Relationships can be amazing and exhausting, loving and spiteful as well as raw and passionate. Needless to say, they’re complicated!
Relationships are based on a foundation of mutual likes and from there they grow into these unique stories that help define your relationship and life. Love, to most of us, can be described as the greatest feeling on the planet. Loving and knowing that you are loved at things that people strive to feel.
There are a lot of great things about finding someone to share memories with. However, like everything else, there are aspects that people just do not seem to tell you. This is where we at TheRichest come in, as we divulge 15 things about relationships that people do not always tell you but that you should definitely know.
The truth is, everyone has a different way of being in a relationship, there is no right or wrong way. However, there is some sort of unwritten code that many of us only realize once we are with someone we care about. This is not an article trying to tell you how to be in a relationship, this is just a reminder that is based on our experience on what it really is like being a girlfriend or boyfriend. We hope that you learn a lot about not only your relationship through this article but also about yourself. People tend to scratch the surface when it comes to relationships, but we are getting into some real and raw topics, which is what we at TheRichest love to do. Enjoy the read!
16. You Need To Do Things You Don’t Want To
This is something that tends to cause a lot of tension in relationships. Family events, birthday parties and weddings double when you are in a couple. Most people barely want to go to their own family dinners and friends’ birthdays that the idea of going to their significant others events seems like torture.
In a relationship, it is healthy to support your partner and their hobbies, and sometimes that also includes participating in them together. Although this can be extremely annoying, it is also something that is a big part of being with someone. Having the ability and the want to compromise is a great sign that you are not only a good significant other but that you also love the person you are with!
15. Getting Close Can Take Time
This is something that is different for everyone, but you need to be aware of it. Some couples meet and instantly they are attached at the hip, while other couples take a bit longer to reach that point. Regardless of where your relationship stands on this scale, don’t feel bad if it takes you some time to remove certain walls.
Couples do not become best friends overnight. This sort of relationship, especially the long lasting ones can take a long time to nurture. Trust, which most of you may know is the foundation of all healthy relationships, is also not something that comes without a great deal of hard work on both ends.
Everyone, even two people in the same relationship, may reach different levels of trust at different times. Everything that is good takes a little time and a healthy and solid relationship is one of those things that needs to be nurtured before it can blossom.
14. They Are Hard
I have never heard anyone that is married say that marriage is easy. Relationships, in general, are hard. They require patience, effort, compromise and respect. Relationships are often two strangers uniting and slowly becoming a team. The word stranger is so true because when you enter a relationship, you are unaware of what the other person (at least typically) has been through. Learning important things like what sets them off and what triggers emotions will come in time.
Relationships take a lot more than physical attraction and common interests. Yes, those things are important but sticking by each other through the hard times is what makes a good relationship turn into a great relationship.
Life is not always going to be easy, which is why it is no surprise that relationships are far from easy. But if you find the right partner to grow with, the hardships are outweighed by all the positive aspects brought on by love.
13. Intimacy is Important
No, sex is not the most important part of a relationship, but that does not mean it is not still an important factor. Sex is what separates being friends and being lovers. It is a way of connecting on both a physical and emotional level and it is a way of staying connected to your partner. A lot of people in long-term relationships seem to not put a lot of emphasis on this act but the reality is that it is essential to the well-being of your relationship. If you are not sleeping with your partner, there is more chance of them seeking the physical aspects of their relationship with someone else.
Get to know your partner on every scale imaginable. Sex does not only create physical intimacy, it also creates a stronger emotional bond and is a way two people can connect in the purest and most natural way. Find someone who you are compatible with both intellectually AND physically. If you can do that, then you are off to a good start!
12. Communication is Key
Communication is something that so many of us have a hard time getting right. Our generation especially has facilitated ways to speak to one another without really communicating. Most fights in relationships stem from a misunderstanding through miscommunication, which is why we at TheRichest are making sure we put an emphasis on this topic.
Communicating is hard because a lot of the time it is human nature to want to keep things inside. However, when you are in a relationship, the worst thing you can do is hold onto things because eventually, it will blow up in your face. We know sometimes saying how you feel or expressing something that has been on your mind is hard and scary but if you want your relationship to stand a chance, communication is a must. That does not mean texting every day and posting on each others social media accounts, it means actually taking the time to talk to each other face to face.
11. Honesty Is a Must
There is nothing that can tarnish a relationship more than dishonesty. A lot of people try to beat around the bush and skim the surface when it comes to telling the truth, but that only hurts you in the long run.
No, being in a relationship does not mean that you need to tell your partner everything you know, however, the major events that happen to your while you guys are a couple should be shared. There is nothing worse than finding something out about the person you are dating from someone other than them. This is something a lot of people try to avoid but many end up getting tangled up in a lie, which ultimately hurts the relationship.
10. Your Partner May Not Be Who You Envisioned
The person you end up falling in love with may not be who you imagined yourself with, and guess what, that is okay. Everyone, from an early age, has an idea of what their life is going to end up like and who they are going to end up with.
But as we are sure you know, life is full of surprises and a lot of the time you end of falling in love with someone that has none of the qualities you ever imagined yourself being with. However, if he or she is the right partner for you, then you will find yourself happier than ever. This is why you should never have any expectations of who you are going to meet and need to keep an open mind. Perhaps you connect with someone with nothing in common with your “ideal man,” but that person can turn out to be everything you need.
