Being a big girl is rough; they can be punching bags both verbally and physically, looked down upon by strangers who feel they have the right to judge them, and worst of all people assume some insane things about what it is like to be big, curvy, plus size or whatever you want to call it. But there are myths about everyone and everything– everyone has a hardship to get through or are on a mission to prove such myths wrong.
With the recent surge in popularity in the plus-size industry, it may be now time to address some of these big girl myths, shine a light on them, and by doing so, be able to see how pathetic these stereotypes are. They lack of facts to back them up and are simply mean spirited. The world for a big girl is challenging, but now that they have a plus-size industry on their side, they can advocate and fight to shut those myths down.
Plus-size girls now have role models like Ashley Graham, Tess Holliday and Philomena Kwao to look up to and say it is okay if I am not a size 2-6; I can still be healthy, happy and a little bit bigger. These women (and many more) have single handedly broken down barriers and myths that have held plus-size women back for years. Here are a few of the myths you can now toss out the window.
15. They Are Clingy
Most people believe that when a bigger woman has a boyfriend she must have had to work extremely hard to get them and working double time to keep him. People assume that she is clinging to his side in hopes that someone else does not swoop in and steal him right out from under her obsessive grasp. That being said, come on, that sounds ludicrous; people are not automatically clingy because they are overweight. The truth is bigger girls can get a man just as quickly as any smaller sized woman can. She does not have to cling to him because she is overweight and knows that her time is limited, this little dig refers to her sanity and her security with herself. Any woman with a brain knows that if someone is into you, they are into you, no matter what you have going on. If he takes the time to ask you out then make you his girlfriend well, no clinging involved. However, if that is what shallow people have to tell themselves to feel better about their single life, then so be it.
14. They Are Afraid To Show Skin
Being a bigger girl comes with a stigma; along with the stretch marks, the rolls and the looks, big beautiful women have to deal with a particular weird rumor, apparently they are afraid to show skin. Where this idea resonated from will forever remain a mystery, the validity of it however is questionable to the highest degree. Being afraid to show skin is an individual choice; it does not always involve weight, it is a reflection of how secure one feels with themselves. There are plenty of bigger women who are showing skin, wearing crop tops, short shorts and tank tops. Granted, having this idea embraced in such a public way is a new thing thanks to blogs and the plus-size modeling industry, but it certainly does not mean that up until now bigger women were covered head to toe out of shame.
13. They Are Funny
This stereotype has been around for way too long. Fat does not equal funny, where did this little nugget of information even come from? Now, yes, some of them might be funny but that can be chalked up to genetics and personality, this does not mean that every chubby girl is going to have a joke up her sleeve every time she sees you. Are curvy women the new clowns? Must they entertain you when your bored? Were they put on this earth to be the butt of jokes for comedians who cannot come up with better material? This seems to be an ongoing incorrect piece of information that no one has even tried to correct, and shutting this myth down is essential to moving on with the big girl revolution. Their personalities are not made up of purely self-deprecating jokes that give you a few chuckles here and there.
12. They Hide Behind Dating Profiles
A lot of people assume that plus-size girls do not date; however, if by the grace of god they do manage to trick someone into dating them, it has to be through an anonymous dating profile. A profile that offers no picture, reads “prefer not to answer” under questions that ask for any kind of description when it comes to their body. Truth is online dating is horrific for anyone skinny, curvy, or plus-sized. Everyone has irrational fears when they are asked to fill out questions about their body. However, for a skinny girl it is called being coy or maybe a more extreme extent insecure for no reason (because she has nothing to be insecure about; she’s skinny) but for plus-size girls they are called liars and accused of trying to trick men into meeting them. Fortunately this is not true and it is proven by all the women who are married or in serious relationships.
11. They Hate Themselves
In order for someone to hate themselves they have to truly be disturbed, maybe have had a rough life, or not know the value of who they are, this is usually instilled in women from a young age. Hating yourself is not solely based on what your body looks like, granted it can play a factor in the grand scheme of things but it is not the only reason. Whoever started this myth probably hates themselves and used this as an excuse to project it onto other people, which is usually how myths start. Hate is a strong word to be associated with being overweight and makes people question how legitimate the accusation really is. In reality, there are big girls who love the skin that they are in, their stretch marks and everything else.
10. They Only Attract Fetishes
People believe that plus-size beauties have to take what they can get, which means dating the first guy who gives them any kind of attention good or bad. No one else will want them, right? They are too round, too flabby, their rolls are a turnoff and god forbid anyone wants to be with them unless they are hell bent on fulfilling some kind of fantasy that involves a big girl, food and a black, leather riding crop. It is highly insulting for people to assume that a plus-size girl has to go along with some kind of out-of-the-ordinary sexual fantasy just so they can get laid. The sad part is some bigger girls truly do believe this and assume that this is what love is all about. This myth is one that has to go away and hide in the back of a dusty old closet immediately. Plus-size chicks can have regular sex any day they want with no weird strings attached.
9. They Encourage Other Girls To Be Fat
The plus-size modeling industry has made huge strides in the last few years, not only are models coming in all shapes and sizes but the industry is no longer fearing the change and slowly but surely accepting bigger women as influential models who are doing groundbreaking things. Now here is where is gets tricky; just because there is more light being shined on plus-sized models, a lot of questionable accusations are coming out of the woodwork. One of the more popular ones is that plus-size models are encouraging everyday women to be fat. This is obviously not true, what they are doing is encouraging body positivity which means different things to different people, besides you cannot encourage a person to be fat, no one has that much influence on someone. This seems like another way for superficial people to hate on others.
