Ryan Lochte just got caught lying. If his lying isn’t bad enough, he also is really bad at it, which is even worse.
One of the first things we are told as children is that we should not lie. It is looked as a sign of moral weakness, and really one of the worst things that you could possibly do as a human being. Who would want to be thought of as a liar? No one. With that said though, just about all of us have lied numerous times, and almost all of us have been caught doing so. It is something though that, unless you are some sort of sociopath, most of us try not to do.
But here is the thing, though. If you do lie, and I certainly hope you do not, for God’s sake at least be halfway good at it. And also, if you are going to lie, try to do it in a way that does not become international news and not get on a list like this one. Like for example, the other day I told my girlfriend that I never flirt when I go out with my friends. And actually I do. All the time, actually. Was that lame of me to lie? Yes, very much so. If I got caught was I going to wind up leading off the nightly news? Nope. So I’ve got that going for me. Anyway, let’s check out Ryan Lochte and 14 Other Athletes That Got Busted For Lying.
15. Josh Shaw – Lied About Jumping Off Balcony To Save Child
Just for fun, let’s just say you are a famous football player who just injured both of his ankles because you just jumped off a balcony because your girlfriend screamed when you broke into her apartment. What would you do? If you answered “Pretend that I injured my ankles jumping off a balcony to save my nephew from drowning in a pool” then you win. USC cornerback Josh Shaw even said he would “do it again for whatever kid it was.” What a hero! No, actually he’s a dummy. When the police reports came out it became apparent that Shaw made the whole thing up. He now plays for the Bengals, who obviously don’t care a whole lot about employing liars who break into women’s apartments, as long as they can cover.
14. Tim Johnson – Told Players He Fought In Vietnam
Tim Johnson used to be the manager of the Blue Jays. He was thought of as a great motivator. One of the ways he would get his guys all worked up was to tell them stories of his time in the Vietnam War. At one point Roger Clemens decided to buy Johnson a motorcycle helmet with his combat logo symbol on it. Clemens called Johnson’s wife for the details. Johnson obviously had not clued in his wife to his big fat lie, because she told Clemens he never had been in Vietnam. One place Johnson now can say he has been is Mexico, because that is where he ended up managing for years after being fired. Once his team found out they were playing for a liar, and a bad one at that, his time was pretty much up. Hey Tim, looks like players don’t want to play for a lying weasel. Who knew?
13. George O’Leary – Fake Resume
George O’Leary must have been super-excited when he got his dream job as the head coach of Notre Dame. The only problem is that when you get good jobs, people start to pay attention to you a bit more. He had claimed he had quite the football career at the University of New Hampshire, and that he had a master’s degree from NYU, but as it turns out “former coaches and players at the University of New Hampshire could not remember O’Leary playing there, even though biographical information in various media guides at teams he later coached claimed he had earned varsity letters there from 1966 to 1968.” The New York Times reported, “when Notre Dame officials contacted O’Leary, he admitted the inaccuracies first about his playing career, then about the master’s degree.” It always is a bit easier to admit something when you are caught I suppose.
12. 2000 Spanish Paralympic Basketball Team – Faked Disability
These guys are without a doubt the biggest idiots on this list. While everyone else lied for money, fame, a true athletic accomplishment, or simply to try and impress people, these guys pretended to be either mentally ill or mentally deficient so they could win an award at the Paralympics. Yes, you read that correctly. They pretended to be mentally disabled, so that they could beat people who truly were mentally disabled and steal their medal. At one point the coach said “Lads, move down a gear or they’ll figure out you’re not disabled” to the team. They were eventually outed, and when they were I hope that they were all taken into an alley and thrashed thoroughly. Seriously? What a bunch of absolute clowns.
11. Rosie Ruiz – Rode Subway During Marathon
You simply can’t have a list like this without having Rosie Ruiz on it. Back in the old days, way back in 1980, there wasn’t all sorts of constant coverage of sporting events like marathons, or things like social media to keep track of every single second of marathons. Which is how Rosie Ruiz lied and faked her way into winning the 198o version of the Boston Marathon. She was declared the winner but was stripped of the championship eight days later? Why? Oh, because she did not actually run the whole race. She took the subway to a spot a few miles before the finish line and then ran the rest of the way as the “winner.” Really? Who does things like this? And worse, who actually thinks they can get away with things like this?
10. James Hogue – Track And Con
James Hogue was a really good runner. He still owns two state records, for the one mile and the two mile, in track in his home state of Kansas. The only thing that he was better at than running was being a con man. He had been incarcerated for some minor thefts a few times and was close to 30-years-old when he got into Princeton, which is one of the best universities in the country, as a man named Alexis Santana, which was a name he made up. He joined the track team and did really well, even though he was well older than anyone else he was competing against. He was finally busted and kicked out of school and charged with a crime for defrauding the school out of financial aid. He was last heard of when he was arrested in Utah where the police found close to 7000 items that he had stolen from homes while working as a repairman.
9. Manti Te’o – Girlfriend Hoax
Yes, Manti was the victim of a very bizarre Catfishing scheme, and yes, we should feel kind of badly for him about that. But the thing is, he lied about the whole thing too. This odd story would take too long to explain here, but it can be summed up by saying that some dude was pretending to be a chick that Manti fell in love with over the phone. At one point the Catfisher got freaked out and told Manti that his “fake girlfriend” had died. Then at some point Manti found out it was a hoax, but for some bizarre reason still continued to speak about his former “girlfriend” in interviews, and how sad he was that she passed away. Confused? So am I, but I don’t know what I’m more confused about, how weird these guys are, or how bad they are at lying.
