The concept of the other woman is fascinating. Every story is completely different from the other. Some women find themselves ridden with guilt for getting involved in a relationship, while some say they have absolutely no regrets, believing that it shaped them as a person. Some claim that they were not at all to blame for breaking up a relationship because if the man was satisfied with his wife, he would have stayed put. For some women, it changed the course of their lives, giving them a husband and a family, while others would put the experience at the top of their regret list, finding it not sexy or exciting but instead ridden with guilt and shame. If there is one thing you can really learn from all these stories, it’s that you never really know what’s going on and that there are always two sides to the story. You can’t judge anyone because you have no way of knowing what happened from their perspective. Some of these women didn’t even know they were the other woman. Another thing to learn is that judging doesn’t help anyone. In all fifteen of these stories, judging did not help a single one of them.
Read on to find out how some of these crazy flings started, what was going through these women’s minds, and how a little flirting across the desk at work could change the entire course of your life.
15. If He Was Happy With Her, He Wouldn’t Be Playing With Me
An anonymous lady shared on glamour.com how being the other woman actually worked out for her. She started an office fling with someone who had a serious relationship with his girlfriend. It was just flirting emails and meeting up for lunch initially, but they were passionate, and the feelings they had for each other were electrifying. They were both full of guilt and kept wanting to stop, but they felt like they couldn’t. Their feelings were too strong. One day, she went on a trip with another guy and she just kept wishing that it was with her office fling the whole time. She couldn’t stop thinking about him. When she came home, she told him she loved him and wanted to be with him exclusively. He broke up with his girlfriend a week later and got with her. Now, they’ve been married for two years and don’t believe that either would ever cheat.
14. I’m Happy My Husband Married The Other Woman
Stacey Freeman shared on smh.com.au how she was happy that her husband left her for the other woman. About four years ago, she found out that her husband had been cheating on her with another woman overseas on his business trips. She wanted to know what was going on so she went directly to the source. She called the other woman and told her to back off. This lady told her it was too late; he already belonged to her. He was going to leave her soon. When he came back from his business trip, she pleaded with him to stay in the marriage, not to leave her, but it was too late. He ended up leaving and later marrying that lady, and they had a baby together. Stacey says that although it hurt at the time, she believes their marriage was already doomed to failure despite the other woman. They were like two colleagues living together amicably, with no love left. She’s glad he left so she can be with someone who really loves her.
13. I Still Feel More Sorry For Myself Than For Her
Gigi Engle shares her story on marieclaire.com on how being the other woman made her feel sorrier for herself than the girlfriend. She met a man in college when she was 19 years old and was told by a college roommate that he was the perfect match for her. When they met, they hit it off instantly; he was the most charming man. She knew he had a girlfriend, but it didn’t really bother her. They spent all their time together getting smashed, staying hungover in bed and having s*x. She says it was agony being the mistress, never being the first or last choice. It makes you feel like you’re not good enough. Eventually, she fell in love with him. She kept hoping he’d realize how amazing she was and leave his girlfriend. Of course, that would never happen. Eventually, it became sour to her, and spending time with him only made her sad. He eventually wanted to be with her exclusively, but it was too late.
12. We Were Both The Other Woman
Danielle Sepulveres shared her experience of being the other woman on elle.com. She was out one night and saw her boyfriend with another girl. She couldn’t believe her eyes. She ran to the bathroom and threw up. He tried for a long time to reconcile the situation with her, but she would not forgive him or get back with him. She continuously talked about how disgusting he and this other woman were. Talking about all her faults somehow helped ease the pain. A good while later, when she began to do some stalking, she found out that this other woman had been on the scene for a long time. Pretty much the whole time they’d been dating, he’d been seeing this other woman. He went to family events of hers, had cute couple pictures with her, and called her his valentine. Danielle isn’t sure if this other woman even knew about her. So they might have both been the other woman.
