Most people are glad 2017 is gone for many reasons, and celebrity deaths is one of them. We all know that 2016 was a horrible year for celebrity deaths. In just one year we lost so many different celebrities that meant a lot to us as a culture. David Bowie, Prince, George Michael, Carrie Fisher, and many more, all passed away this year. Of course this happens every year, but 2016 seemed even worse than most. Well, I hate to break it to you, but 2017 is not going to be any different. We are all getting older, and because of that the people that we cared about most are going to be passing away at a more alarming rate than ever.
So who is it going to be? Some of the people on this list are folks that might pass away simply because they are starting to get older, while others are on the list because they live their lives in such a way that it is amazing they are still kicking. Others are just wildcards, that show no real sign of passing away, but still they somehow stay on the radar.
Now of course, we don’t want any of these people to die, not even a little bit. That isn’t cool for one thing, and for another thing, that is totally bad karma. But over the next year there are only two things that are certain, and those, my friends, are death and taxes. Here are the 15 celebrities most likely to die in the year 2017.
15. Keith Richards
One of the things that is perhaps most surprising in the world is that Keith Richards is still with us, but at 73-years-old he is still going strong. As we all know he is one of the founding members of the Rolling Stones, and one of the best, and most influential, guitarists of all time. When one thinks of bad living, it is pretty hard to come up with anyone that has partied more, and put more unhealthy things into his body, than Keith Richards. Now Keith is pretty cool, there is no doubt about that, so we certainly hope that he does not leave us in the year 2017, but if you were a betting man you would have to pick him in the pool. But in all honesty, Keith will probably end up outliving all of us. Maybe he has a deal with the devil of some sort.
14. Lamar Odom
Lamar Odom is only 37-years-old and is a former professional basketball player. So why would he be on a list like this? Well, he tends to party just a bit too much, and has done so for a long time. In fact on October 13, 2015, he was found unconscious at a brothel in Nevada. He was put on life support as he had several strokes and kidney failure. After that he was divorced from his wife, Khloe Kardashian. He supposedly is doing well and says he is going to try and get her back. All this is cool, and we certainly hope that Lamar keeps doing okay and all of that, but you know Lamar, after the way you have been rolling for the past few years, you just are not a good bet to make it through 2017. Don’t shoot the messenger.
13. Charlie Sheen
Charlie Sheen is only 51-years-old, but still he has to be a part of a list like this; he is just way too crazy not to be when you think about it. Unless you have been living under a rock you don’t need me to detail his rise and fall, which started with him being a huge star and ended up with him being a huge joke. But think about it, is Charlie Sheen going to pass away at a ripe old age after being laid up in a nursing home? That is a very difficult thing to imagine. Guys like him don’t get old, do they? His star has been fading for quite some time, which makes one wonder what could possibly get his name back out there to the same extent? Well, there is nothing like an early and unexpected death to make your stock rise.
12. Justin Bieber
Sometimes you have to just pick a total wildcard when it comes to lists of this nature. Justin Bieber is only 22-years-old, which is insane when you think about it. Doesn’t it seem like he has been around forever? So while there are really no actual reasons to put him on this list, let’s just call it a hunch. Who would make a bigger splash with an early death more than Justin Bieber? Maybe just Miley Cyrus, but somehow I can picture her when she is like 90-years-old, yelling at kids to get off her lawn. Justin Bieber? Not so much. Could anyone picture him as an old man? If you say yes, you get a pass, but if you say no, then don’t give me a hard time. If he doesn’t get old, he is going to pass away, and it might be in 2017. You can’t have it both ways.
11. Ozzy Osbourne
Good old Ozzy. He is just 68-years-old, but it seems like he has been around forever. He started way back in the 70s as the lead singer of Black Sabbath; after he was fired from that gig, he had a very successful career as a solo artist, then ended up having a bit of a career as a reality TV star. Now he may appear a bit like your drunk and doddering old uncle at this point, but do not be fooled, Ozzy has dabbled in pretty much every single excessive substance that one can imagine over his life, and that stuff has to take its toll. We would not be surprised if 2017 was the year that happened. One thing in his favor though is that he is married to Sharon Osbourne– it is highly unlikely that she would allow him to pass away.
10. Charles Manson
Charles Manson is one of the best known criminals in our, or any other generation, which is why he makes this list of celebrities. He was the leader of the Manson Family, which was a murderous cult out of California in the 60s. Believe it or not, he is also 82-years-old. One would think that in all this time in prison he would have angered someone enough to finish him off before he died of natural causes, but it seems he is one of those dudes that is just too crazy for anyone to mess with, even in prison. Sooner or later, though, he is going to have to die, and at 82-years-old this may finally be the year. Why is it that beloved stars like Prince and Robin Williams die so young and some guy like Manson lives well into his 80s? Life can be unfair, but we knew that.
