There’s a handsome man across the room, you both lock eyes and he starts to make his way over, all is going well until his first words are spoken and his breath is unbearable. Bad smells are not something that we can easily get past while getting to know someone, so if their poor hygiene is noticeable on the first date, don’t be shocked when she goes running for the hills.
There comes a time when you need to ask yourself, is it something I’m doing? When all of your relationships seem to fall apart around the same time and for the same reason, it’s a good time to clue in and see if you can do something to change the pattern. This is not to say that you are at fault for all failed relationships, but there could be things you are doing that are a huge turn-off for her.
11. Brashly Self-Confident
We don’t mind if you tell us about your promotion or your great workout at the gym, but the moment you start telling us that you are God’s gift to women, we’re pretty quick to run away.
In general, women find themselves less attractive than they really are, while men (you guessed it) find themselves more attractive than they actually are. So the next time, you want to tell us about how the flight attendant was checking you out or how everybody is jealous of you at work, do us a favor and bite your tongue – hard.
10. Lack of Communication
There is nothing that makes a woman get frustrated like a man who can’t communicate. We don’t think this should be rocket science. If you say you are coming at 6 p.m., show up at 6 p.m. If we leave you a voicemail or send you a text, don’t wait until tomorrow to respond.
Women tend to keep track of how well her man is keeping in touch. Once he starts to lose contact, we figure that either the spark is gone, or he’s found it with someone else – or maybe both. Show your girl she matters and pick up the phone.
9. Bad Breath
Perhaps this one seems too obvious, but some men don’t seem to get it. Take a whiff of your own breath before you even think about putting your lips to ours. A good teeth brushing and a swig of mouthwash should happen before we see your face.
Going to eat garlic for dinner? Be sure to bring breath mints, breath spray or gum so that we can both enjoy the goodnight kiss.
8. Ex Obsession
While we do appreciate your honesty about your relationship history, we don’t need the gory details. Please don’t compare us or tell us about all the places you went on dates together.
If you want to ruin the mood quickly, please remind us of how you celebrated your first anniversary at this very same restaurant and how your ex loved the raspberry cheesecake. If not, try looking into our eyes and obsessing over us for a minute – or longer.
7. Still Stuck to Mom
There is nothing wrong with a man who loves his Momma. However, when a romantic evening gets put on pause so that you can call home, or when you pass on mom’s tips about how your woman should cook, clean or groom herself, it gets old – fast.
Please show your mother you love her, but let us know we’re no. 1 and that you appreciate what we do – even if it isn’t exactly how your mum did it.
6. No PDA
If you think we’re talking about something you take to business meetings, you may need help in this area.
We do appreciate knowing that your love for us is more than skin deep. However, if all of a sudden you back off and stop putting your hand around our shoulder or giving spontaneous pecks on the cheek when we’re out and about, we notice.
We want to know that you want to be with us and that you want the world to see. If not, we start questioning if there is someone else that you are afraid will see us together. Even if we’ve outgrown make-out sessions on street corners, we still like to have you securely close – all the time.
5. Not Knowing Your Limits
It’s great to go out for drinks or have a few beers. Once your speech starts getting slurred, you start losing more than just your speech.
You don’t have to prove to us that you can hold your liquor. We don’t really care how many shots you can take or how many beers you can chug. We’d much rather that you were sober enough to drive us home at the end of the night.
4. Wallet Woes
We don’t mind splitting dinner once in a while or even paying our own way once in a while, but the moment you start cancelling dates because you don’t have money, the fun is over.
If your pocketbook is empty, or you just don’t want to pay, be straightforward. It’s better to have this conversation before the date starts, not in the midst of it.
We don’t expect five-star hotels and five-course meals. Pick something within your budget and treat us. Unless you’re a millionaire, we’re not anticipating a yacht to pick us up. Just make us feel like we’re a million bucks, and we’ll both be happy.
3. The Cologne Cloud
Don’t get us wrong, we like a man who smells nice – just keep it subtle. If we start sneezing, coughing, gagging or getting a headache because of your smell, don’t count on us sticking around for dessert – or a second date.
When a man wears too much cologne we assume that: a. He has really bad body odor, b. He doesn’t like to shower. c. He’s really insecure or d. He really has no sense of smell. None of these leaves a particularly good impression. If in doubt, just a dab will do you. Same goes with aftershave and deodorant.
2. Swearing Like a Sailor
It’s not necessary to talk like a Harvard professor, but we do want you to be able to converse intelligently with mom and dad, our co-workers and our friends. If every other word is an expletive, our relationship is not likely to be smooth sailing for long.
Most people swear when they are angry or frustrated, and we don’t want you to feel that way when you are around us. We like men who can keep their cool and can maybe even grace us with a sonnet or two. Now that’s hot!
1. No Commitment
We don’t expect or even want a ring on the first date – or even in the first month, but we notice when a guy can’t commit. Whether it is the guy who has a new girl every week, gave up on his marriage after a year or two or just can’t seem to keep a job, it leaves us with a bad taste in our mouths.
If you want us to stick around forever, let us know. Don’t throw wife into your vocabulary yet or start making scrapbooks of our future children but communicating that you’re thinking of your future with us in it, keeps us in the picture long-term as well.