11. I Pushed The Idea Of Her Out Of My Mind Completely And Convinced Myself That He Was My Own
Natalie Miller shared the heartache of being the other woman on nylon.com. Her boyfriend had broken up with her, and she’d gone on a few horrible dates. She was out drunk and decided to meet up with a guy she’d been chatting to on Tinder. He made her feel complete. They kept meeting up. After a few weeks, he told her that he had a very serious girlfriend that shared her time between Paris and New York. She felt horrible, she’d never wanted to be this woman. She especially didn’t like it because of how much her own boyfriend cheating on her had hurt her. But he kept managing to convince her to see him. It sucked, and half the time, she was filled with guilt and shame. But other times, she just pretended he was all hers. He kept saying he needed to leave his girlfriend and even did for a short period of time but never properly. She eventually ended the relationship and never responded to him again.
10. I Got Pregnant With His Twins
A lady shared her story of being the other woman on glamour.com. She said at only 25, she’d been through a divorce with a man she’d only been married to for a year. She met this guy who made her feel alive again. Unfortunately, he was married, so she tried to hold off sleeping with him. But after a couple of months, she ended up doing it. She was shocked to find only three months later that she was pregnant…with twins! She wasn’t having proper periods so she didn’t even think getting pregnant was possible. She loves her twins but found it hard raising them on her own that she had to give birth with a friend there for support, no man. Years later, he tried to come back into her life, saying he’d got a divorce. Of course, after a while, realized that he was again seeing someone else on the side.
9. He’s Worth It, I Told Myself. He’s Worth Waiting For
Stephanie Regalado shared on xojane.com the experience that made her vow never to get involved with another man that wasn’t far away from his last relationship.
She looked over at the driver to make sure he knew she was changing lanes. A very handsome man smiled intently back at her. Once they hit the red light together, he looked and smiled again. Of course, she smiled back; he was gorgeous. When she finally pulled over, he pulled up not far away from her. She approached him and teased him for being a stalker. They started having coffee dates and meeting up. He told her he was married but in the process of getting a divorce and looking for a place to move out of his wife’s house, so they had to keep their relationship quiet. He was worth waiting for, she thought. One day, his wife phoned her, very distraught that she was trying to destroy her marriage that they were still working on. The agony in the woman’s voice was heartbreaking.
8. I Joined Forces With His Girlfriend
A lady shared her experience on glamour.com about being the other woman. She started seeing a man who told her they had to keep the relationship quiet because his crazy ex-girlfriend would track her down. Then, he started to tell her about other women he was seeing on the side, but that she was his main girl. She admits now that she shouldn’t have even put up with that, but she was in a bad place at the time, so she did. Eventually, she worked up the courage to break up with him. Later, she found out that he was getting married to one of the girls he’d said was crazy. She got in contact with her to find out how she was going through with it. She found out they’d both been dating him at the exact same time and both had been told the other was crazy. Now, they are friends and have decided they’re going to crash his next wedding together.
7. My Conscience Is Clear
Jessica Michell tells her story of being the other woman on mamamia.com.au and how she still has a clear conscience. Jessica fell in love with a colleague’s boyfriend. They started off as friends. He would often confide in Jessica about how terrible his relationship was. She tried to be there for him, but eventually realized that she wasn’t helping as a friend. He told her he wanted to be with her and started talking to her regularly in secret, hiding every part of their relationship from his girlfriend. His girlfriend found out and kicked him out, and he came crawling to Jessica. He was living in her house rent-free. She says the worst part of this whole experience was seeing the multitude of women who judged her and didn’t judge him. He ended up leaving Jessica while she was away on a holiday and running back to his old girlfriend, even ditching her cat that he was meant to be looking after.
6. I Attracted Nothing But Married Men
Another lady shared her story of attracting numerous married men on glamour.com. She believes she didn’t try to seek them out, but she did give off a vibe that she was easy. She didn’t think she was worthy of real love.
The first married man she broke up with was a lawyer. He didn’t actually tell her he was married, but she never asked. She started her investigations when she received an angry email from a lady claiming to be a wife, who was actually his pregnant mistress. He also had a wife. The mistress was already trying to get him to leave his wife for her.
Later, he got back in touch with her, and she was seeing him along with a couple of other men who also turned out to be married. It wasn’t until a friend told her that she was worthy of exclusive love that she learned how to find stability in her relationships and life. Now, she’s got her own husband.
