freaky movie and is not the thing that you usually would think of when you’re thinking of hot moms. Nevertheless, she was totally smoking in it. She was a cool mom and also was pretty brave, refusing to leave the house even though it was obviously a super terrifying bad scene in there. All the while that she was being terrorized and haunted, she still looked absolutely amazing. What is it about scary movies that they’re better when the chick that’s being messed with is so hot? I don’t even want to know what that says about our society as a whole.
5. Julia Roberts – Erin Brockovich
Either guys think that Julia Roberts is super hot, or they don’t get all that worked up over her. I’ve always been one of the latter, which is odd since I kind of like big chicks, and Julia is without a doubt that. But the standard changes when you’re talking about moms somehow. Now, I’m not saying that moms are not hot. What I am saying is, when you come across a certain way and you’re a mom, there’s definitely a bit of a different vibe going on. Julia has not played a whole lot of mothers in her time. She’s usually the romantic lead, of course, but in Erin Brockovich, she did play a mother, and she looked pretty darn amazing while she was doing it. I dare bet you would definitely kick Stifler’s mom out of bed if Julia showed up.
4. Maria Bello – A History of Violence
This one almost isn’t fair, to be honest with you. In A History of Violence, Maria, who plays a wife and, of course, a mom, at one point dresses up in her old cheerleader uniform in part to turn on her husband, who is played by Viggo Mortensen. After she puts it on, her husband is, of course, pretty turned on, and they go on to get it on, and in a way, that seems rather enjoyable for both of them. Talk about perfect. So the dude has a sexy wife, who is a great mom, and she also still dresses up like a high school cheerleader and looks pretty awesome doing it. I mean, let’s be honest, shall we? As hot as Stifler’s mom is, she never could’ve pulled off a cheerleader’s outfit, not in a thousand years.
3. Uma Thurman – Kill Bill
Next on the list of movie moms that are way hotter than Stifler’s is Uma Thurman, who played a mother in Kill Bill. It’s well known that the director of this movie, who is Quentin Tarantino, of course, has it pretty bad for Uma Thurman. For one thing, she’s in a ton of his movies; for another thing, he often fixates on her with his camera for a long time. In particular, he often spends a lot of time checking out her feet. So my point here is, let’s not take the whole “cast as a mother” thing too far. Let’s be honest: Tarantino could’ve been looking for someone to cast as a circus clown, and he probably would’ve picked Uma Thurman. Not that I’m complaining; she’s totally hot and way hotter than Stifler’s mom.
2. Natalie Portman – Star Wars
Okay, so how hot is it to give birth to the children of Darth Vader? On second thought, don’t answer that; I honestly don’t really want to know what you think. The mind reels. Natalie Portman is just straight up gorgeous, especially because she also stars in the Star Wars franchise. It simply isn’t fair to compare her to the likes of Stifler’s mom. It just simply isn’t fair to be as hot as she is and also be in a movie that all sorts of geeks love. She just covers all of the bases. One other thing: even though she’s been starring in films since the mid-90s, she’s still only 35 years old. She simply is not very fair competition for the other movie moms; she’s just way too hot for most of the competition.
1. Emilia Clarke – Terminator Genisys
I almost feel bad for saying this because I already put Linda Hamilton on this list, but Emilia is, in my opinion, not only the hottest screen mom ever but also the hottest Sarah Connor ever. And it sort of goes without saying that Stifler’s mom couldn’t play Sarah Connor, not unless Sarah Connor was rewritten to enjoy Marlboro Lights. I don’t know; maybe it’s because I’ve seen Emilia naked on Game of Thrones, and if you’re lucky, you have, too. And now that I think of it, she plays a mother there, too, although, of course, it’s dragons that she’s the mother of. But then again, how cool is that? And how cool is Emilia Clarke, who is one of the very hottest, if not the hottest screen mother ever?
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