With the growing popularity of MTV’s Guy Code, guys all over the world have been forced to reevaluate their actions on a daily basis. We all know that it is against the Guy Code to ever get a manicure and/or pedicure, but what are some of the violations that you may commit without realizing it? Here are 15 violations of the Guy Code that you’re probably committing without even realizing it, bro.
15. Not Holding Your Own Alcohol
C’mon man! It’s one thing to be the one who holds back your girlfriend’s hair and make sure she gets into bed OK. It’s another thing for her to be the one holding your head while you pray to the porcelain gods at 3am.
14. Excessive Use of Grooming Products
We all know that guy. He spends 30 minutes doing his hair, 20 minutes moisturizing, and 10 more minutes priming his collar before a night out. Remember fellas, less is more when it comes to anything beyond the essentials.
13. Neglecting Your Vehicle
We aren’t saying you need to pull up to a girl’s house in a brand new car, but you need to work with what you have. Women like cleanliness and want to know that you will have sound transportation to get them home without a problem.
12. Invading Personal Space in the Bathroom
Guy code says that no man shall urinate in the urinal directly next to another that is currently in use, unless the situation is dire. If you must use it, don’t make eye contact or small talk with the unfortunate guy next to you. You come off as creepy and he certainly doesn’t want to hear about your fantasy football team.
11. Having A Custom License Plate
Don’t even think about it, CU69N…No guy should ever get a custom license plate. First off, your new license plate probably isn’t as clever as you think it is. Secondly, it makes for an easy target to any cop having a bad day and wanting to give you a hard time.
10. Acting Like A Child
We get it, times can get tough and it’s important to know who you can rely on when you need help. After a while though, girls won’t like the fact that their man is still getting an allowance from his parents at the age of 24. Get a car, find a job, and move on up out of the basement.
9. Hooking Up With A Girl Who’s Beyond Drunk
Instead of acting like the animal you are after you’ve had your case of Busch Light, do the right thing and help the poor girl out. Not only will it help give you a little more respect amongst her friends, it may turn out even better for you the next morning.
8. Hooking Up With A Friend’s Ex
Nobody likes to be left on the outside looking in, especially when it comes to girls. If you have your eye on a girl that used to be with your friend, talk to him about it first. Going behind his back to get a little action and destroying a bromance is simply not worth the hassle.
7. Backing Out Of A Bet
Oh, you were just joking when you made that bet? Too bad, sport. Backing out of a bet is another great way to lose respect amongst your friends. If a man is only as good as his word, think about that the next time you start to talk the talk.
6. Buying A Dog That Is Smaller Than A Cat
A basic rule of the Guy Code is that you cannot have a dog that is smaller than a house cat. Guys need dogs that can protect the house, be a wingman, and go on runs with them; I don’t think Yorkies fit that criteria.
5. Not Knowing How To Cook
Your lady friend probably doesn’t want to cook for you every night, and you probably don’t want to buy dinner every night. Save some money and get some brownie points by learning how to make at least a couple of dishes. The minimal effort will be well worth the reward.
4. …Taking Selfies
In addition to the limiting of selfies, please do not pull out a peace sign or duck lips; those are reserved for high school girls from the early 2000s. Besides, there is a finite number of pictures you should take of your abs and biceps, sorry dude.
3. Eating Salad As A Meal
I’m sorry, but a salad just doesn’t cut it if you are a guy. It’s alright to get a salad, but you need to get at least a tall draft beer and a basket of fries or cheese sticks with it. Leave the hamster food to the females at the table. By the way, if you have a girl that likes steak and burgers; Lock. Her. Down!
2. Complaining About The Choices Of Free Alcohol
It is completely against guy code to complain about the selection of alcohol when it is free. If you’re at a party or a friend’s house, don’t get on the host for not having your craft beer on tap. Free alcohol is a blessing, so be respectful or GTFO.
1. Judging Another Man’s Body
Nobody likes to be graded by their peers, whether it’s in the classroom, at work, or at the gym. With that said, it’s important to not get down on your friends when they have clearly hit the buffet line more than the gym lately. Be courteous, but you don’t have to throw out creepy compliments during the next set of squats either.