5. I Gave Up On Love. On Life. I Stayed In Bed All Day And Didn’t Eat
Alex Alexander shared with yourtango.com her experience of being the other woman. She actually became the other woman on purpose. She didn’t want to be tied down with a relationship. She just wanted one thing from a man, so a married man was the perfect candidate. Although, she couldn’t have been more wrong. The time spent together caused love to spark, and dating secretly for three years definitely caused strong feelings to develop, to the point where she was becoming jealous of his wife and constantly upset. It was agonizing. He kept promising that one day he would be with her and leave his wife. After she ended the relationship, realizing he was never going to follow through, she became intensely depressed. A few months later, he called her and said his wife had found out all the secrets. He wanted to leave his wife and be with her in September once his kids were back at school. Now, every September, Alex is still hoping that he will leave his wife and be with her.
4. I AM Human, I AM NOT Perfect, And I DO Make Mistakes
Cassie Robinson shared on huffingtonpost.com for divorcedmoms.com how being the other woman changed her life. She never intended to be the other woman, but somehow found herself there, falling in love with a man who’d been her best friend. She said she wasn’t the stereotype you’d have in your mind if you thought of the other woman—sexy, alluring, promiscuous, in need of money, looking to be a homewrecker. Instead, she was just an average-looking mum, trying to do the best for her kids with a stable job, but she fell deeply in love with this guy. She honestly believed he wanted to build a life with her because that’s what he’d told her. She said, “I believed it because that is what I was told. I hung on to every kiss, every message, and every word. I am a smart woman, but looking back, I was stupid and so naïve.” She ended up admitting the affair to her husband and destroying her own marriage. The relationship with the man she thought loved her crumbled with the struggles of real life. She says she’s learned from her mistakes, and it has shaped who she is.
3. I Was Entitled To Take Happiness When I Found It
Sarah Hardie shared her experience of being the other woman on theguardian.com. When she met David, she felt something she had never felt before. It was so intense. David soon told Sarah he was leaving his wife and getting a divorce so they could progress with their relationship. Again, judgment from almost everyone was prevalent, but Sarah believed that if people just saw how good they were for each other, that they would understand. But they didn’t. Sarah felt guilty for contributing to breaking up a family, but she still felt she did the right thing. She believes you naturally look out for your own happiness, and if she hadn’t have gone through with this, she might now be alone rather than with David.
2. It Wasn’t The First Time For Me To Be In A Situation Like This
Zoe Ligon shared her story of being the other woman twice on refinery29.com. She said she went home with a very attractive Brazilian guy from a party. She had no idea he was married. It was only after she started to question him severely because the c*ndom kept breaking that he admitted he was married. He kept telling her he still wanted to sleep with her. She did not stick around.
She also slept with a guy that she’s been working with and had had a crush on for months. She went back to his apartment that he shared with flatmates after work one night. It was such an awkward experience as they tried to sneak around without any of the roommates hearing anything. He even made her sleep on the couch after. So that just in case his girlfriend came over, he could say that she had just crashed for the night after work. She wished she had just gone home. She says the image of the sexy affair was not at all true; it was just depressing.
1. I Was The Other Woman, But Now I’m The Wife
Kirsten Piccini shares with goodhousekeeping.com her experience of being the other woman. She honestly didn’t believe this was a territory she would ever cross, falling for a married man, but the chemistry was real. He was a fellow employee. It started off casually. But over time, it developed into a friendship, a flirtship, and then something neither one of them could deny. They didn’t enjoy all the gossip, and she didn’t like the fact that she knew she was breaking something to start her own relationship. Her friends and family warned her. People honestly thought all odds were against them; “once a cheater, always a cheater.” But she said that they managed to get through his divorce with his ex-wife, infertility for over four years, an extremely costly in-vitro fertility procedure, raising two twin boys, losing their parents, and getting married. Needless to say, fourteen years from that experience of being ‘the other woman,’ she believes they beat the odds and have weathered enough storms together to show that sometimes you still get the happy ending.
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