It’s natural to choose clothes that flatter us most. We not only want to be presentable, we want to look good. Obviously, clothes are one of the first ways we present ourselves and we assume the only function of clothes is to make us look our best. Not much of us know that there is an entire market of clothes specifically for people who seem to be very squeamish about the more unflattering details of being human. We all poop, pee, pass gas and belch. We sweat, we get dirty, and we get sick. Sometimes embarrassing incidents with any of these things can cause us some mild trauma. Well- we hope it’s just mild but the existence of certain clothes point to the fact that many of us may have had a mishap when it comes to these social misdemeanors. Apparently it’s been many a person who got ridiculed for having that noticeable slip because there is an entire market of garments made for people are self conscious to the point of paranoia.
Maybe these garments are genius. We all know what it’s like to have to pass gas to the point where you bowels feel like it’s going to explode. Do you let it out in that elevator? Will they know it was you? We all know people move to other seats or away from you when you forgot to wear deodorant. And oh no- I’m in sweats and that hot girl just walked in. Just remember, if you ever have that misstep the existence of these clothes show that you’re not alone.
• Bloxers are designed
• For the chronically aroused
• Whose bodies act
• like they’re sixteen again
• preventing unwanted ‘showing’
• when it matters most
• Men who sweat a lot
• Can count on ‘the bro’
• Which covers the underarms
• and absorbs the sweat
• during those moments of high stress
• Shreddies are the answer
• When you can’t hold in the gas
• Farts are caught in the material
• And the smells can be washed out
• So you can stop blaming the other guy!