8. Danny Almonte – Faked His Age
In the 2001 Little League World Series Danny Almonte seemed like a man among boys. Well not quite but he did seem way more developed than the rest of the kids he was playing with. For one thing he was bigger than the rest, and for another he was throwing 76 miles an hour, which at that mound distance in little league was like him throwing a 100 mile an hour heater in the majors. He even threw a perfect game and soon became a media sensation. Then later he became more of a media joke when it came to light that he was actually two-years older than he should have been. You have to feel a little bad for him, as he was just a kid, but still, come on. Once he started playing against kids his age his baseball career went nowhere.
7. Ali Dia – The Fake Soccer Player
Someone claiming to be George Weah, who is a legend in African soccer, once called a coach and suggestee he sign Ali Dia, who supposedly was an amazing soccer player from Liberia. Well, Dia was an awful soccer player, and was probably the one who pretended to be Weah as well. He only lasted one game. Here is the report of the player he subbed in for who said: “His performance was almost comical. He kind of took my place, but he didn’t really have a position. He was just wandering everywhere. I don’t think he realized what position he was supposed to be in. I don’t even know if he spoke English – I don’t think I ever said a word to him. In the end he got himself subbed because he was that bad.”
6. Marion Jones – Lied About PED Use
Marion Jones was an Olympic hero that won three gold medals in the 2000 Olympic Games. That is the good news. The bad news is that she won by using PEDs and then lied about it to a BALCO agent. She still does not really seem to get it according to this article in which she is quoted as saying “I made a decision that took less than 45, 30 seconds,” she said, snapping her fingers, “to lie, to lie to them. And that was my crime.” Right Marion, that was your crime. We get that it stinks, but it actually was a crime. She went to jail for a whole six months for being dumb enough to lie to an agent, and also for being horrifically bad at it. Oh yeah, she was also stripped of her medals when her cheating and lying were exposed.
5. Kevin Hart – The Fake Recruit
While some of these athletes are quite famous for being really good athletes who lied, there are others on this list who are just okay athletes that told really enormous lies. Kevin Hart is one of the latter group. He held a big pep rally with news crews present to announce that he had signed to play football with the University of California. Check this video of the rally, the whole thing is pretty amazing. The only thing that stinks is that he made the whole up. The University of California never even recruited him. Oh well, Kevin at least got to have a super-fun pep rally where he got to act like a big deal, hopefully that made up for the lifetime of embarrassment that will keep coming back every time an article like this is written.
4. Rafael Palmeiro – Lied To Congress About PED Use
Good old Rafael. You actually have to give him some credit. When being questioned by Congress about his steroid use he went with the whole “the best defense is a good offense” thing, which sometimes works. It is often used when wives accuse husbands of cheating on them, but usually does not work when you are being questioned by Congress. He pointed his fingers at members of Congress and acted so totally hurt and put upon that anyone could even suggest that he may have used steroids. He, of course, later was found guilty of using steroids. Surprise! Well, if there is one thing that we know for sure, steroids may have made him a better baseball player but he did that whole lying thing all by himself without any artificial enhancements.
3. Pete Rose – Lied About Betting On Baseball
Of course, we need to put some people on this list that truly are at the very tops at the whole liar business, and one of them has to be Pete Rose. For those of you that are not aware, Rose was one of the very best baseball players ever, and was a heck of a manager, too. He truly lived and breathed baseball, so much so that he also used to bet on it as well. This is kind of a no-no, you know- the whole “integrity of the game” thing and all. Rose was suspended for his gambling on baseball and for years said that he never did it, he never bet, and “Oh how horrible this whole thing was.” Then a few years ago he came out and said that he did bet on baseball after all. Good job Pete, thanks for being honest, now stop asking to get in the Hall of Fame.
2. Lance Armstrong – Lied About PED Use
Lance Armstrong is probably the most well-known sports hero ever. Mostly because he was such a hero. He won seven Tour de France victories and inspired so many people with his “Livestrong” message. The guy beat cancer, and he was the best cyclist in the world. Everyone loved Lance. Which is why it was so bad when he admitted not only to cheating in all of his victories, but that he lied about it for so long, too. This was sort of the equivalent of being at home cooking dinner with your three little kids in the suburbs and having your husband come home and tell you that he has been banging the nanny for the past two years and he is leaving you. Lance, why did you have to do us like this? You were once a hero, now you are on a liars list.
1. Ryan Lochte – Worst Liar Ever
Let’s get one thing out of the way right now. Ryan Lochte totally looks like a jerk. There, I said it. So as we all know Lochte told Brazilian police that he and teammates Gunnar Bentz, Jack Conger and James Feigen had been robbed at a gas station by a guy with a gun. Well, that is kind of close, but it seems what really happened is that Lochte and his pals got hammered and trashed a gas station bathroom. The “robbery” happened when they dealt with a security guard. Lochte recently had this to say “I over-exaggerated that story. And if I had never done that, we wouldn’t be in this mess … None of this would have happened. And it was my immature behavior.” Well, yeah Ryan, you are a liar and you got caught and this is what happens. Kids, always tell the truth, and stay in school.