We have said it before and we will say it again: the Internet is a wonderful place. But it can also be a hilariously dark one. Although we value the priceless amounts of information that lies at our fingertips, secretly, what we really get a kick out of is some of the bizarre stuff that you can find. Some of it may be serious, but the majority is probably people looking for attention. Just look at Yahoo Answers.
Places like Yahoo Answers are designed to give people a place to ask a question and (hopefully) get some expert advice on how to solve their issue. Sometimes it works, but other times, well let’s just say the trolls come out in full force. Here is a look at some of the most bizarre and head scratching questions to have been asked on Yahoo Answers by seemingly normal people, who might just have some Internet troll embedded in their DNA.
13. How Do I Successfully Become A Justin Bieber Fan?
Okay, so this one was probably meant to be a joke. But given the high level of intensity some of the Biebs fans have, it is quite possible that some tween really needed to know this. Especially if all their friends are already fans and they have yet to catch some Bieber fever. Of course we would never recommend the suggestions given here, which include losing all brain functions or getting a pretty substantial blow to the head. No matter how hot the artist is, nothing is worth injuring yourself, despite what their fans say to you on Twitter.
12. How Do You Get YouTube To Come Film You?
We suppose everyone deserves a chance to be YouTube famous. But if you truly don’t know how to do it, then you really don’t deserve it, do you? This one is actually based on a longer question that was posted earlier, however the poster probably didn’t like what they heard, and took it down. Thank heavens for copycats, or else we might have never seen this gem of a question on Yahoo. Too bad though, the responses were probably worth a look.
11. How Was The Routine Of Milking Cows For Milk Discovered?
You know you have thought about it from time to time; at least someone finally decided to ask. After all, how did someone decide to one day go up to a cow and squeeze the udder for milk? Were there no other sources of liquid in sight? We know it’s kept us up at night here. More than likely it was probably done on a dare. You know, two guys were walking around, tending the cows, when one says to the other, “Hey, you know what you should do?” The rest of course is history. But then again, we’ll probably never really find out.
10. What Do Prostitutes Wear During Winter?
One would think that hookers do what the rest of us do and bundle up, but maybe this particular poster hasn’t taken the time to notice. But then again, as the poster mentioned, how on earth would a bundled up prostitute look all “prostitutey” if they were in a large jacket and protective leggings? It probably does defeat the purpose of trying to look alluring if you cannot show off the goods. Like the cow question from number 13, this one is probably gonna keep us up at night for a long, long time. Okay, maybe for just a week.
9. How Does A Blind Person Know When To Stop Wiping After A Bowel Movement?
Apparently no one knows at Randy G.’s work, so they decided to go out and ask the world. While we don’t have an answer for good ol’ Randy, we can only imagine that this was the work of someone who was bored one day and just decided to ask whatever came into their mind, hoping to get a rise out of some internet junkies. If this was an honest and sincere inquiry, then we have no words for this. Luckily, it didn’t look as if anyone replied, showing that most people can spot a troll when they see one.
8. What Does The Bible Say About Husbands & Wives Having Homosexual Relations With Each Other?
We are going to go out on a limb here and say that it probably doesn’t mention anything about it, since the word homosexual was not used until sometime in the late 1800’s. Politics aside, we are guessing this particular poster doesn’t own a Bible (or even a dictionary) anyways, or else they would have been able to solve this dilemma themselves. Hopefully someone clued her in, but we are pretty sure she still had to take time and “mullet” it over. In case you didn’t notice, the word mullet is part of her username, so the joke works. At least we hope it does.
7. Should Large Women Be Forced To Pay More For Entry To Nightclubs & Concerts?
Wow, the question is bad enough, but the reasoning for it is even worse. P. Gill, the author of the question, feels that since curvaceous beauties take up more room on the dance floor and that they require a buffer zone, they need to pony up some more cash. Again, this is probably from a troll, but you never really know. They could just be a regular you-know-what who thinks they are God’s gift to women, and they truly believe that full-sized women should pay more. We weep for humanity the more we think about that possibility.
6. Can I Tell By The Smell Of My Husband’s Gas If He Has Been Cheating?
Well, we are going to say no, because if the gas is as bad as this poster says it is, no one would want to be alone in a room this guy. Especially in a small motel room for a late-night tryst. It just would not make sense at all. Unless of course, he was rich, then maybe someone might try to tough out the smell for the riches. Or he could possibly just be saving it for home. But other than that, we stand by the no.
5. How Can I Convince My Wife To Let Our Hot Maid Sleep Between Us At Night? Please HELP?
Well Paul R., looks like you have asked the question of the century. Even if you meant it as a joke, we can just bet that some husbands were sitting at their keyboards refreshing the page over and over again, hoping that someone would give them the magic formula to getting their wives to go along with their fantasy. One thing is for sure, if this question got answered, and the poor schlub gave it a try, the only reasonable response from his wife would have been divorce papers.
4. Is There A Spell To Become A Mermaid That Actually Works?
Fans of The Little Mermaid probably hoped that bmx4life would get a response, if only to pal around with Sebastian and Flounder under the sea. Just be careful of that sea with Ursela, cause she wants your voice and Prince Eric to boot. All kidding aside, it looks as if this bmx4life might have been serious about this, especially in their belief of mermaids. So whatever you do, do not say that mermaids don’t exist. That would be offensive. Not only to bmx4life, but to Animal Planet, as well.
3. Why Does My Screen Say www.Bangbros.com After My Son Leaves Even Though He Tells Me He’s Doing Homework?
Well Robert, the only thing we can say is that your son has decided to partake in some extra-curricular activities that involve a certain website that you probably already know about, but told your wife you needed to research. Asking if this is a homework site does not help your case any, because although we have not gone to it ourselves, we can only imagine what the girl is wearing (or doing), and that should give you enough proof that your boy is up to something other than Algebra. Of course, he could be studying Anatomy, but there are better sites for that. The real question you should be asking is where your son got the credit card to even create an account.
2. My Bro Has Not Had His First Period Yet?
There’s not really much to say about this one. Either that is once confused, yet concerned sister, or just a troll thinking he was going to be funny. Still, maybe he was, since he did make the list. Okay, maybe it isn’t fair to assume that Shoe is a male, since women have snarky senses of humor as well, but come on, admit it? You thought Shoe was a guy at first too, right? Guys (especially those of the teenage variety) tend to think that this kind of thing is funny. Don’t believe us, well then check out that South Park episode where Cartman thought he got his period, and Stan was upset that he was the only one who didn’t get one.
1. How Do I Ask A Question On Yahoo Answers? Please Help, I Need To Ask An URGENT Question?
Okay, so this one isn’t the most outrageous one on the list by far, but it makes it all the way to number one based on pure troll-worthiness. Someone had to be bored enough to actually come up with this, then have the stones to put it on Yahoo Answers, knowing full well how ridiculous this is. If that doesn’t scream bizarre (or lame, if you are so inclined), we don’t know what does anymore.