Men and women are different at a physiological level. I’m sure you all know that, but if you can believe it, a lot of people don’t know what’s what on the body of the opposite sex. That’s important, especially if you plan on handling the body parts of a person of the opposite gender. It’s important to know what goes where, how things work, and where things are on another person’s body, not to mention your own.
Some men might say that they know everything about a woman’s body. For example, they might think that they’ve got women all figured out. However, women are complex and complicated, and the same is true of their bodies. For those men who never got around to learning just how a women’s body works, here’s a crash course: 16 things that women would like to tell you about their bodies. Even if you think you don’t need this, chances are you do, because nobody knows everything.
16. Women’s body hair grows faster than men’s
A lot of women shave their legs and armpits, and some women remove even more hair than that. All of that hair does eventually grow back, and when it does, it grows back faster than men’s body hair does, or at least it feels that way when the average woman is shaving so much more of her body than the average man does. Men of all ages: don’t judge a woman for this. It’s just as hard for her to scrape her skin with a sharp blade as it is for you, and she has the added hurdle of having to shave around her ankles. Even if you feel some stubble, try not to complain about it.
15. Not every woman is a contortionist
This one is for the men who like to emulate the stuff they see in p*orn. For one, a lot of that stuff just isn’t feasible in real life, and a woman always knows when you’re trying to do that. Real women, or at least the women you will come into contact with (and on some occasions, sleep with), don’t bend that way. Actually, some of those positions really hurt and are super uncomfortable.
To be fair, most of the time, when women see stuff like this happening, they’re not going to complain about it. Honestly, they’re just hoping that you get that out of your system so you guys can move on to something that’s actually fun.
14. Looking good can be a full time job
As much as we want to believe we live in a Beyoncé song, no, not everyone wakes up like this. Sure, some women have been blessed with the clearest of skin, the highest of metabolisms, and the glossiest of hair, but most women have to work for that, and that’s okay. Looking good and living a healthy lifestyle can take on all the trappings of a full time job. There’s diet, exercise, makeup, exfoliators, moisturizers, hair treatments, and I could go on forever and still not reach the limit of what some women will do to stay pretty. Treat that with the proper respect it deserves.
13. Breasts actually aren’t exactly what they seem
Believe it or not, for women, our breasts just sort of sit there. If we’re particularly unlucky, they’ll give us a bit of back pain, too. On top of that, there aren’t a ton of nerves in there for most women, so men being hyper-focused on them doesn’t do anything for the women those breasts are attached to. Focusing entirely on a woman’s breasts sort of has the same effect as if you focus entirely on a woman’s arms. It accomplishes about the same thing. If the focus isn’t on a woman’s entire body, you’re not doing the job right.
12. Breast size isn’t all that important, either
This folds into the previous point about breasts not being all that sexual. Their size doesn’t actually matter, either. For one, the size of a woman’s breasts doesn’t indicate anything, or prove that they do anything better or worse than the next pair. For another, sometimes women can’t even tell the difference between cup sizes by eyeballing it, so there’s no way a man can tell, either. Let’s face it: men just want to hear a cup size above a B, and they’ll be ecstatic with that.
11. Ovulation is important
For those of you who don’t know what ovulation is, it’s the point in a woman’s cycle where she’s the most likely to get pregnant, or rather, it’s the perfect time for her body to fertilize an egg and keep it in the uterus, allowing it to grow from nine months and be born. This should go without saying, but some guys are just persistent on this matter, so I will say it as simply as possible: when a woman tells you she’s ovulating, and you’re not trying to get her pregnant, use protection. If you’re paranoid about getting a woman pregnant, offer to use condoms. On the flip side of that, women who are paranoid about getting pregnant should be using protection as well.
10. Hymens are not important
Let’s not even get into the fact that virginity in general has been a way to make women feel bad about themselves for millennia. That, for right now, isn’t the conversation piece here. What is important is letting men know this: you didn’t win the de-flowering race on a woman when you break her hymen. Mostly, you’ve ruined your sheets and you’ve breached a very easily breakable piece of skin. You didn’t win the lottery. If anything, by making a woman’s hymen so much more important than it has to be, you’ve taken part in a way of thinking that has made women feel bad about themselves for millennia.
9. Not every woman is capable of gushing
This one might make a dent in the ego of any man who thinks they were the reason they got a woman to do this, but this is about shedding light on the truth here, so here goes: chances are that woman did not squirt. If a woman can’t do it, she can’t do it, regardless of what you do or “how well” you do it. That woman would need to have the ideal set up of glands and muscles to accomplish that goal, and a lot of women simply don’t have that. She probably just peed on you, to be honest. Try not to think about that too much.
8. Looseness doesn’t mean what you think
I want to shout this one from the rooftops: looseness does not mean what you think. Women don’t overstretch, guys. Their bodies are capable of pushing out human beings the size of watermelons and recovering their natural tightness after they’re done with that, so there’s nothing that having a lot of sex can do to mess with a woman’s looseness or tightness. Actually, if you’re trying to get down to business with a woman and you find that she’s super tight, chances are you did something wrong.
