Ah, the bromance; it has always been around but only recently has someone come up with a perfectly fitting word to associate it with. A bromance consists of two male friends who are essentially attached at the hip. It is a combination of brother and romance; you love him but you are not gay, you would do anything for him but in a super platonic way and you feel comfortable falling asleep next to him in your boxers because you are totally comfortable with your sexuality around him. Like women you share style tips, relationship advice and you are brutally honest because it is the best policy; but one has to question, what happens when your bromance starts to become a nuisance? When you cannot see yourself being able to spend another second with him without wanting to knock him out; your bromance has officially become a toxic mess. The stigma over ending a friendship does not just plague women, it burdens men as well and as much as we all like to believe that they have a cooler demeanor when it comes to dropping friends, they too feel the same embarrassment and feeling of failure as women do. A toxic bromance can destroy you and ultimately your friendship will crumble at the bits anyway; always do yourself a favor and cut ties with the misery. A miserable, jealous person can never want the best for you. If you think you are in a toxic bromance, read on to see a few signs of what you have in store if you have not experienced them already.
10. He Constantly Fights With Your Girlfriend
There are several cases of guys hating their best friend’s girlfriend and even after she proves herself, he can only manage to hate her more. Jealousy has reared its ugly head with this one and he says a lot of things that he will never be able to take back. Unfortunately, for you this has become not only awkward but life consuming, as you are always playing referee and never just able to hang out with your two favorite people in the world. Even after you have expressed to your bro that she may be “the one”, he still seems to have an unidentified issue with her. Now, you have to choose between the two.
9. He Constantly Fights With You
Everything is a fight, an argument, a minor disagreement or a tantrum. No conversation is pleasant and he or you always seems to be upset about one thing or another; how toxic is that? It looks like you fight more than you get along and he looks like he enjoys picking a fight with you. This is a classic cry for attention; he would rather be fighting with you as long as it keeps you talking to him, how sad is that? It is more of a relationship than a friendship and it can only get worse. He is like a child. Negative attention is better than no attention.
8. You’re Growing Up, He’s Not
You finished post secondary, he dropped out, you got a job in your field, he is jumping from job to job, you invested in a home, and he has made himself quite comfortable in his mother’s basement (which he has a snazzy name for because he is embarrassed that he lives in his mom’s basement). It looks as though you have grown up and he is stuck in his adolescence; not every friendship is made to last and sometimes it is by the divine grace of god that he has been such a loser because it makes it easier for you to drop him (as cold as that sounds).
7. You Have Nothing In Common Anymore
The silence in the room is not awkward enough, so the subpar conversation you tried to start should make it worse. It is a shame that society does not know when to quit. Why sit back and endure awkward moments and a lackluster “good time” because you and him used to be so close? It is definite that changes will happen in everyone’s life and a lot of the time that includes leaving old friendships behind. Sometimes people are in your life for a certain reason and when that time has come and gone, it is okay to admit it. Do not worry, it is almost a guarantee that he also realizes it is time to say goodbye; but he also realizes no one else will put up with his crap.
6. You’re Not Excited To Hang Out With Him
When it has become a chore to hang out with your bro, you know you have a problem on your hands. What guy does not like to sit back and chop it up with his best friend? If playing video games together and stuffing unhealthy food down your throat cannot warm the dead silence in the room, well nothing can. You have nothing to say to each other anymore and furthermore, you probably do not like the same things as you used to and he is probably still stuck in age 16 mode, where petty things occupy his spare time as opposed to productive things.
5. You Feel Better About Yourself When You’re Around Him
So, this may sound like a positive thing but it is actually a huge negative. If you instantly feel better about who you are as a human being when you are around someone who is supposed to be your best friend, that is a huge problem. This means he is such a mess and his life is so sketchy that you don’t envy anything about it. On top of him bringing out the “best” in you, it seems that you are happy to see that his life is in extreme distress. How many more signs do you need that you are involved in a toxic relationship?
4. It Is Physically And Emotionally Draining
Friendships have a huge impact on your mental and physical health, instead of a boost like you receive in a positive friendship. In a negative relationship, your body begins to break down. You get knots in your stomach when you even think of meeting up with him, you may even experience migraines, back pain and resort to vomiting because of the stress of having to hide your feelings towards this person. When you feel these relationship pains, it is probably time to move on and quit while you are ahead. No relationship is worth any kind of discomfort, emotionally or physically.
3. He Constantly Throws You Under The Bus
Sabotage is an obvious sign that your friend has become a negative being in your life. He no longer supports your achievements; in fact, he seems downright jealous of them. He always wants to discredit you in public and makes sure that he has an audience of people who hold significant value in your life. Even though this thrashing comes off as a best man speech given at a horrible time, do not be fooled because chances are he is jealous and thinks that you do not deserve all the good coming your way and will do just about anything to make sure that not only you know it, but everyone else does as well.
2. He No Longer Compliments You
Obviously we are referring to compliments here as in you are a good fit, not as in he no longer compliment’s your clothes or your hair etc; however, if he no longer does that he may be over you. It is nice to have a buddy who people can associate you with and respect your friendship as a true, real thing. He is supposed to be your balance so when people begin to like you more than they like him, and they see him as an annoyance and maybe start inviting you out without him on purpose, you know that he no longer compliments you in any way.
1. You Dream About A Life Without Him
Okay, so maybe not dream about it but you definitely welcome it with open arms. You constantly catch yourself imagining your future and like a bad ex girlfriend, he is in none of those plans. In fact, you may even have it all planned out in your head; how you are going to tell him it’s time to go (and everyone thought girls were dramatic). When guys break up it is basically the end of the world and they grieve the loss just as much as any girl would losing her best friend. This is a sure sign to cut your losses while you still can.