9. You Don’t Feel More Complete
Have you ever heard the saying “you can’t be happy with someone else unless you are happy with yourself”? Well, that is kind of what we are talking about here.
A lot of people enter relationships under the assumption that it the missing link to their happiness, only to find themselves miserable only a short while after. The best relationships come from two people who are fully secure and self-aware finding and accepting one another.
You should never look to a person to “complete” you, you are already complete. What you need to look for is someone who will better you, accept you and love you, however, that is not possible if you do not accept, love and better yourself. That is the most misconstrued idea when it comes to relationships, the thought that suddenly, by meeting someone, every problem they ever had would suddenly disappear.
8. You Will Have Stupid Fights
No matter how mature you are and how much you guys love each other, stupid fights are inevitable. Silly arguments are almost impossible to avoid because they can stem from anything. These fights are insignificant and have no real weight in the relationship but they serve as a way of testing couples communication.
Some couples take these little stupid fights and turn them into real, big arguments. Then there are those other couples that take these scraps with a grain of salt, using it as a way of getting to understand their partner better. Overcoming these arguments is what prepares couples to get through the big stuff.
7. You Still Need Your Alone Time
Spending time alone is one of the most positive and beneficial things you can do for not only yourself but for your relationship as well. We understand that when you fall in love, all you want to do is spend time with that person. However, this is what usually leads people to lose themselves while they search for someone else. This is a common mistake almost everyone has made, which is why we are telling you how important your “you” time is.
By putting some time aside every week to spend with yourself, you are giving yourself the space needed to still keep yourself as a priority. Sometimes, by spending a night or two apart, reuniting is amazing because you guys missed one another.
6. Not All Relationships Last Forever
A relationship ends in one of two ways: either you spend the rest of your life with the person or you don’t. Many people do not like to think about it and a lot of people do not like to bring it up but the reality is that even couples that get married split up.
Relationships, as previously stated, are a lot of work and a lot of the times people and circumstances change which lead couples to split up and go their separate ways.
This is the ugly truth about relationships and sadly a lot of people continuously get hurt because they believe that the person they are with is going to be there forever, when more often than not, that is far from the truth.
5. You Still Think About Your Ex
This is not implying that you want to be with your ex, but it is implying that just because you find someone new does not mean that your dating history is erased. It is normal to think about everything belonging to your past including relationships, that does not mean that you do not love your significant other. This simply means that your ex had an impact on your life, be it positive or negative, which is why they will cross your mind at times.
People in relationships try to pretend like their past does not exist instead of embracing it as something that has had impact on shaping you as a person.
4. You Will Hate Each Other At Times
Yes, you read that properly. There comes a time in every serious relationship when you think to yourself “I love him/her but I really don’t like them right now.” This, ladies and gentlemen, is normal. With all the emotions that come with being in a relationship, it is no surprise that tensions arise at times leaving you and your partner with a slight anger towards them.
The important thing to take away from the bursts of hate is the love that holds you back from walking away or making the situation work. Feeling this way is inevitable in all relationships but it is how you treat the other person, regardless of how upset you are, that makes all the difference. Yes, you may hate her/him right now, but love always trumps hate.
3. Cheating Is Easy
Cheating is easy, people. It is saying no that is the challenge. Let us be the ones to break this news to you, if someone wants to cheat on you, they are going to cheat on you, no matter how much fear you attempt to instill in them.
Cheating, especially in today’s society, is so accessible with social media and the countless online dating apps it seems as though the world is facilitating infidelity. However, for those good men and women out there, cheating is not and will never be an option. We believe that if you want to cheat, know the risk that you will be facing if you are caught. If risking your partner is worth the random hookup then you should not be with your significant other any longer, so do them a favor and end the relationship before you hurt them even more.
2. Friends and Family’s Opinion Does Not Matter
A lot of people chose partners in order to please their family members. This is something we at TheRichest never understood. Yes, it is very nice for everyone in your circle to love your partner as much as you do. However, the reality is that if they do not love or “approve” of who you want to be with, that it should not stop you from continuing a relationship.
Often times, parents think that they know what is best for their children and believe that they can handpick a partner for them. Life does not work that way, as most of you know, and love has never been something that was easy to explain. People fall in love with each other for inexplicable reasons and if your friends and family do not support your choice, that does not mean that you should back away.
1. Love Is Not Enough
The sad reality is that love in relationships really is not enough. As we mentioned before, respect, honesty, individuality, these are all qualities that make a relationship last. Another important factor around relationships is timing for both people. Perhaps you have met someone that you care deeply about, but it isn’t the right timing in your life to be in a relationship.
Love is the greatest feeling in the world but if you depend solely on love carrying your relationship you are in for a rude awakening. Especially when it is possible that factors that are outside of your relationship may cause everything to come crumbling down. Sometimes you love a person, but you are not in love with them. Sometimes you are in love with someone who is not good for you. Sometimes it is not the right time other times it is simply not the right person. There are so many reasons why you do not end up with someone, just like there are so many reasons why you end up with who you end up with. Relationships are based on a lot more than love.
With falling in love, there is always the chance of getting your heartbroken and the harder you love the more it is going to hurt, so make sure you appreciate every day you get to spend with the person you love!