To be fair, a woman can feel very loose if she doesn’t do kegels or exercise her muscles, which would make them weaker, so consider this a reminder to do kegels whenever you can, ladies. That’s the only way a woman would feel loose, so the myth that a woman’s looseness means that a woman sleeps around a lot should die right now.
7. That’s not how you use that
A woman’s sensitive spot (G) is not the only point of all of sexual contact. Much like the rest of a woman’s body, you can’t just poke around and hope for the best, you have to make contact with it in the right way. This is one of those things that has to do with speed, angle and how well you’ve warmed up your partner, not to mention how a woman feels that sort of thing. Either way, that’s not how you use that.
6. That’s not how you find that
There are some grown men who still don’t know where a woman’s clitoris is. Not only do some men need help finding the thing, they need help using the thing. This is different for every woman, so this is one of those things where communication is the key.
Furthermore, a tip for the guys out there: look at what you’re doing. Sometimes you might be feeling along for a woman’s clitoris and stumble across her urethra, and you might just go to town on the opening of her urethra because you didn’t look at what you were doing. Save your girl from a possible urinal tract infection and just look at what you’re doing. Women everywhere will thank you.
5. A few things women might not want you to know
I asked a few women about some things they’d want men to know about their bodies, and what it’s like being a woman in general. They were very forthcoming about that, almost legendarily so. Here are a couple of quotes from my notes.
CM: “I wish men knew how awkward it feels to sneak a fart out in public only to have it hide in your vagina and know that the second you stand up it will do whatever it wants. You have no control over it now, its just hiding. And you’re just keeping your sh*t together while you’re looking them right in the eye, flirting, and praying that they leave before you have to get up.”
SB: “Men knew their girl’s horniness when on the period and just brave the mess. Worth it.”
LN: “The painful nipples before getting your period, rise in acne, the unintentional mood swings.”
ML: “That, much like cars, we need to be warmed up and lubed up to go anywhere.”
ND: “I wish men knew that shaving basically our entire bodies is annoying and frankly, a lot of work, so when we don’t do it sometimes, leave us the hell alone about it. We aren’t hairless naturally, and unless you’re shaving your whole body too, shaddap.”
4. Yes, cramps really do hurt that much
Speaking as a woman here, cramps are horrible. They can completely ruin a woman’s day, to the point where some women can’t even function for the entire time. However, don’t take my word for it, take the words of the 21 women who talked to Buzzfeed about what it’s like when Aunt Flo comes to visit:
“It feels like the worst burrito-gas in your entire life, every waking hour, for three to seven days. Who knows how long it will last? It can be sharp, stabby, dull, achy feeling in your abdomen, or in your back. Then you get rivulets of blood complete with chunks for three to seven days. Tampon? Pad? Cup? Have fun choosing your weapon.”
“Pretend someone filled up a large water balloon inside your pelvis, about two inches below your navel, that slowly leaks its fluid with the end still tied over a five-day span. Yes, it gets painful. Yes, you have to use the bathroom a WHOLE lot more — or at least it feels like it and then *false alarm* you actually don’t. Other than that, it feels very wet and uncomfortable in places you’d prefer to keep dry and don’t get me started on the extra time it takes to maintain yourself and clean up…”
Men, try not to dismiss when a woman talks about her cramps, because chances are, she’s not exaggerating.
3. Hormones really do mess with your mood
Speaking of “that time of the month,” it’s not just physical pain women have to deal with. During Aunt Flo’s visit, women can become completely different people, and that’s because her hormones are all over the place. Believe it or not, periods are so awful for most women, that there’s an entire website that’s dedicated to taking submissions as to how horrible they are, and it’s literally called, Why Periods Suck.
Aunt Flo aside, hormones mess with women outside of that, too. Birth control pills are basically huge piles of hormones that are doled out in pill form on a wheel, that have the added benefit of weight gain and increased risk for blood clots. Sure, hormones affect men, too, but men already know that. Women are in the same boat.
2. Women are upfront about what they want
It’s a common misconception that women don’t know what they want. It’s surprising how many people still believe that when women have been upfront about the fact that not only do they know what they want, they have no problem spelling it out for you, too.
Take the past points that I’ve brought up; the reason that I’ve been able to get so many first-hand reports about what it’s like to be a woman is because women have had no problem spelling things out, even on public forums. Every quote thus far has come from a very public source, and women in general have no problem with that at all. Regardless, the point is that women know what they want, and they have no problem going out there to get it. As a man, listen to them. You might learn something.
1. Every woman is different
Finally, the most important point: every woman is different! This folds right into the previous point: listen to women, because not only do they know what they’re talking about, but they’re all different, so you can’t take the answer of one woman as the end all and be all of her gender. Every woman’s experience of being a woman is different for a variety of reasons, so the only way to understand them is to listen to them.