8. Size 8 Is Plus-Size
Two words: “no way.” How can a healthy size 8 be considered plus-size? Has anyone actually seen a girl who is a size 8 pants? Most sane people would say she is a healthy weight for her age, height and size. Size 8 should be considered skinny, and a healthy skinny at that. What has happened to society when we consider a size 8 something to be ashamed of? Some real plus-size women would kill to be a size 16, let alone a size 8. It is like a slap in the face comparing a size 8 to an actual plus size woman. Who made up the law when it comes to saying where the cutoff was to be considered skinny or fat? Let’s be real for a second, a size 8 is not plus-size, this myth is not only annoying it is also detrimental to young women who look at these magazines and read these articles and question where they stand on the attractive scales. This is the stuff that fosters anorexia.
7. Will Do Anything To Be Skinny
Wrong again, not every big girl is dying to bring out their inner skinny girl. In fact, more and more big girls are becoming more confident in what their body looks like and more comfortable in their own skin. If they do decide one day that they want to drop the pounds they will be in the right state of mind to do it. They will have the mental stability, and be conscious of what the right and wrong choices are, all due to loving who they are with the extra fluff on. It is unhealthy to spend every waking moment obsessing over their body and how they can make it better, people come in all shapes and sizes and while it is a better choice to keep a healthy lifestyle, that healthy lifestyle does not mean that you have to be skinny or even be in a rush to be skinny. It is a daily struggle and an uphill battle.
6. They Are Not Intimate
Big girls need love too, at least that is what the common saying is. Why people are assuming that overweight women are not intimate is crazy and clearly false. Sex is a natural act and there are really no requirements when it comes to being intimate with someone. There is no golden rule that states that your sex life should depend on your pounds. If anything, bigger girls are having a better time in the bedroom than anyone else. Intimacy does not depend on the size of your pants, it is one part confidence, and one part willingness. Confidence is the hard part because, come on, who have you met that has not been willing? This myth is detrimental to young women, it puts a thought in their head that they should take what they can get because it could be the only chance they get it. They need to know that they too can say no, and be assured that another guy will come along.
5. They Do Not Work Out
More and more, bigger women are finding a gym and jumping on a treadmill so this whole big girls do not work out thing is a huge myth. Maybe in the past they felt weird about going to a gym, and being gawked at by judgmental meat heads. Thank god for places like Curves that gave women an opportunity to go to a gym and not feel out of place. Curves prompted other gyms like GoodLife Fitness and LA Fitness to block off sections of their gyms and call it women’s only. People see bigger women and assume that the gym is the last place that they would go. Or if they do see them at the gym they judged them for not working out hard enough. At the end of the day, some big girls just like to workout to maintain those curves that they love so much, the gym is for more than just losing weight. Weight loss is just a benefit of trying to live the healthiest life possible.
4. They Are Beautiful On The Inside
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder and truth be told, skinny does not represent beauty just as being extremely beautiful does not mean you have a garbage personality. It is obviously more important to be beautiful on the inside, this means that you can be caring, loving and accepting. Beauty on the outside is just an added bonus to how great of a person you are on the inside. Big girls can be beautiful on the outside and do not only have to rely on their personality in order for people to like them and want to be around them and pay attention to them. It is commonly believed that a beautiful girl with a horrible personality eventually becomes physically unattractive. This proves that when all is said and done, the physical aspects not only fade, but can only entice someone for so long until they get fed up and realize that they need someone with more substance.
3. They Can’t Get A Man
In fact they may take your man. Many people believe that bigger women are single and will be for life because they are not a smaller size. Truth be told, bigger women’s bodies are starting to be appreciated more and more. All the body positive ads seem to breaking down barriers within society. Besides the recent surge, bigger women have been getting men since the beginning of time. Guys seem to like a little extra meat on the bones and assuming that someone must be single because they are overweight is quite ignorant. Look at Marilyn Monroe who was a healthy size 14 at the time of her death and was hooking up with the most powerful men on earth at the time. So who is it that said they cannot get a man again? Historically men are attracted to bigger child bearing hips. What man would complain when they are about to bed a gorgeous woman?
2. Clothes Don’t Look Good On Them
More and more, bigger girls are throwing caution to the wind and taking pride in their body and guess what? They can look just as good as anyone else in all types of clothes. A crop top never looked so good and a bikini never looked so filled out. Curvy girls are cutting their own cloth in the fashion industry and proving that not only can they make an outfit look amazing, they can also look even better than a girl who has no curves, no bum, and no boobs. In the past a lot of women were frowned upon if they even attempted to wear something that hugged their body or revealed a part of them that was not fit and tight. Fashion does not belong to any one body type.
1. They Are Always Hungry
Where did this myth about big girls always being hungry come from? Not only is it offensive but it is pure speculation. Not every big girl is big because they ate their way there. The fact is that there are several medical conditions that cause both women and men to gain weight. Hypothyroid, diabetes treatment, stress and for women, a more common problem called polycystic ovary syndrome (PCOS). These are just a few of the common medical conditions that cause weight gain. Granted there are people with eating addictions, but it does not mean that every overweight girl is shoving food down her throat whenever possible.