Every brand has a logo. McDonald’s has its golden arches, Nike has the swoosh, and NBC has the peacock. Many brands also have mascots, like Bud Light’s Spuds MacKenzie and Tony the Tiger from Frosted Flakes. Brand mascots always have some kitsch value, like Mr. Clean’s bald head, earring and bulging muscles, and KFC’s The Colonel’s white suit and Kentucky accent.
When you think of brand mascots, mainly men come to mind. There’s the Jolly Green Giant, the Brawny paper towel man, and the Quaker from Quaker Oats. Even animated mascots tend to be men, like the Kool-Aid guy, the Pillsbury boy, and the Michelin man. This might seem sexist, but it makes sense if you know your advertising history. Women are the largest consumers, and therefore brands try to appeal to females. Brands are often hesitant to put a female on packaging because they are afraid that women won’t respond well to other women – especially if the mascot is thinner or prettier. But there’s an exception to every rule. Companies want to find a niche for themselves, and therefore there are products that have female mascots. And when advertisers draw women, they do it right! No curve is lost, no curl is out of place, and no bosom isn’t bountiful. This list is dedicated to ranking the hottest women on brand packaging known to man. In most cases, these ladies are some of the first that turned men on, giving them a special place in our hearts. Read on to see if your favorites made the cut, and who the surprises might be.
15. Sun-Maid Girl
You grew up eating Sun-Maid Raisins, and as you got older you came to the realization that the Sun-Maid girl is hot. While the raisins have stayed the same, her look has evolved over the years to match changing tastes. But she always looks good enough to eat. There’s something about her bonnet and wholesome, almost Anne Hathaway good looks, that appeals to everyone. And who doesn’t like a girl holding a tray of food? She was based on a real girl when the company got its start in the 1900s. Now, she’s so popular that she has her own Facebook page.
14. Columbia Pictures Lady
The Columbia Pictures Lady is just as famous as the movies the studio produces, but her history is muddled at best. The lady wearing a toga and carrying a torch has been the logo for Columbia Pictures since 1924, although she underwent many updates. She began as a Roman soldier holding a stick and shield, then was featured in the early 1930s with a dark bob and headdress a la Cleopatra with the American flag draped over her middle. By the late 1930s, her image was updated and looks closer to what we see today: an ethereal beauty with hair swept away from her face and with billowing clouds in the background. Many actresses have taken credit for inspiring her looks, from studio extras to little known models to Annette Benning.
Starbucks is overpriced and its coffee is bitter. So why keep coming back? Because their trademark, the lovely mermaid, is so stunning. Her name is Siren because she is so mysterious, according to the Starbucks website, anyway. She is based on a 16th century woodcut of a Norse-styled mermaid, and is considered by the company to be a storyteller – one that will inspire them to push forward. We’re not sure about all that rhetoric, but she is hot and worthy of fantasizing about. Her hair flows over her bare chest, and her fins are splayed in a most inviting way. The smile she wears underneath her crown is Mona Lisa-esque, and who could resist?
12. M&M Green
M&M Green is the hottest M&M of them all. And we’re pretty sure she’ll melt in your mouth, and not in your hand. Maybe it’s her luscious lips, or maybe it’s her tall, white boots, but this girl sizzles. Adding to her aura is the fact that she’s green, because we all know the urban legend that green M&Ms are an aphrodisiac. The M&M company clearly plays this up, as it has a page devoted to Green’s likes and dislikes which is similar to the format of a Playboy Playmate’s turn-ons and turn-offs. Green likes candlelit dinners in Paris, and her dislikes include people who stare.
11. Chiquita Banana Woman
In 1944, the United Fruit Company copied Carmen Miranda’s look for their new mascot, Miss Chiquita Banana. Miranda was a popular Brazilian entertainer who successfully crossed over in the American media; she was known for her tutti-frutti hat. Miranda made your grandfather’s pulse pound, and Chiquita is still making men’s hearts thump all these years later. Chiquita started as a banana with human arms and legs, then became a banana sticker as a yellow line drawing with a blue background, and is now a fully animated Latina. Chiquita has always been seductive with her swaying hips, sultry singing voice, and frilly dresses.
10. Blue Bonnet
The Blue Bonnet Margarine Girl is an icon. Her girl next door looks have a devoted following. Her blonde hair, blue eyes, and pretty blue bonnet just feel like home. She’s a natural beauty that takes men back to an era before video games, when mom made homemade cookies and dad read the newspaper. She’s the kind of girl you want to marry. Who cares if margarine has now been found to be worse than butter for you? She’s worth it. The Blue Bonnet Girl is so popular that even the term “Blue Bonnet” is synonymous with “butterface.” Although we don’t think she could ever be called one.
