If you’ve ever lived with or are currently living with your partner, then settle in for a list that’s definitely going to ring true with you.
There was recent research conducted to help highlight some of the biggest turn-offs men experience when they first move in with a woman. This article covers issues ranging from having to deal with her love of trashy reality shows to being with someone who is an awful cook, to the simple realization that living with someone you love probably means that chores are also a pretty regular thing in your life, as opposed those good old days living the bachelor life.
There are definitely positives that come with living with your partner, but you’d be fooling yourself if even the happiest of relationships won’t be able to relate to at least some of the 15 items below.
Have a friend on social media that lives with their partner? Feel free to tag, or share this list on social media!
15. Her Hobbies
Below you will read about how living with your partner may require you to cut back on your own hobbies, but what if living together makes you realize that you hate what your girlfriend likes? You know your girlfriend loves trashy reality television shows, but now those trashy shows are going to be on your television set. Guess you’re going to learn more about The Real Housewives of Atlanta than you realized.
Sure, you love the tuque she made you last winter, but did you know how long knitting takes and what it’s like to have yarn all over the place?
You need to hope you’re with a partner that understands how important it is to have your own hobbies and life in order for a healthy relationship to flourish, and hopefully your hobbies or traits don’t turn your partner off as well.
14. Sharing Food
There is a classic moment in Friends where Joey exclaims “JOEY DOESN’T SHARE FOOD.” It’s a sentiment that is apparently shared by many men out there. 16% of men rated sharing food as being the toughest thing about living with someone, with the millennial generation speaking out the strongest against sharing the last bag of Doritos.
You may find it interesting to note that women become more concerned around food sharing as the relationship progresses, but that may be due to the fact that women primarily do most of the cooking. It can become increasingly frustrating when that last leftovers from the dinner you made constantly goes missing.
13. Different Libidos
One of the biggest factors to making sure you are in a healthy relationship is making sure you’re with someone with a libido that is on par with yours. You only want sex twice a week? That’s super cool, just hope your partner also agrees with it. You have a partner that wants it twice a day? The same principle applies. Perhaps your partner is used to having sex with you on every date, but now that you’re spending every night together, you’re realizing that your sexual desires don’t exactly match up on a daily basis.
Similarly, sex can seem really exciting at the start of a relationship, but many couples fall into a routine or stop prioritizing sex once they have been living together, and that too can be a huge turn-off.
12. Having To Deal With Chores
Let’s be honest, part of living with someone means that you are also going to have to do some chores. It’s not that these things wouldn’t get done if you were single, but your partner may just have a bigger issue if your dirty clothes are constantly piling up or you have a fort made up of old pizza boxes. Chores are definitely at the forefront for newlyweds, 70% of whom rated them as being the biggest priority on their mind when moving in. That thought definitely doesn’t go anywhere though. When men married 10+ years were also asked how concerned they were about chores, 74% of men ranked it as being their top concern.
Honestly, by that point in your relationship, you would have hoped that you and your partner would have worked out a system that works for the both of you. Chores aren’t the most fun, but they’re part of life and if you’re with a loving partner, completing them can be a huge opportunity for them to show their appreciation for you.
11. Getting Rid Of Your Stuff
You may think that everything in your house is well worth keeping, but your partner may have a much different opinion on the matter. When moving in with someone, it’s a delicate balance of give and take when deciding on how everything is going to get decorated.
Both men and women agree that women tend to have more items, but as a fun twist, both genders feel like they get rid of more of their own stuff during the move-in process. In an ideal world, you and your partner have a similar sense of style concerning how you want your place to be decorated. This becomes even easier if you’re moving into a brand new place, as opposed to moving into a co-existing living space. Even if you don’t have the same interests, dividing up your living space can allow both of your personalities to shine. Who says Wolverine totally doesn’t belong beside your Disney collection?
10. Cutting Back On Time Online
Below we’ll talk more at length about the time compromises that come with living with a partner, but millennial men in particular specified that they needed to cut back on time spent online. With technology making it so easy to always be connected to the Internet, you can understand why it’s easy for your partner to start playing second fiddle. But you know what feels even better than that buzz from a new notification? Your loving girlfriend who is not giving you the cold shoulder for the rest of the night.
There is nothing wrong with you and your partner spending time together, but if that time is spent with both of you looking at your phones, it might be a sign that you need to start making a bit more effort to break the chains of the Internet. Sure, you think that cute cat photo that you found on the internet is going to prevent a fight, but to be safe you better have some puppies as a backup!
9. Excess Of Grooming Products
Have you ever gone to your partner’s house and wondered how on earth she ever manages to take a shower with all those products that litter the shelves? Not to mention how she gets ready for a full day of work when it looks like she’s got 100 different grooming products all over the place.
