Sex is an important part of a relationship and one would assume that because you are in a relationship, you are getting sex on the regular. What most people fail to realize is that even in a committed relationship, sex is not guaranteed, and this lack of sex can be for several reasons. A relationship can become boring, complacent and even toxic which forces the parties involved to pull away from what was once a healthy exciting place in their lives. Unfortunately, this is not the case for all sexless relationships; some women really want to get down and dirty with their men but are being forced to re-evaluate their decision due to physical and mental constraints. Fortunately for guys, a sexless relationship is more common than most would believe and it is usually something that can be fixed after a friendly chat, habit changes or even the ultimate decision to quit while you’re ahead. What is important to remember in this scenario is that sex is not a guarantee and that we must always be striving to improve or at least maintain ourselves when we are in a committed relationship; we do not only get up for us in the morning anymore, we get up for our partners who have to interact with us every day whether we are happy or not. Has a partner ever withheld sex from you? If so, why? Comment below after you enjoy the article.
12. She Is Over You
Sometimes it is just not meant to be, most relationships are there to prepare you for your ultimate partner. Yes, break-ups suck and yes we all try to hang on to something that we know is doomed to fail; when she withholds sex, it could be one of the things on this list or it could just be that you two are no longer compatible. Do not beat yourself up though, someone else will come along and in the meantime you get to flirt, date and have as much emotionless sex as possible (if that is your thing).
11. You Haven’t Put A Ring On It
Dr Laura advises that you never shack up; however, if you do, make sure that you at least have some intentions to marry her. It is selfish to have a girl waiting around for you to marry her because you have gotten comfortable, if this is the case than you cannot blame her for not wanting to have sex with you. There is only a small window of time until she starts to feel like you are taking her for granted; so if you want to continue to reap the benefits of being in a sexual relationship, then maybe you should consider marrying her considering the amount of time you have been together, of course. Honestly, you are lucky that this is not back in the day when everyone waited till after marriage to lose it.
10. You Don’t Take Her Out
Just because you are in a relationship does not mean the wining and dining has to stop; staying in all day and all night is boring and mind-numbing (especially when it is the weekend and all your friends are out). Sure she could leave you at home or let you go out with the guys, but sometimes she just wants quality time with her man; a small dinner or going out to see a movie as opposed to watching Netflix on the couch, even just going out for some ice cream or walking around the city. It is healthy for both of you and besides when women are mad one of the first things they do is withhold sex; not intentionally but no one wants to have sex with someone they are upset with.
9. You Have No Idea Where Her GSpot is
Either that or you refuse to acknowledge it; one of the two will end up in a sexless relationship. Some men are totally clueless when it comes to oral pleasure; some believe it is not necessary, some do not want to go anywhere near it and some just have no idea what they are doing when they get down there. A girl can only take so much if your foreplay game sucks, that is grounds for you to be cut off immediately. Come on, that is even grounds to be dumped after being given so many chances. No woman wants to be stuck in a relationship where after 10 years you still have no idea how everything works.
8. Horrible After Sex Mannerisms
After the deed everyone has a different reaction; some people cuddle, some people turn the TV on some people roll over and some fall sleep, all are acceptable. However, there are a few after-sex mannerisms that are (let’s say) questionable, like getting up and leaving right after, celebrating your orgasm by pumping your fist in the air or patting yourself on the back for a job well done. Ah, who in their right mind thinks it is cool to “big themselves up” after sex? It is different when you get a compliment and you feel cool about it, but when you go out of your way to assume that you were phenomenal and totally ignore her, well… you probably will not be having sex again for a long time.
7. You Make Her Feel Insecure
Here is a quick way to be cut off; no girl wants to hear you talking about how banging someone else’s body is or be compared to a celebrity’s photoshopped picture in a magazine. When you are picky about her appearance, she will quickly lose interest in you; she will be too insecure to want to fool around and your constant harping about what you “usually go for” is downright disrespectful. Reading this, you are probably thinking to yourself, “what guy actually does that?” Well unfortunately there are quite a few out there that make passive comments sometimes intentional, other times not.
6. Your Technique
Heavy petting, aggressive boob grabbing, rough kissing; OMG your technique is so unappealing and a huge turnoff. A lot of the times your partner will drop subtle hints regarding what she likes or what she hates about what you are doing, so pay attention because one would assume that you would like to know when she is having an awful time because of something that you are doing. Here is where communication plays a helpful role; do not take it as an insult, the more you listen to her the better sex you will have and both of you will get pleasure from it instead of her refusing to have sex with you altogether.
5. Your Hygiene
You have become too complacent, too comfortable, or you do not care about your appearance and what others may think of you; this includes you girlfriend. Now that you have got the girl, you have stopped trying to impress her and you go back to living the bachelor lifestyle; rarely showering, rarely combing your hair, you wear old clothes that are not ironed and hang off of your body like excess skin. Yet you want her to have sex with you because…? No girl anywhere wants to lay down with a man who does not smell nice (the only time it is acceptable to have a tiny bit of a stench is when you just had a really tough workout). After all, how would you feel if the roles were reversed?
4. You Are Too Aggressive
This can also easily translate into “you beg too much and it is a total turn off”. When a guy gets too aggressive and is constantly in need of sex or attention from you, the effect of “aw, how cute” wears off, and it goes from something you have fun doing to a chore that she does not want to participate in. Clearly this is a case of having different sex drives but begging and pleading and being so forth right can come off as pushy, aggressive and a fun sucker. Let’s face it, if you are not having fun during sex then why exactly are you doing it?
3. No Confidence
If you are insecure she will run for the hills; unfortunately, confidence plays a huge role in how you approach your relationships. If you are constantly looking for reassurance, or worried about her cheating on you, she will be so turned off and not even want to lay in the same bed with you let alone have sex with you. Lacking in confidence can quickly translate to you lacking in bed; you are unsure if she is having a good time and even when she says she is loving it, you are still so insecure that you ruin it for the both of you. You cannot blame her for not wanting to have sex with you; your insecurity is ruining her good time.
2. You Cheated On Her
A relationship is built on trust, and once that trust is broken it is almost impossible to get it back. You have not only hurt her feelings but you have bruised her ego, tested her security and confidence but most of all you have betrayed her. It is hard to get back into bed and be intimate with someone once you have already ruined what was once really good. Even though she may say she is over it, she cannot help but punish you when that memory creeps back into her head, or when you look at other women when you’re with her. Long story short; do not expect any nookie when you’re renting yourself out to other women.
1. You Suck At Communicating
When you lack in conversation skills, you miss out on a lot in life. You have to have something interesting to say, something that keeps her hanging on your every word. Your looks can only take you so far and we all know that beauty fades and all you have left is the relationship you have built up and the great conversations you have together. That being said a girl does not enjoy having sex with a guy who she considers boring and brings nothing interesting to their relationship. There is a particular passion in words and women are much more sexually attracted to a guy who can speak his mind and bring something intellectual to the table.