Men are men and women are women. Duh! Men are from Mars, the god of war, and women are from Venus, the goddess of love. That’s exciting…and scary too. Why? Well because men and women are, literally, on different planets. No matter how close you are or how loved up you are, there are going to be issues because girls and women just do things in a relationship that are like crazy and weird and annoying as far as guys are concerned. Like what? Like getting mad at you for no reason. Like using her cellphone as a boyfriend remote control device. Like trying to manipulate and control you. And whether she is all sweetness and light or shouting out orders, the point is still the same. And? To get the upper hand, to control how things go, to make you think what goes wrong is your fault and not hers. Sound familiar? Well, read on. Sure, women are women and men are men. And, young or old, a woman is more like another woman than she is like a guy. But there are just things younger women tend to do in a relationship and things that older women are “guilty” of when loved up with a guy. So, here are 7 annoying things mature women are guilty of and 8 truly annoying things younger babes are guilty of when they are loved up and in a relationship.
15. The Young Door Mat Gets The Hump
You know how it goes. You ask what she wants to do tonight. She says she doesn’t care. You ask her where she wants to go to eat and she says you should choose. Then, you go to the movies and she is sitting there with her arms locked killer tight across her chest pouting, because she really wanted to go to a concert. Or, you take her for Sushi and she picks at her food and spends the whole meal texting her friends on her cellphone. Well, actually, she’s complaining about how you forced her to go to this poxy Sushi place when all you wanted was a pizza. But, does she come out and actually complain? Maybe yes. Maybe not. So, you never know what exactly went wrong. Maybe you even start thinking that it actually is your fault.
14. The Controlling Mature Woman
“You aren’t going to wear that tie, are you?” Or, “How can you possibly think of voting for that jerk?” “Well, it’s a free country, but if I were you…” It’s like you are waiting for her to catch you doing something right, but she never does. Whatever you think, believe, or say is wrong, stupid, and laughable. The sneaky controlling ones only do it when nobody else is around. They are the “closet” controllers. Your friends may even think she is very nice. The outed controller are the ones who want to humiliate you in public. Those witches wait for your boss to come over and then criticize your choice of wine or (nightmare scenario) give you direct orders. “Go and make the coffee and turn down the heat while you’re at it.” Don’t expect a promotion any time soon.
13. The Young Chick And The Cellphone
It’s going great. Just great. And the s*x is worth a little hassle. It’s not so much that she is turning up everywhere you are. If she does, run a mile. But, you do get dozens of texts from her a day and if you don’t respond in a split second, she’s texting again asking what’s wrong. Think of it as a boyfriend remote control device. Where are you? What are you doing? Who are you with? Send me a picture of what you are doing. Who’s that girl in the background? She’s telling you that she loves you to the moon and back. How do you top that? Well, you don’t. That’s the problem. And even worse? She’s on your case because she’s the one instigating all the texts. You are only responding. And probably not fast enough. And, trust us, if she’s s*xting you, she thinks she owns you.
12. The Mature Social Media Queen
OK, she’s mature enough to have outgrown Snapchat and all those dumb puppy dog noses and rainbows, but she’s well and truly Facebooking and Instagraming all the time. Just about everything you do, every place you go, ends up on social media. Like, very little, if anything, about what you get up to is private. It’s not just that you are posing for one selfie after another or getting in the frame for cute snogging pictures. What really counts here is that all that stuff gets posted. Like all the time. Think it’s harmless? Think again. If s*xting by a younger woman implies ownership of the guy, the social media diva is posting to make it clear to the world in general, and women in particular, that you are taken. Tied up. Off the market. Look out if you are suddenly posing in front of a bridal boutique. It’s Bridezilla time.
11. Younger Women And The “I’m So Stupid” Act
That’s another way of saying she is acting dumb and dumber to get attention and to try and trick the guy into thinking he is really, really in control when the poor sucker is being reeled in for the kill. It often comes with giggling and blushing. Like, she can’t figure out how to use the remote control or how to transfer data between her old phone and new one. She is inviting you to jump on your white steed and ride in and rescue her. If it really gets bad, she is telling you how much smarter you are than she is. Closely associated to this is the young girlfriend who pretends to be clumsy or awkward. “Oops, I did it again… and again… and again.” Make no mistake. She’s training you to wait on her hand and foot. Next, she’ll be incapable of loading the dishwasher. Just wait and see.
10. The Mature Woman Dominatrix Effect
Mature women sometimes like to be in command…superior-like. They have all the answers and then some. Think it sounds kinky? Are you imagining getting punished for being a bad boy by a masked babe in black leather with a whip? Ouch, it hurts so good. Would it be always that spicy? The dominatrix is the chick with an overload of testosterone who never cracks a smile and runs the show. She’s the boss. Think Glenn Close‘s commander thing in Guardians of the Galaxy 2 or Kathy Bates in Misery. Just looking at them scares you witless. They’ve got more balls than any guy you know. They are wearing the pants in this relationship and don’t you forget it. Now, if they’ve got the black leather gear and the little whip, you might decide if it’s worth it or not.
9. The Young Women Who Are Way Too Willing
How could this be a bad thing? Well, the kind of chick who says hello one minute and then tries to drag you into bed the next minute was probably doing the same thing the night before and the night before that and the night before that. She’s the kind of chick who meets guys in dark and noisy clubs night after night after night and ends up in bed within minutes. Or maybe, it’s just the back of a car. Now, this kind of behavior may be a sign that she’s a crazy AF chick. Maybe she’s just desperate to snag a guy…any guy. Gosh, she knows what she’s walking around with. It could be catching. Odds are, if you go out with her more than once, she’ll be crying for no good reason by date three. That way, you will definitely know she is both young and crazy.