9. Aunt Jemima and Mrs. Butterworth
Are you on team Aunt Jemima or team Mrs. Butterworth? It’s hard to pick a side because both women are so sweet and tasty – just like their syrup. Aunt Jemima is warm and cuddly, with her happy smile and pearl earrings. Mrs. Butterworth is older and more demure, but her pulled back hair and apron seem to somehow do the trick. Either way, both women are like pancakes: they exude softness and comfort. What is more attractive than that? They might not be the hottest on the list, but we bet they’d make great wives and even better cooks.
8. Argo Corn Starch Maiden
Isn’t it interesting how men’s fantasies are often rooted in their childhoods? A perfect case in point is the Argo Corn Starch Maiden. Most men probably don’t have this corn starch in their pantry, but they did grow up with it – and vividly recall ogling her. And why not? She’s all woman… aside from her torso which is a glistening cob of corn. She’s a beautiful Native American, with long black hair and rosy red cheeks. She is draped in a cape of emerald green, and has a headband accented with feathers. Sadly, she was eliminated by the label in recent years. Men can still admire the Clabber Girl, though.
7. Chicken of the Sea Mermaid
The Chicken of the Sea Mermaid was debuted back in 1952. She is another brand mascot that has undergone updates, but the original in still the most alluring. She had blonde hair that covered one eye and flowed down to her bottom, and she held a scepter that let you know she worked hard and played hard. Her scales were emerald green and were adorned with jewels. And her face! She had Barbie doll good looks, with pouty lips and a pointed nose. Her real name is Catalina, and she has moved away from her s*x symbol persona and now has a coupon club and makes charitable donations.
6. Dolly Madison
Nowadays ice cream brands are all about the crème de la crème. But when tastes were simpler, Dolly Madison ice cream was a staple in freezers. It was named after President Madison’s real wife, Dolly Madison, who served ice cream at her husband’s first inauguration. She was a beauty as First Lady, and the brand captured her good looks on its packaging. While the ice cream boxes featured a stylized silhouette of Dolly, advertisements allowed readers to bask in her old fashioned prettiness. She had a pre-Victorian era style, with her hair piled on top of her head and wore low-cut dresses. Women still emulate this look today, albeit in a modernized way.
5. Rosie the Riveter
Rosie the Riveter paved the way for women’s rights, but men mostly enjoy her for her sensible good looks. In a time when women were seen only in dresses, Rosie broke down barriers while telling the world, “We can do it!” She debuted a different style of woman, one that had muscles and a no-nonsense personality. Still, she made sure to have her hair styled and her lips painted red. Fans were also attracted to her skills, as she could rise to the occasion when times got tough and get to work – be it in a shipyard, factory or just managing things on the home front.
4. Rosarita Woman
The Rosarita woman is a spicy Mexican lady with picturesque good looks. She was first designed by one of the owner’s sons, who was seeking to draw a woman as good looking as the food. He met his goal as the woman has flawless skin, endless black eyes and a perfect smile. She is styled in traditional Mexican garb, wearing a sombrero, gold hoop earrings and has a flower in her hair. Looking at her makes the consumer want to pass up other Latino brands like Goya, and buy some Rosarita beans. Beans suddenly just got a lot more sexy.
The Esurance girl’s real name is Erin. She was a secret agent who was drawn like a hot superhero, and her goal was to find customers the best deals on insurance. Erin was so popular that mega-fans began creating their own memes of her, often depicting her in …adult situations. Her stardom started to overshadow Esurance, and the company wasn’t thrilled about her unsanctioned exploits, so she was eventually retired. But this pink-haired, curvaceous daredevil isn’t down and out. She has a life of her own on the Internet, posing for cheesecake pics, fighting crime, and “teasing” men and women.
2. Land O’Lakes Indian Maiden
The Land O’Lakes Indian Maiden is every man’s taste. Her picture is legendary. She is kneeling in a come-hither pose, and has beautiful features including tanned skin, bright eyes, and a gleaming mouth. And her double braids mean that she’s single! Her outfit is cute, as the beading and fringe accentuate her natural curves. She has a dedicated following online, including several how-to’s instructing her male fans on folding the butter box so that her bosom is revealed. Like any beauty, she has her critics. Some feel like she is feeding into a stereotypical view of Native American culture, while others take issue with the fact that she is locked in a fridge, painted on a box, holding a picture of herself painted on a box.
1. St. Pauli Girl
The St. Pauli Girl is hands-down the most beautiful, most iconic, most admired brand mascot ever. She has inspired legions of men to drink her beer, and legions of women to copy her look. Her natural blonde hair and friendly demeanor strike a chord with everyone. Adding to her appeal is her traditional German clothing. Her low cut blouse and bodice will never go out of style. And the fact that she is holding a bunch of beer steins which she is eager to serve you makes her seem fun-loving and easy-going. The St. Pauli Girl is even embodied in the flesh, as the company picks a new spokesmodel each year.