As a wise man once said, once you see certain things, you can’t unsee them. As you read through this list of things that you shouldn’t google under any circumstances, you’re going to become really tempted to google them. It’s just how it goes. If someone tells you not to do something, then you’re going to do it, but I’m going to plead with you anyway: don’t do it. There are certain things that you don’t want to google under any circumstances. These are things that are too awful, so horrible that not only are they going to make you totally sick but they might stay with you for a very long time.
Of course, some of you are totally hardcore, and nothing on this list will bother you, but you guys are probably the same people who like hardcore horror movies and check out gore sites all the time. In other words, you’re weirdos. So, if you’re a weirdo — and no judgment here — go ahead and google away.
Some of these things, you shouldn’t google because they’re kind of lame, others, you shouldn’t google because they’re totally gross, and some of them you shouldn’t google because they’re so horrible, they’ll keep you up for weeks.
Here are 15 Things You Should Never Google Unless You Want to Be Sick:
15. Body Farm
A body farm is pretty much exactly what it sounds like, which is why you pretty much never ever want to google it. Okay, I guess it’s not really just like a real farm. A real farm is where things grow, while a body farm is where bodies decompose as they’re being studied by scientists. There are 7 body farms in the United States. The aim of a body farm is to gain a better understanding of how a body decomposes, which helps people understand information such as the timing and circumstances of death from human remains. So, in other words, they leave bodies outside and let them rot, so they can understand better how long someone has been dead in an investigation. If you think this sounds nasty, just google it. Actually, don’t do that.
14. 2 Girls 1 Cup
Many of you may have heard of 2 Girls and 1 Cup but have never checked it out because you don’t want to be disgusted. Many of you may have never heard of it at all. And then, of course, there are those of you who knew what it was and checked it out anyway and probably instantly regretted it. This is a video of two girls who are, in theory, doing something sexual, but in reality, what they’re doing is just plain old nasty. I can’t even describe it on this type of site other than to say that it does, in fact, involve two girls and a cup and to say that you really shouldn’t check it out under any circumstances. Unless, of course, you’re into that type of thing, and if that’s the case, then knock yourself out, you oddball.
13. Nikki Catsouras
Back in 2006, a woman named Nikki Catsouras died in a car accident when she was 18 years old in Lake Forest, California. She had been driving her dad’s car when she lost control of it and hit a toll booth. The scene was so horrific that her parents weren’t asked to identify the body, but a couple of cops sent a few photographs of it to friends, and it soon hit the Internet. Her parents have tried to get them removed, but they’re still out there. I bet, at this point, you’re thinking about putting her name into Google, but I would suggest not doing so. I would imagine you’ve never seen anything quite like it, and as I’ve said before, once you see it, you can’t unsee it. Google this at your own risk.
12. Lamprey Disease
There are good news and bad news about Lamprey disease. The good news is that the whole thing is a hoax and there’s no such thing. The bad news is that it’s still pretty gross anyway. Lamprey disease started as a joke that was spread by email a few years ago but then went viral again recently. Basically, the gag consists of taking the mouth of the lamprey and photoshopping it onto a human body part. Yeah, I get that maybe it doesn’t sound all that bad, but you have to actually google it to see how incredibly messed up it actually looks. But see the thing is, you probably shouldn’t google it, even if you know it’s a hoax; the whole thing is still kind of nasty and might give you nightmares.
11. Lemon Party
If you’ve never heard of Lemon Party, then you really should be very thankful. It’s one of the best-known gross-out videos ever; in fact, it even got referenced one time on an episode of 30 Rock — that’s how famous the whole thing is. It’s mostly because the name sounds so innocent — a lemon party? Man, how fun is that, right? Sounds like something that couldn’t harm a fly to check out. Not so fast — the video features a bunch of old guys in bed doing things that I can pretty much tell you for certain that you don’t want to see, and when I say that, I’m not joking around. I can see you already thinking about googling it and seeing where it leads you, but I’m warning you that you might regret it. Unless you’re a weirdo, of course.
Yeah, honestly, don’t look this one up, no matter what you do. Now, if you happen to have elephantiasis and are reading this article, I apologize, but if you don’t have it, you probably don’t want to know what it looks like, and when I say “probably,” I mean you don’t, for certain. Elephantiasis is when parts of the body, which could mean anything from your leg to your feet, to your face, swells to massive proportions. This is the kind of thing that looks even worse than it actually sounds on paper, so if you don’t believe me, knock yourself out and take a look, or you could just watch The Elephant Man, which is a movie based on the true story of a man who had this disease and who performed in a freak show.
9. 1 Lunatic 1 Icepick
This is one that you really don’t want to check out. It’s so awful, I really cannot even describe what happened in detail, but the main point is that a psycho named Luka Magnotta killed another man with an ice pick and then did horrible things to the body while videotaping it, and then, that video was posted on a site called Bestgore.com. Magnotta was eventually arrested for the murder and is now in prison. This is one of most disgusting things you will ever see in your life, and in fact, for most normal people, it will be the most disgusting thing that they will ever see in their lives. Do yourself a favor, and do not look this video up on Google. It isn’t worth it, and you won’t be in a good place for a long time afterward.
