Everything is fine when you’re still talking on the phone or online, but once you meet someone in person, everything changes. Maybe you’ve got a bad case of smelly breath. Maybe your personality just doesn’t match with hers. Maybe you just came on a little too strong, and she just wants to put an end to the awkwardness.
Whatever the reason, sometimes dates just don’t work out and the girl needs to bail. For these times, she accelerates “How to Lose a Guy in Ten Days” and finds a fast track out in a matter of hours. Here are ten secret signs she’s trying to cut the date short. Whether or not these methods were planned beforehand or were improvised on the fly, be aware of the date ditcher.
10. She’s Being Plain Jane
How can she make sure to not impress you? She won’t pay attention to the way she dresses. It’s hard to deny that guys like their girls to look their best – they are generally considered the more visual gender.
So if she doesn’t want it to go beyond the first date, she’ll add a little slob to her routine. She’ll bring out her best grungy duds from an outdated era. Or if this is a mid-date bail, she could pull out some odd colored lipstick from her bag. Blue or purple lips will give anyone cold feet.
9. She Suddenly Develops A Perspiration Problem
A little strategically placed wetness is better than a few lashes with a wet noodle: it’s quite easy for her to fake sweaty pits. Always be wary when she heads to the ladies room, as a brief trip to the washrooms can lead to a sudden perspiration problem. There have even been stories of women using tuna juice to really take it to the next level!
If she’s wearing a thin fabric in an unforgiving color (aka not black or white), she may be attempting a stinky getaway. For added effect, she might do a few arm stretches when she returns to the table to make sure you get a good whiff.
8. Bad Habits
If she’s trying to cut the date short, be warned: she will hone in to your pet peeves. It may take a little experimentation to see what pushes your buttons, but the relentless date ditcher will eventually get to you.
She’ll start chomping on her nails. She’ll try picking her nose or scraping and flossing her teeth at the table. She’ll insert “like” in between every other word or create artwork with her food. She may even continually change her mind when it comes to what she orders and keep calling back the waiter to change the order.
7. She Talks… Incessantly
While women are better known for their words than men, there’s a difference between healthy dialogue and a monologue. She will give you all the details of her day down to the color of her boss’ tie and how long it took her to microwave her lunch.
She’ll start a lecture on the most boring, strangest subjects, just to get out of the date. She’ll tell you her life story, detailing every member of her family, starting with her mother in labor. You won’t be allowed to get a word in, and you probably won’t want to ask her out on a second date.
6. TMI: She Starts Talking About Her Menstrual Cycle
Sure, guys know that girls get visits from their red friends every month, but they really don’t need to know where the woman is in her cycle. She’ll talk about ovulation, she’ll complain about cramps or excuse herself to change her tampon – she’ll be sure to let you know.
The date ditcher will compare the pros and cons of pads and tampons, asking which you prefer. God forbid she uses ketchup to simulate a leak. She may or may not be flowing, but the conversation certainly won’t be.
5. She Takes a Call From a Male Friend
If she thinks she might need to put an end to things, she’ll phone a friend, most likely a guy she keeps in her friend zone for just this type of situation. The most prepared date ditchers will even arrange for one of said friends to call and check in at a certain time during the evening.
She’ll make some plans to meet up with him, making sure to reference the call in your conversation afterward with “male” pronouns. Hopefully he doesn’t stop by to “join” your date. If she needs to bail quickly, there will certainly be an emergency that she’ll have to help with.
4. She Turns the Tables
Clumsiness can be a real turnoff, especially when you’re the one who pays the price. She’ll take a cue from the clumsy waiter and “accidentally” spill her drink or aim the condiment bottle in the wrong direction.
She may not want to appear rude, so she’ll profusely apologize and offer to buy you a new shirt or a new pair of pants or pay your dry cleaning bill. Regardless of how apologetic she is, don’t give in and head home in a hurry to find a change of clothes – that’s what she wants.
3. She Plays Drunk
Intoxication can easily excuse rude behavior while still getting you to run the other way. Is she normally a lightweight? Well, if she’s planning on cutting the date short, she’ll take it to the next level. She’ll be the girl who becomes a drunk after one drink – and most likely an angry one.
A girl with a gutter mouth isn’t exactly attractive, especially when you’re the one taking the heat of the profanity. She’ll pretend she doesn’t remember a bit of it the next day when she calls to see how you’re doing – she’ll be expecting rejection. Don’t give in.
2. She Has An Emotional Breakdown
While men know that women are usually more expressive with their emotions than men, that doesn’t mean that men still can’t become overwhelmed by a woman’s display of excessive emotion.
Becoming histrionic or inconsolable, she’ll make a big scene and literally melt to the floor and hide under the table. Her acting skills will be impressive, but don’t be swayed: do everything in your power to remain a gentleman in order to keep the date going.
1. The Handshake
If she still hasn’t shaken you off by the end of the night, she’ll have one last chance before the night is over. You’ll be thinking you had a great time and you’ll want to seal the deal. She’ll most likely want to run away.
When you go in for the goodnight kiss, she’ll give you a firm handshake and a clear signal that this was no more than a little business transaction. This should make it clear what kind of deal she wants to seal – or rather reject. You tried your best, but it wasn’t meant to be. Don’t beat yourself up; as long as you know these secret signs, everything will be alright.