8. The “Aggressive” Cougar
Studies have shown that mature men in relationships with mature women who are s*xually aggressive get a case of the limp equipment more often than men who feel that it is a 50/50 kind of thing. Something about feeling emasculated. It hits you in young manhood. You know, the cougar versus the Lion King. And what happens if a cougar and a toy boy hook up? Well, same thing happens, but it takes a little longer. Well, actually, that’s the problem. It doesn’t take much time at all. Like a wham bam, “thank you ma’am” kind of thing. It’s not a dominatrix thing. It’s a predator thing. She is the cougar on the prowl, stalking her prey. Liberated, new man or not, you want to do your fair share of the prowling thing. Strutting your Lion King stuff and winning the day. Put your foot down and get something else up.
7. The Young Lady And The Stepford Effect
She’s such a sweet, young thing. Think compliant on steroids. Your wish is my command is her thing. You want to take her camping in the middle of a Wisconsin winter? Sure, she’s up for it. You want to have all of your best friends over to watch the big game on her birthday? She’s absolutely purring with contentment. And she’ll keep the food and beer coming. Don’t you worry. Guys everywhere are thinking that all sounds pretty good, huh? OK, let’s say you are a jerk and you have no guilt about constantly dumping on her big time. Trust us, there’s a big, big problem. What is it? She’s got you by the short and curlies, you see? You owe her. You are in her debt. She’s doing all the giving and you are doing all the taking. Plus, remember, you are validating her dependence on you. You’re stuck. Or will be if you let it go on very long. Hey, look what happened in The Stepford Wives. It was not pretty.
6. My Way Or The Highway Cougar
There are two ways of doing everything as far as this kind of mature woman is concerned. It’s either her way or the wrong way. She’s the kind of person who goes through boyfriends, pals, and jobs at an alarming rate. Why? Because, it’s not just that she needs to run the show, but she’s got to determine what’s right and wrong, good and bad. So, if you are in a relationship with this kind of babe, she’s got to say what happens next, like all the time, down to the minutest detail. Oh, she can be charming, but cross her at your peril. She thinks her “opinion” are facts and that your opinions are wrong. She’s cracking the whip, saying what’s in and out. And who is in or out. Like you? Well, yes. She’ll get mad one day and go off in a huff and not come back. Lock the door and have a party.
5. The Young Drama Queen
Her motto? “Make drama, not memories.” It’s a way of getting her way and getting attention, all at the same time. She’s got to be able to stir things up and cause a fuss or she’s not happy. With the DQ, you lurch from one crisis to the next. One minute you are all loved up. The next minute, she’s screaming and crying and maybe throwing things. It’s a sneaky way of keeping things off balance and leaving you reeling and not knowing what’s coming next. And it’s very strange to say, but this kind of dramatic behavior can be addictive. Normal girls can get to seem, well, boring after time spent with the practiced drama queen. Our advice? If your hot young babe is a DQ, find a boring chick. At least you’ll keep all your body parts intact.
4. Kiss A Good Man And Turn Him Into A Frog Mature Chick
Where do drama queens go when they get older? The answer is nowhere. They just turn into the kind of women who think their life has been a sh*t sandwich and that the sh*t is somebody else’s fault. Instead of finding a frog and nurturing him into a kissable prince, they set about to dismantle and destroy him bit by bit. They turn a wannabe prince into a frog. How? Think negative energy field, big time. They’ve got you convinced that there is something wrong with you and not her. Your friends see it. Your mom sees it. But you? No way. Hang around and you will regret it. A rule of thumb: Any woman who says what went wrong with her life is somebody else’s fault is going to work hard to turn you into a frog, if you get our drift.
3. Catch Me If You, Can Young Babe
Young girls sometimes play hard to get. See, they want you to chase them because it makes them feel special. They pretend they don’t need you or anybody else when really, they want to be put on a pedestal and pursued. “I am so special that you have to work hard to get me to even notice you” is the way these babes operate. The thing is this, if you ignore her back, she will probably get mad. We know. We know. It does not make sense, but there it is. It’s an insecure, young babe trick for the most part. Although, older women have been sighted trying hard to pretend they don’t care. If we figure out how you can tell if they really are just not interested or putting on, we’ll let you hear. Don’t hold your breathe on that one.
2. Let’s Get Married Yesterday Mature Woman
Here’s something for free: If you are dating a woman and all her friends are married, then whether she’s divorced or has never married, watch out. Woman are, rightly or wrongly, postponing marriage and children in favor of building their careers. When they are 30 years old, that is one thing. But hit 35 years old and be on the downward slide to 40, and many women are going to start hearing biological clock go tick tock, tick tock. The signs in any relationship are pretty clear cut. She’ll go from hello to let’s move in together to let’s get serious pretty fast. She’ll start taking you for cozy domestic dinners with her married friends and begin showing signs of domesticity. Baking bread is a very, very bad sign indeed. You’ll have to decide for yourself. Is warm bread and a warm bed enough?
1. The Green-Eyed, Everywhere You Are Young Girl
There is jealousy and then there is crazy jealousy. Crazy jealous champion? No doubt it was Othello (of Shakespeare fame) who murdered his wife because he thought her unfaithful. The thing was, she wasn’t. Hey, we’re not saying that’s gonna happen to you, but crazy screaming jealousy is not to be messed with. She’s jealous of your friend, who just happens to be a girl. She jealous of your old girlfriends and your ex. You may be guilty of looking, but not touching. But as far as the jealous girlfriend is concerned, you are tried and convicted. Trust us, that kind of jealous girlfriend will start turning up everywhere you are. Run, don’t walk.