Alright, so this one is incredibly nasty. I mean, I just looked it up for research, and I really, really wish that I hadn’t. If you google the basketball player Evan Fournier, make sure that you put in his full name, because if you just type in the word “Fournier,” then you might wind up seeing Fournier’s gangrene, which is a type of gangrene that affects the perineum, which is the area between the anus and the scrotum or the vulva. Now, I know that’s already way more than you want to know, so why would you want to see what it looks like? I’m telling you right now that you wouldn’t. Fournier’s gangrene is one of, if not the most, nasty thing that you could ever imagine seeing in your entire life. Don’t google it; just don’t do it.
Some people think of a jigger as a measuring device used to pour alcohol, and if you’re smart, you’ll just keep thinking of them in that way as well. That’s because there’s another kind of jigger, one that you probably don’t want to google, and when I say “probably,” I know that you’re not going to want to. Jiggers are also knowns as chigoe fleas; they’re basically sand fleas that are found in sub-Saharan climates and burrow into the skin and lay eggs. Yeah, you heard me. I said they burrow under the skin. This can cause swelling, itching, and infection. Sometimes, amputations need to be done, and occasionally, people even die. But explaining it is nothing compared to what it actually looks like. Don’t google this! Seriously, just don’t.
6. Gabriel Kuhn
If you google Gabriel Kuhn, you’re likely to see some of the most horrific photos that you’ve ever seen in your entire life. This story has to do with 12-year-old Gabriel, and his 16-year-old friend, Daniel Petry, who got in a fight over something to do with an MMORPG game that they were playing. Daniel got so mad about what Gabriel did that he ended up strangling him to death. That sounds bad enough but not so bad as what happened next. Daniel wanted to hide the body, so he used a hacksaw to cut off Gabriel’s legs. This was about when Gabriel’s mother came home and got to see something that no one should ever see, and that includes you. If you google these images, be warned: they’re just incredibly awful.
5. Brown Recluse Spider Bite
I’m telling you right now — you really don’t want to see what this looks like. A brown recluse spider bite is not usually noticed right away because they’re painless. In fact, maybe you were bitten by one just a little while ago, and you have no idea. Let’s hope not because the result of these bites can be as nasty as anything that you can possibly imagine. If you google this on image search, you’ll see a variety of spider bites, ranging from those that look incredibly painful to those that are literally the stuff of nightmares. I would highly suggest that you pass on seeing what this actually looks like unless you’re curious. But of course, curiosity killed the cat, just like some spider bites could kill you, too.
4. Skin Condition
You might think that just googling the terms “skin condition” is not really all that scary, but if you were to think that, then you most certainly would be wrong. If you’re foolish enough to type those two words into google image search, then your mind is going to be totally blown, and it’s going to be blown in a way that’s going to make you pretty sick. There are as many skin conditions as there are colors in the rainbow; you can just scroll for hours seeing all of the horrible things that can happen to you when you have a skin condition. But listen to me here, and listen closely: just because you can google such things, that definitely doesn’t mean that you should do it. So, just say no to googling skin conditions.
3. Mucus Plug
When you think of the two words “mucus plug” together, there really doesn’t seem to be much of a reason to Google them. Ever hear of the expression “Curiosity killed the cat”? Well, I think that they might have had mucus plugs in mind when they came up with that expression. Let’s just say that the mucus plug has something to do with women and with pregnancy. Trust me when I say that’s really all that you need to know; you really don’t need to know anything more than that. Just leave it alone. I can tell that you aren’t convinced and that you’re thinking of looking it up. Well, if you do, don’t say that I didn’t warn you. Here I am trying to keep you safe, and there you go googling mucus plugs.
2. R. Budd Dwyer
Dwyer was a state treasurer who was convicted of a minor crime. At a press conference, he went on and on about his conviction and how wrong it was and then pulled a gun out of a manila envelope. He then asked people to leave if seeing what they were about to see would bother them, and finally, he shot himself in the mouth and died immediately. His press conference was being televised live, and one can still easily find photos and videos of Dwyer killing himself on live television. I know this might be tempting to look up on Google. If I was to tell the truth, I would say that I’ve done it myself, but I don’t recommend doing it under any circumstances. It really is shocking, but it’s even sadder.
1. Calculus Bridge
Here’s another thing that you really just don’t want to google. You might think I’m talking about a bridge over the water, but what I’m really talking about is plaque buildup. And not just any sort of plaque buildup, mind you. Once again, this puts me in a bit of a bad spot here. I want to explain what’s so bad about what you might see when you google this term, but I can’t really do so without being totally disgusting. So, you kind of actually have to google it to find out what I’m talking about, and to do so would be totally nasty. This is what’s commonly known as a “Catch-22.” You’re sort of damned if you do and damned if you don’t. So, go ahead if you really need to. Just don’t say that I didn’t warn you.
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