9. Joan Collins
Some of these stars you probably thought had passed away already, and you are going to be surprised that they are still kicking. Joan, I am sorry if you happen to be reading this, but I truly thought your time had already come. Joan Collins was one of the biggest movie stars of her generation, and also was popular both on television and as an author. Many people know her from her role on Dynasty. She is now 83-years-old. Now she does seem the type that could live on to a very ripe old age, there is no doubt about that, but still, she has to be high on a list like this. Not so much because she is so old, but more because she has the sort of iconic presence that would get a lot of attention when she passed away.
8. Courtney Love
Courtney Love is just 52-years-old, and is best known for her band Hole. Actually, that is totally untrue. What she is best known for is the super destructive relationship that she was in with Kurt Cobain before he died. Now, I don’t mean any of this to be mean, and I mean that in this entire article, but would anyone really be surprised if they looked on the web and saw that she had passed away? I know I wouldn’t. Love is somebody that once had a bit of a career, but is mostly famous for being famous. She is kind of like a less attractive Paris Hilton who spent her life living a lot harder. While she most certainly will make it through the year, it will not surprise us if she does not.
7. Jerry Lewis
Jerry Lewis is now 90-years-old. He is best known to older people for his work as a comedian in movies, often teaming up with the singer and actor Dean Martin, and to people under the age of 60 he is known mostly for his annual telethon that he hosted for the Muscular Dystrophy Association. Lewis is also widely known for being a total jerk. If you think that I am making that up, check this incredibly horrible video in which he is a complete douchebag to an interviewer. People who are as mean as Jerry Lewis is often live for a really long time, it just seems to be the way things go, but still he is getting up there in age and at some point he is going to go. Will 2017 be the year? We will have to wait and see.
6. Bill Cosby
Good old Bill Cosby. He used to be the guy that everyone wanted as a dad, then he turned into the guy that everybody wanted to put in prison for allegedly drugging and date raping numerous women for decades. Cosby is 79-years-old now, and if I were him I would be praying for the release of sweet death before I would want to put up with another 10-20 years on earth living in humiliation. In fact, he has been charged with three felonies that he is to stand trial for in June of 2017. Would it really surprise anyone if he passed away before it all went down? Now again, this article is not meant to be rude towards anyone, even if they committed all sorts of nasty felonies, but Bill Cosby has to be on the list, and be near the top of it.
5. Bob Barker
Bob Barker is a huge icon in television. While he has never been considered a true star, he is certainly one of the most famous and well respected men in show business. He also is 93 years old now. The former host of The Price is Right was on that show for around 35 years before retiring in the year 2007. That is right, he kept hosting that show well into his 80s, and he still was better than Drew Carey, I don’t care what anyone says about it. He also was the host of The Miss Universe and the Miss USA competitions. The thing is though, he really is getting up there at this point, and this list is not about folks that we want to pass away, but is more about people that might. Sorry to Bob Barker, but you made the list.
4. Donald Trump
All right, calm down. I’m not saying it would be a good thing if Trump passed away in 2017, and I know he is the president, but he also was the host of a reality TV show for years, which makes him a celebrity in my book. He is only 70-years-old, and seems to be in good health, but here is the thing, it is pretty obvious that Donald Trump is wound up pretty tight, there is no doubt about that. And when someone is wound up really tight and has a job that arguably is the most pressurized job in the world there is a chance that something might go down. Whether you should love him or hate him is up for debate, there is no doubt about that, but what is not debatable is that he belongs on this list.
3. Kirk Douglas
Sometimes people have to be put on a list like this, just because they are so darned old. Kirk Douglas, who is one of the most famous and iconic movie stars of his generation, as well as the father of Michael Douglas, is one of those people. I mean come on, the dude is 100 years old! Now if you met Kirk Douglas when he was 30 you probably would have guessed that he would make it to 100. The guy is just that cool. With that said, when you reach 100, you probably wonder if you are going to be around to see the next sunrise, not just to live long enough to be around for the entire year. Kirk, do not get me wrong, there is no doubt that I hope that you make it, but I am not too optimistic about the whole situation.
2. Paul McCartney
We all know of Paul McCartney of course. He is arguably the most famous and successful songwriter in the history of rock music. Paul McCartney seems to be in good health, but he is 74-years-old after all. Yes, he has managed to keep his boyish good looks, up to a point at least, and yes, he is married to a woman 20 years younger than him, but hey, time marches on. If he were to pass the only member of the Beatles left would be Ringo Starr. Now Ringo seems like a nice guy, but seriously? John Lennon, George Harrison, and Paul McCartney all pass away and the only one left is Ringo? These are the types of things that make one think that God does not exist, and that if he does exist he has an awful sense of humor.
1. Hugh Hefner
Hugh Hefner, who for those of you that are totally clueless is the head of Playboy Magazine, has belonged on lists of this nature for the past 20 years. I mean come on, let’s face it, the guy is 90-years-old, and has not exactly lived the most pure lifestyle. This is one of the crazy things about life; guys like Hugh Hefner and Keith Richards just keep rolling along day after day, and year after year, while someone that lives a good clean lifestyle croaks when they are 50 years old. Maybe 2017 will be the year it all goes down for Hefner, but I doubt it. If I were to guess, he will be around next year, and I will be writing his name down on that year’s list- that is if I make it that long. One never knows about such things after all.