From a young age, many girls are almost obsessed with the idea of romance. Patience ladies, the “one” is out there. You will find him at the oddest time, in the strangest way and it will fit. He will possess small characteristics from each category of guy you have dated, but he will, in his own way, be perfect and that is why he is called “Mr. Right,” because despite all the problems he may have (believe me girl, you are not perfect either) he will still possess the power to make everything in your world alright, making him the perfect one for you.
But before you do you find Mr. Right, you will find plenty of “Mr. Right Now’s” “Mr. What was I Thinking’s” and “Mr. Not for you’s.” Between high school and university a young woman will find herself dating a lot of different types of guys. It is important to date, and experience a variety of guys to see who it really is you are looking for. Some lucky ladies find Prince Charming in the first grade, but the majority of us have to kiss a lot of frogs before we find our prince. Between assholes and mama’s boys there always seems to be something off. These are the eleven guys you will have the lovely chance of dating before finding your perfect match.
11. The Playboy
Tall, handsome, athletic, assholes! We’ve all been there, getting caught up with some player who you probably met at some over-priced, loud club. This guy is usually the one taking pictures with his “bitches” and “bottles.” He will spot you out and make you feel special with his backhanded compliments. Later on that week he will take you out for dinner, pick you up in his nice car and open up about how rare it is to find a “good girl” out there. You, being a complete idiot will fall for this and eventually sleep with him. After sexy time is over, he will move on to his next conquest, he will answer your texts with brief and cold responses and will only initiate conversation after 2 am and only on weekends. This guy will most probably never commit to anything besides his usual table at the club on Friday nights.
10. The Bad Boy
Speaking of things to beware of, The Bad Boy is usually oh so good. The Bad Boy is usually found at the bar of the noisy flashy club, keeping to himself. This guy is dangerous, sexy and usually full of crap. You will try to be the girl to change him, don’t. Guys like this only get serious in their late thirties, if even then. Men like this stay boys for a very long time. They think being uneducated and unmotivated makes them cool. The only time dating a bad boy is acceptable is during the summer – rules are slightly different in the summer!
9. The Nerd
The Nerd is the guy you usually date during the semester. He is either the smartest guy in the class, your tutor or your TA. He will help you with your studies and write your papers for you. He is smart but lacks that swag your summer bad boy had. He will parade you around because, let’s face it, you are the hottest girl to ever talk to him, let alone date him. He will be sweet, caring and oh so boring. In time, you will pass your finals and realize you are not meant to be…maybe next semester you will try again!
8. The Sensitive Guy
You guys met somewhere cheesy like the flea market or at a crafts store. On your first date you watched some corny movie (ie The Notebook) and he didn’t try anything more than holding hands. He enjoys romantic comedies, snuggles and spends every Friday night watching tearjerkers. He is nice, cute and sensitive, however you are unsure if he has balls. The sex will be lame, he will most probably cry afterwards and for the first time in your life you will be the less dramatic one. You will stay with him for a while because he is such a nice guy…and because you haven’t found anyone more appealing. You will then break his heart, leaving him crushed and alone, and the nicest guy in the world, who never hated anyone, will hate you.
7. The Funny Guy
This is the guy who has always ended up making you laugh. He usually is not that cute, which makes him feel the need to compensate with an amazing personality. You usually end up hooking up with him after a few drinks when your beer goggles are securely fixed in front of your eyes. When your friends meet him, at first they don’t get it, but as the conversation goes one, they start to see what you see in him…a funny guy.
The problems occur when it comes to the bedroom. Most of these guys end up bringing their sense of humor in there as well, which is sometimes fun, but mostly annoying.
6. The Sweet One
He’s the guy that brings you soup when you’re sick, flowers on a weekly basis and always tells you how beautiful you are. This guy is usually a hard worker, and is proud to bring you around with him.
As much as us ladies claim to want a nice guy, we still need a bit of an asshole. We need a guy to put us in our place when we are having our weekly meltdowns, instead of a guy who will just agree with anything we say. Although this guy is a sweetheart, he is not challenging enough for a woman with a bitchy edge.
5. The Mama’s Boy
This guy is super respectful to women. He opens the door for you, holds out your chair and brings you flowers when he picks you up on a first date. The only problem is that no matter what, you will never be his main priority, because his main priority is his mother. They speak over 20 times a day, spend Valentine’s Day together and even have weekly date nights. While at first you may find it endearing, it will quickly become a huge burden.
This mother-son relationship usually has few or no boundaries. This guy either still lives at home, or gave his mom his extra key. On more than one occasion she will walk in on you in a compromising and perhaps embarrassing situation…not fun.
4. The Clinger
You actually hate this guy. He comments on every one of your pictures and sends you daily Snapchats and weekly reminders on how you are the most incredible girl…after one extremely awkward date over a year ago. You probably met this guy on Tinder and at first you were extremely smitten by his infatuation. However, after one conversation, he turns into your stalker. He knows your friends’ names, pets’ names and all ex-boyfriends within the first 24 hours of knowing your existence. Although this guy is super harmless you become creeped out and immediately tell him you have a boyfriend. This doesn’t work, you are stuck with this guy until he finds another victim. Quick, set him up with that girl you can’t stand!
3. The friend
A lot of girls end up dating one of their friends. This happens because there is a certain level of comfort that is already established. However, not all couples are Monica and Chandler, sometimes that comfort takes away from the romance and excitement of getting to know each other, other times the sexual chemistry isn’t as strong as their friendship and sometimes these relationships actually last (rarely). The worst part about dating a friend is when you realize he is like every other guy. This warps your perception and plays games with your head. A friend-turned-boyfriend will switch from friend mode to boyfriend mode eventually, and chances are he was a better friend than a boyfriend.
2. The Boring One
You probably met him at a wedding or museum. He is tall and handsome and you wonder why he is single. Three Grey Goose martinis later you strike up a conversation. You, being drunk, don’t realize how mind-numbingly boring he is. He is educated and sweet so you decide to go on a few dates with him. You find yourself saying “so…what else” after numerous awkward silences. Although the sexual chemistry is there, the mental stimulation is not. He will make some boring girl happy, but you are not boring, nor are you willing to settle for boring (you can settle for fat, but not boring!)
1. The Unbelievable One
The saying is accurate, some things are just too good to be true, and this guy will be one of them. On paper he has it all – good job, good education, good looks, good family – but he will intimidate the living shit out of you. You will be so nervous and so blinded by his numerous amazing assets that you will mess it up. You will fall so hard and so fast that by the end of dinner you have already chosen the house you guys are going to live in, the number of dogs you will have and all your children’s names. You will call him constantly and always be worried he is with another girl. You will then scare him off and he will eventually get a new girl, a more normal girl. This happens to most girls at least once, it just sucks it has to happen with this guy and not the clinger!