We’ve all been there. You meet someone and start getting along with him really well. The relationship gets serious, and you start talking about a future. You may even move in together and discuss marriage. Then, the issues that you didn’t want to talk about (because you were so in love) become too big to ignore, and you feel that a breakup is eminent. However, instead of letting things happen naturally, you do all you can to put off breaking up. Since your focus is on breaking up (as opposed to fixing the problems in your relationship), things actually get worse.
Some women don’t want to break up because they actually love the guy they’re with, even if the relationship is strained and stressful. Some women are determined to “make it work” because they’re tired of starting over in relationships and are ready to get married. There are also women who are simply scared to be alone, and feel that they’re only valuable when they’re in a relationship. Unfortunately, these aren’t ideal reasons for holding on to a relationship long after it’s time to move on. Here are 12 of the most ridiculous things women do to put off breaking up.
12. Dramatic Outbursts
When a woman is desperate to hold on to her relationship, she’s likely to get dramatic. This means having outbursts about things that aren’t really important, and doing all she can to get her man’s attention. In her mind, any attention is good attention. As long as she can get him to understand her “needs” or listen to her whine about something she can easily solve herself, she figures she can buy a little more time in the relationship. However, this could make a man run away even faster. Some will stay for a little while just for the sake of being a nice guy, but the adult tantrums are usually a pretty terrible plan.
11. Complete Personality Changes
Sometimes, as a last resort, women will completely change who they are just to keep the man in their lives around just a little longer. If he’s a fan of sports, she suddenly becomes interested in his favorite team, even though she never wanted to watch games before. If he wanted to have his friends over more, she may start inviting them herself to show that she’s willing to be social. These attempts, of course, are not sincere, and will possibly stop if the guy agrees to give the relationship another shot. Chances are these are issues the couple has been fighting about for years, so finally “meeting her partner’s needs” is just a way for the woman to technically remain in a relationship.
10. Reminiscing On The Past
When a woman feels that her romantic relationship is coming to an end, she may start trying to remind her partner about the good times they had in the past. Acts of reminiscing can include sending a song to her partner that describes the feelings they once shared, or sending him a picture of the two of them in happier times. Yes, it’s important for couples to remember why they fell in love, and to review some of the things that make them happy. However, when it’s clear that the love is gone and it’s time to end the relationship, women may try to bring up all the great memories as one last desperate attempt to avoid a breakup.
9. Giving More Attention
Women may also start paying more attention to their men when they know that a breakup is probably around the corner. This can include cooking his favorite meal, making more time for sex, or actually paying attention when he talks about his day. Giving more attention is the woman’s way of grasping at the last straws of the relationship and hoping that her man will see her “effort.” Again, this is just a temporary fix for a relationship that is beyond repair. After the guy “falls” for this tactic, the woman is likely to go back to being inattentive. Chances are she’s dissatisfied with the relationship when she tries this trick, but doesn’t want to break up, because she’s afraid it will make her look bad. After all, if she was so happy with her man, she wouldn’t have stopped doing things to keep his attention.
8. Giving Less Attention
On the contrary, a woman may stop giving her man less attention when she knows that the relationship is in trouble. Since men are naturally “hunters” or the ones who usually make the first moves in relationships, some women feel that if they give them men something to “chase” again, he will regain interest. It’s a pretty risky move, and it usually doesn’t work. It’s one of the ways that women try to avoid breaking up. However, when a guy is already losing interest, ignoring him in order to beg for his attention is probably a mistake. He may take it to mean it’s perfectly fine to move on.
7. Making Him Jealous
Women may do things to make their men jealous, when it would be much more logical to simply break up. Doing things like going out more with her friends, wearing provocative clothing and texting or using social media in front of her man are signs that she wants to make him jealous. Some guys may fall for it for a while, but other men have very little patience for this kind of behavior and view it as childish. Women often use the jealousy tool to see if their man cares enough about them to improve the relationship when her attention veers elsewhere. However, this tactic doesn’t usually work.
6. Role Reversal
Sometimes, women feel as though they can impress their men by reversing the roles in the relationship. For instance, a woman may take on extra hours at work to buy something nice for her man. Or, she may plan a date and pay for the meal. In some extreme cases, women who were desperate to get married even proposed to their significant others. These are simply attempts to make sure that the relationship doesn’t end, and probably doesn’t make either party feel comfortable. Most women probably wouldn’t want to propose marriage to their partners, and most men take pride in being able to pay for dates. So, even though times have changed and roles have become more liberal, complete role reversal probably isn’t the best idea.
5. Making More Effort (In the Looks Department)
When it’s pretty clear that a relationship is on the rocks, a woman may start upping her effort when it comes to her looks. It’s no secret that men are visual creatures, and women may conclude that if they improve their looks, their men will change their minds about breaking up. However, it’s also true that men have to be emotionally connected to a woman to want to maintain a relationship with her. If he’s willing to re-establish this connection, the way a woman looks will just be icing on the cake as the couple repairs their romance. However, simply getting a haircut and buying a new dress isn’t enough to put the relationship back on track.
4. Picking Fights
Again, women think if they can just get a guy to pay attention to them for a little longer, they can delay a breakup. This, however, doesn’t mean that the relationship will improve in any way. However, some women are simply focused on being in a relationship, and don’t give much thought to actually making the partnership work. Women will often pick fights with their spouses or significant others in order to at least get their man to look in their direction. However, it’s pretty clear that men don’t like fighting, and the more you try to argue with them, the more determined they will be to break up.
3. Covert Revenge
When a woman wants to stay together but still wants her partner to know that she doesn’t appreciate his treatment towards her, she may start doing things to get back at him. For instance, she may be a little friendlier than usual towards men when she’s with her significant other. Or, she may decide to start working late a few nights a week, so that her spouse can see how it feels to have dinner and put the kids to bed without her. In most cases, men don’t see this as revenge, but just get resentful, which can only make the problem worse and confirm that it’s time to break up. After all, when a couple feels the need to play tit for tat, it’s probably a good idea to all it quits.
Unfortunately, some women resort to flat-out begging in order to get their men to stay. Yes, it’s pretty shameful, but being in love can make people do some pretty crazy things. Women will sometimes cry at their man’s feet and beg him not to leave. While this may be considered a romantic gesture if it were the other way around, when women beg, it shows that they’re afraid to be alone. This is not an attractive quality. The constant begging can also be seen as overly dramatic and denote a lack of self-esteem to a man, which will confirm for him that he needs to end the relationship.
One of the biggest mistakes that women make when their relationships are in trouble is denial. Some women simply act as though the possible breakup is not really happening. They tell their family and friends that everything is fine. They continue to put on a brave face at work. She knows in the back of her mind that her relationship is coming to an end, but can’t bring herself to be honest about it. This is completely ridiculous, since a man may have moved on emotionally while she is still denying that there is even a problem. It’s dangerous to handle relationships this way, since the reality can be devastating once it finally settles in.