We all know you love how gorgeous she looks when it’s all said and done, but for the baby boomer generation, the excess of products was one of their top turn offs. 24% of men in a general sense listed grooming products as being their top turn off, whereas only 8% of women shared that complaint.
8. What If She’s Dirty?
We know where your head is going, but get it out of the gutter and realize that moving into a house with a person with terrible cleaning habits could be brutal. A sink full of dishes and dirty laundry both hit the top 5 list for men when it came to turn-offs.
It can definitely be hard to keep your clothing organized, after all, your wardrobe size literally just doubled (at the very least), but it’s definitely something that is worth keeping track of, because hey, clean clothes can be pretty awesome.
Dishes are also perhaps not your favorite chore to do in the world, but it’s really one that just gets worse the longer you leave it. Have some open communication about it, and if your partner knows it is something that turns you off, perhaps they’ll make a more active effort to be on top of it, and that can be a huge sign of how much she cares.
7. Her Sleep Patterns
Sleeping together (in a non-dirty way) is definitely something that becomes a much bigger part of your relationship once you start living together. You love your partner, but if they’re always asleep by 10pm, and up by 5am and you’re always asleep by 2am but up by 11am, that’s probably going to cause some significant strains in your relationship. She tells you all the time on the phone that she snores, sure you hear her complaints, but now you’re living together and good luck falling asleep if your partner sounds like Chewbacca eating Trail Mix.
Not to mention who can forget the episode of Friends where Ross instructs Chandler on trying to cuddle Janice to sleep, but still roll his way to freedom, because sleeping in a cuddle, while nice, is not always the most practical.
6. You May Disagree More
There are definitely a lot of positives to being able to talk to your partner on a more frequent basis, but that can also come with it some silly disagreements. Living with someone means you see your partner through all the different emotions of a day. Are they stressed for a few minutes? Not something they can just not mention through a text if you’re right there to potentially get the brunt of it.
Now, this definitely goes both ways, and is by no means exclusive to females, but we’d be lying if seeing our partner in their less positive moments is something that is easy. You may also find yourself getting a lot more annoyed at little traits that you once found endearing in a partner, but become overkill when you’re with them 24/7.
5. Cutting Back On Your Own Interests
Now don’t get me wrong buddy, I know it’s super impressive that you can get through 6 hours of Call of Duty and hardly have to get up to pee. But you know who probably isn’t going to appreciate that? Your girlfriend, who has been shooting you death glares for the past 4 hours.
You’ve just been too preoccupied to notice. You definitely need to hope your partner doesn’t completely diminish your own personal interests, but the reality is that living with your partner is going to lead to a heck of a lot less time by yourself.
Is that a bad thing? No, but it’s definitely something you need to be aware of. Sure, you know your partner has a raid in World of Warcraft every Monday, but did you realize the extent of that hobby prior to living together?
4. Pictures Of Exes
Imagine how awkward of a situation this would be. You’ve just moved into your girlfriend’s place and you two are chilling out on the couch, perhaps catching up on some Game of Thrones. Then out of the corner of your eye, you catch a picture of your girlfriend cuddling up with her former MMA fighter of a boyfriend from when they were in Maui.
Probably not the best foreplay in the world! Men listed pictures of exes as being one of their top 5 turn-offs when they were asked. You can imagine things go from bad to worse when the photos they stumble upon are of a naughty nature! If it’s any consolation, women rated pictures of exes as being an even higher turn-off, so you just have to hope you two stay on even playing ground!
3. Hair Everywhere
Hey there girl, putting your hair in the air and waving it like you just don’t care may be fun, but it also may be a quick way to turn off any partner that you are living with. Men rated hair everywhere as being their 4th highest turn-off. While you honestly just need to accept that it’s the price you must pay if you like a girl with long hair, it’s definitely still not fun to find hair everywhere!
2. Her Cooking
It was reported that 77% of women do more of the cooking in a relationship, so holy smokes do we hope that you’re with someone whose food you love! If not, one of the biggest signs to go for the door may be the realization that life with your partner means a life of trying to struggle through some pretty awful meals. Now there are always solutions to this. You know, like making your own food. But the point remains nevertheless.
On a similar thought process, perhaps you guys also have a completely different idea on what types of foods you like to have on a regular basis. Grocery shopping not only would become increasingly more expensive as you struggle to balance both diets, but a fun activity that can lead to a lot of bonding is falling by the wayside.
1. “Girl Nights” And Her Friends
Guys definitely have the ability to have annoying friends too, but hell hath no fury like a best friend of your girlfriend who you have rubbed the wrong way. Especially if one of the main hangout areas for her and your partner is your now co-habited living space.
Unwanted friends or excess roommates can quickly make you feel like a guest in your own home. On a bigger scale, while not everyone’s girlfriend is going to be the type to host “girl nights,” if you’re a man that is dating someone who is, you definitely know what they are. You can be prepared to vacate the house as you give way to a night of gossip, wine, and romantic comedies.